Culinary confession thread

I took a pill in Ibiza

I don't soak my beans

You fucking bastard. WHERE ARE YOU FROM?

gay

...

I don't wash my rice and I regularly eat sandwiches that just consist of mayo, ketchup and several kraft singles

Georgia, but I did live in Ohio for a little bit

I really hate niggers. Every time they come in, they always try to make an excuse as to why they deserve free shit. The other day, one of them asked me for 3 apple pies and I told them it would take about 2 minutes for the next batch. She asked for the entire meal free "fo da inconvenyess" which I denied. She made a scene and demanded to see the manager, which she then proceeded to lie to about how I called her a nigger (which I didn't). Nobody else was in line at the time and heard the conversation to defend me. The manager (who is also a nigger) hates me and is pretty much looking for a reason to fire me now.

I go to bars dressed as a girl and fool neckbeards into buying me peach bellinis

Ha you deserved it for working for a nigger.

Do they ever take you home and destroy your boipussy?

Yes, I enjoy it.

>getting mad you actually have to do your job
do us all a favor and smash your testicles with a hammer and then eat a bullet to ensure you never breed.

why are you on Veeky Forums? Go away.

Plz no bully, Veeky Forums is a board for all

Post boy pucci then

>not your fucking slave.
Yes you are, retard.

Wow why are you so mad. It's not like you'll get STD from my saliva wtf. I thought Veeky Forums was bully free zone?

I've had four and a half jobs for like three years trying to make scratch and finish school. I'm not destitute, but I am lean.

I rarely wash my hands at work and I do part time at a coffee shop and pick up shifts waiting tables once or twice a week and bar tend on Sundays at my skeeball place for some extra cash. I pick my nose and from time to time, I scratch my balls and enjoy the smell, especially when I biked to work on that day.

If we're talking about cooking, I love salt too much and over salt things commonly. For appearance only I'll act as if I like sweet and savory, for the sake of being "cultured", but honestly I hate sweetly cooked meat; it's dogshit.

I'm a legitimate homosexual.

I don't get this. I worked for McDonald's for two years and never acted that way. I work in a high end restaurant now and make good money. A job is a job. Don't be a piss baby because it's the only job you can get at the time. Work yourself up and go somewhere else. People in this industry will always be ass holes to you no matter the restaurant/bar.

Weak little faggot needs a cage for his microtestes?

I only eat instant rice at home. I just don't see the point of going through the trouble of cooking rice, or buying shit like basmati. It's only there so that I can pour stew over it.

Somebody’s on the rag

t. edgy underage

The employees at dominos pizza I work at have zero regard for food safety

Stay away from Dominos

I use bouillon cubes for soups instead of broth.

Look, the people you are after are the people you depend on. We cook your meals, we haul your trash, we connect your calls, we drive your ambulances. We guard you while you sleep. Do NOT... fuck with us.

The only reason I've learned to cook is to impress people. I don't actually care about what I personally eat.

COMMUNIST!!!! I hope you get your legs broken by Pinkerton agents and go to debtor's prison.

can tell by your attitude and where you are now that you'll never climb higher. and that makes me happy and grateful for the decisions i've made thus far

stay low for me

I use truffle oil instead of truffles regularly in my cooking

>not getting the reference
You just be 18 to post here.

>Can't even form cogent sentences
You need to speak English to post here.

I would give away free food because I hated my boss
I liked to think of every little ding I made into his kids college fund...
damaged

My nigga

We are legion, expect us...in your food.

I'm illiterate. Never learned to read or write. It's my greatest shame.

Makes sense. Go back to fucking your cousin and collecting unemployment. Let real workers take your job

That's the opposite of "edgy underage" mentality dumbass.

Just as good as buying broth in a container and much less fucking idiotic.

Now, fresh broth...

Go back to you meme spewing cretin

I intentionally do things people say never to do when it comes to combinations. Sometimes they come out amazingly. Rarely has it been inedible.

my burgers almost always have pink in the middle because I make them too thick so they can be big enough while fitting 4 in my pan

>hes too much of a pussy to take it out on the corporate structure
>just vents his frustration through petty shit at consumers

No one buying food from mcdonalds really has an easy life dog

Why do fat people always wear their watch practically on their hand, and bunch their horrid fat paws like that when taking wrist shots

I never buy fresh herbs always jarred. There is a minor taste difference but not enough to justify the extra cost and storage anxiety.

I use less water than directed for a more intense flavor.
crunchy vanilla pudding is a trip

I still don't know how to use a knife, and all I own is a paring knife, which I use for everything.

I always grab the biggest knife available.
I've cut myself more than once directly because of this.

>

Ass

Fucking animal

dude, youtube

this is the best post on Veeky Forums right now

I have schiziphrenia lol

When I worked at a deli, I made a variety of prepackaged sandwiches. In particular, we had regular chicken salad and vegan "chicken" salad. Well, one day I was in a rush to get them all made before my shift ended, and I accidentally knocked over the two pans with the salads, and wound up "contaminating" the vegan one with some of the chicken. I didn't pick it out either. All of the sandwiches sold, too, so someone out there got a meaty surprise :^)

I just ate some months-expired cereal with ants crawling through it.

dont worry I got the reference.

how did you make this post then silly?

I press buttons on my keyboard at random and keep getting really lucky because nobody`s caught on yet. I don`t even know what your post says, I`m just guessing.

I don't really see the problem, everybody seems to be having a good time.

Little Caesars is GOOD. I like the taste and the price

I'm laff

I unironically never cook anymore

Once boiled oats with yogurt and water because I didnt have milk
It was tolerable

I started working two years ago.
I've gotten to sous chef and people tend to like me and my ideas when it comes to cooking and the other senior chefs tell me that I've got a bright career in store.

But I have no passion. In cooking. In anything.

Mayo > Ketchup as a fry condiment, especially seasoned fries

I hate cutting/peeling garlic, so most of the time don't use them, unless they are integral for the recipe.

>I regularly eat sandwiches that just consist of mayo, ketchup and several kraft singles

anything > ketchup. It tastes like shit.

nothing wrong with this whatsoever
t. non-euro

pig

Dude I'm coming off an 11-hour shift and sometimes I just don't feel like cooking myself something. I just want to eat something and go to bed.

Not everyone is a silver spoon Boomer who wants to order late at night to antagonize you. I hope you die of AIDS.

You can't spit on my mcnuggies without me noticing bitch

I'll take my stupid order and get stale nuggets and soggy fries and be happy with it because that's the best I deserve ordering this shit at 2am

Theres this one employee who is a real bro and I just sat in drive through chatting with him for like 5 minutes Utes because it was just me and he was bored as fuck. He's a cool guy and he likes that I'm not an asshole to the employees

I use to love to cook/bake a lot,learn new recipes and techniques, and experiment/try new things.
I've stagnated and repeat a lot of the easy stuff.

I should try again.

I'm with you bro but that's why I don't go to the poorly reviews mcdonalds because it all comes down to management. Never go to any fast food in the ghettos and never go to any that are isolated from main areas; exception being highways that are used frequently day and night. Some of those are pretty good as there are no other jobs around so it's probably competitive.

I used to think that well done steak was the business when I was like 15/16. I'm now 26 and believe me, I've seen the errors of my ways.

I used to order all of my steak well done with a side of tomato sauce.

At one point to try and impress my gf at the time, I bought fillet steaks, realised that I got them too early, froze them for a week, defrosted them in the microwave and proceeded to cook them well done.

No wonder she cheated on me

>Put rice in a pot and let soak while you go shower/poo/brush your teeth/whatever
>Drain rice
>Refill water so that the water reaches the first digit on your index finger (the part of your finger with your nail on it)
>Cook on high before turning to low
>Forget about it while watching TV for 15 minutes
>Go back to it, afraid that it might be burned
>Perfectly cooked rice

That TV watching part is pretty important 2bh. Every time I cook rice, I always forget about it while watching TV or eating something else I cooked, and everytime I rush back to check on it 15 minutes later, it's always perfectly cooked.

my nama jeff

I eat friend chicken and doner kebabs sober.
t. Brit-fag.

wow that's actually really fucking racist and not funny at all, I don't know if you think you're being edgy or what but that is not cool.

Neck yourself

Are you putting yourself on the same level as garbage collectors or ambulance drivers? Because you're not.
How can you even be so self absorbed thinking what you are doing would benefit society the same way your other examples do?

Burn in hell. I'm not sure if you realize this but most of the people you're serving spit-ridden food with work wageslave jobs that are just as bad if not worse than you.

A lot of people think rich people keep poor people down, but the truth is they only hurt themselves.

What the fuck is instant rice?

I legit enjoy spy fight me /pol/

>Is in fact a racist
>Gets accused of racism
>Thinks his black manager does not realize he is a racist
Hide your power level better faggot

I think I have some sort of food addiction and I don't wanna admit it. I'm on a diet again and it's really fucking with my head right now. I know that all I need is sheer willpower, and I already did it in the past. I just wish I could stay healthy instead of jumping back and forth every few years.

>nigger detected

I'm the same way user. I've accepted that my weight is going to be a lifelong battle. The important thing is to never give up.