/job hunt/

how do I get an entry level corporation job?

I wish I knew user. I'm trying to find something that offers me benefits and room to grow myself. Not having much luck.

If the people around you have it figured out, why not ask them all this?

Studied international affairs and Chinese (intermediate level now). I studied abroad in Asia for a year, and would like to do something like that, but I feel like those opportunities are out of my reach or I have no idea where to start.

Look for small businesses first. It's a lot easier to get an interview as they don't have the algorithms and hiring politics like big companies to. Then after a year or two, apply for the big leagues.

man you guys used to have daily job hunt threads, what happened?

I am fucking losing my mind.
I graduated 2 years ago and I still haven't found a job. Is it because I have been unemployed for 5+ years? Is it because I've only ever held one job?

I've uploaded my resume to like every resume checker site. I've even spent money to get it checked out by 'professionals'. They suggested I add some stuff to fill out the employment gap such as volunteer work. I did the best I can and it still feels empty. It scores higher on all these shitty resume checkers but I haven't gotten more call backs, if anything I've gotten less.

I've only ever had 2 on-site interviews since graduating and not a single one of them was in 2015 and 2016. Is there something I'm fundamentally doing wrong or am I just forever fucked because I don't have experience. I have hundreds of CVs on my computer, most of which are from this year. I spent the last two months applying for any job I can find not just the ones in my field: Shoprite, gamestop, CVS, taco bell, etc.. and I still haven't gotten an interview. My dumb ass 17 year old self can get a job at ihop but I can't get a job now? Shouldn't it be easier? I have a degree, I'm older, I'm wiser, I have a job experience.

I live near New York, I have a reliable source of transportation, I have a degree, I have a supposedly good resume, I write all my CVs with all the techniques I'm told I should do in the year 2016. I just want a job, I need money. I've been mooching off my parents for 2 years, my only source of income is $2-3/hour gruelingly surveys on amazon turk and I have to keep constantly deferring my student loans.

What the fuck do I do. Is it because I went to community college? Is it because everyone has a cis degree already? Is it my unemployment gap? Do I smell funny? Someone tell me what I'm doing wrong.

Yes. Find a way to fill your employment gap.

Do more volunteer work. It fills your work gap and also sometimes, if they like you enough, they might hire you in other positions. Goodwill, surprisingly enough, also does job training.

I disagree,

Just get a local job. Cashier. Restaurant. Anything to fill that gap on your resume and to get some money coming in even if it's small.

You'll be kicking yourself for the amount you pay in loans every month if you don't.

First disregard all the things you're 'meant' to put on your resume. Every other cunt will be doing the same so by not doing it you stand out. Just make it look nice, don't include irrelevant info or be pretentious. Also make up some shit for the time you weren't working and put down a friend as your boss if you can/want.

anyone else losing hope? even cold-approaching retail doesn't work because I'm fucking 22 (they have to pay higher minimum wage) and I don't have any customer service experience whatsoever

>I have a degree
But what is it? This is important.

Tbh just call the place you want to work at every couple of days. They either call you for an interview, or tell you to stop calling them. I always got the interview.

>$2-3/hour gruelingly surveys on amazon turk

They should rename that shit 'Amazon Pajeet'.

Lie on your resume about not working for so long?

Hey Bro
HRGuy here
Post your CV, let us see what you have going for you. Also, post the job offers you have been applying to.

Woah, wrote this in a fit of depressive rage before sleeping as stress relief and woke up to a lot of responses.

I'm trying to find some local jobs now and I'll keep at it, I'll look into volunteer work as well (are there sites for stuff like that? Or is that just something I just have to find around my neighborhood).

You're probably right but I don't know how to make a good resume without the advice of others. I am mostly following a consensus of points about resumes.
It should be 1-2 pages max, experience should descend from newest to oldest. Short concise points of what you did at each individual jobs, etc..

As for lying about my resume, I'm too scared to try that because I fear if found out will fuck up everything. The closest thing I did as a lie was about being an MTG judge at a store for 3 years. It's true but I didn't mention anything about the events I was administrating were about a children's card game.

Sorry, thought I wrote it somewhere, it was more of a rant so I just wrote anything that came to mind.
Computer Information Specialist.

Never thought about that, assumed they'd just find it as a sign of someone annoying and not want to hire such an individual.

It's fucking terrible but it is the only 'consistent' money I can find online.

Thanks to everyone who posted, it's really sappy, but it does make me happy to wake up to so many suggestion and advice.

You, waiting here

This is why America needs trade schools...

Not everybody is meant to be a doctor/engineer/manager.

Automated self driving cars or not, the world will always need wrench monkeys to fix them...

This is why I never socialize

People are crazy

community colleges have certificate programs that essentially function as inexpensive trade schools. there are actually a lot of job placemant programs in america from my experience.

>Actually arguing with a co-worker

Go to a store you would like to work at, ask to speak to the manager and tell them you're interested in working for them... shit gets wonky when all you do is apply via online portals and all a manager has to do is click 'delete'

>assumed they'd just find it as a sign of someone annoying
Some do, some don't. Even if they all do, would you be in any worse position?

It's as if... you don't want a job

Habitat for Humanity is always looking for volunteers. Looks good on your resume because they are so well known.