What should I know about oysters?

I dunno the local Chinese buffet in my town has oysters and they are deep turded and covered in a super creamy sauce that I have to scrape off

I pick them up with my fingers and pull the meat off with a fork and slurp it up

Shit's cash

For me, it's canned smoked oysters. The Best Oysters.

If you're already in Portland, go to Duckfat and get their poutine

What gay bars do you recommend?

the big ones are kind of nasty

I love seafood but never understood the appeal of oysters
Too many conflicting textures and tastes, every bite haschewy, gummy, snotlike, and hard in such a small area, and even at good places it's a coin flip whether the oyster is going to be full of sand or eldritch black stuff. Barely tastes like anything, just vaguely salty/fishy, completely drowned out by whatever sauce/lemon/cracker you put on it.
That plus the fact that they're dumdum expensive.

Clams are better

never bite an Oyster in half and look at it, always put the whole thing in your mouth. chew no more than 10 times, you won't do any good by continously chewing something that isn't solid.

Maine food is underwhelming.

I honestly am not a fan of cooked oysters. I have always eaten them raw. A favorite of my is the Belon but a good second are Kumamotos and the last are Standish Shore oysters but that because they shuck pretty clean.

I'm an oyster farmer on Cape Cod, I grow Barnstable oysters. AMA?

they aren't kosher

do you have to be a good swimmer? Do you need a second job to get by? Is it fun and easy, or just hard work like most other physical jobs?

No, don't need to swim. We have a few sites, one is exposed by low tide and you can work with the bags and cages. Another is always underwater and we use dredges or rakes to harvest them. Sometimes when the supply is low before the new crop is ready in early-late summer, we'll snorkel them up.

This is my only job, I'm part owner so I make a decent amount (40-something K). My employees make 15-17/hr.

It's not "fun" but it beats working in an office. It's not "easy" but it's not difficult. There's a lot of tedious stuff like sorting through oysters while standing at a table. We're shut down right now because of the nor'easter that just hit and the next one coming, so we're kinda doing busywork now. But we work year-round, there's always something to do.

can I find the farmers catching them and sorting on the dock and go up to them and buy them for cash? sounds like your employees don't make much and so would accept that

That place in pretty good desu. I am from New Orleans, somehow our oysters are less salty. The ice's were interesting. I prefer charbroiled desu.

That's gross

There's 2 classes of oyster growers: growers and grower/dealers. Growers can only sell to licensed dealers, and can not sort off of their plot, so they do all sorting at their growing area.

Once the oysters are bagged up, they go to the docks and meet the dealers, or drive their product straight to the dealers. A grower absolutely CAN NOT sell to anyone other than a licensed dealer. All shellfish is tagged by the grower with harvester tags, and the dealer receives them and switches the tags to retail tags.

Since I'm both a grower and a dealer, I "sell them" to myself, and then can sell them to restaurants and other wholesalers. A grower who tried to sell to someone who isn't licensed could have his permits revoked. I've seen shady ads on craigslist that resulted in the guys being fined.

My employees make a decent amount, and we pay for lunches. You're not going to be a millionaire, but it's decent for the area.

Then the employees would be stealing from their employer.

I have a restaurant that runs their product through me (they are also a grower, they sell to us, a dealer, and we sell back to them). One of their employees was taking oysters and selling them directly to a competing restaurant and pocketing the cash.

Extremely illegal, because besides the obvious, the oysters don't go through the paperwork process and aren't held by a FDA-approved and inspected dealer. When we get oysters, they have a chain of custody and are subject to time and temperature controls to make sure they are safe.

hmm, i had no idea it was harder to source oysters than african diamonds

that's true this never happens.

So how much should I offer to buy a few for cash right off the pier?

What are you? A fucking walrus or a carpenter? Don't eat oysters, do NOT eat them. You're disgusting if you eat oysters.

If your going to get frozen oysters. Thaw them out in salt water. It's a old fish and chips trick

Ever find a pearl? Or is that a meme?

It happens but they’re usually misshapen and tiny. I’ve eaten a ton of oysters and only seen it twice.

Growers up here usually get $0.50-.65 a piece. If he's willing to sell them to you without going through the right channels, he's willing to lose his license for a few bucks. Offer $15 a doz.

In my 5 or so years, I've found 1 the size of a grain of sand, and looked like a little chalk ball. Most edible oysters don't produce mother-of-pearl. Look at the inside of an oyster next time you eat them, they're white not pearlescent.

Kek. It's a $20M industry in Massachusetts alone.

How do you seed a reef for oysters?

I don't. I get my seed from a hatchery and raise them in bags. As they grow, they get put into progressively larger mesh sizes. When big enough, they go into 3'x4' open-top cages or directly on the bottom. This makes them look pretty and more desirable for the raw bar market.

I have nothing against the guys down south who grow oysters in big clumps, but it produces a shitty looking oyster. Most of those go into quart buckets for frying.

Also, the seed I get is specially bred, compared to wild stuff. If you see an oyster with a black stripe down the side, it was hatched in a lab. I don't want to get too technical, but they are called triploid, meaning they have a different number chromosomes than your normal diploid. They are sterile and don't spawn, so they stay plump year-round instead of wasting energy by mating. The stored sugars help them get through winters better than wild oysters.

How do you feel about your competition? Is oyster farming friendly, or are people trying to burn each others’ shit to the ground?

wow so much bullshit red tape

Can you offer me a job?

Ancap state when?

Mostly friendly, but there are some assholes that poach customers. Also, it's getting too crowded. If many more guys start growing, the market's gonna crash.

Not right now, but things pick up late spring.

If you are trying to get into oysters I suggest starting with smaller and less salty varieties, then slowly transitioning to big fucking salty oysters that are like eating the ocean. As for etiquette all I can say is that no one eats oysters alone so don't be stingy, order twice as much as you actually intend to eat and let your oyster loving or adventurous friends pick your oysters on half-shell like an appetizer. Oysters are good sharing food. As for eating it, don't drain out any of the saltwater in the half-shell it's supposed to be there, it's apart of what makes an oyster taste that way. Some oysters don't get properly shucked so it's okay to loosen them up from the bottom with a fork or knife but don't scramble the oyster itself. As for accouterments, you usually get lemon wedges, cocktail sauce, horse radish, and mignonette which is just shallots in vinegar with some spice. Tabasco is also pretty common. Experiment with which things you like the most on an oyster and nail down the one or combination of two that you love but don't be the guy who puts every fucking thing on the oyster, that just means you don't like oysters and are trying to drown the flavor. Or you could just eat is straight. Personally I like horseradish and lemon.

ps. Also forgot to mention, alot of the time some people just bolt oysters down without really savoring it. I've heard people say that's the best way to eat an oyster and they are full of it. An oyster deserves a few good chomps before swallowing it.

pps. Also don't turn your nose up at grilled oysters or oysters Rockefeller just because they aren't raw and alive, they taste fucking great too. Also as for pairings I don't know shit about wine but the beer pairings for oysters are traditionally either Guinness or very light crisp lagers with little hoppiness. I'd suggest Czechvar, Trumer, or Einstock.

Hopefully demand will rise along with production. Cheap oysters for everyone is something I can get behind.

How long does the season last? Year round since its done inside?

Im a summerfag who was almost worked on an oyster farm in Wellfleet (lt island) ama

why are tendies so delicious?

because mother crafts them with love