ITT: Veeky Forums runs a store

this... this would actually be p cool. i reckon you'd need ultra creative and pro people in the shop though.

nothing would get sold, we could just trashtalk all the customers and tell them to post a fit if they disliked an item.

NO RICK OWENS

A Gosha Rubchinskiy store located in east Berlin in a commieblock basement with a heavily 80's eastern Europe-influenced interior, pic rel.

Not on topic: since Gosha is the biggest meme brand on Veeky Forums right now (besides Rick Owens, but RO has been loved by Veeky Forums so long it doesn't count) what will the next meme brand be?

I'd imagine one of the jap brands. Yohji has been gaining more attention beyond his name on y-3 as of late. That and maaaybe cdg homme plus

the fuccbois will never be able to afford it though

maybe yohji but I doubt cdg

>The store assistants spend all day asking each other as well as the customers: "Is this Veeky Forums"?

this desu

>Manager to checkout please
>Can white people buy this, sir?

It's an internet cafe but the only sites you can access is Veeky Forums, grailed, and suicide hotiline.

yeah no. they've been at it for too long to be a meme brand

top cringe

>as of late

If I honestly had my way?

An extremely old world library style place, no clothing hanging, lots of small and cozy rooms. Opulent without being tryhard, like the rooms of some sort of private social club. Run by a mix of old male tailors (who would ostensibly bring skill with them) and attractive young women (who would inject youthful taste into things, keeping it from getting too stodgy). When you enter (and every time you enter), you are quickly and discreetly measured, then given huge books full of fabric and clothing options, from which you can pick what you want. It is then custom-made for you domestically and shipped to you when complete. Stuff that doesn't require custom creation (e.g. shoes, t-shirts, etc.) are brought to you based upon your measured body type. The goal here wouldn't be to just do suits and dress shirts - everyone does that - but to offer designs seen on the runway or from popular brands that aren't covered by design patents/trademarks.

From a marketing standpoint: it'd be the double whammy of giving guys the old world tailoring they want while keeping subtle pressure to buy vis-a-vis the attractive young women and the fact that clothing is directly brought to them. The measuring "at the door" would also apply subtle pressure to buy.

All white store, one cashier on the back, coat racks coming out from the side supported by nothing else but the wall, mirrors in between each rack. In the middle maybe one or two simple tables and stools to sit on when trying shoes on.

>more attention

Yeah they've been talked about years before but theres more interest as of late, probably in relation to comfy/tapered/baloon pants and cropped lengths. Neither are new things, its just how Veeky Forums develops tastes for things i guess

That sounds comfy af. I would feel out of place its so nice.

it has music that goes "unce unce unce unce" and has a wine area for all the moms to socialize while their teenagers peruse the store. The store is wall-to-wall black jeans and cps and all the staff are average looking twentysomething women whose presence makes all the teens uncomfortable and forces them to hurry up and make quick decisions to buy.

Kek

Don't forget "can non-whites wear prep?"

I like it

>the staff are average looking twentysomething women whose presence makes all the teens uncomfortable and forces them to hurry up and make quick decisions to buy.

This marketing strategy is genius because it works on me

>custom made MAGA hats
>the entire staff are cryptobetas that have changed their looks into Chad but are deep down betas
>an old tv plays Drive with vaporwave-y flavour to it
>Death Grips plays in the store at all times
>Bane and Patrick Bateman hang on the walls in a messed up modern art style so you don't realise it's them from a movie unless you look closely
>lots of "scumwave" clothing, expensive clothing imitating the lower classes
>All the clothing are in different areas based on race and height
>the staff will tell you non-whites can't wear prep if you attempt to buy a polo shirt

Did I forget any memes?

thats the old comme store actually
doesn't surprise me gosha now uses the space

>as of late
kek

>cdg homme plus

no chance fuccbois are going to start wearing homme plus

Mediocre
Thanks, that's the idea

Honestly sounds pretty fucking great. I'd go.

classy lounge type shit
make sure display shows the top shit and newest arrival
also the centerpiece is a vans old skool

A hidden room full of dodgy reps.

ofc bateman would make the young women 20 something asians so he can poon them

a big cartel site full of supreme reps

Kek
>brand is literally called Effay
>SS16 collection was a a scumwave collection
>every collection changes radically each year due to Veeky Forums discovering new cores
>no prep/menswear/suits allowed
>men with beards aren't allowed entry
>men who bench more than 90kg are banned from the store
>the staff are really rude and will constantly say you can't wear X item because you're not a certain race
>you will be forced to ask "is this effay?" to everything you try on

A huge variety of styles of clothing: techwear, classic mensweat, streetwear, palewave, americana, gothninja and whatever else is big....
....but every piece of clothing somewhere has a picture of my penis, it could be a big picture or a small picture or could even be incorporated into a patterned print. But it is always on there.

There is an entire section of rare animals we sell as well as clothing and art. They're all animalos and their name ends with an O.

Decor and wallpaper are wrapped (like a car wrap) with screenshots of iconic Veeky Forums posts, images or shitposts such as poets final post, or the 'where can i find this shirt'

As a retail merchandiser, this is how I'm doing the underwear section:

all the socks, undershirts and underwear are packaged in cardboard boxes, and stocked into a series of vending machines.

Fucking spot on. Also
>the cashier makes fun of what you are buying to your face

Kek

I'm not that guy but here's my contribution.
All the clothes would hang high enough that manlets couldn't reach them, and the employees aren't allowed to help.

>niggers are not segregated to make purchases through the backdoor

YES ART HOES

Kek would actually be p cool

nO. TOO MUCH
D R A M A
R
A
M
A

youtube.com/watch?v=jtmhKTNV1HA

bateman you're the best trip by far, please keep posting

Staff consists of pale skinny teenagers that sit in a corner of the store shittalking behind your back.
In the background plays either techno or shoegaze.
The entrance area stocks only designer gear of 5 to 6 Brands. If you go deeper into the store the staff will get more brand obsessed and try to talk you into buying chelsea boots, geobaskets, cps etc.
Needless to say that all employees disagree violently with each other and aso the customers questions about the quality of an item.

Wait wait no art hoes??? You're tripping

It's an exact replica of H&M

Instead ofburningthe clothes, they should be cataloged by date.

Blouse Barn in this show when David took over

Literally how Veeky Forums would run it