How does Veeky Forums take their coffee?

Black. Two creams two sugars if the coffee is terrible.

I French press some coffee, put in a little sugar and a little milk to take the edge off.

But coffee isn't considered an intellectual drink. That would be bourbon or something.

Too much caffeine, makes me shit and piss for hours. Tea is perfect.

French Market only, and one packet of artificial sweetener. And a vial of bourbon.

Black tea. No sugar or milk. The one and only way to drink

I don't drink coffee. The smell of it makes me nauseous. No idea how you weirdos can drink it.

french press with milk. sugar seems to fuck up the flavor, but milk adds a wonderful creaminess and helps calm the acidity of french press coffee.

now all i drink is chai with lots of milk and sugar though desu

I sip coffee from early in the morning to mid-afternoon, and I make it with a Moka pot. The only thing I add is some ice to cool it down and dilute it since I don't (usually) want to over caffeinate myself

>he sweetens his coffee or tea
you need to be 18 to post here

I can't believe that everyone is actually talking about coffee and not the mug. OP tried to bait us and failed miserably. This is hilarious

>two spoonfuls of honey
that's a lot of honey my man

i drink it black like you're supposed to
preferably as a 12oz pourover

what's your favorite coffee region Veeky Forums? ethiopia and kenya for me

instant coffee, lukewarm water, no sugar no cream

>latte
>black
yeah ok buddy

Ginseng coffee in the morning while browsing Veeky Forums. It has been a habit o'mine for something like a year.

Plus 3 espressos spread throughout the day.

Balzac and Sartre drank hella coffee. Eventually Sartre found it more expedient to smoke meth.

I like my coffee like I like my women

>imported beans
>cheap grinder

You fool. Tell me it is at least a burr grinder.

Btw all beans are imported unless you live in Sumatra, etc.

>he thinks I meant one drink

>90% of the time just black
>10% of the time with cream and a tiny bit of sugar, and I dunk a muffin bottom in it and eat the muffin bottom, then eat the muffin top like a cookie, and everyone in the coffee shop looks at me like I just invented the wheel

I hate milk and sugar in coffee. Black is the only way to go. French press if available. Straight espresso is for people who've given up on life though.

you've just never had a quality shot of espresso. protip: starbucks scalds the shit out of their shots and pulls them in the laziest, easiest-to-mass-produce way possible, so they basically never taste good. it's all up to how the machine is operating and most of them are pulling hundreds of shots a day through the same dirty tubes.

find a local coffee shop with a single-origin available for espresso and your world will change forever

3 parts coffee, 1 part whiskey.

Thread theme
youtube.com/watch?v=VQzT09BgeWY

Tea >>> coffee

Folgers with a splash of whipped cream, milk or cream, basically whatever I have in the fridge at the time.

Black as midnight on a moonless night heh

With sugar free pancake syrup and a splash of milk. black if I can afford good stuff

I drink Maxwell House original roast black, 4-6 cups a day.

It tastes fine because I'm not a snob, and it keeps me awake.

An aside question, does anyone know if there are legal issues with translating a book for personal use? I'm learning a pretty unknown language that's primarily spoken for work, so there's very little in the way of literature, and I thought it might be a fun project to translate a few books from English to Pashto.

>Folgers
True patricians drink Maxwell House, pleb.

Bourbon

Either a kiwi or have done time in new zzz..

>makes me..
nauseates (you) rather. A common error.

>harpsichord
my ears!!

zimbabwe

Not doubting you, but can you explain why "makes me nauseous" is incorrect?

Fuck anyone who puts sugar or any kind of sweetener in their coffee. If someone tells you they take sugar in their coffee, let them know that they're making a big mistake and then shut off contact with them. Cream only, black, or nothing.

I am a barista, you faggot. I definitely don't drink Starbucks.

BLACKED?

Black tea is the patrician's choice. Without sugar and milk for hard business, with milk and a half spoonful of sugar (better if brown sugar) for comfy books

Nescafé. Without milk. Without sugar.
Thanks for ask.

>Straight espresso is for people who've given up on life though.
This is accurate, I drink straight espresso almost exclusively.

Yes!

you're a shitty barista if you don't like espresso

>Tea
>tea
>Tea
>tea

Fags

i drink all coffee black, even shitty coffee

I usually rip half a page from Infinite Jest, put it in the coffee and let it dissolve for a while. Then I add sugar and drink it.

I'm an excellent barista. I just don't care for straight espresso. I know literally 1 barista who likes it, and he's pretty mediocre. You clearly never worked in a cafe.

i work at one now with nine coworkers. we all drink espresso because we actually make it right

What it means is that (you) make others sick (BECOME nauseating=nauseous) not that (you) are made dizzy or sick yourself, which is what I supposed was meant.
If she's noxious, she's poison. If she has a nauseous personality (you) can't be around her without wanting to vomit.

You've never tasted my espresso. I serve it straight to dead-eyed losers like you all the time, and they love it. Like I said, I just don't care for the taste.

>thinks he serves good espresso
>doesn't like the taste of it himself
protip: that means it's bad

...

>two tablespoons of coconut oil
>1 teaspoon of cocoa powder
>blended for 30 secs

you want comfy in a cup? make this

Okay faggot, keep thinking people who don't like the same food as you have bad taste, or "just haven't had the good stuff." Your logic is facile on a surface level, and you're also working under the assumption I've only tried my own, or my cafe's espresso, which isn't the case. I'm glad you feel superior for liking a bitter drink 90% of people hate though.

The above was my post as well. The only persons I've ever met who dropped honey in their coffee were New Zealanders. Is this common in your neck of the woods as well?

i had espresso once.
it tasted like someone punched me in the stomach.

if you like coffee you should be able to appreciate a quality shot of espresso. if it tastes bitter to you, it's because you're not using a very good machine, or not using very good coffee, or just not doing a very good job. it's okay, the vast majority of cafes pull shitty shots and accept it because it's a very common misconception that espresso just tastes bitter by default.

if you're using a high quality machine, hand tamping properly, and sourcing good beans, it should not be bitter, but in fact quite sweet

Stop ruining coffee with your shit. Honey only belongs in tea or special-occasion coffee (something brewed on the stove with spices and fruits and such).

We'll just have to agree to disagree. I can only use my word to vouch for my own ability. I can assure we source good beans though.

I'm not him, but seriously fuck off. You are so far up your own ass it's honestly painful. Nobody gives a shit what kind of coffee you stick your dick in.

t. children who have never had good coffee or taken the time to learn how to prepare coffee
No, nothing you'll find at a supermarket is good. You'll either have to order it or get it from a roaster. It will cost anywhere from 3x to 10x the price of supermarket trash and will likely list all of the details, including origin, production, roast, etc.

Good coffee generally has a lot less caffeine too because it's bred for flavor. I make my coffee very strong and it doesn't affect me much, but whenever I drink coffee somewhere else, it almost gives me a headache.

>care about and enjoy what i do
>some rando calls me a faggot for it
if you don't give a shit why are you reading

Coffee and espresso are not fucking bitter. Cheap beans make bitter coffees, burnt beans make bitter coffees, scalded grounds make bitter coffees. Unless you're a fr*nch faggot using roasted beans instead of something medium or light roasted, and it is done properly, then it will not be bitter.

Did you mean to respond to someone else?

My provider has only began to expand their partnerships to Africa, so I haven't had a chance to try anything but Ethiopian. They should have some from the Congo soon, though, according to their blog.

They focus on Latin America, the best they've sent me has always been from Guatemala.
I brew with a french press and relatively cool water for a longer time (5-6 minutes). I prefer how light and sweet it comes out that way, plus I don't have to wait for it to cool. About 4-5 tablespoons of beans to 2 cups of water.

>Coffee and espresso are not fucking bitter
Maybe not to you. Taste is relative. I think even regular coffee with just milk is a bit bitter. I prefer tea.

Black with nothing.

Don't be too upset, I call everyone a faggot. It's good that you enjoy your job. I just don't think you should assume people haven't had good espresso, just because they don't like it.

I always have coffee when I watch radar.

No, taste is not relative, you just make bad coffee and espresso.

Thought
>Zimbabwe
was intended to answer the post above the one it is actually fixed to, in which case it would make sense. Regardless, it responds to my second post (below it) although I'm not sure how.

I'm not the barista. I've never made expressos.

Hence why you think coffee is bitter.

I think you're bitter. Lay off the espresso.

Tea. Two sugars. Milk.

you caught me, I buy $10 bags of beans at the grocery store and have no idea about different grinders

...

>Can get consistent quality without going all autismo about it or buying expensive appliances
>doesn't fuck up your health
>near infinite varieties
>is drank for pleasure rather than as a crutch for people with bad metabolisms
I enjoy a good cup of coffee on occasion but if I had to choose between the two it wouldn't even be a question.

A Ristretto from a good mexican grain.

Zimbabwe is from a meme making fun of Sheldon Cooper's "Bazinga" with words that have the same cadence. I did this because there's a episode where he corrects someone for saying he was nauseous when he really meant nauseated.
You guys do watch the BBT, right?

keked
You're right.

I don't drink espresso straight very often just because it is difficult to get right. I might spike my own coffee with a shot, though.

Coffee is very easy to make consistent, is very good for you, has just as many varieties, and is very pleasurable.

Eat shit and die.

>expensive appliances
Forgot this point. I use the cheapest Bodom press (about $25) and a equally cheap burr grinder. $50 is 'expensive' now? The cheapest drip coffee machines cost that much, idiot, and don't even last as long.

Coffee I bought from Starbucks that's been in my cabinet for a while, with a shitty electric grinder, and a cheap French press. Black.

You could just scroll up and see for yourselves the degenerate autism that one has to stoop to for a "correct" cup of coffee.

High caffeine is really really bad for you tho

black usually, 2 cream if it's shit coffee like mcdonalds