Put out a bait ad for the position I want

>put out a bait ad for the position I want
>expect people to send in their resume so I can steal the good bits to add to mine
>they are literally all abysmal

I guess .. uh.. my resume wasn't so bad after all?

post some more

Should fix the typo though.

How can someone think they'll get a job with a resume like that?

Pic related, it's mine. Not great but a damn sight better than the one OP posted.

...

>why don't they have languages on their resume

That's not too bad. This is better than my resume...

hope you're trolling

>rewrite your objective
>remove WPM
>IT expertise and MS Office should be in one line, rewrite

>your special skills are really common in the real world

just list things that make you stand out, like a programming language or some neet program or something. Jesus christ, rewrite all the way to experience and remove those dots, lines or whatever it is between every word

>remove wpm
>when i'm going for typing jobs
>and i'm faster than 99% of other typists

plus pretty sure those dots only appear on my version of word. when employer opens it they don't see them.

been offered every job i've interviewed for bro. not going too bad with this one.

absolutely awful. staright into the trash.

you put minimum effort into your CV so why would I expect you to put anything other than minimum effort into your job?

what job though?

Any halfway decent employer would recognise my talents. You can't, so I wouldn't want to work for you anyway.

Just office/legal/typing type stuff. Nothing yugely successful.

this is Veeky Forums so I judge CVs accordingly. For a typing job I'd say its still 5/10 because of the layout and some shit.

Thank god the employer don't care about that where you live.

>all employers are as picky about layouts instead of substance as you are
>implying you're even an employer

employers don't actually go over your resume, the HR department does. Are you saying women don't judge based on appearance?

But that goes for large businesses. The one you're at probably isn't. Too bad the world's come to the point where layout is more important than substance, I agree, but this is where we're at.

>Any halfway decent employer would recognise my talents

you might have the right skills but with a shit attitude those skills aren't worth much. this is literally the interview equivalent of turning up late, in casual clothes with bad odour.

for better or for worse, appearance matters. it would take around 20 minutes to make your CV presentable and yet you choose not to. you are telling all of your potential employers that you are lazy.

Not everyone works for giant conglomorates.

I get your point though. But if you were really in HR, chucking a resume in the trash because teh margins are wrong or the font isnt to your liking is bad for business.

Now if they list Veeky Forums in their hobbies on the other hand... into the circular file it goes.

>it would take around 20 minutes to make your CV presentable and yet you choose not to
It's already more than presentable. Would you prefer if I added some word art? Maybe some nice fancy margins and a custom font?

it's the bare minimum. it shows that you don't really care. that's all im saying here.

if you want to get an advantage just spend a while making it look professional.

You still haven't said what's wrong with it.

Is this a troll thread or is this really what the average resume looks like? Shit, I put more effort into my resume freshman year of high school than these fucks.

> hurr why can't I get a job
> economy so shit right now
> surely it can't have anything to do with the fact that a fourth grader could've made a better resume in notepad

Most resumes are read by a machine and not a person, amigo.

its no use trying to explain this to the millennial. it has been trained since birth to attribute all of its failures to the world around it. the millennial sincerely believes that putting effort into anything is 'fascist' nor does it want to 'work for fascists'. attempt to de-program it if you will but it has been expertly indoctrinated.

>chucking a resume in the trash because teh margins are wrong or the font isnt to your liking is bad for business.

literally makes no difference when there are 1000 applicants for every position

is he white? he seems pretty white