Turn key to start car

my transit connect does the same
fuck ford!

> Want to put Key in steering column
> Can't in either car I regularly drive, because no keyhole in steering column (2006 Saab goes in center console, 2016 Volvo XC90 has a button)
Such is life for the Swedish car enthusiast.

>pressure wash engine
>misfires until the engine bay is absolutely dessicated three days later

>put my laptop on my passenger seat
>beeps and flashes "passanger seat belt" until i put the passenger seat belt on

>having to use a key to open or start your car

>having to use the steering wheel to get somewhere
>having to chew to not die of hunger
>having to have another person present to cum

plebs

>having to cum, not just having the sensation of cumming entirely within your mind

I have to admit defeat!

>drive on highway
>pull emergency brake
>car violently goes off road
>emergency vehicles appears after a while

>turn key
>Manhattan bomb goes off

>Get in car.
>Everything is out of place cause dad moved where its parked the night before.
>Steering wheel locked up
>Cant start car
>Have to get it unstuck to start
How did he do this.

>push button to start car
>WELCOME TO VOLT™ DOODOODAAA DOODOODAAA Doodoodaaa~

>he enjoyed Honda Civic with a custom race built

>turn on interior lights
>moonroof opens.
gotta love older vw's.

>turn engine on
>vtec kicks in

>have a car that is new enough to have modern features
>still not new enough though to have push button start

:( I wanna be cool

>turn key to start truck
>everything dies + air horn screams

starter button is relocated under dash

>turn key to start
>lock actuators keep locking and unlocking

>turn off car
>spin wheel until it binds
>remove key
>relax grip on wheel until steering lock engages
i did this to my brother for a while and he thought his car was broken... just gotta give the wheel some slack

>diving stick for the first time in years
>stuck in uphill traffic
>woman in minivan insists on being half an inch behind my car

>pressing switch to raise all windows
>driver window stops halfway

>boot

>learning stick for the first time
>heavy NYC traffic
>approach hill
>"Oh god no red please"
>red
>but_hole_puckers.jpeg
>"okay I'm good as long as no car get behind me
>BMW i8 approaches
>ohjesuschrist.jpeg
>it's about to turn green
>I can feel my rectum imploding
>start to sweat
>it's okay lemme put it in first
>get green, stall out
>FUCKMYSOUL.png
>car starts to roll back
>turn car on, rev to 6rpm, dump clutch
>pull over and throw up
Wew

>press button to start car
>yearn for the tactile sensation of turning a key to start an engine

I went from a 2000 honda accord to a 2016 mazda3, and I love my mazda but there are some weird things I miss on my honda.

>working in newly bought shitbox
>turn key
>fuse 2 visibly blows instantly

I know this exact feel

Also:
>second time ever driving stick by myself
>go to park
>remember that I have to put it in gear before exiting
>with engine still on, dump clutch to "turn it off"
>horrible jerk forwards as car stops against parking brake
>i'msosorry.png
Never made that mistake again, thank god. I felt like a total retard

Still learning stick with my manual Echo, it's not a big town, but I still have that experience.

>turn key
>SCREEEEE-vrrrrrrrrrrr

this is when you do a burnout and shoot rubber and rocks all over her nice bumper

You think that's bad?

>couple days after getting first stick shift
>leaving work at 9pm
>tired as fuck, long day
>get in car
>select reverse
>slowly bring clutch up
>stall
>wat
>repeat
>stall
>getting frustrated
>mash gas to 2k rpm
>clutch out
>jump back like 10 feet
>wheels screaming
>stall
>"WHAT THE FUCK!?"
>coworker drives up and asks if I need help
>tell him "nah I'm good, thanks" and he drives off
>slam my hand down in anger at my helplessness
>hits the parking brake
>which is in the up and engaged position
>mfw

>brake engaged on uphill
>light turns yellow
>put it in first
>keep brake down
>release the clutch half way until it bites properly
>release the brake fully
>the car is now stationary on the hill, being held there by the power of the engine
>move foot to gas pedal, rev up to at least 2000 rpm unless you have a shit ton of low end torque (diesel tier)
>release the clutch gradually

The whole process takes me under 1 second. It's not that difficult.

if you can multitask you can hold the car in place with the handbrake so you can get full clutch/gas control

I hate doing that. It's just easier to play the foot pedal game.

if you have a foot operated parking brake this does not work.

>engage brake pedal
>pedal becomes limp, floored effortlessly

>have to get into the trunk
>press unlock button
>driver door unlocks
>press unlock button
>passenger door unlocks
>press unlock button
>backseat doors unlock
>press unlock button
>trunk unlocks

>Road gets ripped up Friday morning
>Drice down it, freshly paved Monday morning
>Back woods straight with no houses on it
>Posted limit of 50

Gonna scream down it at triple digits tonight niggaaaa.

All freshly laid and smooth, so fresh your tires will paint the pavement of the next road a little blacker for a while.

Ive been kicking it and it fixes its self after that.
Im glad i got that checked out.
>Couldn't find the problem myself.

That was 5 weeks ago, I can drive stick just as good as used Thai hooker can suck dick. I know my bite point really well and only play with rolling back and forth to fuck with people behind me

>tfw when you fell for the Veeky Forums manual meme
>mfw it's helping me get over a break up and my alcoholism and my depression
>thanks based Veeky Forums

>turn key
>car alarm goes off.

>used to find driving boring except when going WOT
>got my own car
>manual
>actually look forward to driving to work
>now when I can't sleep at night I'll grab my keys and just go driving in my pajamas

>start the old truck
>have to press the gas pedal to start it
>neighbors wake up when it starts.
I know they enjoy it,but they sure don't act like it.

>press button for hazard lights
>headlights shut off
german """engineering""" at its finest

Know this feel so hard. Love you Veeky Forumstists :)

Shit, some of my best memories are going driving my manual at midnight with this girl i knew. We never said much, just flew down the dark back highways listening to classing rock.

>insert key to driver side door; unlock
>door stays locked, window falls
>go to remove key; it's stuck
>press unlock button like I should have in first place
>trunk opens, alarm goes off

>roll down window
>cracking noise

>roll window up
>window falls off the door

>Close driver side door
>passenger side door opens

>insert key fob
>push to start
>nothing
>remove key fob
>insert again
>push to start
>everything's fine
Ok.

> insert key
> turn to unlock steering lock
> turn further to activate ignition
> pull choke lever
> pull in clutch lever
> open throttle slightly
> push starter
> VREM VREM

>Turn key
>Ignition on, everything's normal
>Car starts
>Radio turns on, sunshine roof opens, bootlid opens, Hazards come on

>have fucked up steering column
>start car
>key falls out into the floor when I'm not paying attention
>get home
>reach for keys
>mfw keys are not in the floor anymore

>Engine swapped
>New K frame
>interior almost fully stripped still
>Just started it up to bleed coolant yesterday and found in the process that my obd2 port doesn't work
>Don't know what's wrong with it. I bet it will be a pain.
>Decide everything is fine even though the check engine light is on
>take it for the first drive since the swap and it started to rain
>Turn wipers on
>They go way too far and go past the edge of the window and get stuck
>Kek to myself and assist them back down
>Drive back home and lay a mean peal on the driveway

$350 shitbox props. Starting to wonder if I should put an interior back in or just make it a race car.

You don't have to lock the center console you tard. Just be glad you even have the option.

>turn steering wheel
>a/c stops working
>straighten out
>get a short blast of cold out
>turn on indicator
>radio gets quiet
>turn indicator off
>radio gets louder than it was before for a second
>turn on brights
>instrument panels gets brighter too

kek dude i do this a lot except the drums in the back of my car are absolutely shot so sometimes i just drive for a while with the parking brake on

>indicate right
>handbrake up indicator starts beeping

So long, renault!

what the fuck is the purpose of this?

The only positives I can see is that there's no bit to break on the keyfob aswell as maybe the ignition lock not wearing out? Hell if I know.

>push A/C auto control button
>lights turn on
>push it again
>windshield heater comes on
>push off button
>nothing happens

Don't you have a brake warning light?

>push windows lever forward
>windows goes down

>push windows lever back
>windows goes up

works only if RWD

>gear lever moved forward, three forward gears

>gear lever moved back, only ONE backward gear (and two forward gears)

But, that's correct

>sitting in traffic
>move leg suddenly because driving automatic truck and it itches
>bump steering column
>truck turns off
Whoops

Or my favorite
>redlining your 1-3 shifts and then grinding fourth.

>almost get run off road in my baby
>emergency cigarette in the car that I never smoke in
>can't pull over because two lane
>taking turn
>ash flies into my eye

Hellodarknessmyoldfriend.webm

>press horn
>sounds like a toy for 2 year olds

>press horn
>right headlight winks off

>be not a peasant
>push button to start car

>press horn
>airbag goes off

>be a peasant
>push button to start car

> Manual steering
> Manual brakes
> REV to 2500RPM
> Power steering
> Power brakes
I have a brand new belt guys, why does it do this?

Vacuum leak in your brake booster and your steering pump is shot?

No its a civic em2 2001 ex.
Break light is only on for the parking brake.

>Have to untie laces to open boot

>dad teaching me how to drive stick

>takes me to hill dead-ending into a fence

>parks car at bottom of hill inches away from fence

>tells me to reverse up hill

What do ya think happened lads

>out for a hoon
>cigarette in my mouth
>almost done with it
>rear suddenly loses traction
>swallow still lit cig

That ER visit was fun.

a mad skid?

You reversed perfectly

>increase volume of super eurobeat
>car goes faster

>clutch in to shift from 4th to 5th
>engine dies

>put car in neutral
>turn key
>"please engage clutch pedal"
>not even in gear but okay
>try again
>"please press brake pedal"
>parking brake still engaged but okay
>try again
>turns on
>put in first
>try to disengage electronic parking brake
>BEEP BEEP
>"please put on your seatbelt"

Fuck it, I'll just take the bus.