Tfw going to Golden Corral breakfast for the first time tomorrow morning

This is basically sunken cost fallacy. You're spending the same amount of money no matter what. You should just eat what you would enjoy the most.

reminds me of when my gran took us to museums, we had to stay all day to get our money's worth even if we were all tired and sick of looking at shit on the walls

Don't

STOP
ME
NOW

>You should just eat what you would enjoy the most.
You are assuming that what I enjoy most is not trying to gorge myself on the most expensive stuff they have. I consider it a challenge.
I admittedly almost never go to buffets though. I'm Veeky Forums and like smaller portions of healthy food.
Put me in a buffet though, and it is game on.

cringe

Cringe

sit in a corner and just observe

here's some motivation
pjwnex.us/media/text/Golden_Corral.txt

Why all the Golden Corral hate? Golden Corral is honestly better than a fucking movie.

I have a friend named Bruce. Bruce looks to be some kind of honest-to-God pirate at first
glance, and I mean Captain Jack Sparrow's crew pirate, and the ornery, mean old fucking pirate
you'd never, ever want to mess with because he'd bite your God-damned nose off and eat it. He's
also wildly into K-pop, choreographs his own dance routines to it, and in the last year or two
has started just basically eating like a Korean, which apparently means shitloads of vegetables
and cabbage. Anyway, Bruce goes to Golden Corral like 2x a week, which I thought was kind of strange
due to his new health kick, so finally I asked him about it.

"Dude," he said. "Golden Corral has a shitload of vegetables, and their cabbage is great. But
you're missing the point. You don't go to Golden Corral just for the food. It's fucking dinner theater."

And you know what? He's right. For $12 you can sit and watch some of the most hilarious, downright
hellishly gluttonous behavior you will see outside the Plane of Fat in the Demonic Abyss. I went with
him one time and laughed so hard at some of the shit on display that now I go with him about once a
month, get a big plate of steak and another big plate of salad, stake out a spot where you can see
most of the buffets (and oh for fucking sure the CHOCOLATE WONDERFALL) and just observe the kind of
unbelievably self-indulgent (and self-destructive) shit that would make a European or Southeast Asian's
person head explode off their shoulders in horror and make someone with a "sick sad world" sense of
humor laugh their ass off.

Someone, say, like me.

For example, the very first time I went with Bruce I was witness to "the recon." This is a real thing,
and what I am about to describe is not an isolated incident, no sirree. Humongously fat people will
literally go scout the buffet.

>any tips

Don't.

Lunch is better but I'd make some sausage biscuits i guess

wash your hands after touching all the serving utensils. for real.

If they have the sausage breakfast burritos, get those. They're fucking good, maybe better than McDonald's sausage burritos. Also, if they have the little waffles with apple pie filling and cream cheese, get that too because they're fucking good. Avoid the cheesy potatoes, the """cheese""" is shitty and bland, you're better off with plain hash browns with some sausage gravy.

>IF YOU DON'T KEEP YOUR DPS UP WE'LL HAVE TO KICK YOU OUT OF THE GUILD DUDE.

I'm here now. What do?

>objective
survive

I ate a shit ton of bacon and fried chicken and accidentally clogged the handicap toilet. I didn't know what to do so I left.

Please, continue. This is amazing.

Christ you sound intolerable

...

Seriously, this. Their standards are so low that they should die from the heat and pressure of the planets core.

They're responsible for one of the only two times I've gotten food-borne illness. And made national news when one location was caught rotating green-molded meat to the back so they could rinse it off.

Shoneys breakfast buffet is better,

Eat nothing but meats and sip water or soda. No milk. Good luck user

Remember it's a marathon, not a sprint. Eat slowly but don't stop. Don't take breaks. Piss and shit before eating. Just keep getting plates of food.

Please, don't take the steam tray! Sir!

TO BE FAIR
SCHECHUAN SAUCE
>BRAP
NOTHING MATTERS
WUBBA LUBBA DUB DUB
PICKLE RICK!!!

The fuck is this shit

Your words made me do a sick

What is that log on the plate?

sausage link

a buffet is in no way a challenge and if you ever end up being at one stop worrying about the cost of the food, your pleb is showing.

Bring a bucket to puke in.

The "dog butter" story on that site is hilarious too
pjwnex.us/media/text/DogButter.txt

I think it's just a bunch of pre-Veeky Forums text copypasta, from Something Awful and the like. The socialism in medicine one, and the charred body in oven story. I miss the early 00s internet.

turd

I wish I could reddit, I wish I could...

Andy sixx present

Probably can't go back for a while. The chicken wasn't bad. Bacon was kinda salty. I ordered a water but they had a free juice machine and I drank a lot of that. Gravy was cold and the biscuits were dry. Sausage was okay. Got chocolate milk and ice cream too. Both were pretty good. Blueberry pancakes weren't bad. Ham was cold but had good flavor. The egg bar guy made me three nice over easy eggs. Cinnamon rolls were good. Cookies were decent. Brownies were really good. I got another icecream in a cone before we left and it was good too. Overall I'd rate it 6.5/10. Good variety but a lot of misses.

Golden Corral doesn't do breakfast
just suck your Mom's dick instead

>This is basically sunken cost fallacy

Fuck off back to >Veeky Forums

Prepare to be disappointed.
Not even joking about this. I like golden corral well enough to eat there once a month but their breakfast is shit.

I understand this thinking but I also only eat what I like instead of what is expensive.
But I eat a fuckload of what I like. Last time I went I had 7 plates full of food and two plats of dessert. Easily the most tasty vomit I had later that day.

There are still Shoney's?

>tfw monday
>tfw can't go to THE golden corral breakfast until Saturday

why live?

The only good breakfast at GC is the made to order stuff, omelets and waffles, but the fried chicken is usually out in the mornings now and I like their rolls and corn bread. The biscuits are just ok. Be sure to walk over to the salad bar to grab spinach for your omelet because the fucks don't keep it with the other ingredients. Really the above is all you should eat there, I only keep going back cause the fried chicken.

Ur Shit after eating this bs