Masturbating with Automotive Fluids

Sometimes in the stock room I have extra time on my hands. Fresh motor oil seems to work best, but I don't know if synthetic or conventional is safer in terms of skin exposure. I'm un-circumsized if that helps. Any suggestions?

what the fuck

Just wear a condom or use a glove as a condom lol

Never change Veeky Forums

I accidentally touched my eye with greasy hands after messing around with a car and it hurt for twenty minutes straight while I washed them out in a sink.

Used motor oil has less additives and detergents, would be better to use that.

Anti freeze will probably be the best

>Used motor oil
But doesn't that have more acids and metals?

I got some of that pummice lotion oil remover onto my lips and it was numb for multiple hours afterwards.

Also, my skin seems to instantly warm whenever brake fluid touches it. I don't know if there is actually some kind of reaction taking place or if its just the feeling but it feels p nice

Brake fluid makes me nervous because it's so destructive to paint.

uncircumcised and you need lubricant? dude just use a silicone based lubricant, shit never dries out on its own and you can still wash it off after. pic related

Even with CLEAN oil I'm a little adverse to getting that shit onto exposed skin.

So run your car on Astroglide.

We need more threads like this in Veeky Forums. This will make Veeky Forums great again.

I like to huff seafoam and then cum into my car's intake manifold

>cheesedicks
Lmao

Nice. We've got a case in back for lubricating windows and doors.

I read somewhere that getting brake fluid on your skin can damage your liver

STOP STOP STOP used motor oil and potentially other used fluids like brake or atf are carcinogenic.

Holy fuck what the shit

When I was a lube tech I would get a stiffy every time I was in the pit and hot oil got splashed into my work pants. My pubes were like an overgrown jungle so it didn't really burn. It felt nice actually.

Where do you hide the open containers?

I'm not talking about a can of silicone spray for window run channels, I'm talking about "personal lubricant" that's silicone based, that pic was related you know.

Have fun with dick cancer miataboi

>mfw op gets testicular cancer from jacking off with used motor oil.

are you the guy who asked why his penis always smells like engine oil?

Coolant would probably be safest.
Or synthetic brake-lube.
Washer fluid a far third.

Everything else=cancer or dick rot

Just make sure you use a thin weight, i tried using 5w-30, it started overheating so much that i threw a rod and ruined my ball bearings

Am i on /d/ again.
Have you by chance used Italian olive oil as lube before.
Also don't stick it in the engine op. That ain't gonna feel too good.

Mods? Hello?

>mods

Where do you think you are?

This is a quality thread

This thread is pic related.

All though thanks for answering questions I didn't know I needed answered.

9/10

lol'd

How is 5W-30 not a thin weight? At body temperature, it won't exceed it's 5W base viscosity.

Shit, so I'm not the only one who does this?

DOT4 fluid is probably the best out of all I've tested. It's even better if you warm it up a little. Vaginas can't compare.

Gotta use 0w20 for dem mpgs

>uncircumcised
>lube
but why?

>White smoke intensifies

I've been in the cesspool of /pol/ since last June, and I come back today, and I'm not disappointed.

>/pol/
>cesspool
You're either a nigger, or a jew or a leftist, aren't you?

No lol, 25 y/o white male trump supporter famalam.

CTR has made is a cesspool

>0w20
That's only available as a synthetic. Is it as safe on my skin as conventional oil?

...

I'm a chronic masturbator, not a homosexual.

Used oil or nothing, you wuss.

...

bump

>he doesn't use ArmorAll
Git gud

Just dont switch from conventional to synthetic and vice versa. Dont want those detergents releasing any buildup.

use brake cleanner it's best.

What about high mileage oils? They contain a seal swelling agent. Will that have an effect on my erection quality or girth? Will it tighten-up my foreskin?

OP you retard. You use synth if un-circumsized and reg for superior dick layout

when will this thread die??
it's been on the front page for like 4 days.

Hopefully it gets stickied

>muh superior circumcised dick
found the jew

If you can get it, try Morgoil. It's used in rolling mills, and when it's warm it's a pleasure to rub it over your body. Such a nice, comfy feel

Silicone lubricant is god tier. I use it over generic grease on most things. The only downside is how expensive it is

That's nice, but they destroy toys over time so I have to stick to water-based.

Bad dragon's cumlube is god-tier anyway.

Good thread.

Ok Donald Trump

keep this thread alive dammit!

Have you ever read that part of the bottle that says "has been shown to cause cancer in labratory animals"? That's you. That's your dick now.

If you're uncut, why do you need lube at all?