Hand philosophy professor the first draft of my magnum opus

>hand philosophy professor the first draft of my magnum opus
>he returns it the next week with a note saying, "don't bother"

Of all the things to take philosophy of, you and your professor decide to study philosophy of hands.
This is what happens when you take Derrida too seriously.

dont let your dreams be dreams!

hahahahaha m8 you got cucked

>turn in essay about Zizek's interpretation of Lacan to philosophy professor
>get an email saying to stay after class the next day to discuss it
>next day class ends and he stares at me unblinking until everyone clears out of the room
>he casually walks over and locks the door, then grabs my essay off of his desk and hands it to me without saying a word
>look at the essay and there's no marks, but it looks like its covered in dried cum
>flip the page and there's a giant F written across the page in what looks like feces
>next page is covered in a U, then a C, then a K, and the final page is just "(YOU)" written across it in dried blood
>look up at professor and he's stroking his cock while pissing on my shoes while still staring at me
>still got a B in the class

ok I'll bite. OP how old are you and what is your magnum opus about? and how are you sure that's your magnum opus and not just the dry run for your real magnum opus?

fuck offf reddit

the fuck did I ever do to you? I just asked a couple questions. you can be as salty as you like but I can guarantee you anything you write in college is not going to be your magnum opus.

That's not OP, friend.

Let us just say this, I have written a work which will profoundly change history...

If you think a book can change history your philosophy is retarded from the get-go.

same

gargantuan if factual

um sweetie have you read the bible :)

>hand philosophy professor the first draft of my magnum opus
>he returns it the next week with a note saying, "Brilliant! Absolutely brilliant!"

>hand philosophy professor the first draft of my magnum opus
>he returns it the next week with a note saying, "delight, simply delight!"

>philosophy professor
There's your problem. 99% of philosophy professors are cucks.

What does he know, right?
I am partly serious, though. Even smart people can be wrong.

>make funny joke
>No one responds
I now know how you feel, user.

Post it so we can judge you.

This, I want to bully you

He was testing you to see if you really cared about the subject enough to defy his advice

>hand philosophy professor the first draft of my magnum opus
>he returns it the next week with a note saying, "Holy.... I want more..."

>hand philosophy professor the first draft of my magnum opus
>he returns it the next week with a note saying, "What did he mean by this?"

What was it about?

>hand philosophy professor the first draft of my magnum opus
>two months later I find a copy of it at the library and his name is on it

Christ, this is my nightmare..

>hand literature professor my magnum opus
>he returns it the next week with a note saying "Second-rate, ephemeral, puffed-up. A nonentity, means absolutely nothing to me. Awful."

murder is your only option user, do it quickly. make him disappear.

>treasure this, as another person who gained this "criticism" is considered one of the greatest authors in existence
feels good famalam
>handing magnum opus to anyone other than a publisher
for what reason

The bible is a collection of books written and collected over a span of 600 years.

not so fast there champ

And it is bound in one book, known as the Bible, which has influence much of Western Thought.

Well done, you discovered the greatest book ever written.

Now, what were your thoughts?

represents a more mature philosophy than that expressed in tractatus. Great for btfoing some really lazy and childish arguments.

>he unironically believes that his book can compare to The Holy Bible
Fuckin'
W E W
E
W

>hand philosophy professor the first draft of my magnum opus
>he returns it the next week with a note saying that there isn't a single interesting thing in there
Who would call an orthodox typological study of the trees on Genesis based on Deleuze's Difference and Repetition "not interesting"?

Maybe that should have been your question

>hand my magnum opus to a publisher, rejected
>two months later I find a copy of it at the library and his name is on it

>hand philosophy professor the first draft of my magnum opus
>he returns it the next week with a note saying, "p gud"

>hand philosophy professor the first draft of my magnum opus
>he is never seen or heard from ever again

He'll probably steal some of your ideas and publish them as his own.

You got duped, OP.

>hand philosophy professor the first draft of my magnum opus
>it had gained sentience without my knowing and killed him, stealing his identity and moving to thailand to become a yaa baa kingpin

>hand philosophy professor over to my magnum opus
>MOOOOOOOOOORRRRRREEEEEEE

Maybe your opus wasn't magnum enough, if you catch my drift.

ITT
>pure ideology
"""""midterms"""" amirite???

>hand philosophy professor the first draft of my magnum opus
>

The bible only codified already existing social relations.

gilded

have you read the Bible?
obviously not

How much for this cato?

see this is why you get your work notarized before you show it to anyone. notaries are one of the most powerful entities in existence.

>hand philosophy professor the first draft of my magnum opus
Is this a meme? Or is it just a wannabe-meme?

Nice

Fuck this dog gone world

>hand philosophy professor the first excrement
>he returns it the next week with a note saying, "mole crickets"

>hand in
>B

with a lot of influence and cooperation from many authors and events in the span of 600 years.

Sorry champ, but smoking pot and watching "rick and morty" doesn't qualify has a remarkable influence. Just from your attitude i can tell writting is not mean for you.

It takes a while to finally understand what you're capable of doing and actually doing it. For example, my talent is foretelling.

This is my oracle to you: You are a ballon. Your pride will make you appear big from the surface, but there is nothing in between your head but air. There is not doubt, you will be a failure, and your bubble will be destroyed forever.

From there, you will have two options: Really start filling yourself with actual virtue or just die.

That's all i can say.

Sorry if bad english, my native lenguaje is greek.

>Hand Literature Professor copy of Infinite Jest
>He returns it the next week with a note saying "no discernible talent"

>Writting a Magnum Opus as a college student
lol

David Hume did it

>be philosophy professor
>some moron hands his incoherent world views in he calls his magnum opus
>want to kill him and then myself
>drink entire Whiskey bottle
>spend the rest of the week searching for the pages
>scribble "don't bother" on post-it and give it back

>hand psychology professor the first draft of my magnum opus
>he returns it the next week with a note saying, "the second part of the self-authoring program is now 20% off"

>freshman year in college
>hand in essay suggesting Chopin's "Story of an Hour" was not about a woman who hated her husband, but instead about a woman who detested the very idea of marriage
>professor calls me into his office later that week
>tells me it's discertation-worthy
>talks about my essay with the class for like 20 minutes
>Never pursue a degree because lol no money

>discertation-worthy
I think the actual reason for you not pursuing a career is that you are unable to spell 'dissertation'.

Addendum: … career [in academia] …

Why would anyone think she hated her husband?

Prove it.

Molyneux is that you?

>hand philosophy professor the first draft of my magnum opus
>he returns it the next week with a note saying, "a tour de force"