"So what's your greatest weakness?"

I like to plot out the downfall of people I arbitrarily choose to take a dislike to, particularly coworkers and clients. That's why the last business I worked at folded.

working with minorities and women.

Japanese pornography.

I own less than 1 btc.

My tongue ring always gets caught in pubes dude's pubes.

kek/10

But I have no known weaknesses.

I work too hard

also this

Doing your son.

Probably legs, but I can't really know for sure, since I've never had a leg day

>I care too much

This one so much
also when HR is asking you about your weaknesses, it means its your first job, and they have to fill time of interview with some bullshit

Yeah don't fall for this shit. They have heard the " I am TOO good" weakness a million times.

Think of something you had trouble with, and what you did to overcome it and be specific. The answer that will impress then is an answer about you realizing a problem with your performance, and successfully finding a solution.

This kind of thinking is beyond alot of job seekers. Don't be the asshole that gives a " I don't have a weakness" answer because it's bullshit and they know it.

Autism

Anal.

Well, my greatest weakness, not as a person but as a wannabe wageslave is that I have been unemployed almost 3 years

top fucking kek
criminally underrated

I was asked this about a year ago. I basically told him I have have too much confidence in myself to identify a weakness. Once you start acknowledging your weakness you're setting yourself up for failure.

He chuckled and said everyone has a weakness and went on, clearly didn't like the answer. What am I suppose to say?

The indicator they're trying to get out of this is twofold. They're trying to see if you evaluate yourself accurately and how you overcome struggles.

The best way to answer questions like this is to talk about a difficulty you overcame, and how that reflects on you.

This is school leaver tier.

Never say you're too much of a hard worker, all you do is come across as a patronising and self-aggrandising cock mongler who thinks he just aced the question by superficially trying to turn the question on its head.

The real way to turn a negative question like this into a positive answer is to immediately talk about things that you feel you want to improve upon and how you think that working with the company might provide you with the opportunities to achieve those ambitions. You might also have a few stock questions to ask them in return, like what their training policies are.

Nope, these are wrong as well, because right after being asked what your greatest weakness is, you'll be asked to describe a challenge you encountered and how you overcame it, and will end up referring to a weaker example.

While the hell do interviewers ask these meme tier questions?

Because HR exists solely to employ useless women who will do useless things.

Self doubt, depression, apathetic, lazy, hate fucking reading. All of those together are really making life hard atm. How bout u op?

Scratch that. Im a raging alcoholic and cant quit. Thats for sure it

I have depression/anxiety bad. Almost killed myself this year when my best friends left us...

The amout of jackass projects i start and never finish make me think i actually have add. School sucked dicks and i hate sitting still even though im lazy af. Gotta have a screen in front of me or be working on a project. I got a new car and a leather sewing machine yesterday.

>that face when i have only been outworked by 2 people in my life until i got this job, realized hard work bever got me anywhere, started studying personal finance and became the lasiest fuck of ever.

Feels goodman.

>I get distracted by my japanese animes too often

>none of your fking business

>What's your greatest weakness

Blondes/Brunettes/redheads/MILFs/etc. (Whatever applies to the interviewer, especially if it's a guy :^))

I care too much about a business whose overall performance will never affect me directly.

money
i would even work for it

I love to see a fake nigga go broke.

kek

no one reads the post after the picture post : (

I always pick something that I can say I worked to improve. The key to answering this question is to pivot off of it because it is a shitty question and they should go fuck themselves for asking.

My ass burgers make me despise office politics. The benefit to that is I work from clock in to clock out, so my production is on par with long-term employees when I'm learning the ropes. My 5 references will testify to that if you ever decide to contact them.

I can get stressed out at times with projects, but use that stress as a motivating tool to complete the project to meet or exceed expectations.

>"Bullets."

I tend to be a people pleaser

you're hired

I feel sad and tired a lot.

"I'm a slight pessimist: My mind usually goes to 'what is the worst thing that could happen' in a scenario."

what's good is that I'm a design engineer, so knowing what could go wrong (operator error, design error, not using an upgrade due to difficulty) can save lots of monies. Usually a lot of design boils down to "it can be the best system in the world, but if it's too much of a pain in the ass for the guy using it, he's going to avoid using it".

>Strength and weakness
Literal Autism

my answer to this question is so fucking gay but it worked

god damn thinking about my answer makes me cringe so hard

killing people who don't hire me and tease me with retarded questions

"I'm lazy."

It works for me because the response has almost always been "your references disagree."

I have a nonstop desire to be dead.

I tend to get gassy after lunch

Alcoholism

you gotta tell us now

>"I am too sarcastic"
>"I like to work on the weekends"
>"I work too hard"
>"I am too set on getting projects done I never give time to myself"
>"I care too much"
>"I say I am too much of a team player"
>"I like to strangle cats"
>"I often get called the office clown, but I that does make a raise in morale"
>"I am too much of a perfectionist"
>"I get too attached too my work"
>"Work is my main priority in life, I often get called a workaholic"

All of them are solid with most people in some ways.

Good question

Underrated

I have a degree in applied math, I told the manager that my greatest weakness is my math degree because a decent amount of people assume I'm just a numbers guy, but I'd rather it speak to my problem solving ability

Damn that sounds gay as fuck, but she seemed really interested, and I landed the position so who knows if it helped or not

>"HR guys"

Hmm... That's a really tough one. It's hard to really think of any. I guess I could say that sometimes I spiral into a deep depression fuelled by hard drugs and alcohol where I go on physically abusive rants where I harass strangers and when I'm coming down I usually make inappropriate phone calls to coworkers and clients and tell them all of my darkest secrets, if I don't end up in a rehab clinic I usually end up waking up on the side of the road with a sore asshole. I also have a can-do attitude that might come across as too positive for some people.

My gwaitest weakness?

Oh right.. so wha I ha to say.. Ryu know what im sayin Im nasty! Uh Yo! Im crhool!

answering retarded questions

"Kryptonite"

I only thought of that now, but I would totally use it if I had thought of it when I was a wagecuck.

Real answer, if I was being honest?

'If there is any female I am in contact with for even 10 minutes a day, I will eventually obsess over her. If she is even a 6.5/10, and I have to spend 8 hours or more around her, I will put her on a pedestal and either - declare my everlasting love for her, or awkwardly try and grope her or 'groom' her - treating her like a part-time girlfriend, regardless of her relationship status.
I will also fluctuate between being overtly sexual or almost asexual, depending on the girl's perceived sexual energy. If a girl actually reciprocates my feelings, I feel great about it for about 3 months, before realizing my self-imposed nightmare of work politics with my girlfriend in the mix, and feel suffocated. I then resort to Machiavellian tactics to remove said girl from her job or department entirely...like her on the right? In that top? In those glasses? In about 3 months, she will think I'm either an alpha sex god, or an awkward beta pervert, depending how things go. any questions?'

Tl;dr - I'm better off in a job with zero women, because I'm a pervert who fluctuates between narcissistic behaviour to conceal my insecurity, and obsessive romanticism. If you are female and responsive, I'm a charmer. If you are not, I'm a fucking psychopath and you will hate me. I'll make sure of that, because in my fucked-up head, it gives me closure.

>"Sometimes I'm stupid enough to apply for jobs at shitty companies where they ask retarded interview questions that anyone could just bullshit the answer to so they might as well not even ask those questions"

>"I don't fucking know just hire me you cunts."

fucking kek, last sentence was the cherry on top

lol

9/10

My honesty. That's a fucking stupid question.

HR exists to discriminate against introverts.

Hard work is "firm handshake" tier advice. Hard work never got anyone anywhere except the janitor closet or a hospital. Smart work is where it's at. Wageslaving should be something you only do if you have no other options.

damn
that's literally me except I just treat unresponsive girls like shit until they usually either confront me about it or we just stop talking. I do this to new girls only and it only lasts a couple of months to 1 year tops.

btw no one thinks you're a charmer, thirst is the most obvious thing to a girl but most just play along

Wanting to see the girl on the right in heels.

Also my uncontrollable foot fetish

I lead too many dogs of the corpse-emperor to the slaughter.

HR exists mainly so that companies can employ useless women and give them 0 responsibility (90% of the time) in order to keep decent gender employment ratios and govt. gibs.
Useless women with no technical skills or work ethic happen to despise introverts, men who don't lift, or drives a car less expensive than hers.

>"I have a wide range of sexual fetish's which, if they ever came to light, would ruin your companies reputation in the eyes of the public."
Really though, if you want the job
>"I can never come into work on Saturdays"

my greatest weakness is no having weaknesses at all

Bullets

Sometimes I get too involved at work and need to take a step back to let new ideas flow through.

I'm dead inside

how positive is "I expected something more sophisticated from this job, why don't you try again"

>I fall in love easily

"I'm a perfectionist"

Seriously tho. I'm a borderline alcoholic. I work my arse off as software developer for great wage but once I get home, cleaned myself, sorted family shit, I drink myself to oblivion, bed, wake up, get up for work and repeat.

I don't think they'd like to hear that though, so I say something retarded like 'I tend to get tunnel visioned on long projects when working alone. I make sure I take the time to get the opinions of more experienced colleagues when that happens'.

They want to hear a negative turned into a positive and I find that one works.