Calls himself an auto enthusiast/hobbyist

>he doesn't own an engine hoist
One time I got really drunk, and used my retard strength to lift an iron block inline 4 out of my engine bay, it still had the crank, and stock flywheel attached. Shit was a good 250lb. I am not a lifter. I had trouble lifting the stripped block when I was sober, the alcohol gave me retard powers.

I've also transported a completely dressed engine in lieu of my passenger seat. Had to manhandle it out of the car. Good thing I'm lowered, pretty much tilted it out, and dropped it out on a floor creeper. Those shitty HF plastic ones can hold a block.

I honestly have no room for a hoist, I borrow one from my friend when I need to actually get an engine in.

So far I accepted delivery of 2 engines, 3SGTE, and a 1JZ a pallet. Manhandled both to home made dollys so I could bench run them, and put them away.

Famn, I new my V6 mustang was fast but I'm faster than corvettes too? Lmao why would any retard get a v8

>He can't drive stick
This is the only thing on this list that actually determines whether you're an auto enthusiast or not, you don't even need to own one, you should just know how

>He can't do a head swap
Fixing cars =/= auto enthusiasm. Drivers don't fix, fixers don't drive

>he takes his car to the shop

See previous

>He can't drop a tranny and change a clutch on jackstands

See above

Also, this is incredibly difficult for most people, and as long as you don't take your car to the dealership it's not super expensive

>He can't diagnose his own problems

Half agree with this. As an auto enthusiast, you should be able to diagnose worn clutches, oil changes, fluid changes, and most serious repairs. But the minor stuff is pretty difficult, like tie rod ends, or pinion seals, a lot of steering related stuff is pretty difficult to diagnose without actually looking at the part

>he doesn't own an engine hoist or heavy duty floor jack

Engine hoist is understandable, everyone should own a good floor jack though

>He's never had a head gasket leak after spending a day putting it together

Head gasket shit is difficult, I wouldn't be surprised if 99.9% of auto enthusiasts have ever had this issue.

>he doesn't own a loud v8 with at least 350whp

I think everyone should own a performance v8 at least once in their life, but not everyone needs to own one yet. a 17 year old can be considered an auto enthusiast but I sure as hell don't want a 17 year old auto enthusiast owning a 350hp v8

>v8

what if im not a massive cuck

>he's never had a head gasket leak after spending a day putting it together

my dual-carb jet ski mag-side carb is dumping gas so hard that it has flooded the crank case with it, and turning it over with the carbs pulled has gunky black shit coming out of the pulse.

Let me start from the beginning:

I spent three fucking days putting everything back into the fucking thing. It was a bare hull, washed and scrubbed with simple green. It was fucking pristine.

Assembly was a bitch, but reaching into the bowels of a small ski is not supposed to be fun. The worst part of the whole thing was getting the tank straps back into the right spot. The engine had been dropped in, the thing aligned with a five foot long sounding rod I use on drunken saturdays, and the driveline put in, lubed, and nearly factory-fresh. New carbon seal, new needle bearing, fresh engine mounts.

I had high hopes when I put on the exhaust manifold. I was ecstatic as I put on the pipe. I was giddy when I woke up the next morning after the insta-gasket used on the manifold had dried. I put on the safety lanyard and pressed the starter button.

A fresh battery could not save me from a dead starter.

Off came the pipe assembly (takes 30 minutes to pull it if you are fast) and the exhaust manifold with fresh insta-gasket (another 30 minutes) to pull the little fucking asshole starter.

Fresh starter in place, exhaust re-assembled, I tried again. This is when reality sunk in.

I pulled the spark plugs and drove down to the auto part store. NGK BR8ES. $3 a pop. With fresh plugs and new starter, only god could stop me. And he did.

140 psi mag cylinder, 125 PTO. My shit has been thoroughly pushed in at this point. One of the freshly-rebuilt mikuni 38s have decided to rebel (read the opening), and I bet the new starter is thinking of waging jihad against the west.

Fuck.

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>calls himself an auto enthusiast/hobbyist
>he can't drive stick
Can
>he can't can do a head swap
I can, I just don't have the equipment for it.
>he takes his car to the shop
Warranty plus lack of tools make it impossible to do any work.
>he can't drop a tranny and change a clutch on jackstands
Never needed to do this.
>he can't diagnose his own problems
I've diagnosed all but 1 issue which was electrical.
>he doesn't own an engine hoist or heavy duty floor jack
College campus won't allow it.
>he's never had a head gasket leak after spending a day putting it together
How is this supposed to be a sign of pride?
>he doesn't own a loud v8 with at least 350whp
That would kill what little money I have left for school. Currently driving a tarbo I4 and I'm enjoying it.

Gonna be honest, I prefer a lot of V6s to V8s.

While the rumble sounds great in a large displacement V8 motor, V6s are often just as if not more powerful and most efficient at what they do.

You do a headswap on a boxer engine with basic tools

>Can Drive stick
>You got me, currently running the stock top, hoping for the best
>Only because I work for a living
>tfw automagic
>...You got me
>;~;
>Worse, supercharger wasn't generating boost because I retarded it
>GP GXP has tree fiddy five HP to the front wheels like God intended

But that's implying that humans can program without creating bugs, which has plagued us for as long as programming was a thing, and it always will be.

H4 > Everything else

>I sure as hell don't want a 17 year old auto enthusiast owning a 350hp v8
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>Large displacement v8
>350bhp

Americans will defend this

That implies that all programs enter the world untested and unproven. Humans can write bug-free code, it just takes a long time, many revisions and a lot of effort.

I didn't imply test free releases of code.
And yes it'll take revisions etc, but bug free code is a statistical anomaly, until then we'd be better off not relying solely on driverless cars.

don't forget to tip your fedora

Are you autistic? you may have undiagnosed tard-strength

>Calls himself an auto enthusiast

>3 cylinder OHC
>8 cylinder OHV

mate 2.5liter I4s are massive.

You exhibit trust for your computer, don't you? As well as your TV, data servers, smartphone, GPS, and other tech in your daily life. Luddites can't put their faith in technology unless it's a monitor in front of them.

I can do ,have and feel all that but I won't. It takes too much time away from my other hobbies. If your too autistic to have other hobbies then I feel sorry for you.

put your VR goggles back on and let the supreme gentlemen handle the real world kid...

It's convenient to go to a mechanic. My window regulator failed. I was driving with it taped shut. It was faster for me to take it there and have it done in an hour than waiting a week for the part to arrive then waste my time dicking around with it all morning all to save 100 bucks and risk a leak for longer.

Except none of those control a box on wheels that goes too fast for evolution to save me from.

>he can only afford to spend under 10k on his car

i drive stick at work all day, im sick of it desu

Only in america.Makes me glad to be glorious slav and driving is a huge part of this country. Driverless cars will never be a thing in my lifetime.
Get fucked americuck

>a wankel with no intake or exhaust
>a turbo engine with none of it's turbo bits
>a complete engine

good comparo, nigger

>he posts frogs

signs of an autistic reddit poster

My new house in the city doesn't have a garage big enough for car work
5 year plan is to build another home with a two car garage and three bay outbuilding.