Have you ever eaten something you knew was going to get you sick?

>A few times I used my reaction to get out of going to things I didn't want to.
you made yourself sick to pussy out of shit? jesus

Yep.
A lot of foods make me sick, especially before and since I had my gallbladder out. I can't be arsed to write out a list.

It's not like it's the flu or anything.

I used it to duck a few weddings that I didn't want to go to. I probably get bit about once every two or three months when something at a restaurant I've never had before sets of my allergy.

There's a dish in my family made with Velveeta cheese, frozen o'brien potatoes, and Miracle Whip.
Every time I eat it I spend the rest of the night on the toilet. But it's so damn good I don't mind.

Yes. But I don't get sick from it because I come from sturdy genetic stock and don't have faggoty intolerances / allergies to anything.

Cheap chinese food

Nigger detected

Super spicy thai food upsets my stomach, wrecks my sinuses, and makes my shit burn, but I just can't eat it mild and enjoy it

Yes. Once ate mostly raw chicken that was 'cooked' on a grill.
It was a 3 day weekend in highschool and some of my stoner mexi-bros and I got ripped and fucked up at a lake side cabin.
We were too high and did not have the patience to defrost the chicken first.
My ass blew apart later but I did not get salmonella.

Magic mushrooms.
Nothing will scare your parents more then when they find you in the bathroom laughing manically tripping balls with liquid spewing out both ends.

You could have just pretended to be sick.

Mushrooms never make me sick. I must be lucky.

sometimes ill drink like 5 cans of nos at once and get mad cramps for a day or two

arent all human beans lactose intolerant? cats too.

Often.

I'm allergic to wheat. I ate some really good udon at a place, had a reaction about 15 minutes into eating the noodles (swollen throat, hives in mouth, dizziness, difficulty breathing, panic). Then I felt it like a knife slowly tracing my intestine for two days.

But it was damn good udon.

>Chuck's Feed & Seed
I don't get it

If I eat steaks or any red meats I know I will get the shits 30 min later. Doesn't mean I will stop eating steaks for the rest of my life.

My colon cannot stand tandoori spice, but my sister moved in with me and made some fucking delicious looking chicken one night. I ate it, it was fucking delicious, and I payed for it that night as I leaked out of my ass for the next 5 hours.

I made a pork belly stir fry last night and was woken up in the middle of the night by gut-wrenching pain and spent an hour on the toilet. Today I doubled down and made another one with more pork belly to see what would happen and so far so good.

that's not normal
see a doctor

No

If I eat any kind of cream cheese I get terrible runny shits about an hour later. Cheesecake is my favourite dessert though so I only eat it when I know I don't have to do anything afterwards.
I'm not lactose intolerant because I can eat hard cheese and drink milk with no side effects.

Key lime pie made with fresh ingredients (not store bought) that had been sitting out on the counter too long. I couldn't help myself. Eight hours later I started puking my guts out every 16 minutes for the next 24 hours.

I wish I could be funny and say it was worth it. But it wasn't.

Eating a good looking girl's ass is one of life's greatest pleasures.
Having the same girl tongue your asshole is even finer.

Sneed
Feed
Seed

Chuck
F?
S?

I'm assuming feed and seed as well?
If one takes over a business and changes operations to a completely different product/service, they usually don't refer to the previous business on their signage.
Like why would a tool store for example, remind you that location used to sell maternity wear?

Hell yes i did.
i did it for fun, multiple times.

>me and friend kept ordering cheese pizzas at a turkish place
>always told them to make it as spicy as possible
>they basically brought us cheese pizza with a solid layer of chili flakes and spicy liquid stuff on top
>pizza was too spicy to eat
>we barely chewed it and swallowed it as fast as possible
>the day after was a disaster, every single time
you know when theres something in your body that needs to come out.
you feel how it fucks up everything, we literally felt nauseous and ill for the whole next day, we couldnt sleep either, couldnt focus, it was nothing but pain coming from the center of your body, radiating outwards. sometimes, walking wasnt possible.

everything for that one relieving shit.

nothing came close. of course it hurt, sometimes my asshole would bleed because of all the wiping i had to do, but when you got rid of it all, it was like a rebirth, when you hobble out of the shitter and you can finally rest. i always thought, that what jesus must have felt like walking out of his grave after those 3 days.

Raw mussels at a Chinese AYCE buffet

Every time I eat McDonald's. It's been almost a year since the last time; I woke up suddenly that night because I had vomited stomach acid.

...

I was taking some chicken out of the oven to flip over. Didn't hold the oven tray right, was too hot and it fell. Picked the chicken off the floor and put it back in the oven. Didn't get ill though so it all worked out

>sometimes my asshole would bleed because of all the wiping i had to do
Switch to wipes and you'll never have that problem again.
Get non-flushable, btw. Flushable wipes suck and you're not supposed to flush them anyways.

I think both you and your friends need an intervention for your anal fixations

reddit.com/r/AteThePasta/

>doing mushrooms when your parents are home

My father good food poisoning in a restaurant i really liked. He warned me but i didn't want to give up on it. Went there twice again and got mad shits every time.
I can't understand how they do not get shut down.

Every time I eat Domino's and one time at a BBQ joint where I was one if less than 5 customers and it was about time for my order to come out I heard a plate drop in the kitchen and people talking all frustrated but then within like 30 seconds I had my plate of microwaved reheated brisket. 24 hours later I had the shits and cold sweats marathon of my life. It was like 2 or 3 days of pure stomach acid and water leaking from my asshole.

Of course. Tailgate chili. Multiple times.

Formerly Chuck's Fuck and Siuck

> stake

Why would you willingly eat something you know makes you sick?
Degenerate.

Whenever my parents pick up thai food, I'll have some if I really feel like it while there's a 80% chance I'll get mild diarrhea 30 minutes later.
I also ate chicken parmesan every week for a couple months and got the runs everytime before I realised I'd turned lactose intolerant

There is no lactose in parmesan cheese dumb dick.

Chicken parmesan is usually made with sauce containing cream you retarded cock

>Veeky Forums - Food & Cooking

Most of the stuff I ate when I was in China

Find out exactly what it is, user.
Then I'm sure you can find brands without it.

I'm not really lactose intolerant, just lactose sensitive I guess. I can drink milk in small amounts with no problem, but more than 8 ounces or so gives me trouble.
Yesterday at work, I walked down the street to a little cafe with my coworkers, like we do every day.

On an impulse, I bought a bottle of chocolate milk and a bear claw. Drank the whole bottle.

autism

There's lots of recipes with just red sauce and cheese. If you like the dish that much you'd just make a small modification you autistic fuck.

I ate at this shitty chinese dumpling joint once. I could basically sense the poor food hygeine as I walked through the door, but I was starving and had basically no money, so I scraped together what I could for a meat dumpling set and got it down me.
It made me queasy for a whole week and I had the shits for the next two days

don't fuck with chink shit brehs.

Watch he takes your advice and has colon cancer

Made a whole big fucking wok of chow mein for my family and got completely stuffed. Later that evening my brother offered to order some pizza, and obviously I agreed. It doesn't help that I'm a lanklet and don't eat a lot on any other day.

I go to KFC roughly once ever six months, and then I remind myself why I don't go to KFC anymore.

Also, cigarettes, but that's just an unhealthy habit.

The Chinese food place I order from has gotten me sick like... 5 times, and there was even a special about them on the news where they were caught keeping food outside in the back alley.

But it's the best tasting Chinese delivery in the area, the cheapest, and there's always actually meat in their dishes whereas the other places will give you like 5 pieces of meat and the rest is just filler.

Plus I'm pretty sure the delivery guy works there 7 days a week, 14 hours a day, and he's really nice. One time he helped put my dog back in the backyard when she'd gotten outside the fence.

>go to local diner type place with family on christmas eve
>Nobody there, 1 waitress 1 cook
>sit down and look at menus
>waitress mentions everyones home sick because of the flu
> no other restaurants open guess we will stay
>food was good
>24 hours later everybody is vomiting and shitting
>I wish for the sweet release of death as a I dry heave for the thousandths time
>grandma and aunt have to go to the hospital
>grandma almost dies
>puke non stop for almost a week
>lose 15 pounds
>shittiest christmas ever

lesson learned: If the entire restaurant has the flu don't fucking eat there.
The second she mentioned everyone was sick I knew we were in for it. Gotta love small towns with no restaurants.

>Like getting buffalo chicken subs from wawa
>Used to get them with (pickled) jalapenos
>Tended to do this at night with friends
>Wake up the next morning feeling like I had a ball of hot burning nickle making its way through my intestines
>Terrible, burning pain in abdomen
>had to take burning shits of fire to relieve the pressure

I experimented a bit with what I did or didn't put on the sandwich and the issue ended up being the jalapenos. Even when I knew this I still got them sometimes

Pani Puri in india
Tasted good but my diareah was basically just water at one point

even better a bidet, use it americans!

I used to suffer from severe constipation, like take-a-shit-once-a-week-and-have-to-dig-the-rock-out-of-my-ass-with-my-hands level.

There was a Chinese restaurant I found that would reliably give me the squirts. That place was an absolute godsend.

oh god no you didn't!
you fool!

jalapenos cause stomach pain and shits for me. I still eat them if i know i will stay home next day

>when you eat your wood before it matures
feels bad man

You madman

>arent all human beans lactose intolerant?
is this bait?

Eating cigarettes? Yeah sounds unhealthy

On a board more or less dedicated to hedonism in one form or another someone is a bit of a prude.

Same here but with raw oysters on the halfshell at a Chinese place 2 hours inland.

Don't even fucking say a word. I like potato chips, and can't eat them very much or I'll get fat.

I tried out these Pringles Fat-Free chips because they were super low-cal. BBQ flavor. the fuck.

The can said they had 70 calories per serving, which meant the whole can had 490 calories inside total. I could munch through a can in a day with my lunch, dinner, etc. So I got several cans, and began enjoying one a day for the past four days. But what they dont fucking tell you...

Except in tiny print you cant read without a fucking electron microscope

...is that the primary ingredient is something called "olean" which I have since learned is Latin for "Unwashable & Indestructible Ass Grease."

Oh Yeah. I'm not even kidding.

So today, while I'm standing in the living room debating whether or not Laundry or Dishes will get done first, I get the urge to fart. I live alone, so sweet. I let the honk loose and its wrong. Something just sounded wrong. I know my own wind, and I have never farted a sound that sounded like a fart wrapped in a pillow.

Oh yes, something was very wrong. I had just shat myself. But this evil olean makes shitting yourself sound almost like a regular fart, and had I not been particularly attentive, it could easily have gone unnoticed, I'm telling you. THAT's how utterly covert and evil this olean stuff is. What the fuck?! What if I'd gone out to hang with friends or gone for a drive, what then?

>Power goes out & wake up to freezer full of Alaskan caught halibut defrosted
>just in time I thought
>make like 20 lbs of nice cheek meat and filets
>delicious until middle of the night when I accidentally shit myself when throwing up in laundry hamper bc I could make it to restroom

Kebab. In a dirty road house. Far away from the city. Made from frozen meat. Served in stale bread with ketchup.

Ate moldy piece of bread.Tasted like dirt and it did nothing

Same.
Wanna breed?

As someone who used to use wipes, get a bidet. There are so many more benefits:

>blast shit off your anus
>water enema for that tiny bit of poo that you know is stuck inside but won't come out
>don't have to keep poopy wipes in a trash bin, stinking up your bathroom
>ladies will appreciate it, especially for their time of the month
>that thing that happens where you wipe and wipe but there's always still a little bit of poo left, like wiping a goddamn marker, will literally never happen again
>don't have to stop by the store to buy wipes every 2 months

You can get them for as little as $15 and installation literally takes no more than 10 minutes.

I spent a few months in India. So yes. Basically everything you are was a diarrhea coin flip.

Drank some unboiled water in some bumfuck village in Nepal.
I knew I was gonna pay for it, but I just did a big hike and it was like 35°C.
Had the shits for 1 week, lost about 4kg.

Hawaiian baby woodrose seeds
not worth it

When I was there I took water purification tablets. They worked quite well.

>worked a 12 hour shift at my job with a 2 hour commute
>Only ate once during the day
>Very hungry on the way home, pass by this tiny bar that advertised a 50 cent wing special with $1.50 drafts.
>Wings sounded like the greatest thing in the world at that moment
>Got them and they were still a little frozen in the middle.
>Ate all 12 of them anyways because I was so hungry
>Next morning I puked and shit my brains out and had to call into work.

microwaved chicken wings at a 24 hour bar in pattaya thailand at 0700 after fucking a ugandan hooker.

I puked for 2 days straight just... acid.... it took 3 years to eat a chicken wing again.

There's a point where overesting simply becomes masochism, and I have reached that point several times.

Starting in 1996, an FDA-mandated health warning label read "This Product Contains Olestra. Olestra may causeabdominalcrampingandloose stools(anal leakage). Olestra inhibits the absorption of some vitamins and other nutrients. VitaminsA,D,E, andKhave been added".[12]

These symptoms, normally occurring only by excessive consumption in a short period of time, are known assteatorrhea, and caused by an excess of fat in stool." From Wikipedia.
The same article goes on to mention that clinical trials showed normal consumption doesn't really do anything, but you eating a shitload of it... yeah.

youtube.com/watch?v=zc3vAdsiPV4

>he can't stomach andouillette

eating is eating

Not eaten, but beer.

Too much alcohol

Periods and commas exist for a reason.

What kind of shit fucking freezer do you have that a 5 hour power outage made everything defrost?

Lmfaoo wut

This. My power was knocked out for 30 hours a few weeks ago and the food was still frozen but it's pretty full and we never opened it. He was probably an autist who went and opened it every 15 minutes to see if it was staying frozen, lol.

That stuff is industrial lubricant now, IIRC