Florida thread

Share your Veeky Forums related batshit insane stories frm Florida.

wtnh.com/2016/05/16/turtle-crashes-through-womans-windshield-on-florida-interstate/

I've lived in Florida my entire, worthless life

The shit I've seen...

The only raisin that I haven't been declared at fault for a few accidents is because of a dashcam

People here are fucking brain dead
>stomp the brakes and then roll forward to the red light
>hogging the left lane
>no inspection on shitboxes
>driving while staring at a cell phone

Recently I've been traveling a lot in the right lane because of peoples propensity for immediately getting into the left lane and then doing 10 under

Fuck this whole state
I feel like I'm the only person here who gives a shit when I drive

And FUCK driving a miata on the highway
Shit is asking for death-by-redneck

Can't wait to die

>>no inspection on shitboxes
>implying this is a bad thing

>driving to a friend's house in Miami
>3 lane road
>me in the middle lane, somebody in a BMW crossover on my right
>intersection comes up
>the BMW swerves in front of me, no signals
>almost rear ends me
>just rushes thier ass over to the left turn lane with no indication whatsoever
>see who's driving as I pass
>some mom, texting on her phone, with a kid in the back seat
>mfw

tbqh no inspections is a plus
At least I won't get fucked of my car like in Commiefornia

I don't mind the other things about this state, but FUCK the drivers. Seriously, 1/3 of the people in Miami should have their licenses revoked for the shit I see them do.

>hogging the left lane
>doing ten under in the left lane

No wonder Hull Street is such shit, take your faggots back

>not knocking on their windows or at least reporting their license plate to the police

our craigslist is pretty bad too, i've found some decent stuff that isnt overpriced but only after literal weeks of shifting through utter unusable garbage

I never had a bad experience with living in Florida. I always had a bad experience living in New Jersey, Texas, California, Maryland, and South Carolina.. never had a bad experience in Florida.

Old people are slow but predictable. Drivers in the other states are not (sans Maryland) predictable at all.

>I am mad that my state is God's waiting room: the post

I like Florida but we have shit roads

I'm not mad at all, and yeah there are a lot of old people but honestly I prefer them to crazy spics and dumb wops.

>Floridenial

How? I'm genuinely curious. Between growing up all over the country, and moving all over the place personally after enlisting, Florida drivers aren't nowhere near as bad as people say they are. Not the best, but nowhere close to the worst.

>In a Facebook post, a shell-shocked Bjanes

People here are particularly susceptible to complete stupidity. Typical Florida shit. Rednecks in "Roll Coal" lifted trucks. Old people everywhere. Driving during winter months is a nightmare because the entire state of Indiana traveled for better weather. Low cost of life draws the dumbest of the dumb to live here.

My most recent Craigslist trip
>go to check out a civic
>overpriced as fuck but low miles
>paint has been recalled, looked great in pics
>meet total dudebro swagsurfer
>i'll leave the 12's in the trunk for an extra hunned
>car covered in dents and paint chips on every face
>visible paint marking lines on A pillar and edge of hood
>clear coat on roof is trashed
>clutch fluid is where
>several days pass
>hey bro I totally got a super low offer like way lower than I had thought, I'll discount you 3k thats a totally fair price brah

How should I respond?

>How should I respond?
this.

Low cost of life?
Unless you live in the middle of the empty center of FL, places like Miami are expensive as fuck.

>Florida Car Life

All Lexus vehicles are overpriced by 33%

Subarus are legitimately rare.

bump for insanity

I was expecting Florida Man stories.

Tell him that if he lets you shit in his open mouth, you'll graciously take it off his hands

I had to wait at an intersection for a mile long covered wagon train to cross. That's right, fucking horse drawn conestoga wagons. Somewhere on 441, mid state.

Post your favorite Florida scenic drives.

Over the road trucker here.

Florida highways are GOAT. Super smooth, always, compared to the rest of the country.

>be croozing down a 2 lane road
>nigress riding my ass in a nigged-out 300c
>doing like 15 over and still 2 feet from my bumper
>troll-mode activated
>slow down to 20 for every school zone and actually do like 15
>do exactly the speed limit
>2 lane becomes 4 lane
>im in right lane
>she swerves to the left lane to be first at the red light I have like 3 cars in front of me
>light turns green and she instantly turns right in front of traffic

This is a day in the life of a Floridian.

cr419 in deer park

>tfw pinellas county driver
>only good road to cruise on is Gulf Blvd.

Anyone else in the same boat?

Florida roads are honestly great. Too bad there are way too many idiots on the nice roads here.

I learned to drive in Florida, and then left the state for a fruitless several or more years in the military. People in Florida drive exactly like they do in the Middle East. Probably because Middle Easterners go to Florida to open gas stations.

From like Clearwater Beach down to St Pete Beach?

I drive that route every now and then (I might hit it up tonight, too) but I always run into tailgaters and shit.

There is a similar road over on the east coast, the leads out to Jensen Beach. Super curvy, but it runs through a neighborhood right on the beach and dead ends in a gated community. The only way to actually have fun on the road is to go at like 3AM and creep to the back.

Unfortunately, Mexicans have started smoking weed out there pretty regularly so cops also like to chill on the road.

>polk county
man the lakeland/plant city area is so pretty
shame about the drivers

>tfw 239

Drive on university everyday. Literally have seen more crashes in a week than the months I stayed in Maryland

holy shit, I was down there for a few weeks and I have never seen so many accidents and people getting arrested before.

University blvd? Like by ucf? Sup ucf bro, I drive university every day. Do little tire squeels sometimes at red lights because no power for burnouts.