If you had to write one sentence to convince a stranger to get off a shitposting forum and go read or otherwise do...

If you had to write one sentence to convince a stranger to get off a shitposting forum and go read or otherwise do something constructive with their time what would you write?

perhaps you answered your own question

I am the Eggman koo koo kachooo.

Do you realize the illicit sensuous delight I get from picking my nose? I always have, ever since I was a child. There are so many subtle variations of sensation. A delicate, pointed-nailed fifth finger can catch under dry scabs and flakes of mucous in the nostril and draw them out to be looked at, crumbled between fingers, and flicked to the floor in minute crusts. Or a heavier, determined forefinger can reach up and smear down-and-out the soft, resilient, elastic greenish-yellow smallish blobs of mucous, roll them round and jellylike between thumb and forefinger, and spread them on the undersurface of a desk or chair where they will harden into organic crusts. How many desks and chairs have I thus secretively befouled since childhood? Or sometimes there will be blood mingled with the mucous: in dry brown scabs, or bright sudden wet red on the finger that scraped too rudely the nasal membranes. God, what sexual satisfaction!

there are so many better things to do

Kung pow penis

I would write

reminds me that there is a panty and stockings episode about that

Imagine being an old man, being pumped alive with medications, all of your bones hurt, your family is all dead, you haven't had social relationships of any worth for decades, you can't even piss properly on your own, and you realize you never grew up because you spent your life in a mental stagnation adorned with green frogs.

but im not that old

Give your mother a reason to love you--give yourself a reason to say it to her.

you will be

thank you for kind words

Sort yourself out and carry the world on your shoulders already, Pinocchio.
*starts crying

Wow, I'll give that series a try

Look, if you had one shot, or one opportunity
To seize everything you ever wanted, in one moment
Would you capture it or just let it slip?

Fuck off

if you want to end up like me, then by all means, stay right here and keep on shitposting.

Holy fuck, I'm off

>constructive
I wouldn't find myself in that scenario because I'm not fugging spooged

No one ever thinks about you.
Your mom is the only exception and she's just concerned with how much of loser you turned into.
She stops washing dishes sometimes,grabs the edge of sink for support and just stares at the floor rocking back on her heels slowly trying to put blame on her self ,her working schedule,were you were raised,your school ,your father...
she tries to figure out why you cant be successful in any facet of life; socially ,professionally or emotionally.She tortures herself over it because YOU DON'T .She thought you were special but you are okay with your mediocrity ,that's the wort thing for her .
But she is your mother so in some major way it's her fault.
That's what will end up killing her.The failure as a mother,a guide, a protector. She couldn't protect you from your own apathy.
You were always somehow skilled at verbal and English but she coddled you too much so you felt superior to working hard on anything and thus never had the grades or work ethic to succeed .
That superiority complex slowly turned into feeling outcast and bitter.
You are indignantly resigned to being alone but right before you go to sleep every night fantasized about changing.
You imagine getting in shape,getting a good job and really making an effort at making friends,getting a gf,following your ambitions of being creative.You are not going to live like this anymore.Things can be different.You had potential.People told you that once ,it must still be true ?
BUT THEN YOU FUCKING JERK OFF AND GO TO SLEEP. you used those fantasies to soothe your deep discontent for just long enough to delude yourself into sleep.Like an alcoholic and his discount grin,you tell your self that intricate story of your resurrection.
Tomorrow the cycle start all over again just like it always will.
This is how exactly your life will be when you're 50.
This is how your life will be right before you die .

That's it, never going back here again.