Hey cu/ck/s...

Hey cu/ck/s, I started working at this assisted living facility as a cook and the cooks are supposed to make a little snack for the residents to eat at the end of the night.

The other cooks, of course, are complete fuck-off lazy dickwads and just leave canned pudding or easy frozen cookies. They get the same shit every day. I want to try some other things and I'm looking for some ideas. I have limited shit to work with unless I want to buy it myself (I do not) so fancy shit that requires blow torches and specialty baking pans is out of the question.

So far I've made donuts and donut holes, soft mall-style pretzels, pizza rolls (like a cinnamon roll, but sauce and pepperoni instead of brown filling), pound cake, raisin bread, boneless chicken wings, and banana bread.

These guys are old and like old-timey shit. My pound cake came out dry as fuck because the oven sucks and they raved about it for 3 straight days. That was 2 weeks ago and today I had 2 different people tell me how much they want more pound cake.

Help me help these old fucks die happily.

Other urls found in this thread:

geniuskitchen.com/recipe/hot-fudge-pudding-cake-ii-4332
allrecipes.com/recipe/27183/queijadas/
mrfood.com/Misc-Desserts/Delicious-Dessert-Recipes-Vintage-Desserts-to-Remember
twitter.com/SFWRedditVideos

I'm guessing you're American/work in America, have I got that right?
If so, I know Americans (and the rest of the Anglophone world) fetishise breakfast foods. In the US, this would mean American pancakes, bacon and eggs, French/gypsy toast and scones/Ameribiscuits, yeah? So something that plays on that theme. French/gypsy toast would be a very good choice, I think.

Have you thought about making more pound cake? Not really a troll just go with what works, they're old people they're not picky

Make more pound cake

>I have limited supplies
>Doesn't tell us what exactly he has to work with
Here are some ideas
Banana split
Brownies
Seven layer cake

I used to make pina colada muffins for brunch in a cocktail bar all the time, with a cherry for a garnish. I just dumped some pina colada mix into the banner and boom. They worked out okay.

user you sound like a nice guy. According to my ol' daddio, old people like apple crisps, pies, gooey chocolate cake, and crunchy stuff.

Oh, and outside of that, I've always wanted to try monkey bread. It looks delicious as fuck. While I know how to bake, I never seem to get around to making it.

That, and macarons. Old fucks love macarons.

Update: He also likes fruit, sorbet, smashed up frozen fruit, smoothies, and fries.

I've made like 4 already. Seriously I'm tired of making it.

I actually made some french toast pigs in a blanket (breakfast sausage wrapped in super sweet french toast covered with confectioner's sugar and served with maple syrup) and they hated it. I mean, the second time I made it 2 people showed up to eat it (out of the usual 20-25).

>banana split
>7 layer cake
Thanks!

That reminds me I made a "poor man's" apple cobbler on a really lazy day one day and they flipped. That shit is like crack to them. Thanks for the suggestions!

I had no idea what these things were until you said this. Thanks user.

Another update: If there are any that are healthy and able to cook, see if they like to cook and if they wanna help. My old dude loves cooking and all that stuff. Don't know what the rules are at your facility though.

Pineapple upside-down cake?

They're strictly forbidden from entering the kitchen.

HOW HAVE I NOT THOUGHT OF THIS?>!?

We had pineapples last week and I used them to make ham like a pleb.

Make them feel like a kid again.

They literally had this like 5 times a week before I started working there. Although I guess I could make them super gooey ones instead of the instant frozen shits you just pop in the oven for 10 minutes.

yeah do it up homemade. You can taste the difference.

I love the slight tangyness of homemade cookies with slightly too much baking soda in them like my mom used to do

Maybe get your hands on some buttermilk for the real old timers

chocolate covered pretzels sprinkles with chopped walnuts.

Old people love dennys and other "blue plate" diners like that.

Simple basic old fashioned shit like chocolate cake, milkshakes, or apple pie

>Maybe get your hands on some buttermilk for the real old timers
That's the tough part, it's not really an "upscale" place if you know what I mean. The owners are kinda "can you do without it.... if you reaaaally try?" kinda people. Hence the shitty co-workers.

>chocolate covered pretzels sprinkles with chopped walnuts.
Walnuts are out due to choking but hell yeah crunchy pretzels with chocolate sounds great, thanks user.

I've never once been to Denny's. Chocolate cake and apple pie is their normal desserts for dinner and shit, so they have that all the time. How do you make milkshakes that are still good say a half hour after you make it without it freezing or melting? I leave about half an hour to an hour before they eat the snacks and trust me the aides that pass out the snacks absolutely will not go through the trouble of making a milkshake.

They might like this. It's a chocolate cake with a chocolate sauce baked into the bottom, you just have to be careful not to overcook it (if your oven runs hot, maybe check it before the suggested baking time - you want the top to be dry but the bottom to be liquid)

geniuskitchen.com/recipe/hot-fudge-pudding-cake-ii-4332

This sounds awesome user, I'm definitely going to use this. I have to make pudding tomorrow for lunch, I'll surprise them with this.

Okay so you said the other cooks used jello pudding packs and whatever, but every old person I know has loved either butterscotch, tapioca, or rice/bread pudding. Also coconut macaroons with a maraschino cherry on top and lemon meringue pie. What you're doing is lovely.

Every single thing you listed is impossible with the ingredients I get and the utensils I have.

Except the rice pudding, which I'll be using. Thanks user.

I swear you guys are giving me ideas for things that anyone would know and I'm just slapping myself in the forehead thinking "of course!"

Godspeed user, you sound like a really nice guy or gal. Also make some flap Jack's or fudge.

Also:

Peach cobbler
Blueberry muffins
Shortbread cookies
Dutch baby
Apple dumplings

Bless u famalam for treating those folks right

Get like a 1965 Good Housekeeping cookbook from a thrift shop and just grind that out. THey will love that old school shit.

You can't make macaroons? They're literally just sweetened condensed milk, flaked coconut, and beaten egg whites. Even if you can't get coconut you could bring it in yourself.

Bread pudding, son. Bonus points if you make some ice cream to go with it.

sponge cake

easy to get down without many tooferz

Fruit parfaits too. It's just simple syrup, whipped cream, and whatever fruit you can get. Plus they get the vitamins from the fruit.

>I've made like 4 already. Seriously I'm tired of making it.

Yeah well, welcome to the culinary profession.
But good on you, OP, for trying to make these folks' lives just a little better.

Be warned about macarons: they're really annoying to make and require a fuckton of almonds. Macaroons are easy and I'll bet. old people like them. My grandpa is addicted to peanut butter cookies in a bad way, but your old people might also like them a lot. As many anons have said, soft things like puddings are great and you can get really creative.

This is adorable, I hope you get many sincere yet mung-bean-scented hugs

Do you get your geographical information from a cartoon by any chance?

Peanut brittle.

Godspeed, good man.

bananas foster

allrecipes.com/recipe/27183/queijadas/

Try these, it's a Portuguese dessert. It's hard to describe - kinda like a cross between a German pancake and baked custard. They're really tasty, easy to make, and uses simple ingredients. You can sprinkle with shredded coconut before baking or serve them with fruit or a sauce.

Rice pudding is great and old people love that shit. Banana pudding too. They are both super easy as well

My grandma's depression-era chocolate cake recipe is a favorite snack - unfrosted or sprinkled with powdered sugar (once the cake cools)

3 cups flour
2 cups sugar
1/3 cup cocoa powder
2 tsp baking soda
1 tsp salt
2 cups cold water
3/4 cup oil
1 tsp vanilla

Mix all these together. Eat some batter.

Mix in 2 TBS white vinegar. (don't forget)

Bake at 350F. I don't know how long to bake it, just keep checking it with a toothpick (after 30 minutes for sheet cake, 20 minutes for cupcakes).

Why don't you just ask them?
Just go 'Is there a specific snack or recipe you folks want me to make sometimes?'
They'll love it, especially the fact you actually want to put in effort for them.

ginger cake.

That's nice of you. I hope some fine (non-resident) dime picks up on this and sucks ur dick.

Anyway, sponge cake would be my suggestion.

U a good man op

hash brownies just ring local cops for a donation for the elderly bet you he a good nigger and will help a brother out peace out user out

OP, that's nice that you care about the elderly. Respect.

Old people like pies. Thanks for doing this for them. I had a lot of old relatives who stayed in places like the one you're working at. The level of care varied and sometimes it was really bad. I appreciate you trying to be thoughtful and do nice things for them. Those people are special to someone and it feels good to know that they're being cared for. Thanks OP

in germany old peoples favorite cake is shortcrust pastry on large trays, tightly fitted with inseason fruit like plums, very easy to do in huge amounts

bagel with lox

pound cake

boiled sweets (homemade)

peanut butter, lettuce and mayonaise sandwitches with the crusts off.

this is all old time stuff my grandpa loved.

This

to add onto this,
shortbread ,scones with jam and cream, baked milk, jellied salads. cool whip and pear.

dear old grand dad could live off these things, but he died from an untreated bullet wound. bless his soul

K O L A C H
O
L
A
C
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God bless you OP.

My mother used to make something called Danish dessert - You need zwieback/rusk crumbs, whipped cream and apple sauce. Just put those ingredients in some large casserole dishes, in several thin layers. Just make sure the applesauce goes on top of the crumbs, not the whipped cream, the crumbs stick to the stuff. If you have glass bowls or dishes it looks really nice too. It can also be stored for quite some time and it actually gets better if it kept in the fridge for a bit before eating.

Dane here.

I'm not sure where that abomination came from, but it's sure not Denmark.

try potato skins or roasted potato wedges
smash burger sliders might be a good idea too

Cute Yamada, OP.

This is what he means. Where in Denmark do you live, out of curiosity?

Another childhood illusion ruined, thanks.

You really never had æblekage?
If you're ever in Odense I'll make you some. That's just depressing, man.

Bread pudding. ( add small diced apples, raisins, even prunes).

Cranberry pie.

OP checking in. Just got home. Today I made apple cobbler for lunch, peanut butter cookies for dinner, and rice crispies treats for a night snack.

Thanks for the ideas anons. I was talking to one of the residents when I served the snacks and I told her I got the ideas from you guys. She gave me a hug and told me to pass it on.

I also talked to the kitchen manager and we should be getting some more ingredients to work with soon. I'm gonna end up being a pastry chef when this is all over.

Make Key Lime Shiners.
>pound cake
>fresh strawberries, halved
>whipped cream
>key lime simple syrup
Delicious and simple.

How much money would it cost to buy ingredients for desserts you'd like to make but don't have ingredients for. Because I'd rather donate some of my shekels to make a group of old people happy then continue to buy fast food and games on steam I'll never play

Biscuits with apple butter. They'll pinch your cheeks and slap your back.

something nice, on *my* 4chins?? REEEEEEEE

Why is it called gypsy bread?
Like if you turn your back on it for to long douse it steal your toaster

So generous, much nice. See this post for my exact reply.

I'd love to but you'll never guess why I can't make apple butter.

>French Toast pigs in a blanket
I can't believe I've never thought of that before

first off, thank you for what you're doing for these people. it's incredibly sweet that you care so much, and i'm glad to know people like you are working in assisted living facilities.

>banana bread
>monkey bread (if it doesn't have to be individually served)
>mini pies (like lemon or custard cups)

They're fantastic man. Make sure you make them nice and sweet, it pairs very well with the saltiness of the breakfast sausage.

Pic isn't mine but it might as well be. They looked exactly like that. The french toast kinda falls apart a bit no matter how delicate you are.

It's funny because when I first started there I didn't want to interact with these people at all. Now I make like 15 different specialty orders for dinner every day based on what I know those people like. They don't even ask, I just remember how they like things.

>when op isn't a fag

mrfood.com/Misc-Desserts/Delicious-Dessert-Recipes-Vintage-Desserts-to-Remember perhaps some of those are doable

i hope you know how much that means to them, user. these facilities are oftentimes HORRIBLE, and these are people who have lived long lives and who are too often lonely and neglected (emotionally.) you going out of your way to give them a nice meal or dessert is an incredibly sweet and thoughtful gesture.

I'm not American, but I would suggest going for more traditional snacks, whether they're throwbacks to the American 50s or more traditional European pastries. I don't mean to be an asshole, but a lot of American snacks seem to be based on modern commercial products, so these old people would probably enjoy a throwback to something more traditional.

How far can you go with cooking? Could you do like a theme menu? Something like serving them food ala a diner from the 50s.

This is a good idea. Im sure a lot of them are second generation immigrants and have desserts from their parents and grandparents home counties they haven't had in years.

europeans are wild

Make one of those disgusting jello casserole things from the 50s and make them feel like they're 5 again

I wouldn't say the one I work at is HORRIBLE but it's certainly not great. It's very low-budget and the quality of the workers is lackluster. Sadly I'll be leaving in the next few months because they're only paying me $10/hour, I'm just there saving up for a car.

God help those people when I leave. You should've seen the food they served them when I first got there. They just took spaghetti sauce right out of the can and gave them that. Didn't even bother to season it. Go to your nearest store and buy the cheapest possible sauce you can find and add water. That's what they got. Gross.

The owner sets the menu with no wiggle room. I can and have made changes, but only through her. They used to have this shrimp noodle casserole thing and it was disgusting. I got them to replace it with burgers and fries because they absolutely LOVE my burgers. I made them during a cookout once and they pestered the owner until she put them on the menu haha. Now if I can get a deep fryer or even a simple thermometer for the oil I can make them some real nice fries.

Most of them aren't THAT old. And the ones that are don't really have much left in terms of sanity. Although there is a lady there that's like 99 and completely together in her head, she can't eat ANYTHING. Everything upsets her stomach. Dinner today was stuffed peppers and mashed potatoes with corn with an alternative of salisbury steak. She had toast and butter.

The majority of people in my area in general, not just at my job, are Polish, German, Irish, or Italian. I'd say about 50% Polish though. My grandfather (Irish) used to sit around bitching about all the Poles. He hated them.

Y'all know any snacks or treats or w/e that come from Poland let me know. Their cooking is pretty similar to Irish though. Lots of cabbage and potatoes and soups.

You’re doing gods work user.

I have a few suggestions on what my grandmother used to love, (rest in peace grandma)

- angel food cake with strawberries and powdered sugar on top
- apple strudel
- coffee crumb cake
- tomato bisque and grilled cheese (cup size with a diagonal piece of grilled cheese)
- yogurt parfait
- oatmeal cookies, (homemade of course)
- key lime pie
- lemon squares, anything lemon really

Hope this helps, you’re doing a great thing.

My grandma loves lemon is all I really know, I just wanted to post something because this thread made me feel something. Thanks OP

No. I get it from living in the US for the last 15 years straight. Americans fucking love their breakfast foods.

Maybe they disliked the sausage rather than the toast? idklol

It’s probably because it was too sweet or too many flavors/overpowering.

Fucking love pound cake, but ive only had the sara lee ones that come in the aluminum container.

Deeeeelicious. Its quite stuffy but when you wash it down with cold milk its something else

Lets hear it. Did someone fuck it up for everyone

I take the Ron Swanson approach to diet myself. Vegetables are for rabbits, I fish but I don't eat them because they're basically a vegetable, and nothing beats breakfast foods.

There are some good ideas in there, user. And they eat grilled cheese as an alternate sandwich for lunch a lot, so I can def throw in some tomato bisque for them.

No, the owner is too cheap to spring for a deep fryer or a dutch oven. I told her it's legal to use a home deep fryer and she was like "oh it would cost too much." Bitch, get me a thermometer then for the oil. "I don't know how to use Amazon." Pic related.

The salty sausage and umami sausage/egg/bread combo actually balance out the sweetness of the sugar and syrup quite well. Guys, they're fucking delicious. I'd eat them every day for breakfast if they weren't a pain in the ass to make.

*sniff sniff* Do I smell a profitable mass-produced frozen microwavable breakfast idea?

America leads once again

That's an entirely different product user! Pigs in a blanket is not corndog.

OP do you make breakfast food? I'd recommend kolaches. They're everywhere here in Texas and more popular than donuts.

And not the kind that are basically fruit danishes, these are sweet bread with sausage and cheese inside.

Buttermilk pie. Trust me on this one OP, it's GOAT.

You don't know the half of it...

I don't normally work mornings, but I can make the sweets and/or breakfast-for-dinner style plates for a snack.

I'm gonna try kolaches at some point. They've been mentioned a few times this thread.

Buttermilk is hard to get around here. Unless you go to a farm. I don't live near a huge city.

Be careful what you feed the old folks. They have special dietary requirements. Giving them something different may seem like a good and kind idea, but you may be hastening their demise. If you make regular cookies and you get some diabetic in trouble. Elderly with heart problems cannot have lots of sodium. Find out the dietary requirements/restrictions and tailor the snacks to each one.