So, I had an idea for beer companies to profit enormously from. It seems to be a prerogative of everyone involved with Islam, to be an intolerant, tight-arsed cunt who can't sit back and relax every once in awhile because "no, no, some giant Gamecube and a book with moon runes told me not to."
What's the solution, you may ask? Well, it's simple.
Halal beer.
Get a beer company to start making amusing and convincing advertisements that the alcohol these stuck-up Muslims is drinking is actually "halal" and that it's okay to stop being a cunt once in awhile, and that's a market of BILLIONS OF PEOPLE they can tap into.
Calling something halal doesn't make it halal. Are you retarded?
Jonathan Sullivan
muslims arnt allowed to drink alcohol.
Jonathan Kelly
My post is halal. How does that make you feel?
Adrian Hall
Yes OP,
What could those Muslim clerics possibly do to stop you?
Cameron Perez
>muslims >following islamic rules
Noah Fisher
If they aren't following the rules then calling it halal won't make a difference. If they are, they aren't drinking alcohol. OP's plan is like trying to sell bacon to Jews by stamping a star of david on each strip.
Adrian Brooks
Clerics can only cast defensive spells, so I'll just hand them a halal beer I brewed and they can either accept it or grumble in frustration.
>start making amusing and convincing advertisements that the alcohol these stuck-up Muslims is drinking is actually "halal"
Are you 12, or 15? Seriously, I'm getting fucking sick of the blatant underage posting. The word 'retarded' doesn't seem to be enough to express how dumb some posts are anymore.
Michael Sanders
>OP's plan is like trying to sell bacon to Jews by stamping a star of david on each strip
Austin Hall
>The word 'retarded' doesn't seem to be enough to express how dumb some posts are anymore.
And yet, there are one billion people who worship a guy who fucked his nine-year-old wife. Crazy fucking world, hey?
Luis Campbell
Firstly you don't even know what you're insulting which is of no surprise being underage as fuck, he's a messenger he's not worshiped. Secondly, what does that have to do with your children's idea akin to 'print more money and be rich'? Some people worship a warlord pedo, a bronze-age Palestinian, Emperor Selassie, a fat Asian guy, what does that have to do with your dumb shit, unless you're just stating you're another kind of idiot.
Please don't visit this site anymore. I'm sure you have some homework to do right now.
Jeremiah Bennett
Why don't we just call the brand "Halal"
You get both dumb muslims, and rednecks who want to insult the buttfucker prophet.
Angel Garcia
I know you are upset, but please, for the sake of your family, DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT blow yourself up. You have so much to live for, I know you feel upset, but it's better to just take a deep breath, and let it out. Eat a bacon sandwich, and drink some beer, it will calm you down nice and quickly.
Logan Robinson
I'm an American atheist. I know you're coming to Veeky Forums to try and e-toughen up, but seriously fuck off back to Plebbit or 9fag. I want you cunts dead.
Lucas Scott
>a bronze-age Palestinian Jesus lived in the iron age.
>a fat Asian guy The Buddha was Indian and he was an ascetic.
Grayson Rivera
...
Connor Morris
So uh... I take it nobody likes my idea, then?
Benjamin James
this is a great idea, considering Muslims are mostly stupid it will work for at least initially
Ethan Williams
Watch them blow up your distilleries when they find out.
Nathan Hernandez
Legally, couldn't you declare yourself grand imam or whatever their pope equivalent is and make up rules on what is halal?
Caleb Lopez
Why would they listen to someone who hasn't even committed the entire Quran to memory?
Ryan Edwards
Alcohol isn't halal and there are just a few instances where the Muslim world turns a blind eye for the sake of custom.
People joke a lot about extremists trying to hurt you or damage your property, but if you try this in any eastern country especially as a westerner something bad will happen to you.
Christian Evans
>white guy declares himself pope of all muslims. tells all muslims to drink his halal beer. muslims dont lynch him
Daniel Cruz
Except that the followers of this particular religion are among the most devout you can find.
If you really want them to drink beer, you'd have to make it alcohol-free. That's just fucking soda.
Jonathan Peterson
You're a fuckin idiot, it's specifically prohibited to drink in islam, and no amount of marketing is going to change that.
Alexander Howard
>implying that jews across the world don't have bacon and eggs for sunday brunch Good goy, you've bought into the myth of the observant Jew.
Jaxson Torres
>OP's plan is like trying to sell bacon to Jews by stamping a star of david on each strip.
Ryan White
I like it, it probably won't work. But at least you're thinking in the right way.
