How do i eat eggs without getting runny yolk all over me and my clothes if I am wearing some

how do i eat eggs without getting runny yolk all over me and my clothes if I am wearing some.

Cook it properly?

I can't eat saucy spaghetti without staining my mouth like a toddler.

same here

>eating saucy spaghetti

stop liking things I am not fond of

eat the whole egg at once (with eggshell still on, thats digestable).
Also you might want to cook the egg before that, but it's optional

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getting yolk all over your face is best part, ya dirty girl you

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Eat like a normal person?

my gf has this problem too with all foods. Fucking retards can't figure out how to bring your head over your plate when taking a bite. If anything falls it will land on the plate and not your clothes

Are you me? My girl friend has the same exact issue. Fucking food and mess everywhere when she eats.

I don't think you people have actually eaten eggs

use a straw

My mate has a gf with this exact same problem. She can't seem to eat, well, anything really without making a huge fucking mess of herself. Lads, are women human?

For real? Are you guys me???
My uncle's retarded foster child has a gf who does exactly the same!

t. Toasty Roastie

this

Is this bait?

>wearing clothes
>when eating

The fuck is wrong with you people?

either way the egg is getting on you and I'd rather it on my clothes

Eat over your plate? Sit forward like a human being.

I don't really have plates, the disposable ones are like nine dollars it'd be cheaper to buy plates and break them but I'm too lazy to always be breaking plates. I do have a bowl though, but it's not so great for eggs.

Why would you prefer it on your clothes? People actually see your clothes when you get out of bed, but if just on your body you can wipe it off and still go out without taking a shower because you're wearing clothes not stained with whatever disgusting shit you eat in bed.

no one sees me and clothes can go in a washing machine but I can't and I don't like being sticky and I don't eat in bed I'm not a gremlin

Gremlins aren't supposed to eat after midnight, though.

who is this semen demon?

move your head forward so your mouth is over the plate if you are worried your food will spill

this is first grade stuff

it's time for people who don't understand eggs to begone