and the most convincing sex scene in literature is........?

/thread

>Samuel plunging his penis into my sister’s vagina through her closed room door

intense metaphor

There's a scene in JR where Gibbs and his honey get it on for a while that I really enjoyed

It's in The Castle by my boy Franz K.

Okay maybe Veeky Forums can help me here.... Is it cringeworthy for a woman to tell a man who saved her life and her daughter's life that he's "a good man" then kissing and fucking him right after? Does it smack too much of "nice guy" self-insert fantasy? She is actually attracted to him, and the scene felt nice in my head when I imagined it, with them wandering in the woods and the daughter back at camp, and them talking about her friend who died trying to rescue her daughter, and how he went along because he felt responsible for losing her, but how the main character had no stake in it, and she tells him it is because he is a good man (which soothes his soul a bit because not long before, he had basically tried to rape another woman in her sleep for certain reasons and had gotten exiled from another place because of it).

But after I wrote it out I felt like a fedora. Maybe it's just too much time on Veeky Forums making me think this way. The woman is also a single mother seeing as her husband was killed in war, so stupid meme shit goes through my head when i think of that part as well.

harkens back to the song of songs

gb2/r9k/

Post the scene, but intuitively I'd say it's trash, sorry

You might be able to save it with good prose or by just hinting at them having sex, I don't know

Goddamn that reminds me of the time I had to listen to people fucking through the walls of a hotel room and I ended up masturbating to it after feeling miserable because it reminded me how I was a virgin fuck. Saw the couple the next morning at the motel breakfast room, which just made me hard again. But overall it was depressing, I hate hearing sex in hotel rooms, I like to delude myself that it doesn't exist.

Well I changed it so that they are in different scenes now, because some people told me it was cringeworthy. I mean the entire story is genre-trash autism, I'm not trying to get it published or anything... but if I can improve it without deleting it that'd be nice.

pastebin.com/ZsFT6chQ

It's clearly Van and Ada hooking up for the first time in the hallway looking out at the barn-fire in pic related

>Can't recognize the magnus opus of the best writer of our times

Wow user you're such a pleb

i'll read it in a sec, sorry

Truly the mark of a supreme gentleman.

It's ok, it's probably really bad, but I will bookmark the thread and read your thoughts later.

>i just read IT and felt my peepee move guys
>is this what it feels like

holy...i want more

I've read it, I feel like I should be saying it's "cheesy" at times, and it is, but that's a pretty useless and po-mo kind of critique.

The dialogue feels unnatural and the prose uninspiring, it doesn't really grip me, but that might be because I don't know any of the characters and am not invested in the story at all. Surprisingly the sex scene was the best part
It feels bland, but not without potential, there are parts that are decent and stand out in the what is otherwise a pretty simple style. It feels like dirty realism without the urgency

>The rhythm built, and the leaves rustled.

I liked this, for example, you can be a bit more purple in your prose I think

>He looked at me with his mouth open and his dark eyes very big. It was as though he had just discovered that I was an expert on bedbugs. I laughed and grabbed his head as I had done God knows how many times before, when I was playing with him or when he had annoyed me. But this time when I touched him something happened in him and in me which made this touch different from any touch either of us had ever known. And he did not resist, as he usually did, but lay where I had pulled him, against my chest. And I realized that my heart was beating in an awful way and that Joey was trembling against me and the light in the room was very bright and hot. I started to move and to make some kind of joke but Joey mumbled something and I put my head down to hear. Joey raised his head as I lowered mine and we kissed, as it were, by accident. Then, for the first time in my life, I was really aware of another person’s body, of another person’s smell. We had our arms around each other. It was like holding in my hand some rare, exhausted, nearly doomed bird which I had miraculously happened to find. I was very frightened; I am sure he was frightened too, and we shut our eyes. To remember it so clearly, so painfully tonight tells me that I have never for an instant truly forgotten it. I feel in myself now a faint, a dreadful stirring of what so overwhelmingly stirred in me then, great thirsty heat, and trembling, and tenderness so painful I thought my heart would burst. But out of this astounding, intolerable pain came joy; we gave each other joy that night. It seemed, then, that a lifetime would not be long enough for me to act with Joey the act of love.

-James Baldwin, "Giovanni's Room"

gorgeous

not really a sex scene, but ulysses, penelope chapter. literally finished the book with a boner

>Eliza and Ezra rolled together into the one giggling snowball of full-figured copulation, screaming and shouting as they playfully bit and pulled at each other in a dangerous and clamorous rollercoaster coil of sexually violent rotation with Eliza’s breasts barrel-rolled across Ezra’s howling mouth and the pained frenzy of his bulbous salutation extenuating his excitement as it smacked its way into every muscle of Eliza’s body except for the otherwise central zone.

pastebin.com/YXCc63n7

unironically well written

> Upon awakening Reggie found herself bound and gagged to a chair. Tito was naked, standing in front of her with a big Hawaii boner staring her in the face. "As the ancient Hawaiians used to say...it's time for a dicking!" And at that, Tito leaped forward and grabbed Reggie's undeveloped breast. He grabbed with all his might, and ripped the skin from her body. Her muffled screams fell flat, and no one came to her help. The blood aroused Tito more than he'd ever been aroused. It reminded him of the stories his mother used to tell him of the ancient Hawaiian sacrifices in which the subjects would receive wounds to which the sacrificers would rape. He couldn't wait, Tito grabbed a hammer and smashed at Reggie's ribcage, again her screams were not heard. After breaking an opening to her insides, Tito plunged in.

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