Woke up to some Steve and now I want some MREs for breakfast

Woke up to some Steve and now I want some MREs for breakfast.

Post anything MRE related. Stories or tips. Ive never had this MRE so I'm excited. Also why are there so many taco MREs now?

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youtube.com/watch?v=Db19pT9lnZc
theepicenter.com/mre-meals-ready-to-eat/mre-sauces-spreads.html
twitter.com/SFWRedditVideos

Looks good

Candy alert

Just pulled this out of my Jeep so the peanut butter is frozen. Strangely enough, the applesauce isn't frozen. Excited for the smoked almonds.

Gonna fix this peanut butter issue real fast.

Apple sauce time. Its really really sweet but not too much.

Accessory packet came with a new type of hot sauce. Its not Tabasco or the chili sauce that usually comes in MREs. Hopefully the lime is a good addition.

Almonds

Dusty but so good.

This thing sucks.

Cappuccino time, smells good.

Crackers didn't break into a million pieces. Look at those corners.

Unironically good post.

Nice.

PB is ready, kinda oily.

Good, kinda crumbly.

Nice.

What's a poop like after this?

Lets try this oatmeal cookie with chocolate chunk.

Already in a million pieces. Don't think Ive ever had an intact one.

Just chew the gum user.

This thing is making a mess.

Poops are fine. Any anecdotes about how they give you constipation or diarrhea is from guys that were forced to eat nothing but MREs for days on end.

Water done heating.

Cappuccino is good, now for this stuff. Definitely smells taco-y.

I don't know if you can tell but there are black beans in there. It has a little bit of spice to it but the overall taste is "MRE taste" the chili sauce really helps it.

Thats everything. Im pretty full now.

No hiss?

The crackers had a little bit of a hiss to them.

Nice.

Nice.

Nice.

Nice.

Didn't have a FRH in it, which was not nice

I never use the FRH, I just heat up entrees in a pot of water on the stove. I get duds way too often.

Nice.

alright

Can you get Veeky Forums eating nothing but MREs? Asking for a friend

These days mre's are pretty much just filled with random shit you can get at any store.

How dare OP not put the stuff on a tray.

>not on a tray

not full nice

Eating MREs is also fine until you have to eat it for three months straight

During sandy, my workplace (a university) hosted some mentally ill that were displaced by the hurricane. There were crates of humanitarian rations all over the first floor. I had lunch with one our telecom guys who volunteered to be emergency on-site support for that week (basically sleep at work, take care of any phone VOIP problems the OEM guys are having). It wasn't bad, but I couldn't imagine eating this stuff for a week.

Why the fuck would you actually want to eat these? I hated surviving off of those fucking things for months on end.

>be me
>hiking in Montana
>packed MREs for 5 day hike
>bought 15 pack of MREs online a week before trip
>only need 6-7 for trip
>eat MREs for 3 days leading up to hike
>ham slice for days
>day of hike
>halfway up 7 mile mountain trail
>tummyrumble.jpg
>peel of main trail
>shit for 30+ minutes
>shit is thick as hell
>asshole caked in what has the consistency of dank brownie batter
>exhaust 5 day supply of wet wipes in one shit
>stillnotclean.gif
>use spare shirt to finish
>mfw even after the shirt I'm still not 100% clean
>spend 5 days with a dirty ass alone in the woods
>gnats follow me like Pigpen from Charlie Brown

4/10 would consider doing again desu

Are you Steve?

Because they're a novelty to civilians, partly in due to Murrikan military worship.
p.s. tangs 4 ur cervix

Take the MRE pack, unopened, and place it in a waste receptacle.

Purchase and consume some food.

yes.

I don't eat the shit ones you got in the service, that stuff is gas-station tier food. I buy stuff like mountain house when I go camping and in the winter, I bring real food.

Aside from including things to make making what's included easier to make in the wilderness I can get cheaper and better food from the dollar store.

>the edit in steves last video where he cut himself off
I laughed so hard

This. Warning to everybody who’s never had to live on MREs, you have to hydrate like Aquaman or bad things will happen.

>make making what's included easier to make

When I was
a young boy
My friends and I were super into army shit, and we went camping all the time. I had an ALICE pack, and a mess kit. Whenever we ate camping food we'd put it in our mess kits, was p cool. And we often ate MREs. It was awhile back so we had the dark brown packs from the late 80's/early 90's, and then the ones with the non-flame heating packs. Was pretty cool as a kid, we'd also get dressed in BDUs and play manhunt in large patches of woods at night. Damn now I want to do all that again but I don't have any friends left that would be into it, having moved to the city. Anyway good thread and I was pleasantly surprised to find steve, super nostalgic.

>gnats follow me like Pigpen from Charlie Brown

Include items to facilitate the preparation of other items.

maybe because you're not using it correctly

Better.

Anybody have that post from /k/ about that guy that broke up with a girl and made her a final dinner entirely out of MREs that was about 9000+ calories and she called him up the next day because she couldnt stop shitting wet thick cookie dough

I need this someone please help this user.

Why don't MREs contain condoms or jerk off lube?

Has there ever been an MRE Steve hated?

...

god damn it you guys are gonna make me buy another random pull lot off of ebay, I need more jalapeno cheese spread in my life

Usually the oldest ones.

Because most people in the world aren't circumcised and as such, do not require lube to masturbate.
Condoms are usually handed out.

Well, I guess I should rephrase that to refer to the modern ones, he usually seems to enjoy all of them. Even the IDF one with a shit ton of tuna he still said was just meh.

There's one he did fairly recently that was completely rancid and he basically had labeled it an "outtake" because he had to throw the whole thing out, but I'm having trouble finding it

mmkay, let's put this into a tray... wait, you didn't put it into a tray. Are you even trying?

Because only people with jewslave dicks need lube to jerk it.

youtube.com/watch?v=Db19pT9lnZc

Dude if you are out in the field you are going to get sweaty cock. It is hard as fuck to jerk it with sweaty cock that gives you too much grip

Not if you have foreskin, you dumbfuck.
That's the point.

YES that's the one, I knew it was Polish, thanks man

You can masturbate without lube, the skin still moves, it's not like you're chafing it

That's what I just said.

american MREs are for subhumans

Nice!

Steve has eaten so much disgusting shit and called it decent. You gotta imagine how bad this had to fucking smell to make him stumble and heave like that.

I dont have a tray.
I had it proped up and in the cardboard sleeve but the heat wasnt getting to where it needed to be. When I laid it flat like that the water got to it a bit better and I was good to go.

>poland

Trays are kind of expensive, unless they're shitty replicas. The old stainless steel kind like Steve has cost a solid $50 off of eBay.

How have I not seen this? That's fucking hilarious the way it got him in the end, he seemed fine when he was shaking the pouch with the water in it.

His recent 2013 French one he didn't seem to care for. Granted it was all bars and crackers and he cobbled together that porridge, but about the only redeeming quality to it was the gel.

Some soldier is right now sitting in his half dug fighting pit in the rain at 3am taking 2 minutes to suck down a cold ration meal before going on stag for 3 hours staring at nothing then going back to digging until first light and orders for that morning's patrol of some shitty exercise.

best mre's
>chicken pesto pasta, main meal is by far the best tasting and most palatable
>anything with a "tomato sauce", eg ravioli or spaghetti with meat sauce
>shredded beef in barbecue sauce
>chicken chunks or tuna chunks in water

mediocre mre's
>any kind of pasta dish or "stew"

shit tier mre's
>anything patty

if you're in the field and you got a patty mre, you are fucked. no one would trade for that shit. all it's good for is staving off hunger and maybe the skittles.

Nice.

British MREs are better

>British MREs
They're called ORPs, user.

Did Steve get more ripped?

He is growing stronger

>loved first 3 cheese spread packets
>refused to eat it for several years
>become addicted to cheese spread. collected it. my mentality "spread" and it became a commodity.
>tfw paying $5.19 for easy cheese at grocery store now

also bacon cheese spread is poison, jalapeno is good, and original is the best. that is strictly personal taste

Had some as kid while parents were military. I liked the beefstew and dehydrated pears the best. Also u could take the heat packs and blow shit up.

I live in st thomas virgin Islands and lived through both cat5 storms and these things have been breakfast and dinner for the first month and a half after the storms lol

I demand that someone posts it.

You can buy individual cheese spread packets for about .99c a piece....


theepicenter.com/mre-meals-ready-to-eat/mre-sauces-spreads.html

I used to love chicken tomato with feta cheese. But its gone now.