Just got one of these for christmas. I need your best recipes, Veeky Forums

Just got one of these for christmas. I need your best recipes, Veeky Forums

onion, water, pork shoulder. Add your favorite spices.

We have one of these threads every 48 hours. Just google ‘slow cooker recipes’ (as if you’re not a dickhead memester).

Jezus fuck, every 24 hours a new thread with 20 replies max.

Am I the only one who thinks that everything that comes out of a crockpot is shit?

You can add beer instead of water.
UMA

>1 lb pinto beans
>2 or 3 smoked ham hocks
>yellow onion...as much or as little as you like
>jalapeño...as much or as little as you like
>cilantro...as much or as little as you like
>garlic...as much or as little as you like
>salt and pepper each layer
>chicken broth
>8 hours on high
>bestmotherfuckenbeans.exe

I'm sure there are other retards like you

Corned beef with Guinness extra Stout. One or two pints. Cook for 6-8 hours then add cabbage. Then mix sour cream with horseradish and used as dipping sauce.

Enjoy

I make crockpot oatmeal all the time. It's a way I can ensure my gf starts the day with a healthy meal cause the bitch don't cook.

1 cup oats
2 cups water
1 tsp salt
add dried fruit, banana, apples, raisins, cinnamon, or anything else you'd like to flavor it with, anything besides sugar.
Cook in crock pot on low for 6-8 hours. spoon into bowl and add milk and sugar to your liking.

Fuck ya charro beans! Staple of delcious tex mex food. I recommend adding some cumin seed as well, diced tomatoes are fine too (I tend to use Rotel).

Put stuff in pot.
Turn on pot.
Go to sleep.
Wake up.
Eat.
That's literally the only recipe you need.

French onion soup
>2 Spanish onions, sliced thinly
>2 cloves garlic, minced
>caramalize that shit in 4 tbs butter for 15 minutes
>toss in crock pot, add 5 cups hot water set to high
>add 5 bullion cubes and 2 tbs of Worcester sauce. Cook on high 1 hour
>get sliced bread, toast that shit or use crackers
>get any cheese, put on top of bread or put pulverized crackers on top cheese.
>put the bread/cheese or cheese/cracker on top of soup
>>chow da fuck down

Its really motha fuckin savory and if you're broke its really really fucking cheap and impossible to fuck up.

Chili
>brown .5 lbs ground 90/10 sirloin and .5 lbs ground Italian sausage
>put meat in crock pot but leave as much fat in skillet as possible. Mince 1 yellow onion and 4 cloves garlic, saute that shit for 10 minutes. Toss in croc pot
>toss in 2 cans of diced fire roasted tomatoes, 1 can drained kidney beans, 1 can drained pinto beans, 1 16 oz guiness, 8th cup Worcester, 2 tbs cayenne, 2 tbs pepper, 2 tbs salt, 2 tbs cumin, and if you hate everyone in your family like I do a loogie that built up while chopping onions.
>cook on high for 20 minutes for all flavors to come together then low cook for 1 hour 40 minutes.
>serve that shit in a mug with shredded mozzarella and cheddar on top with some crushed cracker.

Hearty as fuck and is the bomb fucking diggity during winter months.

You sound like a working class chump. I bet you thought it would be a great "investment", how you would wake up to a warm, healthy breakfast to start off your long day. Maybe, you even had a couple thoughts about all the other nifty little uses you could find for the thing, how it would help you cook healthier meals in general, shed a couple pounds off the old gut, boost your confidence around work and with the ladies. Yeah, maybe that slow cooker would start your life cooking again, wouldn't it? I can see your strained hands holding the box and reading through it carefully at the store. A little bit pricey, but you're the type of guy who thinks everything is more than you can spend, aren't you. And look what happened to you. Look what the slow cooker did to you. Fucked you over, and made you clean it like a useless bitch. You don't even fucking like oatmeal. Piece of shit, you've been repeating those three words your whole life, haven't you. Yeah, how was work after that piece of shit fucked you over? I bet it was on your mind the whole day, you probably didn't say shit to nobody. Can't be telling people about your mistakes. How your little fix yourself plan, failed you. Don't want people to start thinking you're the failure. You're the piece of shit, all along. You don't want that do you? You don't want to be the piece of shit everybody secretly whispers about, do you? Was your father a piece of shit like you? I bet he never had a slow cooker. He had a woman, a house, a damn good job. I bet it's slow cooking you the fuck alive, isn't it. Comparing yourself to him. How one day when all the steam runs our of your life, you'll discover how you're nothing more than burnt shit to be scrapped off and thrown in the trash.

Someones projecting.

It’s pasta, newfag.

Normally I can't stand crock pot cooked food a trick I learned to not make it, so bad was to replace the plain water with some kind of stock. It makes pork roast a lot better.

apple cider vinegar and water (equal parts) is also delicous for pulled pork

You can't caramelize onions in 15 minutes unless your onion is thin as shit and you're using super high heat (like from a commercial wok burner) or something. And the flavor will be different than slowly carmelized onions.

nice

>spanish onions
wouldn't that make it spanish onion soup

I-it was a present...

Old pasta

>5 bullion cubes

How am I supposed to get 5 billion cubes

brown meat, add it later in the cooking

Can you make patsta in a slowcooker?

You can. Slow cooker mac & cheese is really good.

Makin a top round rn

i;m thinkin about thos beans