How to write an introduction?

I'm so fucked up right now guys. Been working on this passage analysis for Hemingway's short story "A Clean, Well-Lighted Place" for AN ENTIRE MONTH as of yesterday, writing and re-writing about twenty times now, examining it from all different angles. The intro is killing me, it still sounds so choppy and retarded and I don't know what to do. The essay specifically is on the passage where the young waiter tells the old man he should have killed himself, and I wanted to focus on the themes of hypocrisy and isolation. To me, the characters are very paradoxical in nature.

Anyone else every do an essay on this short story? Any tips or pointers on how to do a proper intro in general? Whatever you can suggest is so helpful, I tried taking a two day break and coming back to the essay and it didn't help it all. I'm so lost. Thank you in advance, anons.

>pic unrelated

Do like the old man, it's the only way out.

I wish I could, but my dream is to go to university. So I gotta do a couple dumb college courses first, before I can transfer in.

I'm usually really good with essays and Hemingway, but it's been a long time since I've been in school and I'm struggling a lot rn

Any other advice user?

What's the problem?
An intro is just explaining subject, problematic, approach, chapters, authors, sources, etc etc depends on what field
Unless you're incapable of explaining in 2 or 3 paragraphs what you're doing in your essay, I don't see the problem

You gotta show us your draft user if you want any actual help.

>explaining subject, problematic, approach, chapters, authors, sources

Could you be a bit more specific on what you mean? It's not a chapter novel, there's only one author. Actually wording is what's fucking me up so bad right now, everything I write sounds dumb. I've written the whole essay already, but I can't get the intro to sound like it fits in with the rest of it.

Just do what I always do and start off with a quote. "Hemingway one said, 'poop,' and this idea is perfectly encapsulated in his short story..." and then after that you can just go through the motions outlines here

Okay, you're right, here's where I'm at so far:

>Ernest Hemingway’s short story “A Clean, Well-Lighted Place”, written in 1933, is a commentary on hypocrisy and moral disengagement post-WWI. The story is set in the early hours at a café in Spain, two waiters watching their last customer – a deaf old man – drink alone. As the night progresses, one server becomes increasingly philosophical; the other callous and impatient. In the passage where the old man and young waiter interact for the first time, the contradictory nature of the characters and the degree of separation between the generation born before the first World War and those born after becomes apparent.

See what I mean? Is it at all obvious what I'm going to be talking about?

The teacher said not to start off with a quote, he doesn't like it and he'll take points away for it. He's such a hardass but I want to do well

I should add, the intro is short because the word limit is 650 to 750

Holy shit you've spent a month on 700 words? Are all American lit courses this retarded?

I'm Canadian. But yeah, I'm sort of one of those types, I can't move on til it's perfect and I think it still sounds like shit.

Top tip: it will never be perfect.

>Ernest Hemingway’s short story “A Clean, Well-Lighted Place”, written in 1933, is a commentary on hypocrisy and moral disengagement post-WWI.
Ok
>The story is set in the early hours at a café in Spain, two waiters watching their last customer – a deaf old man – drink alone. As the night progresses, one server becomes increasingly philosophical; the other callous and impatient. In the passage where the old man and young waiter interact for the first time, the contradictory nature of the characters and the degree of separation between the generation born before the first World War and those born after becomes apparent.
No you're resuming the source, not your essay, you should do this latter, in the intro you should say "in this essay we will try to understand how the author constructed his characters, the way they interact and we want to prove their paradoxical nature. First we will resume the text and explain the plot to give context. Then we'll look at the acts and characteristics traits of our protagonists, the work of x and y will help us understand the implications of the work. Finally we want to propose a more indebt reading of this book and we'll try to compare it to the rest of the author's work."
Not an English don't use that pls

Honestly I feel like I've been given a blessing, I worked on it for three weeks, submitted it, then the teacher sent it back and said he wouldn't mark it until it was the appropriate amount of words (I think I made it 830).

I reread it the next day and it was so bad, so much worse than it is now, tons of spelling mistakes and unfinished sentences, I just feel like he gave me a previous gift of a chance to do it again and I want to do really well. I'm sharing my progressive with my sister, who was valedictorian in high school and on the dean's list and 4.0 GPA and all that and is a lawyer now, and she keeps telling me how shit it is and saying to keep redoing it, I just feel like I'm going nowhere. She's not being unfair, I did tell her to not let me get away with crap writing.

Thank you for the help, what do you mean by "resuming the source"?

OP here, just wanted to add, the teacher sent me this as an example of what he thinks is a "good intro". Been trying to follow this pattern, but with a stricter word count limit

>Margaret Atwood’s short story “The Resplendent Quetzal” describes the experiences of a Canadian couple, Sarah and Edward, as they tour an ancient Aztec ruin in Mexico. Sarah and Edward are both deeply unsatisfied with their marriage, and much of the narrative follows the bitter and accusatory thoughts that they have about one another. The passage where Edward catches a glimpse of an oriole behind some foliage does not directly discuss his marriage to Sarah, but the scene nevertheless reveals the problematic nature of his desire. The fact that he wants what he cannot have suggests that his tendency to seek out new and “magic” experiences can result only in unhappiness and ingratitude. What is more, his desire for the bird to be something different from what it is suggests that what appears to be an enthusiastic interest in the bird is in fact a form of selfish gratification. By revealing the thought processes behind Edward’s desires, “The Resplendent Quetzal” shows how seemingly happy fantasies, and apparent dedication to others, can actually operate as forms of selfishness.

'In Hemingway's short story 'A Clean, Well-Lighted Place' (1933) a conversation between a deaf old man and a waiter stage generational differences in the context of post-War Spain. This conversation explores hypocrisy and moral disengagement following WWI.'

This whole essay sounds retarded. I can't even fix it, I just made it shorter. What level of study are you at? What is your focus? Are you using any other source? What will your reading do?

I haven't read the text so I can't offer advice on content.

>the whole essay
lmao

Anything helps user, only wanted some other perspectives. I'm in a first year English class, no educational focus yet.

>any other source
Yes, one, but that's all I'm allowed because I'm suppose to construct different ideas.

I meant focus for the essay.

The intro's purpose is basically this:
Introduce text
Introduce theme
Introduce theory/focus/idea
Suggest what conclusion you will get from focus

>Yes, one, but that's all I'm allowed because I'm suppose to construct different ideas.

American education is so fucking stupid.

If you post your first paragraph I'll look at that too

I'm still working on it, but essentially this is what I want to say:

>The old man is introduced as a failed suicide. His foiled attempt reduces his control in life to supervising the amount of brandy in his glass - yet even this is taken away when he is kicked out of the café early (52). He lives a contradictory existence, sitting in the dark of well lit cafés and not making a mess even after countless drinks (43).

I'm trying to fit in how Spain is a catholic country and looks down upon suicide as being a sin, but I'm still not sure why that fits in with my essay about hypocrisy and amorality. I didn't mention his deafness here because I bring it up later on in the essay, but I'm not sure if I should slip in a note about it real quick anyway...?

My structure is:
1. intro
2. old man
3. young waiter
4. older waiter
5. context, the fallout of world war 1 and how that is reflected in the characters
6. a note about the soldier and girl
7. conclusion

Sorry, this is for you:

>He lives a contradictory existence, sitting in the dark of well lit cafés and not making a mess even after countless drinks (43).

Is sitting in a lit room late at night contradictory?

I just read it. Which section are you getting the hypocrisy and amorality from? Quote the text. Is suicide immorality?

>>The old man is introduced as a failed suicide. His foiled attempt reduces his control in life to supervising the amount of brandy in his glass - yet even this is taken away when he is kicked out of the café early (52).

This is fine.

>resuming
I'm an illiterate I meant summarising,
Anyway, don't take my tips on intro because what your teacher gave you as an example for a good intro is not at all what I would do, or anyone that I know, it seems weird to me but if you want to please your teacher I guess what you wrote was okay

>Is suicide immorality?

Amorality*

Agree with this guy. Not what I would do either.

I'd also ditch the bit about Catholicism. You don't have the word count to do it justice.

I was under the impression, yes. He's sitting in the shadow of a well-lit cafe, I should also say he's drinking a lot and the waiter is spilling the brandy onto the saucers, but the old man isn't making a mess. I was also going to add that later on, he walks away stumbling but "with dignity", which is all contradictory and at oppositions for me.

Amorality is a separate continuing theme in the text, with suicide being considered amoral in Spain at that time period. That theme continues with the young waiter's callous attitudes towards the old man, which I bring up in my third paragraph when examining that character, and talk about their hypocrisy too

It's really helpful even to just talk this out man, thanks again for your help.

I totally agree that intro he sent me wasn't very good. I do want to please him, but at the same time - I had some pretty good English teachers in highschool, and I think I got some very good skills from them that he basically is telling me to throw out the window lol
Also I don't want to have points docked for not being original enough, like copying the layout of the sample text he sent me

Thank you, good advice. You're right, I'm just at the maximum right now too, but I'm gonna keep writing and just cut later in case I find better ways of saying what needs to be said.

But other than his suicide attempt, I'm not sure how the old man is as morally disengaged as the other characters... I'll have to think about it.

>amoral
Look up the difference between amoral and immoral. I think you've confused them (and me in the process).

He doesn't seem to me to be morally disengaged to me. He seems lonely, like the older waiter. He is deaf to other people and the final line suggests he may have insomnia.

Oh, fuck you're right I should be more clear. I personally feel like the younger waiter is outright unconcerned with morals and the difference between right and wrong = amoral?

Whereas the old man, well.... yeah, I could see why he would be more immoral than amoral.

Ah, you're right about the old man. But it doesn't make sense, if he was lonely, why wouldn't he reach out to the person who saved his life? Why is he drinking alone late at night?

The old waiter's insomnia does remind me of Waiting For Godot, the daytime being his Godot. I wanted to argue the older waiter has a bit of a character development, as if the passage, he doesn't defend the old man from his coworkers comments, yet later he does. I also say he points out the younger waiter's hypocrisy.

My conclusion is something like, they're all on this same path to the same end point, being like the old man, but just at different stages - and this is why the young waiter is so angry, even if he doesn't realize this is the case outright.

>But it doesn't make sense, if he was lonely, why wouldn't he reach out to the person who saved his life?

Because he wanted to die.

>Why is he drinking alone late at night?

Insomnia.

It seems to me that Hemingway is asking us to reconstruct a narrative for the men from the absences and silences in the text. We only know the old man tried to kill himself. We do not know why. In this way, the story mirrors the men's own inability to discuss their past and the reasons they are up late. We get a vague insight into the older waiter's thoughts but it doesn't offer anything conclusive. We can assume that the older waiter is a war veteran, and the younger one is not. We engage in a process of reconstruction, in which the causes are absent but the effect is present: both men like a clean, well-lit place.

The place of the cafe becomes a means of comfort and communication in the absence of its possibility verbally (the old man is deaf).

> "I am of those who like to stay late at the café," the older waiter said. "With
all those who do not want to go to bed. With all those who need a light for the
night."

>"...Each night I am reluctant to close up because there
may be some one who needs the café."

>My conclusion is something like, they're all on this same path to the same end point, being like the old man, but just at different stages - and this is why the young waiter is so angry, even if he doesn't realize this is the case outright.

I don't agree with this. It's just speculation, not textual analysis.

Not sure why my quotes fucked up here.

The darkness seems to stand for 'nothing', or be associated with it.

> What did he fear? It was not a fear or dread. It was a nothing that he knew too well. It was all a nothing and a man was a nothing too.

There's a kind of existential angst which is only placated through the establishment of an ordered, lit place. A very basic dark vs. light contrast.

>He would lie in the bed and finally, with daylight, he would go to sleep. After all, he said to himself, it's probably only insomnia. Many must have it.

I don't really know dude. I hope some of this is some help. I'm off to bed. If this thread is still up when I wake up I'll respond further.

>the cafe becomes a means of communication
this is a reeeeaaaaally interesting concept, one that I haven't thought of before. How is it a means of communication, like specifically how he uses the glasses and saucers from the cafe to get attention from the waiters?

>We can assume that the older waiter is a war veteran, and the younger one is not.
That's also a conclusion I drew from the text, and talk about the young waiter's lack of sympathy or understanding for a character who did experience war

>it's just speculation, not textual analysis
What do you mean? I shouldn't be so specific in my conclusion, or?

Yeah, that angst also comes from the corruption of the Our Father's prayer, but again that would be dealing with the concept of catholicism is Spain which another user suggested not to touch


That's really cool, you enjoy your sleep user :) Thanks for what you could contriboot

Fellow Canadian, to even things out I'm not at all one to spend months on just a few hundred words. On March 14th, something of a stressful day for me, I wrote 15,500 words. 10,000 of which were in the span of about 6 hours. Within 4 days or so I had a novella that I self-published, a drama. It was my first attempt at "outline writing" instead of "discovery writing" which seems to be my forte. I don't know if it's good or not, but I don't think it's bad. Anyways...

Like this guy says, it'll never be perfect. My first book that I wrote was about 77,000 words at the start, then the second draft was probably around 79,000 words, and then as I worked on the third draft it had gotten to around 80,000-81,000 words by the time I was around halfway through but I realized that this could go on forever. Also some real life issues had me decide to just up and self-publish the damn thing. Ultimately, I've heard it's quite good from a few reputable sources, those being complete strangers with unbiased opinions but experience in the genre I was writing in. Just write it, fellow Canuck. Just write it. If you fear for grammatical errors then do a second draft, but ultimately, Shia Labeouf. Just do it. Unironically.

Cheers from a goofy Newfie from my little rock on the East Coast.

That as the men cannot communicate with each other (deaf, war trauma), the establishment of an orderly, well-lit space becomes a means of non-verbal communication/comfort/assurance for both of them. The older waiter does it for help those who may also suffer from trauma/insomnia, hence why he does not mind staying up late.

The old man sits in the shadow of the leaves, so is partially obscured from the light/communication/whatever.

These are all late night and half-baked thoughts. You have a think about it.

>What do you mean? I shouldn't be so specific in my conclusion, or?

It just seems like a weak conclusion. Clearly there are concrete differences between the men, as you suggest yourself with the idea that one is a veteran and the other is not. To say they are all the same, just at different life stages, isn't very interesting imo.

Okay, last post. Good luck.

Thank you user. And congratulations on your self-publishing, of course. That's some really impressive word counts and timelines! You guys are right, maybe I am being too strict about this essay. I'll definitely try to stop stressing and see what comes out of that. Obviously I was pretty stressed to come hear for advice lmaoo

>East Coast
holy shit, that's big news. Haven't met a fellow East Coaster here before! Hello from New Brunswick :)
So glad to hear about east coast Canadian authors, there aren't too many good ones, and often they tend to be more conservative than west coast writers, which imo suck rn kek

Keep writing user!

Thank you the exploring, that is a very interesting concept I'm going to try and include and expand upon if you don't mind :V

It's cool man, thanks for helping anyway you can, I really appreciate it

>To say they are all the same, just at different life stages, isn't very interesting imo.
fuck you're right. I guess my conclusion is weak because my intro is fucked, and I typically try to echo concepts in the intro and conclusion. I'll work at it a bit more and see what comes from that

>thank you the exploring
nice
I meant, thank you for explaining