Why were the Ancient Greeks so based? Everything about them is awesome...

Why were the Ancient Greeks so based? Everything about them is awesome. They're like the most wonderfully autistic people of all time. I mean, Socrates pretty much invented shitposting.

Imagine the different city states like the different people in a cliche highschool romcom drama.
I find it an affront of the highest degree to people who have studied Greek to reduce them to such a level, but it's the only way to explain them to someone who has never studied them.

Spartans are definitely Chads.

Athenians would be the Nerds/Dorks.

What to make of the Thebans?

Normies.

Band kids.

Persians are Staff.

But the Sacred Band of Thebes

an entire society based around gains

Nah, Athenians are the smart, successful, yet still popular kids.
Corinthians are the nerds.

Corinth was the rich one though

What would that make Alexander?

They also, possibly, the greatest military commander of all time

Everything about ancient greeks is GOAT

...

Alexander was a slav though

not, greek...

Kek, this. Rich nerds.

>pretending to be retarded

Don't start this shit. He spoke Greek, he considered himself Greek and the people he conquered considered him Greek. He was a fucking Greek now fuck off with your memery

>Alexander is not Greek
t. The Greeks

>Ancient Greeks
>Entire High School
>not a football team
>Athens the de facto team captain
>Sparta the hyper-aggressive linebacker
>Thebes the really strong gay dude who plays center
>Corinth the massively wealth, arrogant and inflated narcissistic wide receiver
>team is largely plagued by each of the star player's conflicting egos, about to lose the big games against their rivals at Persia High until...
>new kid and star quarterback Alexander unites the teams and teaches them all the true meaning of friendship

He was Greek, fuck off

>Alexander then gets kicked out of the team and expelled from school for pranking the principal

Thebans are thespians

pic unrelated

kek thought that was a pic of Aylan Kurdi in the thumbnail

Why were they so based? Because we view them through the romantic perspective of western civilizations. They are our "progenitors" for our entire way of life. Not all was perfect in paradise though. "Democracy" wasn't done right until the United States. The Greeks basically lived through a repeating cycle of electing people who became tyrants.
They were pretty based fitness gods though that were nearly unstoppable walls of rippling muscle and spears.

Why isn't this a thing. Why would a just and loving god allow a universe where this doesn't exist

"Democracy" wasn't done right until the United States"

You sure got a funny definition of democracy my friend.

>"Democracy" wasn't done right until the United States.
>Hey guys, let's give CITIZENSHIP AT BIRTH :DDDD
>Let's give the right to vote to EVERYONE!

Because all of our sources are written by Greeks, and they were even more egocentric than modern Americans. You might as well read official Soviet historians and wonder why Communism is so based.

Spartans are too cinservative and slow to be chads, I'd probably put Athenians as chads. Spartans are the popular, self-assured but quiet and somewhat predictable kid.

Oh, and the Thebans are the theatre kids

Macedon=school shooters.

spartans are clearly the bullies
athenians are the smart, successful chads

Thebans are the band/theatre troupe

Go away, idiot.

SPARTA = "ISTP", "INTP", "INTJ".

ATHENS = "ENTJ", "ESTP", "ESTJ".

THEBES = "INFP", "ENTP", "ESFJ".

CORINTH = "ISFP", "ENFP", "ENTJ".

TRIPOLI = "ESFP", "ISFJ", "ISTJ".

>Cinservative

fuck I'm an idiot

you = autism

have tripfags ever contributed anything intelligent to this board?

some history graduate used a trip to answer questions in a thread a while back, but they only used the trip for that thread

Feel free to be picky about it. The point is that the United States was the one who solved the problems of peaceful succession and a system that allowed for consistently non-tyrant elected rulers.

>Spartans are the popular, self-assured but quiet and somewhat predictable kid.

That's not even a cliche, is it?

>for final game, they cast off their football pads and it's now stylized like 300, wearing only groin protection and the colors are all dramatized
>Persians at the 1 yard line of the Greeks, with 5 seconds left, scores tied, all goes silent
>One band kid starts the chant from 300: AHOO
>Everyone picks it up
>Sparta holds the line, pushing back the ball carrier
>AHOO
while Athens can grab the ball , taking it all the way down for a touchdown as numerous others dive in front of the persians
>AHOO
>TOUCHDOWN

And to replace it with a ruling plutocrat oligarchic elite. Great job.

Representative democracy, oligarchy, call it what you may. Again, the point is that the United States is the one that figured out how to make (acquiescing to your biases) a semi-Democratic in form working system. It's a far better form of government than the majority of what's out there. It just relies on the people to cherish it and be informed about how their own system works. Once that stops happening, then the cracks in the armor show.

more like

>the new coach Phillip II unites the team
>his spoiled son carries the team thanks to his blessed genes

Why is democracy superior to any other form of government?

(read for some nice critique of democracy)

Do american schools have the guy who would be a chad except he is so obsessed with his sport that he doesnt take any advantage of his Chad-ness?

What's this guy called because he is sparta.

You're 200 fucking years old. Who knows what fun internal wars you've yet to have.

>trump becomes president
>riots in every city
>trump uses executive order that anybody can shoot to kill those protestors if they trespass into their or boss property
>rioters killed and stumped

There you go, civil war 2 over.

I wouldn't claim it is superior to any other form of government. I can't, nor do I think anyone else can, make a claim of such magnitude. What works for one group of people may be disastrous for another. The only point I'm making is that the United States was the first state to create a democracy that solved many of the problems with democratic systems before it. Is it perfect? Absolutely not but it is a better system than a lot of what came before.

Like the American Civil War? I agree, friend. Don't assume just because I may be American (which I am) that I'm tooting the "glory oh America" horn with the flag painted on my face and a burger in my mouth. The American system is not perfect and it can collapse or be twisted into something different. In fact, it will happen just like any other government in human history. What's important is how long will it take and how much of an impact will the original idea have on following governments.

I can agree with that. If you didn't catch any diseases and had a bit of money to invest you could do a lot of stuff in the then democratic/libertarian society of the U.S.

Kek

>The day before the big game
>The team decided they don't like Alexander much
>Want more individual input
>They send Thebes to give him an ultimatum
>"Let me think about it"
>The next day
>Alexander ass rapes Thebes in front of the whole team
>Thebes has to go to hospital, will never shit straight again
>Team now so scared of Alexander that they obliterate Persian High

fuck off albania