I need to change, i need to find purpose in life, no i think i have a purpose, what i need is to stop being a lazy cunt...

I need to change, i need to find purpose in life, no i think i have a purpose, what i need is to stop being a lazy cunt, how do i do this? any books that will instantly make me think about my pathetic life and make me start changing it?


Also, why do i feel like i'm all over the place and i can't concentrate? any way to fix it?
>inb4 adderal or some shit

This.

Why do I sit around doing literally nothing all day and how
Can I make myself do things?

I blame computers; maybe I should join the army.

Fuck.

just be yourself

But what if I hate myself? What then, you blasted frog?

>be yourself
>didn't fit in my whole childhood
>now that i had a new start i literally try to fit in with normies(and am succeeding)
I have no self, my self is so puny that it's shameful, the only thing i really have that is still the same me since my childhood is VIDEO GAMES which is useless because i don't have enough time to fully enjoy video games, nor do i have the passion anymore.

Give me a book all ready.

just B.E. yourself
B.E. stands for B.E. entirely
and that for B.E. entirely entirely etc.

It's impossible to be anything other than yourself, that's the problem.

You can craft a mask, particularly with the right blend of narcotics. Then you just have to experience what happens when you dip the mask, once or twice, and you'll never make that mistake again. Then you'll realize that everyone wears a mask, and you were only autistic because nobody let you in on the gag.

Start working out. Seriously. Get your life into a reasonable schedule that you can elevate later into maximum efficiency.

And stop trying to read a shitton at once-- start at one chapter a day and see how it goes.

(read the greeks)

You say you need to change, OP... I know just what you need.

All masks are contributory to the wearer and come from within rather than from without.

this desu
greeks and lifting is patrician
postmodernity and idleness isn't

jokes on you, i actually posted the same thing on fit because i got fit and like my body, but the emptiness is still here.

give me a book.

When I got to college I was 270 lbs and """smart""", """ironic"""-- but now I'm swole and actually well-read.

You will be astounded on how much the Greeks still influence works in our modern era. You'll get more out of every work you read.

That's a personal problem, user. After fixing your outsides, work on your insides. Look in yourself and figure out what makes you empty. Then find a book about that thing. I can't recommend you a book that will make you introspective.

holy fuck i'm gonna use this in my book.

CAN SOMEONE POST SOME BOOKS ON FINDING DRIVE PLEASE

Don't hate yourself.

You ned to go to therapy user.

Simply deciding you have to have a mission is just going to stress you out and make you give up all over again. Get well adjusted.

I listen to dramatic readings of the Iliad/aeneis while lifting, am I patrician yet?

i refuse to believe it

And i have a mission, i lack drive, i could do the thing right now, and i really wanna, but i just can't do it because it takes effort and time.

Why are you asking for drive if you don't think you have mental health problems? If you don't why wouldn't you just do the "important" thing.

i don't think being lazy is a mental problem
even if it is, what are they gonna say? just like do the thing?

I wrote a book. That was nearly a year ago. I have since written 5 additional books and I have another one about a third finished and I have a start on like 4 or 5 others.

Try writing a book. It might just become an obsession. I've made around $140 so far. Things can indeed be a bit slow when self-publishing, but at the rate I'm going, I think I'll manage to be a full-time writer in less than 2 years. I made almost nothing for about 4-4.5 months, then things started to pick up in mid-March. I made the vast majority of that $140 in about 100 days. Paid over a dollar a day to write, which is something I already love doing? Fuck yeah, it's like getting paid to play fucking videogames.

I remember being depressed when in high school and even later in life when I found myself in something of a rut due to a variety of issues, the law being one of them. Purpose. It's all I wanted. Purpose. I've found mine, I think. Used to think it was Military.

/fitlit/ much? Also, noice. I used to be 270-280lb as well. I haven't weighed myself in months but I think I'm around 230lb now, maybe 240lb tops. Did some push-ups recently and got over 15 so I'm not doing too bad physically even though I'm still overweight. Dunno if I want to be 'swole', certainly not muscular, but I do want to be strong. I like having a gut though. Don't like the look of buff/toned dudes. To each their own, though.

Then be less like yourself. Try new things.

What do you think depression is? It doesn't mean being sad.

that is actually the thing i wanna do, write books, stories, backgrounds, and i did start writing.
I wrote 2 pages so far, edited them quite a few times because it seemed boring.
but i just can't do it, i sit here in the dark, shitposting on Veeky Forums while waiting for someone to push me on Veeky Forums.

I wanted to try this but I have zero experience with professional writing. Any tips? How much do you write a day? I know I'm tempting the old adage, "The blind leading the blind," but, hey, you never know.

unironically, clean your room.

>Always keep my room tidy.
>Rarely make a mess in the first place.
>Still unmotivated as fuck.
Doesn't really help those of us who are naturally neat.

You should finish writing before you start editing, just saying. There'll be plenty of time to edit once you actually have your book started and finished. I actually wrote my 77,000 word first-draft in... what... 5 days? Absolutely ridiculous, I know, but I just got entirely engrossed in it. Hours and hours and hours a day I'd write until it was finished. I'd wake up in the morning, get my coffee, but before I even got that I'd be looking forward to writing. Over half a decade I had been wanting to write a book in a specific genre and I finally did it. I then actually started writing the sequel before I did any editing, and got, what was it, 40,000 words into it before finally I stopped writing and started editing? Anyways, edited for over a month, self-published after another 1.5 drafts, but turns out there were flaws inherent in my writing that I didn't even know about so had to edit it AGAIN!

All in all, if you include the initial writing process, I've read that first book 3.5 times... quite sick of it at this point and probably won't read it again for many, many years. Anyways, you'll never get that book JUST the way you want it, and you shouldn't judge it as boring. You're your own worst critic, often times, so if you want someone's opinion then GET someone's opinion. Join CreateSpace, they have a forum, and they often do things like that. Critiquing and what not. Anyways, don't edit. Just write until that story is finished.

Oh, also, I just wrote over 1000 more words today. Over 2000 so far, very productive day, feels outstanding.

wait i didnt post this.
we're the lost youth of this generation, at least we arent all crack heads driving around US of A

I had zero experience with professional writing too when I started, though I had been doing unprofessional/hobby writing for many years up until I started on books. I've learned lots of tips, don't really know where to start. I typically write 1500 words a day, or at least I did. Had a month and a half of pretty severe writer's block but i seem to be finally past it. Averaging 1000 words a day for the past 4 days though today I got over 2000 words as mentioned. The format thing that I use seems to have around 300-350 words per page, basically a 5x8" format once it's put to paperback. So it seems I used to average 4-5 pages a day, lately more like 3 pages a day though today I got about 5-6 pages. Doesn't Stephen King write 500 words a day, or something like that? It adds up quick, user! I have a VERY fast typing speed though, so when the thoughts are steady coming I rattle off words like a friggin PPSh-41 SMG! Huh, I wonder if I can truly type 1000 keystrokes per minute... that sounds a BIT fast, even after a couple cups of coffee. Probably more like an M1918A2 BAR on 'slow auto' with around 350 keystrokes per minute, or an MP40 at around 550 a minute.

I'm still learning, there's a MASSIVE learning curve in self-publishing, but it's probably more like "The borderline-alcohol-poisoned drunk leading the blind." Not much better than the blind leading the blind, but a little bit. Any specific tips you want? I might have something to pass on; been writing books for nearly a year now and been self-published for over 8 months. I've learned much in this brief time and I know there's much to learn yet. I look forward to it, this has been and still is a fascinating process. Gonna be great to finish this 7th book and be the proud self-published author of a quadrilogy.

get into virtue ethics

there is no easy, instant way out. To be better you gotta think better and act better first. It's a gradual process but you can change.

Looking for this?

Anyway, I don't know what to tell you OP beyond I know that feel.

this except I have shit genes and am not allowed to join the military

what you mean to say is that you need to delude yourself there is some telos to your existence because, unfortunately, you already exist.

I found happiness staying single,(believe me when I say that being in a relationship is only a hindrance on what you wish to do with your life) generally avoiding technology and only using such scarcely, reading in the times I'd usually be using technology, and staying active. I know it sounds like a meme, but when you feel your life is empty it is because of lapses in perpetual motion, and then you begin to get all introspective. Even if you've been through some major trauma, it's the same negative thoughts recycling within you. No book, which is totally lodged in abstracts, is going to help. You need to improve what you do and how you do it. Get some self-control in an age that has none.

>I listen to words I ought to be reading

No

How do you get from knowing what happens to actual prose? I think I read too much history. I end up writing a history of my novel instead of the actual novel.