Times you hurt yourself while cooking

>be making some sausage in the frying pan
>they smell fucking delicious
>they're done
>poke one with a fork to take it out of the frying pan
>boiling grease jets out
>all over face
>would have been in my eyes if not for glasses
>people at work all ask me what I did to my face for the next few days
>just mutter incoherently about cooking oil each time

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=iRUSQm5ZskQ
youtu.be/WbvoOCN3R8M
twitter.com/AnonBabble

Happened to me when I was 16. On Halloween and it was almost 10 years ago now.
>super hot pan
>way too much oil
>drop cold steak in a way the front slams down and sprays oil out
>oil all over my face
>some hit a tear duct
>I lucked the fuck out that none got in my eyes
>horrible scabs and people looked at me like I was an AIDS victim at work and school
>easily the worst pain I'd ever experienced and my family said my scream was the most fucked up thing they'd ever heard

Wanked it after cutting some habeneros.

Fell onto a grill with no shirt on. Butned half my back.

just got an oil burn below my middle fingers nail 2 days ago when making steaks.

on time i was cutting myself a sandwich with a bread knife. the teeth lost the grip on the crust and i hacked it into my left thumb. thumb was more or less split but just on the edge. i was tempted to just rip the peace of but it hurt to much so left it there. grew back together but i can still see the scars 5 years later

feels good man. it's like shaving your face and applying aftershave; a sharp but cool and refreshing touch.

Worst single burn was baking a frozen pizza nearly blackout drunk. My hand touched the top of the door, but my reaction time was so bad I can remember hearing a sizzle. I could even smell it I think. If I wasn't wasted I imagine it would have been pretty painful.

i hope you get shot, fucking edgy faggot

Don't do this. Its what he wants, just report. I know that isn't as emotional gratifying, but if you want it to change, its what you need to do.

already done. but this faggot has been spamming Veeky Forums the entire day and the mods are being useless fucking garbage as usual

I cut my thumb and nail while grating cheese for pizza. Missing a piece of your nail is a very unpleasant feeling.

Ja/ck/?

>could only fap to 2D scat until a couple months ago because 3D shit is disgusting
>kinda find this arousing now but not enough to pop a boner
Boy can't wait for my next progression

>jack
>using hot oil
As if.

>not even thinking of washi by your hands after cutting habeneros
Where did your parents go wrong, user?

Happened after my first few times using a mandolin a couple of years ago.

>slicing up a cucumber
>get down to the very end of the cucumber
>didn't slow down in my slicing speed nor did I use the holder tool that came with the mandolin
>managed to cut a very sizable chunk of the pad of my left index finger

I learned why people fear/respect mandolins from that.

>Cooking chicken with herbs in olive oil
>Throw in a little vinegar
>Oil begins to jump and a flame bursts out of the pan
>Burns my hand
>In a complete panic I drop the pan from the fire and it falls on the floor
>Burning oil everywhere
>Floor absolutely ruined
>Hand burned

My landlord wasn't pleased.

>mandolin

>Old dude at work
>Grease fire in the kitchen
>Used water to put it out
>3rd degree burns

I worked in a kitchen and we'd use milk to put out fires in the deep fryer. Sure there was a legit fire extinguisher but using it would require disinfecting and cleaning up a good portion of the kitchen. And you never want the overhead extinguishers to go off as the mess would require shutting down the entire kitchen.

Yep. Not gonna lie, I felt like I needed a 'tard helmet and find the short bus to ride on.

Here's another one;

>Buy a brand new knife for 15 euros or something
>It's sharp as shit
>Watched a video from gordon ramsay
>Tells you the best way to cut an onion
>Want to practice it
>Cut an onion 'that way'
>Feel a sting
>Slice the tip of my middle finger off
>Starts to bleed
>The tip hangs from my finger just by a little bit of skin
>Push it back on
>Apply bandage with a lot of pressure
>Go to the doctor
>Don't need stitches or anything it'll heal he says
>Now have a middle finger without a finger print

Severed a tendon in my pinky.

It's getting better.

Tried to flip a pancake in mid-air but it kinda stuck to the pan and landed on my unclothed belly.

Apart from that I don't think I've hurt myself beyond the occasional nicked finger.

Randy BoBandy?

>I worked in a kitchen and we'd use milk to put out fires in the deep fryer
Bullshit.
For the purposes of putting out a grease fire, milk is just as awful as water.
If you're too much of a retard to place a lid on the frier, then you shouldn't operate one.

No but thanks. Never know who that guy was before.

>broiler burns

Literally the only time I have ever hurt myself cooking is when I tried to grab something from the oven and accidentally brushed against the broiler.

>hanako goes to Veeky Forums

>microwave something on a plate
>plate explodes as I take it out
tfw too dumb to microwave food

>cooking gumbo
>searing chicken thighs in a cast iron skillet to render fat
>flip thighs over
>smoking hot oil pops somehow, sprays over my face
>had nasty painful burns on the left side of my face for like 2 weeks after
Amazingly, it didn't scar at all. Ever since then I cook the chicken on the rear burner, use long tongs to flip them, and angle my body away from the stove lol

Habeneros are mediocre anyhow. Once you get yourself adapted to that level of spiciness, you realize they taste fruity.

he was more than likely fucking with you cause you incorrectly spelled what you meant to
>mandolin
cool music instrument
>mandoline
julienne cutting tool

> Female sous chef at a small restaurant
> Aiming to be head chef by next year
> Looking to get married on a weekend to my fiancee
> Forget to clean up the grease on the floor
> Caring a huge ass pot filled with boiling water
> trip on the grease comically and fall to the ground
> boiling water scalds my face
> Dont get married

Fast forward 3 years later

> Recover from incident, face is not mangled but still single
> Work as a waiter because of trauma
> Serving a table with a family of four
> Start pouring coffee but accidentally spill some
> Apologize
> Get called a bitch
> Father of the family choke slams me onto the table
> Proceeds to pour scalding coffee on my chest
> Slaps me after
> Cry on the floor as they finish their meal

Canada is a harsh mistress

>be me
>baking apple pie in a springform pan
>after its done, take off the outer part of the form
>bottom of the cake sticks to the base of the form, take huge knife
you know what comes next
>absentminded, I hold against the base with my left hand thumb and indicator finger, cutting towards myself to get the cake off the base

cut myself in the finger as shown in the pic, half a cm deep. Bled all over the place, good times.

Remember, kids: don't be fucking stupid

The same exact thing happened to me a few years ago, except I didn't notice until I was already eating and saw a crispy brown spot on the back of my hand.

Why would you bake a pie in a springform pan? And how the fuck did the pie turn into a cake?

not a native speaker, pardon my French

Sometimes you gotta let the butt of the cucumber go

not mine and not an injury but i haven't seen it posted in forever so here we are

not a native speaker, I made whatever that is, pie or cake

>put on oven mitts
>remove cast iron dutch oven from oven
>open, examine osso bucco
>remember I wanted to add some basil leaves
>remove mits, retrieve leaves
>drop em in
>open oven
>grab dutch oven with my bare hand
>fuck

In boyscouts/cubscouts I would wake up at 4am to start on breakfast for the troop because It was my job and I was good at it.
I had this radical camo raincoat that I would wear everywhere because holy shit it was camo.
I felt so safe that morning drizzle as I lit the grill and started mass producing shitty twelve-year-old's scrambled eggs.
The raincoat was on fire before I even knew it. Stop drop and roll was doing jack shit with whatever fuel this raincoat was made out of, and by the time I took it off my clothes had caught. Resulting in a shrieking lit child running in circles between tents, spilling the propane grill, and eventually jumping into the lake.
I was not a very smart child. Luckily I didn't get any permanent damage.

like this?

Making instant mash in uni. Poured boiling water all over my hand and scalded the fuck out of it

Very not fun

>plate explodes

what was it made of user?

youtube.com/watch?v=iRUSQm5ZskQ

...

>read into hot oven
>forearm grazes top metal edge for less than a second
>burn scar for months
I've done this way too many times

*reach

you are an idiot, put on glove or use those things to take things in and out from oven

>you in charge of reading comprehension
He burned his forearm, oven mitts don't go above the wrist

i pretty much have had that exact same cut from absentmindedly cutting some potatoes, though it was probably only half a centimeter deep

had that with my cast iron shortly after I got it, entire inner side of my hand burnt

>oven mitts don't go above the wrist

lol in what kind of shithole do you live? of course they do

>cooking pasta for +400 people
>water not boiling fast enough
> put on more kettles
> pressure increase
>pour pasta into a strainer
> spill boiling pasta water on -regular- shoes
> burned the top of my feet

>Implying simple water & soap is going to make a difference.

I understood those references

>work at a gastro pub
>Have to prep veggies all morning
>Cutting up heads of broccoli in to this big ass container
>Bored asf so not paying attention
>Feel a sharp pain
>Cut a clean slice of my finger straight off
>Didn't hurt, but bled like a motherfucker

it lasts an annoyingly long time
also this was before I knew not to use cold water/ice on burns and instead to use a damp towel and immediately apply pressure, so it lasted even longer

>Feel a sharp pain
>Didn't hurt
user, you are confused

that looks fucked
[spoiler]did you eat the slice[/spoiler]

Ok, you got me. It was a very short lived pain, no lasting issues after the initial accident

user, he works at a gastro pub. he's clinically retarded.

probably some shit like either of these

grim

kek I understood that reference

habaneros taste like milk. raw habaneros are easily the worst tasting chili in existence and if not for the fact that they can be roasted they would be irredeemable

Yeah basically

>Now have a middle finger without a finger print
You are all set to become a supervillain now, user.

dude go see a doctor. if it was completely severed it will not grow back together by itself. Even if you have surgery there is a chance it may not get completely well again.

What do you use the chicken fat for in gumbo?

The roux. Just add flour and seasonings after the chicken and sausages are done rendering.

Recipe?
Don't care that you'll be using non freedom weights.

I think I've been making gumbo wrong.

It doesn't have to be chicken fat, you can also use lard, bacon drippings, duck fat, etc. But pick something flavorful that matches the type of gumbo you're making instead of using generic flavorless cooking oil.

youtu.be/WbvoOCN3R8M

>making spaghetti and home made cheesy bread from scratch
>everything is going well, sauce is cooking down
>start to make bread
>getting ingredients out and ready
>flour, eggs, butter, cheese all on counter
>open spice cupboard for some salt
>vanilla, cinnamon and nutmeg all fall out
>try to catch them all but critically fail
>vanilla lands in sauce, cinnamon in the flour, nutmeg in the eggs
>eggs tip over
>try to rescue them but slip on the floor, hit the flour and the eggs
>sauce pan tips somehow and splatters all over me and the floor
>flour bowl doing that weird oscillating roll thing bowls can do
>rolls across the edge of the sink and hits the pans drying
>pan falls on head while another pan hits the sink disposal switch
>silverware in the sink slips into the disposal and starts making noise and throwing sparks
>roommate runs into the kitchen just in time to put the fire out on the curtains
>had to go to the hospital with a concussion and burns on my legs and thigh

I still get final destination jokes even though this happened years ago.

>cooking without clothes on
you got what you deserved

Had to cut extra lime wedges for guests after the 4th round of tequila shots and beers in between and I picked my finger pretty deep cuz the knife was kinda dull and I exerted too much strength

I got a burn on the inside of my right arm from accidentally touching my pan

Wear latex gloves you retard or is this just kitchen worker knowledge?

I stuck my finger in a blender once.

It got about 10 small cuts and looked much worse than it actually was. After about five minutes, it stopped bleeding on its own.

He just does every crime with his one middle finger

...i would actually watch that

Burnt myself with a little oil, and cut my finger using a mandolin slicer (fuck those things).

jesus

I don't know, some kind of ceramic

don't blame the tool if you don't know how to use it

Thanks for this thread, this is all gonna stick in my memory and hopefully prevent me from doing some horrible shit to myself.

>not letting your steak hit room temperature first
You deserved it.

That sounds god awful though, do you still have marks on your face?

I don't blame the tool for my fuck up. I was a bit too self-assured, thinking "oh, I won't cut myself". Yeah, I proved myself wrong with that.

So this happened to my leg last month. I spilled boiling ramen noodles on it. Ended up getting infected and I had to see the doctor twice. Burns are no joke friends, stay safe.

why did i click this

Not me but friend:

>Cooking dinner together, we make an awesome baked salmon with brown sugar habanero glaze.
>We start getting a little frisky later and she puts my hand down her pants

The worst I had while cooking is when I was cooking chicken in oil. It popped as usual and a drop landed directly on my nose. Nothing majorly painful since it was a small drop, but it stung for a little afterwards and there was some discoloration on the skin. But I got a fat ugly nose so it's fine, right?

Other thing happened while I was running food at the restaurant I worked at. I foolishly didn't grab a napkin to cover my wrist since I didn't think it was that hot. I get halfway to the table and feel an intense searing in my wrist, but I tough it out because momma didn't raise no bitch. Got a nasty blister afterwards and the discoloration is still there.

>wearing latex gloves in your own kitchen
absolutely cucked desu, as long as your hands are clean you should use bare hands. gloves leach the flavor of whatever the glove is made out of into the food even if only slightly.

I once cut very deeply into my hand meat between my thumb and pointer. Was opening a can of soup and had my fingers positioned in place to stabilize the pull. I saw something white exposed and no'd to the emergency room. Walked up to emergency room desk saying pls repeatedly. Lots of stitches and threw out a couple blood stained rags.

I was making rice pudding and wasn't paying attention to the heat after I stopped stirring for a bit. When I went to go stir it again the whole thing kinda "popped" and sent burning hot milk-starch paste and rice flying, ended up burning the top of my left hand and part of my leg decently.

Sounds like you rube goldberged yourself.

Eugh. Hope you’re feeling better.

>useless fucking garbage
What are you talking about? They managed to delete three of my threads and ban me for a month, all because I posted on-topic material including OC. They're doing a fantastic job of keeping the board safe for McDonald's and Monster Energy Drink shills.

Just wait until you try a hammered dulcimer.