Buy avacado to make guac

>buy avacado to make guac
>Its hard

Just fucking kill me

You couldn't tell that it was hard before you bought it?

Why didnt you use jebs guac recipe you pleb?

...

>not buying it ahead of time
>not checking the color under the stem before cutting
>not check the softness before cutting
Dumb flyover

I'm Australian, young, and a newfag to avacado

Remember user, slow and steady, slow and steady. Also remember to vote for ¡Jeb!

Put it in the microwave for a few minutes till its soft.

making guacamole isn't that hard

I have free access to as many avocados as i want but i don't take advantage of it

Buying avocado is tricky business, sometimes you buy an avocado so unripe that you need to leave it in your will so your grandchildren might be able to make guacamole with it to feed to their grandchildren.

Most of the time when you buy an avocado it turns brown just as you cut into it.

Lol

Audibly kek'd

Yeah this.

>Sweet! They feel like they are really on point! Guac tonight baby!!
>Its some brown, rancid crap

OR

>hm, that avocado feels a bit too hard, but on the other hand, all the others are way too soft, so I'll just get that one and do my guac tomorrow when it'll be rype
>2 weeks later I finally cave in and make a shitty guac
from some hard cubes anyways

Only once I accidentally bought perfectly ripe avocados. Holy shit, those fatty fuckers can be really amazing!

Just put it in a shallow pan with 1-2 inches of water and steam for 2-5 hours and it'll be perfectly ripe

Avocado buying tip #1: Check all the avocados on display. If they all are hard, do not buy. Those are the avocados that will either A. Never soften, or B. Will go from hard to brown too quickly. You want to buy avocado from a lot they put out where at least some of them are getting soft. Then you'll know yours will ripen up as well. Obviously, don't buy from a lot where they are already all ripe to overripe.

Avocado buying tip #2: The smaller, the better. I nearly always buy the very small avocados that come in bags of 8, because the smaller avocados have much better flavor and smaller seeds. The larger the avocado, the blander it will be.

>!
>!
>!!
>!
You have to go back

check under the little nubby thing

if it's green it's unripe. if it's tan you're just right. if it's nearly black it's on its last leg or worse

Lrn2shop

>it's hard
What is the problem?
I make guac with an erection all the time.

It's clearly a female

I've never had a hard, or rancid avacado and I've only bought one a few times. I think you just need to learn how to properly tell if they're ripe or not.

Put it near a banana(s), the banana will release ethylene gas and make the avocado ripen faster.

Autist detected

don't do this it makes mustard gas

Pardon my ignorance, does this actually work or are you making shit up again?

inb4 you know you're on Veeky Forums, right?

It works.
Bananas cause other fruits to ripen.

Cool. Will try.

Normally I buy my avos hard a few days before I intend to use them.

You're supposed to check you fucking fool

this is true. Pic related.

It's true! Put them in a paper bag together in the sun to make it work even faster.

shit that sounds like fake advice but im being sincere