Hey guys

I'm fine with criticism, in fact I welcome it.
But what advice would you give me to improve my writing?

The imagery isn't that good or powerful user (I guess it could be, but the execution is pretty pedestrian here, so if you have something better, I really doubt this theft, if it's real, hurts you in any way.)

Honestly I think it's just the straw on the camel and the source of anger is mainly my addiction to this place even though I hate so much about it and the cost outweighs the benefit a thousandfold.

Why do you call it a poem?

you need to
write
the truth
and
only the truth
because
anything that is good
is
anything that is true
ask Nietzsche

Don't come here for serious critic, anonymous people will destroy anything. Work on your own stuff, try to publish, etc. Writing can be ungrateful, and it takes a stupid amount of work for very little reward, but getting angry here is pointless.

Yeah, I agree. Problem is I have no connections I respect enough to get good crits irl and I got excited about the possibility here so I think I'm venting with disappointment that it's not a valid option. Thought I'd found a tribe to help me get this book finished (it's at 95% after about ten years off and on work), but that's not going to happen.

easier said than done.
It's hard to find the truth. Truth isn't fact. Truth is something like a mirror made of metaphors that reflects your face without distortion, showing all your pores and imperfections

still, good advice

why shouldn't I call it a poem?
it is, by definition, a poem

you're not well, mentally. seek professional help. I'm not trying to poke fun at you. I want the best for you, and that is to seek help

If it's really 95% done, finish it and send it out and start something else. It's no good to keep working over 10 years on a single book, especially when it's your first one. If you need support, look for local writing groups or workshops.