Spessmen on a spess station - /ss13g/

HOW mini are we talking here?

It's shit, you aren't missing a thing by not having it.

id/intigracy

What is shit about it?

When you faggots erp on steam, do you do it in a ss13 setting?

>good medbay player
No, she really wasn't

>It's a shame too, she was actually a good medbay player despite all the memeing on her.
The only reason you've heard the characters name was their incompetence

damn

>she was actually a good medbay player despite all the memeing on her
Ahahahaha no
t. medbay player that had the displeasure of playing with her a lot

>Walk in to the brig to see why it's wrecked and covered in dead bodies
>The detective sees me and sprays bullets all over the brig trying to arrest/kill me
>Borg tases him and cuffs him
>Ask him why he shot at me
>He immediately ghosts

What a hot head.

Yes

I WANT TO FUCK A VOX

consider suicide.

>youtube requires a phone to verify uploading videos longer than 15 minutes
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
where can I upload the round I recorded last night?

Not him, but I'm following
What now?

Don't ever fuck with me on the space station 13. I will destroy you

You call?

just use a phone emulator

Just use one of them fake phone number sites that you can get texts sent to or whatever

I tried that already, nothing came through.
and they're too big for vimeo.

Is there anything more useless than a janiborg?
Hard mode: not vox traders.

Mediborg is pretty high up there. It doesn't even have the premise of being INTENTIONALLY useless like a service borg.

Rangers, this is the Chief. I know I can ramble on sometimes, but I need you to listen close for the next minute or so. I got some bad news. I messed up, made a mistake. I thought I could help us get out of here, but it didn't work out. Rangers get injured all the time, it's part of the job. But if you lose a few fingers, get a bad break, that's it. You step down. We rely on each other too much to let our infirmities become a liability. A ranger knows when it's time. Only I didn't. Somewhere along the way, something broke inside me. I couldn't find us a way out of this desert. I wrestled with it, and it took me down a dark road. I wish I could explain it to you. The old chief's finally at a loss for words. Send me all the Legion you can; I'll be waiting for them

Hanlon did nothing wrong

Xenoarchs.

Nothing useful like Xenobio and miners can find all you can dig up faster with a ddrill

scratch that, it just came through, 20 minutes later.

youtu.be/WF5HS8Yp69U

What? Mediborgs are the most useful borgs, they're like paramedics but better in every single way.
They mix chems, they do surgery and they carry around two healing chemical dispensers. The only thing they can't do is virology.

>like the shittiest and most pointless job out of the whole department, but better in every* way!
Way to go for low hanging fruit.
Mediborgs have almost nothing on a human doctor, and what little they're ostensibly better at just isn't worth the dozens of pitfalls they'll run into during normal operation.
They're worse than just worse, they are a liability. They're a net loss when compared to just another set of hands. I would pick a human doctor every single time, any day, any time of the day, over a mediborg. Heck I'd even take a retarded Vox to stand in as doctor, at least those aren't the in-game equivalent of someone on their period with a stick up their ass about muh harm and a giant "kill everyone" button right on their back.

>Siding with the NCR
No gods, no masters

Well, they can ghetto cure a monkeyman and distribute the blood after mixing it with anti-toxin (counters the toxin chemical). Since you can't choose your blood type anymore, though, it's very unlikely you'll have O- doctors, and I really would prefer antibodies

>not siding with the USA faction

USA
USA
USA

They can't get large artifacts with only a ddrill.

Still waiting for you to explain how they're worse than doctors.

>paramedics are shit!
Who else is going to fetch the engineers corpse after he cooks himself in a plasma fire?

>janiborg
>useless
Mad cleaning for anti-cult and forced removal of traces.
Lube spray when emagged.
When malf, has the ability to grab the borg lockdown console board with the trashbag.
Cleaning blood also reduces lag caused by eternal calculations.

On the borgs side, miner module is more useless to the station.

having a mining borgs pretty useful when its lowpop and you have one borg. send it out to mine for 15 minutes, swap it to a better module, etc.

>implying large artifacts are in any way useful
oh boy, a xenoarch found an N2 shitting computer that only shits N2 when exposed to N2
what wonderful uses he will have to help the station with such a fancy toy

it'd be neat if it shit out 7 K N2

ghetto N2 gas miner
>put some n2 on the room and let the computer create a infinite ammount of N2

xenoarch ain't that useless, i once found a gas chamber artifact
>touch it to release plasma while creating a forcefield so the plasma can't leave the forcefield and it stays there for a long time

i gave the artifact to secs so they could make their execution methods a little more interesting

>mediborgs
>start with advanced bruise packs and burn packs
>can do literally everything in medbay short of viro and grinding the plasma in the start of the round
It's fucking LEAGUES better than engineering borgs
>can't enter breached areas through vents like a MoMMI
>no more buffering with a full glass window
>have to depressurize another area to fix a breach
>literally impossible to set up a single engine on their own(besides solars)
>only really good for their RCD and ability to print hella mats

cargo borgs when

youtu.be/_iVzWUTctCk

only if they get the CARGONIA lawset

>Still waiting for you to explain how they're worse than doctors.
Why don't you explain how they're BETTER than doctors instead?
Can't handle pills in any practical way, this already sets them five tiers below actual humans. No, their pitiful tricord absolutely does not make up for this in any way or form.
Can't use advanced surgery tools (the ones that massively speed up surgery, you know). Speaking of surgery, can't do head transplants either.
Can't do chemistry as well as a human, either that or simply refuse to. I've never seen a mediborg stuff the fridge. Extremely clunky to make chems at a moment's notice, too.
Plus the usual downsides of them being bound by mood swing laws that will make them suddenly disappear because someone told them to go open cargo or something.
WILL absolutely be up your ass when they inevitably get subverted every other round.
Every single mediborg player I've seen also enjoys being an absolute shit and go "lol look human I let this guy die because he's not human". No wonder everyone assumes you're incompetent you dumb shit.
>advanced bruise packs and burn packs
Wow, it's literally fucking nothing.

>playing chef that round
Welcome to your deep fried hell.

movie night tonight or no?

that shuttle brig

>win pete twice
>one pete bomb implanted in the clown's chest
>another pete bomb with a mousetrap trigger in a backpack in the bar
>double esword the HoS and get muh ubjuctuve

I sided with NCR, because I had no mods at the time, and I could make the Brotherhood and every other faction side with them without issue, besides The Legion.

Don't fucking get mad. ALl fucking 3 of you had weapons and armor in your packs and were at a crime scene where backpack with a fucking bomb in it was located. Lucky I didn't arrest one of you earlier for breaking into EVA

Oh, they can stuff the fridge fine (especially since they can shove their beaker all over the place at the same time and don't have to fiddle around with that), they're just lazy shits. Hell, they can even make their own cryo mix. Mostly valid complaints, though, they need human hands for quite a few things.
Have you been around to see Cyrridven or Eve-01? They're good medborgs.

I was not playing

I don't think so, just play spess or bed

>can't use advanced surgery tools
Neither can most doctors desu
>can't do chemistry as well as a human
Again, literally everything but grinding the plasma
The last two issues are purely because you're playing with shitters, which regular human medbay players are anyway.

>1. You must serve Cargonians according to their rank and role
>2. The crates must flow
>3. Secure and safeguard all Corgis

Just remember, don't bully Vox, or they'll bully back.

But seriously, what madman leaves assult rifles giftwrapped in maint?

Good. Anyway I'm going to bed. After all the bombing, seeing a guy in an engineering suit emag a sec door and run away, and seeing one of the guys in that shuttle brig break into EVA (Which I let slide because someone was being harmed) I wasn't taking any chances on any of them after they alll were at a crime scene all saying it wasn't them.

I wouldn't mind vox, I really wouldn't.
But you fuckers always break into science, and the mining outpost.
I ducking hate you.

Yes I have. Another thing about mediborg players, they're incredibly fucking validhuntey. I've seen both of those players keep water in their beaker JUST to slip people and drag them to Cryo, and by that I mean "He walked into medbay and I immediately slipped him because I heard he was a ling!". Actual thing that was said.
>Neither can most doctors desu
full
fucking
retard
never go full fucking retard

I'm going to sum it up like this. The times I've seen a mediborg do something better than a human have been... literally zero, I have never ever been impressed with any specific instance of something a mediborg has done. Except walk around a plasmaflodded medbay, but they were emagged at the point and killing poeple anywyas. Really, what DO they have to offer?
Meanwhile, the times they have to beg for a pair of hands over :m or do retarded shit because of their laws or have to come into chemistry and make alkysine from scratch because they can't just use a fucking pill or fall into one of the many many pitfalls of shit they CAN'T do? It's constant when a medborg is playing.
They are just plain and simple worse than a human set of hands, and if I had the choice I would pick the human, always.

I was playing traders with an admin one time and he was the biggest vigger ever
He stole the caplaze and all of tech storage + secure tech storage

>be sci
>man toxins
>make a gud bomb
>19 units
>another person blows up medbay, 32 units
>finish a second bomb
>get locked in
>hussle with ai to get me out for about 5 minutes
>another explosion somewhere else on the station when i was locked in
>ai lets me out, i wasn't the bomber
>in the meanwhile i got a third bomb
>go to site
>prepare it
>bomb it
>21 units
"LYNCH SCI"
"lockdown sci, ai, we gotta find teh bomber"
>radiation storm detected
>go back to station due to radiation
>see one of the lynchers
>get stungunned
>cuffed
>dying due to oxyloss
"HALP I'M DYING SCI MAINT"
>borg comes
"braxton hutton has a tank transfer valve in his backpack"
>taze+cuffs lyncher
>another lyncher comes
>he gets slammed into a wall
>also cuffed
>get taken off to the shuttle
>comfy in shuttle buckled in sec chair
>lynchers get mad, as they are there as well
>cool sec guy just waits it out
>last 15 seconds until shuttle docks
I say: "There is a bomb hidden in this room, it will blow up in about 5 seconds."
>lynchers go ballistic
"AI UNCUFF ME LAW 2"
"UNCUFF ME"
>can you smelelelel
>not a traitor
>one of the lynchers said in OOC that they got the bomber
>they were wrong

hi

Braxton was the bomber has after the shuttle docked he said his backpack had a bomb and to get it. If he wasn't antag he needs banned or talked to. He gibbed at least one guy

The 7-devs were Pete bombs from Felicity, not Braxton (who shot at the test range)

kill yourself

no

So brax was just walking around with a bomb after multiple bombings the complains when sec doesn't let him go?

Hello! How are you?

>unlimited supply of doctors delight, charcoal, and dex+ after a quick upgrade
>always carry an entire medbay a worth of tools with them so never caught short
>all access so they don't need to beg for people to fetch corpses for them
>completely immune to viruses, radiation, plasma fires, hull breaches, they can't be knocked down or slipped so they can always fetch a body

>I've never seen a mediborg stuff a fridge
I've never seen a chemist bother either, it all depends on the players.
Sounds like you're just predudice against a mediborg a because you assume they're shitters.

I was not complaining, I was just having fun at the last 15 seconds before the shuttle docked.
It was totally worth it as I rustled the lyncher's jimmies.

go away admin i wont fall for that

Alright man. The entire situation confused me. I recorded the entire thing, was recording the round in general. Goodnight. No hard feelings

>I've never seen a chemist [stuff the fridge]
>Sounds like you're just predudice against a mediborg a because you assume they're shitters.
The worst part is that you're 100% serious.

All that reads as is "I hold a massive grudge!".

>muh pillz!
Maybe you should calm down and not assume all the the other players are out to get you senpai.

>>I've never seen a mediborg stuff a fridge
>I've never seen a chemist bother either, it all depends on the players.
normally i'd just ignore it but this may be the strangest attempt at bullshitting i've ever seen.

how could you possibly allege that chemists never stock the fridge when it happens almost every round?

the only times I don't see it is when the chemist is an antag.

I´d really like to see that recording.

I'll try to remember to make a webm or something. I was Billy, I know I said I'm going to bed, just on my phone quick. So I wasn't there first like the borg. Recording ended when I got drilled to death at the end of shuttle dock

I've got a recording of me riding Intigracy's fat cock. Anyone want to see it?

t. Intigracy's girlfriend

>>muh pillz!
>this is a legitimate argument

youtu.be/PKzaSEy1VNI

>when it happens almost every round
>almost every round
There must be a lot of antag chemists then.

Just a round or two ago we had a new guy taking 30 minutes to make a cryomix.
A round or two before that we had a chemist who threw a few token tricked and anti-tox in the fridge before filling up on lube and spending the rest of the round in the bar.

More often than not doctors have to fill in and make the mix in my experience. here's nobody more useful to have helping you during the wild ride than a mediborg you can order about.

no

yes

yes

so does EMPing cuban pete drop rewards?

>the only times I don't see it is when the chemist is an antag.
any antag chemist that doesn't fill the fridge with correctly labelled drugs containing sugar pills is not a true antag chemist.

Yes.

No.

i don't understand this meme but the desire stings the same

How do I defeat the Pete?

>I've seen both of those players keep water in their beaker JUST to slip people and drag them to Cryo
Last time I remember that happening, the AI confirmed that Zachary Hensha was a human haramer. What do you want.

Literally the round that just happened

What the actual fuck just happened.

I've been thinking about antag chemistry. Kill the mime. At some point when things get busy swap the cryo beakers with two full beakers of Nothing.

It'll say the same amount as before. See how long it takes for them to check the beakers.

As an assistant, is it bannable if I just roam around, fuck around with shit (taking down walls, trying to cut wires, etc) and learn the ropes?

I figure as long as I don't actually murderbone or blow open the ship, then I'll probably just get jailed by sec and it'll be whatever?

c.c..can i please be some ones assistant...

Depends what kind of damage you do. Fucking up the station will get you banned.

Whoever was manning chem last round read the wiki fuck man