How can you effectively write about something you haven't experienced?

You can't trick me into relinquishing my wizard powers that easily, succubus.

By all means, go ahead. But it'll be painfully obvious that you've never had sex before.

>We walked to the TV room together, and I locked the door. We were watching The Brady Bunch, which she had never seen. The episode, where the Bradys visit the gold-mining ghost town and they all get locked up in the one-room jail by some crazy old gold panner with a scraggly white beard, was especially horrible, and gave us a lot to laugh about. Which is good, since we didn't have much to talk about.

>Just as the Bradys were getting locked in jail, Lara randomly asked me, "Have you ever gotten a blow job?"

>"Urn, that's out of the blue," I said.

>"The blue?"

>"Like, you know, out of left field."

>"Left field?"

>"Like, in baseball. Like, out of nowhere. I mean, what made you think of that?"

>"I've just never geeven one," she answered, her little voice dripping with seductiveness. It was so brazen. I thought I would explode. I never thought. I mean, from Alaska, hearing that stuff was one thing. But to hear her sweet little Romanian voice go so sexy all of the sudden...

>"No," I said. "I never have."

>"Think it would be fun?"

>DO I!?!?!?!?!?!?!"Urn. yeah. I mean, you don't have to."

>"I think I want to," she said, and we kissed a little, and then. And then with me sitting watching The Brady Bunch, watching Marcia Marcia Marcia up to her Brady antics, Lara unbuttoned my pants and pulled my boxers down a little and pulled out my penis.

>"Wow," she said.

>"What?"

>She looked up at me, but didn't move, her face nanometers away from my penis. "It's weird."

>"What do you mean weird?"

>"Just beeg, I guess."

>I could live with that kind of weird. And then she wrapped her hand around it and put it into her mouth.

>And waited.

>We were both very still. She did not move a muscle in her body, and I did not move a muscle in mine. I knew that at this point something else was supposed to happen, but I wasn't quite sure what.

>She stayed still. I could feel her nervous breath. For minutes, for as long as it took the Bradys to steal the key and unlock themselves from the ghost-town jail, she lay there, stock-still with my penis in her mouth, and I sat there, waiting.

>And then she took it out of her mouth and looked up at me quizzically.

>"Should I do sometheeng?"

>"Urn. I don't know," I said. Everything I'd learned from watching porn with Alaska suddenly exited my brain. I thought maybe she should move her head up and down, but wouldn't that choke her? So I just stayed quiet.

>"Should I, like, bite?"

>"Don't bite! I mean, I don't think. I think—I mean, that felt good. That was nice. I don't know if there's something else."

>"I mean, you deedn't—"

>"Urn. Maybe we should ask Alaska."

But you can experience sex first-hand.

This always makes me cringe. No teenager is that oblivious when it comes to sexual activity. John Greene has some weird fantasies.

read some doujins and base it on that

bad advice
good advice
probably a woman
probably a virgin

OP, you know what you must do

Of course it's possible. Don't you remember that priest that wrote sex guides for married couples?

just don't?

your writing is informed by your personal experiences

why does your writing have to involve sex? your life doesn't involve sex

Sex in real life is awkward and messy. Vaginas don't taste that good and they make weird noises sometimes. I would stick with idealized descriptions if I was OP.

>OP, you know what you must do
I know, but how? Sex is beyond my grasp.

What is the context for this sexual encounter?

Sauce me boss

>Sex in real life is awkward and messy
lol, no it's not. Sex has never felt awkward with me, I'm not sure what type of situation you have to be in for it to be awkward. And it's supposed to be messy: love is messy--and there's beauty in that.

>Vaginas don't taste that good
Well yeah, they're not supposed to taste like lollipops. The point is to give your partner pleasure.

Idealized writing just leads to horrible writing.

>John patted Lindsay on the back of her head, which made Lindsay let out a sigh, not of relief but as a minute release of ecstasy she knew she was to feel. She fell onto the bed behind her, and John crawled atop her body, she could feel his aura above her while she kept her eyes closed. John grabbed his erect penis, and tried to throttle it into her vagina lips, or labia(s) as a doctor would call them. After a few cheeky urethral jabs, John managed to successfully insert the head of his penis into her flaps. Oh, how nice, Lindsay thought. She let out another sigh. At this point, John began to thrust his erect penis into Lindsay's crevice with a common rhythm, yet one that Lindsay could somehow not predict.

"Oh Lindsay, your puss is so tight," John said.
"ahh," Lindsay's subconscious replied.

Within twenty-five seconds, John's penis began to sqirm and his veins began to throttle inside LIndsay's vagina, vibrating against her vaginal walls, reminding her that it was not just the typical smooth dragon dildo that she was used to, but a real man's very real cock. A stream of semen sprung from John's penis, deep into Lindsay's vagina. Within one second of this explosion, John pulled out. He didn't want to deal with the reality he knew would follow if he continued.

In spite of John's best efforts, however, the spunk he did spray managed to be enough, as nine months later, OP was born. John really didn't want that.

That's how you do it.

>Idealized writing just leads to horrible writing.

It isn't possible to get more wrong than this.

Can't you women just go back to tumblr

How do you know the writers you admire weren't bullshitting? Half the sex scenes I read make me roll my eyes but I forgive them because there are certain conventions that have to be followed.

For example dialogue, any kind of dialogue, is highly idealized in fiction. There's no ums or likes or you knows or stammers. If you recorded yourself for a day you'd realize that your conversations are nothing like the ones you read in books.

I came

Why are women just so bad at everything? how do you manage to be shit at shitposting?
>idealized writing leads to bad writing
>love is messy (such a poor word choice) and and there is beauty in that
You can't get more "idealized" than that
Did you even start with the greeks?

I'm actually a guy. I just have regular sex.

The stuff I read generally doesn't have sex scenes in it.

With a lot of things it'd be pretty terrible. Unless the narration is from the point of view of someone who strongly idealizes said things.

Sex isn't that deep
I think it would be harder to convey the feeling of a kiss

>im a guy btw
dick or gtfo

Why do you even want a sex scene in your story? Does something happen in said scene that will advance the plot? If no, then even "And then they fucked" would be preferable to whatever trash you would try to conjur up. Sex is not something you can wing it on. You can write about war without having been to war because most people haven't been in war. Pretty much everyone has had sex though and will cringe at someone just imagining it.

If you want to read good depictions of sex, read Lolita or Nabokov in general.

The feeling of a kiss actually would be pretty hard to convey. I remember being shocked by how different it was to how I imaged it the first time I made out with a woman.

People always downplay the emotional and psychological aspect of sex, though. It's really hard to convey unless you've experienced it.

This. You can watch all the amateur porn to see what it looks like and stick your dick in a warm potpie to simulate the physical sensation, but this is only a fraction of the experience of real sex.

The emotional connection is always the primary thing, even if it's a hookup with a girl you're not particularly attracted to (e.g. you're getting off on the fact that you've convinced a girl you barely know to commit deplorable acts for your pleasure).

Your readers won't care if you leave the sex scene "off screen" but they will care if you write a cringy one that's obviously from the perspective of a virgin.

Most emotional experiences can roughly approximate other experiences. For instance, I executed a mercy killing on a chipmunk when my dog attacked it at the age of eight, and I felt guilty about it for fourteen years afterwards, and this gives me a pretty good understanding of the guilt accompanying a murder short of actually committing a murder. It doesn't give me a "perfect" idea, but this is certainly as good of an idea as I would like to have.

Sex, unfortunately, is one of those things you have to selfishly experience in order to write about it well.

>I executed a mercy killing on a chipmunk when my dog attacked it at the age of eight
what the fug.............. :DDD RIP chipmunk

VENGEEEAANCE

The guilt ate me alive for years. I still flash back to it and break out in a cold sweat, sometimes.

i raise and kill dozens of rabbit for meat every year. Wtf, man, it's just a chipmunk

If I'd killed it for a reason, if I'd eaten it afterwards, I probably wouldn't feel as badly. It was sort of purposeless, which is why it haunts me. I'm not so hung up on it now because I know that I can recall it to remind me of the feeling, so I'll never do anything similar again.

Are rabbits tasty? I don't think I've ever eaten on.

Sex is the final and greatest spook. The most spooked person in secular society is the average non-virgin man.

Living is the greatest spook. I'll keep enjoying sex while pursuing literature.

they're fucking delicious, almost a mix between chicken and beef. Need to mince or slow cook it though cause the meat is very tough. I started breeding them 5 years ago and i have a freezer full of meat constantly.

That's a smart way to cultivate meat. I will keep it in mind if I ever manage to start that farm I dream about.

>being this much of a pussy
OP
LISTEN
YOU KNOW WHAT YOU MUST DO
WHEN YOU REQUIRE SOMETHING FOR THE PRODUCTION OF ART
TRUE ART
NO PRICE IS TOO GREAT
YOU MUST OBTAIN WHAT YOU NEED TO WRITE YOUR MASTERPIECE
BY
ANY
MEANS
NECESSARY

no

Penetrating a woman feels amazing, what you wrote isn't true. Although some vaginas do smell and taste very badly. Vaginas aren't meant to be eaten, though.

This
Joyce asked Nora to have sex with another man just so he could write about it on Ulysses

I thought that he wasn't de facto cuckold, but felt like one

Anyone want to post some realistic sex scene passages in great literature?

Seconded. This. Motherfucka!

>realistic
>great literature

How can you effectively write about something you haven't experiences?

For instance, I am a human who has never been transformed into a monstrous vermin. How could I write an effective bug scene in a novel without experiencing metamorphosis first-hand? Is it even possible?

>her face nanometers away from my penis

In all fairness when realistic sex scenes were able to be printed "great literature" came to a halt.

I don't think she actually did it tho

>I promise you that doing this would lead to a horribly written sex scene.
Then you'll be true to what you're writing about.

>he thinks Samsa was a bug

I wrote fanfic when I was in seventh grade. They all thought I downloaded it somewhere in the internet. I was a virgin then, but a sick little fuck.

what was it about

>i had to google this to check if it was real
>"your client has issued a malformed or illegal request"

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK