I just dont give a fuck anymore

I just dont give a fuck anymore
Every novel seems like children entertainment to me
All the drama is childish, the comedy is only funny in the literary context, characters are all the same person
Those awe inspiring passages vanish in nothingness

There is nothing to be said anymore. No more words, is over. No more literature

There are so many books I've loved, but I fail to see anything authentic in them now

What are we trying to make out of this
I wish I could be a plant with just one eye and just contemplate

For some reason, the only thing that makes sense to me is the idea of staying still with my eyes out of focus, and I don't know why

What is happening to me, I've been really depressed before, I'm talking the real deal
Now I'm not even confused
I can't even put it into words

What should I do? I really try to tell myself over and over again that life has a meaning, that I should do something, but I don't feel any kind of impulse

Is all air

soon you're going to be sober, and then you're going to be bored, and then you'll unnerstand, again, why

>Is all air
No, everything is water.

read non fiction for a while. use books for learning.

Water, you say?

Then stop reading novels and drama then, there's more to literature than just those two.
Why don't you go to see one of these drama's at a theatre?
Read poetry?

*clears throat*

I'm sober
Learn what
I read history and philosophy
Is literally nothing
I'm sorry, but I can’t
Is just time passing through me. Stealing me

Where even am I, everything seems so far, so detached

This

>all these brainlets pretending to be wisened lifelong readers

lmao baby couldn't get through Dubliners and decided to throw in the tower

Perhaps the problem is that you're reading books in english when you should be reading them in your mother tongue?

My favorite book is Don Quixote
It was my gateway to literature
I always have it along my bed
But I don't feel I'm being requested by it
The books, the music I love, they just left me behind

>The books, the music I love, they just left me behind
Same thing happened to my dad and I found him hanging from the balcony two months later.
Get yourself checked dude.

If you're that bored look into spirituality and mysticism. That shit should be entertaining.

sounds like another form of depression desu

I'm already on meds
Last year was hell on earth, something changed

Pray, OP. Whether you believe or not. Be sincere and alone

just shoot some heroin then

I just ate my last 0.5mg of clonazepam
I don't have opis

I really don't know what to do
I can't even cry
I just want a hug, I tried to reach out and ask some friends to hang out but they are all busy

This is going nowhere, I'm stuck
Is not even sadness

you need nonfiction

huh, those are quite the options

Nevermind I'm feeling good now
Lithium doesn't always work

yeah but at least quixote will always be good

Where do you live? I'll help

I'm fine thanks

Cuck

Eventually you will tire of this attitude. There will be no epiphany. This is it. You will realize that the older and simpler folks that you think are blissfully unaware, that have vapid interests and don't share your contemplative nature, are just bored of intellectually critiquing everything. It gets old, like anything else intriguing. Life is life, we all experience it similarly regardless of how much time you spend submerged in abstractions. At the end of the day you've got to come back up to face reality. And here we are. You'll grow beyond it, get lost in this or that pursuit, and come back to it in a new form. It's somewhat cyclical. Gradually it fades. Good luck

this isn't reality

See, don't blame literature for your depression. You can delet this thread now.

I'm still on a break up with literature
After reading Dosto, Joyce, Cervantes, Shakespeare, Pynchon, Stendhal, Lezama Lima, Bolaño, Borges, and others I dont remember right now. I just dont see what else could hypnotice me like those

Literature feels like a scam now