How do I grow the sourest pickles possible?

vinegrate your soil

Just b urself

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the pickle is the brine

brine: sulfuric acid + bleach + 3 lemons + salt

Where do you think the bacteria live?

in ur butt

First you have to get seeds from a species of sour pickles. Then you have to plant them in a tide pool in the ocean. The growing season for sour pickles is August to October.

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Fuck off picklet

i cum on cat she hiss at penis

>You can't grow a pickle.
There's medication for that now.

Want to make it as sour as chemically fucking possible? Add some malic acid powder to that brine. It's the most sour edible acid on earth and it's the shit they coat warheads extreme with. I'm talking burn your tastebuds, make your mouth bleed powerful.

amazon.com/Its-Delish-Malic-Acid/dp/B00XV2XNGW

God have mercy on your soul

>warheads extreme
hnnnnnng

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Bleach is basic you moron, you might as well cross out sulfuric acid and bleach and instead write "Slightly acidic water"

that's just gonna make some chlorine gas

underrated

Expose the pickle to attending a third rate college, fail getting into the department of its choosing, settle into a shit major out of desperation, graduate with an okay GPA, spend a year unemployed because no company is hiring with the pickle's skillset, let it get a job that doesn't pay that well, isn't even in related to its major and let it date a woman for years until they slowly realize they're not a match for each other and break up. It's a super good brine for that sort of stuff.

>Replace vinegar with Industrial vinegar and take out the water.

Ingredients
24 pickling cucumbers (3 to 4 inches each)
Sweet red pepper 1 To taste, sliced
2 heads of fresh dill plant
Garlic 4 Clove (5gm)
Pickling Spices 2 Teaspoon
Alum 1/8 Teaspoon

Brine
Vinegar 1 Cup (16 tbs)
Water 2 Cup (16 tbs)
Pickling salt 1/4 Cup (16 tbs)

*personal addendum 2TBSp of white sugar
Hot Pickled pepper for sweet red.
double the garlic
Don’t use a freaking microwave.

Directions
1 Wash cucumbers; cut off flower end. Cover with ice water, let stand 2 hours.
2 Divide red pepper, dill, garlic, pickling spices and alum between two 1-quart jars. Pack cucumbers into jars.
3 Combine Brine ingredients in 4-cup glass measure.
4 Microwave 10 to 15 minutes on HIGH, or until boiling (about 200° F). Fill jars with hot brine mixture. Cool; cover, and refrigerate for at least 24 hours before serving. Pickles will keep up to 3 months in refrigerator. 2 Quarts Pickles

I always wondered, why the alum?

>This nigga can't grow a pickle plant.

Exactly. I still go to the grocery store for chicken whispers, green todds. and apple himmers. But I grow my own vinegar husbands.

They had a good sale on yard meat yesterday.

OP is one of the half-dozen or so worthless meme forcers that shit up this board on a monotonously regular basis. He’s not interested in pickles, he’s interested in luring newfags out of the woodwork and making oldfags rage.

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Keeps them crisp

>he doesn't know how to grow pickles

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Just go to home depot and grab a few pickle plants. Now is the right time for planting.

wat

>You can't grow a pickle.
Not with that attitude you can't.

YA CAN'T TUNE A FISH!!

i enjoy most of the meme forcers. all except the jiro one, he can suck a dick

I find that half a cup of kosher salt per quart of potting soil does the trick. Water twice weekly with boiling vinegar.