/ss13g/ - Spessmen on a Spess Station

Hand gun antag item for mime. Its a revolver that looks like a pair of white gloves and can be placed in the gloves slot as well as not making a sound when fired.

>Engineering

stolen

why do we have so many garbage borg sprites?

>team up with a doctor on a prayer adventure
>we need to get booty for the pirate skeleton god
>we acquire silver, gold and rum from the vault
>offer it to the skelegod
>our prayers are answered and we turn into pirate skeletons
>pirate ship crashes into the station full of skeletons
>detective drags me to the brig to question me for 20 minutes about breaking into the vault
>literally wont let me go even when the pirates invade the station
>mfw he made me miss the whole pirate bus i worked for because he wanted to roleplay dirty harry

youtube.com/watch?v=gZ_qJ7esLZo

>Be skeleton
>Have peg legs
>Get surgery for legs
>They are human legs
>Oh
>Pray to the Skeleton Gods of Old for bone legs
>Rattle Me Bones answers my prayers
>Bone legs
>Become a pirate to pay him back
Get into boxing match for gold
>Bartender kills me with laser from outside the ring
>Drags me somewhere and takes my pirate clothes off
>I have failed Rattle Me Bones
>Pray the Rattle Me Bones one more time
>He says I will be called on soon
>Get teleported to cloning in full pirate gear
>YAR HAR
>Sec officer drags me out of cloning and into the morgue
>Sit in morgue rest of round because I do not want to be a bother to rattle me bones

I regret smashing myself in that shard so much

>Nothing for most of the shift
>Suddenly OHFUCK pirate ship crashes into the chapel
>Station's getting swarmed with pirate skeletons
>No buildup, just suddenly fuck

Well that was something

>literally following you shittiers for half the round
>finally get you in for questioning
>"not gunna say nuffin'"
>would have fucking let you go if you gave me a single fucking name
>end up releasing you anyways because you would have ahelped it if I hurt you
you brought it upon yourself, zipperlip

inject plasma into a cigar

How did you put that apc in space? Don't they need to be made in a room via blueprints and that being airtight?

>Make a body double using a monkeyman with the help of the CMO
>Ling kills and replaces me
>Proceeds to act nothing like me
>Nobody noticed a thing.

Karma's a real bitch to me sometimes.

>play QM to fulfill the needs of the station
>no miners so I go do that instead
>no diamonds so I stay out looking
>still no diamonds so I stay out longer
>pop my lungs trying to make a jetpack work and head back
>get robot lungs
>go through surgery to get them in, then again because I can't breath
>what feels like a half hour later go into surgery a third and final time to finally get working lungs
>cargo's a mess and get raided right after I get back
>say screw it and make a bar in escape because it looks like the shuttle's about to get called
>pirates land right when I start making drinks
>make grog to appease our new pirate overlords
>they get smoked
>no one drinks my drinks, they just break everything

Oh well.

They did notice.

Should've let me (the RD) set up your lungs. I was bored and replaced my AFK roboticist's lungs and eyes in like a minute.

Use glass to make an room then use your mommi blueprints/station blueprints. You can remove the glasses after it.

I thought you gave me my lungs then ran off, so I went to have the doctors do it.

Today i got my bombs up to 31

It was pretty chaotic, I might have missed it.

It was pretty surreal watching "me" though.

>tfw only a 22 babby
Any hint?

rule zero sj

use a gas mixer to make a canister full of %90 oxygen and %10 plasma then cool that down to 73.15

Daily Reminder Willy II did everything wrong.

Was Company Mod ever updated? Or did he drop it at 1.0

I drank two full glasses of grog before DEEP DANGER killed me for no god damn reason

>pouring acid on someone's head who has been turned into a horse temporarily fixes it

Duh

So hows the colonial marines new serb? Heard a new one without the shit mods was made, is it actually surviving or nah?

I wasn't able to connect earlier and when I played last night there was barely anyone on and we mostly played Hunter Games and a round of traitor

To fail the Minimize Casualties objective, I believe you have to personally deal the killing blow to at least 4 people - unless they've changed it since I looked.

>Ironically, spacing my target spared him the massacre and got him successfully revived
Dammit Joey

>Deff two times in a row

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

How does the game track a killing blow?

Every mob has a list variable called kills. It contains pointers to each person you kill.

Thus, the game tracks a killing blow in the form of a list variable.

It doesn't, because it's fucking impossible in a game like this. Minimize Casualties can't even fail, I think.
The Vox Raiders Inviolate objective literally counts dead people even if they never even saw the Vox.

The one that puts you above 200 damage.

No, you're wrong, minimize casualties
>1. Can be failed, it was failed last round. Read the game end info!
>2. Doesn't just count anyone, it specifically checks your killed variable. That's why it's so hard to fail - subverting borgs and flooding plasma and setting off bombs do not add to the list

that's not only wrong but it doesn't even answer his question

>Get my head bashed in the moment I step back on the station with my box of rezadone pills
>Sit there REEEEEEEING ethereally for the rest of the round
>tfw that feeling of relief when the few survivors who were able to chase off two borgs built a robotic console in the mechanic's office
>They blow every single cyborg
>IAA and paramedic beat the shit out of the guy who set the silicons on a killing spree when the MMI in the locker started screaming his head off where they were

What a fucking shit show.

That's how RNG works

Nah, it's right. Check yo facts.

Scroll ALL THE WAY DOWN

github.com/d3athrow/vgstation13/blob/131f5659fcf14df6f795d585ff833ba1dfca90fe/code/game/gamemodes/objective.dm

>still no round start slime race

You Can rule 0 three people, who do you choose?

Myself, Sawbones and Yahir.

Yred, Kavlax and Cyrridiven

i'd activate code delta and assume control over reica carter any day!

Nobody except like dylan, nexis, and pomf know how solars actually work. To the rest it's just that old thing nobody uses.

It wont be the real deal cause there's 3 things to do in lowpop. Do sphess research which is hampered by crampt facilities with pipes getting in the way fucking everywhere, autism fort which is hampered by the lack of space and supplies to do autism with, and lowpop murderboning as spare id captain vs nosec nohead station.

There's a reason giacomm's ministation, taxi, bus, and more were shit.

When you youtube.com/watch?v=t8cELTdtw6U

Phazon's great for civs. Take tesla, melee armor, rcd, and either the shotgun or the immolator. You can fix breaches, cuck spooder/xenos, and go anywhere with phasing. While power is up you'll slow your power loss and since you have a phazon, you'll be able to bag of holding a backpack of hyper cells and box a bluespace beaker of fuel so as long as you phase away you can repair and re-power yourself back up.

Honk's the ghetto phazon. It's cheap to make a bunch of, give it the honker, the DDrill, and pilot's choice depending on your preferred loadout. God anywhere and you got a high dodge rate to offset your dogshit health. If nothing else it keeps you from getting corner neuro'd and come out slinging the lascannon from your reactive teleport armor.

Everyone you pda to come by. It's a problem with geneticists are ignorant muhpowers toe the line griefers over people not wanting to get backed up

If you assembly line plasglass spears, cannons, blunderbuss, bucklers and use closets and flipped table forts for cover it's amazing. One day I'll have a successful revolution of golem legionaries and crew minutemen.

Cut cameras, move the apc and setup field generators. They can't get in without killing themselves or actually knowing how to be a wet blanket

I'm none of those people and I know exactly how it works, that's why I was complaining

how do you make plasma glass again?
how much two handed damage does it do?

Smelter or recycling settings
29 if you gitgud. 3 stabs and bleed oxyloss takes the rest. Bonus if you sever hands.

yred is cyrri

solars?
At least the basics are that it spins following a number sun, and it must not be obstructed.

...

Oh shit we finally got a new game type, has anyone played it yet?

Alright Veeky Forums, I finally tried this game as of yesterday. So far I've been Quartermaster, Cargo Tech, Paramedic, Chef and just plain ol' Assistant and been slowly figuring things out, but the learning curve still feels daunting. Everything is so god damn unintuitive and clunky. I constantly read the wiki while I play and ask people for help in-character, I'm really trying here. It took me over a minute to figure out how to take a cigarette out of the box, light and smoke it; I'm constantly fighting the interface to get basic shit done.

When I rolled Chef, thought it would be easy, but couldn't even figure out how to make rice. I tried putting raw mice in the microwave, I tried putting it into a beaker THEN the microwave, like do I need to put water in it first? Yeah I read the wiki, still couldn't figure it out. What kind of fucking game makes cooking a bowl of rice so god damn cryptic.

Well it didn't matter much, almost everyone got killed by some ball of lightning a few minutes later. The only time I've had fun is doing shit I'm not supposed to do, not exactly griefing, but just goofing off. This game intrigues me, but right now it feels like I'm swimming through a lake of liquid shit without any idea of what's ahead.

I doubt it
Right when it was merged, they tried to force it a few times, but it kept failing
I guess there weren't enough players readied up who had rev enabled or something

> I guess there were too many players self-banned from rev or something

FTFY

Keep trying. You'll learn eventually.
We all managed it and many of us are idiots.

Stick to the jobs where goofing off is overlooked until you get the knack of it. Cargo and assistants are seldom called to do anything and there's a high chance you'll end up swept up in some hijinx or other.

You just need practice. It takes about 3 months until you're reasonably fast and around 9 you hit your stride.

A game that consists of 15 or so years of code written by people who don't know how to code.

Once you get experienced with all the interaction methods, become familiar enough with jobs you'll be able to get in the action.

>Wanted to form an arrivals defense league
>Building fortifications and stockpiling arms and armor
>Couldn't get a single person to join
>Never even a wisp of a chance of repelling sec valids turning into a mutiny then a full blown revolution complete with opposing bases, kidnapping, and a locker room medbay.
Space is truly all about finding hope you never knew you had left and crushing it dead.

>nuke disarmed with 5 seconds to go

ABSOLUTE MADMAN

>We get the disk and put it into the nuke
>Strip naked and start having a party
>Two minutes pass
>Oh shit guys did you remove the disk from the nuke
>No lol

Ahelp, admins care
LOOC is OOC on visual range, use it for gameplay questions to people around.

Adding water to a microwave is done with beakers or a glass of water. Order does not matter. You can empty them glasses with right click.

Cargo is the best for starters. Ctrl+click is the shortcut for dragging.

>mfw I stop the nuke with 5 seconds on the timer

>nuke ops gets memed on with lube then farted on

>Cargo is the best for starters
Why?

Switch to hotkey mode. Youre gimping yourself if you play with arrow keys

Shoutouts to Burroughs and Joey for freeing me from my maintenance prison.

yeah you need 25 ready for rev squad, 4 revs, 3 enemies, and also head roles and such.

1. Basically can't fuck it up, there's an early-shift rush to learn a job but after that you basically have the shift off, usually no one comes

2. Most newbies go here, so people expect newbies in cargo and are more willing to help

3. Teaches you important mechanics like pulling crates and using computers. Since pulling is something almost every job is going to be doing a lot, you want to learn how to ctrl+click things immediately.

do nothing job that teaches you the basics of the UI and no one expects anything of you. Also has a low chance to teach you how guns work

Low demand, open space to fuck up, sense of belonging.

My first job was mining

>humans are fighting for some reason
>and not drinking while doing it
not understand why, silly humans

It was over when the nuke got disarmed and then disappeared

Whoever was the madman who did that was the real champ because apparently the ship nuke and the vault nuke are on different codes. Wish I knew that beforehand so I didn't have to go through the trouble of going back onto the station to get the disk again and instead blew my brains out.

Issac, Random Namer, and Random Namer.

>ctrl+click things
>Been right-clicking and selecting the option this whole time

I probably could've saved like, twenty people if I knew about that.

Jesus Christ.

paramedic is a good first time job too, but you have to actually communicate that you're new and need help
(I started as paramedic)

>9 months to learn this shit
what the fuck man. I learned dwarf fortress in an afternoon, and within 3 days I had already gotten the hang out of it. 9 months? I hope that's not just a gross exaggeration.

there's hotkeys? oh thank fucking god

RIP in peace

>tfw my first job was engineering
>didnt touch singularity for a week
>only made a big antimatter engine I kept refilling
>only set up the singularity and had other engineers make sure it was okay before I turned it on a week after that

spoopy

it's a toggle button on the bottom right hand of the screen.
says "hotkeys"

I felt fully confident in all jobs except xenoarch, head of staff, security officer, and AI after 30 days. Maybe he's just a slow learner.

On the other hand, it's amazing what you can pick up after playing for a long time. One of my favorite players, someone I consider very skilled and one of the only people other than me who can fix telecoms named Probe1 only learned this year how to place glass on a completed grille.

So sometimes things slip through the cracks

>managed to get good at the AME and singularity
>get lynched three times before I figure out the SMES batteries

Been playing for four years and i still learn new things every now and then. I'm curious, what's your username? I want to see how you end up doing.

>These are the people who enable nuke ops
Honestly, need an ops ban

Because I'll smash that window and cave in your stupid fucking face if you give me sass while not doing your job. I need your ID, I don't need you.

>tfw never get to teach a newbie the wonders of bruise pack/ointment, eat some food, and tell them to sleep in the patient room beds until fully healed medical

>tfw a guy comes in to try and bully botany, instead gets meme'd on by botania's firmly erect yellow phallus and is in crit in 2 hits, decapitated, brain scooped out and baked into a cake before sec even shows up
By stride I mean you can go anywhere, know where everything is, do everything and kill for ID's for idlocked stuff, build a telcomms, teleport bodies simply by sight, all construction, deconstruction, mastered the engines, balls deep into misc science for all the doodads, locking/blowing borgs, fixing borgs, able to build mechs, borgs, mommis, and bots by memory, knows medbay and field medicine, headswap and cloning husks, most surgeries, easy to get effective self defense tools in each job for murderboning, etc, etc, etc.

You'll never stop learning even years later but once you get the core experience under your belt and can do it quickly by memory you can really throw yourself into the meat of the round all round every round cause you know where to go what to do and you wont get dunked on doing it.

Should I run a fixing telcomms 101 class some time as AI?
I can even cast explosion!

If I wrote short stories about different jobs, antags and races would you people like it?
No names though. Everyone in the story would be nameless.

Anyone got that sprite sheet for the Martians?