/ss13g/ - spessmen on a spess station

I'd be really, really happy if Celt finally leaved.

Alright. What was the deal with the biohazard.

>2 hours of being a borg for a milf that doesn't do anything the whole shift

BEST WAIFU

It was made MALF later, I believe that it was extended before like 2 hours.

I was the warden.
I got the fuzzy tingling in my balls that it was malf when the only prisoners coming in were just people being dicks to eachother, that's when I started asking you if you were a nice borgo that wouldn't hurt nobody.

nah dude, I spawned with the malf law

Do we get to eat him yet for failing us.

Alright, let me understand the drama with Celt.
He's a guy that works for free on the code and people want him to go, right? Why?

It was malf the whole round

because he's irish

So you're all really memeing and there's no real hate towards him?
meh-tier meme, if I do say so myself

he said he can do like 100 bug fixes in a week and joked that he would step down from being an admit if he couldn't; yesterday he opened pr bug fixes done by someone else and now people are joking that he should step down because he didn't do them himself. The drama is only real in your head

because he added the STUPID FUCKING MICROWAVE TO MEDBAY

not quite memeing. i want him gone so cluster can take his rightful throne as god emperor of the code

>yesterday he opened pr bug fixes done by someone else
lacking some context here, this makes it sound like he stole the fixes or something
someone else gave the fixes to him and let him use his name as a joke

humans best waifus, xeno-fuckers get out

>hiding shit
>as a crab

I'm really getting tired of your furshit.
I'm really tired of your degeneracy.

tfw no dominant admin gf to add a third OOC permaban to your rapsheet, further denying your desperate mind from communicating to the other autists out of character

There's no fur on a xeno!!

THE AI JUST BANE MEME'D BAN HE

If I spaced that greyshit, would it hurt?

How do I get eggs out of a chicken?

*BWOINK*

punch them out

Cargonia would be happy to take that off your hands.

Feed it wheat

So I feed it, then kill it?

DO not kill the chicken

since i like the image i'll stop lieing. don't kill it, just feed it wheat. you can build an incubator with some shit and hatch the egg for more chikuns and therefore more eggs and therefore more chikuns and so on

DO kill the chicken

Feed it wheat then kill it, yes.

>page 10

dead thread dead serb

Anyone know what rate normal reagents metabolize at? Is it 0.1u per tick, or more?

When reading Chemistry-Reagents, keep these in mind:
REAGENTS_METABOLISM = 0.2
REM = REAGENTS_EFFECT_MULTIPLIER = REAGENTS_METABOLISM / 0.4 = 0.2 / 0.4 = 0.5
So derma, for instance, metabolises at 0.2 and heals for 3 * REM = 3 * 0.5 = 1.5

Did you know that if you have a borer inside of you, you can survive with no oxygen, no pressure and no blood inside of you in cold space without a hardsuit? Thanks friend, that was hilarious.

>randomname assistant with the first name Kingston
>make meds for chemistry (albeit only keloderm/antitox/bicard because i was busy making essential chems like foam surfuctant and ran out of power), medical man chlorals me and drags me out
>go back and try to make more meds, medical man chlorals+cages me and tells nobody to open it, so i open it and leave
>master plan to get the HoP drunk on amasec and then steal his ID
>i do so, get away, give my ID all access, and get a taser before giving the ID back and getting away scot-free
>tase+cage the medical man, he did the same to me earlier and i want to give him his own little wild ride
>drag him around and soon the entire security force and medbay is after me
>run away, tase the detective, lead everyone to the mortuary
>get caught before i can force medical man to "confess" by screaming into his face
>suddenly medbay explodes and depressurizes half the station, ZAS hell
>the only, ONLY room not affected on the left side of the station was the mortuary
>tfw i lead many people to the only room where they could survive
>tfw i kept half of medbay's staff alive when medbay itself was targeted
>tfw i was the savior of the station
>tfw i was spaced for my noble deed
FREE
KINGSTON

...

I am impressed by Heroinehero007's ability to quickly assemble bombs from my materials without any assistance. I dipped out to help make telecryo for just a few minutes.

Well the science department was pretty damn amazing in this round. No shitters and everybody being competent except that we didnt space the fucking clone with the teleporter the moment he enterd. Like seriousily, if any fucker (especially the fucking clown) snoops around inside science then you allready know that they are only there to steal our shit and use it to be shit.

>webuild.png

...

how new are you?

I was in that malf round earlier. Cargo's fucking terminal glitched out and stopped working for no reason leaving me with literally nothing to do but sit on my rainbow coloured ass. The only solution I could find was getting incredibly drunk and spacing myself. Also anyone know how to commmit an efficent suicide? Rather than just hitting yourself in the head untill you go into crit and bleed/take to much crit damage.

Godspeed Detective, you even made it out of the server before all that Hyperzine exploded your heart.

If it glitches out unscrew it, and unwrench it, and then re-wrench it and rescrew it.

Use a duck to gib yourself with the suicide command

Chaplain and Cargo can space themselves pretty easily. I've done it accidentally as both.

Pretty sure there's a verb for Suiciding. Like Suicide. See folks do it fairly often. Hey, free meat for burgers.

litterally type suicide

Also how do I kill myself.

How do i upvote?
I warned the RD and Security the moment the clown came and had my stun batton and wirecuffs ready to teleport him to another demension but RD told me to just be kind to him and let security handle it or something.
To mutch kind is bad senpai.

>Like seriousily, if any fucker (especially the fucking clown)
Honk

When I tazed and cuffed the clown, I dragged him to security and told him to be a good boy, which he was for a good part of the round. I didn't really wanna deal with an execution or perma for just a clown breaking in, that's like the Clown's job.

Its your job to perma and execute people

>that's like the Clown's job.
The clowns job is to make people laugh.

Something most clowns fail at.

You couldn't have known the clown was evil. He could have been a friendly clown.

Who here would go to training sessions on the test serb if they were held regularly on Saturdays?

> the clowns job is to make people laugh
again, how new are you?

He's not wrong. Sorry that what you read on r/ss13 is wrong.

Depends on what the topics are.

>blowing up half of meta club
>not funny
Also he was a traitor ling. So technically his job was to succ and steal shit/kill people.
Which makes me wonder why he was pretending to be a paramedic

RD here, I gave the clown and mime near all access becuase I was feeling nice that round. Clown said he would be a pal so I took it as that he would avoid fucking up things for science.
As for toxins and his bombs, I know mitchell owen enough to tell when hes antag and if the test bomb looks nice I don't really care to stop him because its a good bomb and I want to see how much it fucks things up. Its like seeing an antag setting up a gimmick, you don't stop them because you want to see how far it goes. He wouldn't really bomb sci anyway becuase that his base of operations

>Why would a ling want to be a paramedic
>The job that has the most reason to find you when you're alone, and knows WHEN you're alone

Engineering, Atmos, and Medbay currently.
Hopefully AI/Silicons, Heads, and Antags eventually.

Others may pop up if the need arises.

Clowns deserve RESPECT. I remember a time when clowns had the protection of a deity, and when they got mistreated, there was hell to pay. What happened to this?

I'd go for a toxins one.

that book where a clown fucked the honkmother was true and that sin ruined all clowns

Clowns got shittier. Plain and simple.

It's the other way around.
A good clown earns respect with robustitude and elite pranks. A shitty clown does not earn respect. Respect is what protects a clown from dying, ergo shitty clowns have very little protection.

>I was feeling nice that round.
Everyfucking body was nice and kind during the round, thats why it was so comfy

So who stole the IAA's fax after all?

We ended up putting the Chaplain in Perma because he was the most obvious suspect, but I'm not sure we recovered him after the kaboom

I'd be up for teaching nerds how2toxins gud.

Last 2 times I taught someone the sekrits to bombs I was ling and promptly killed them and assumed their identities.

>l-ledditor!
you dont want to fuck with the clown a lot because there's a small chance that he's going to robust you to suicide
plus he's probably the only one wanting to reach the clown's roid, because the miners are A: unrobust or B: fucking bored
and you dont use cable cuffs, you print some real handcuffs from the hacked lathe

Like a real man!

>you dont want to fuck with the clown a lot because there's a small chance that he's going to robust you to suicide
From my experiences they're more likely to whinge to the admins when they get got for shittery.

Thanks. I'm glad you walked away. Pretending ignorance and trying to talk you into making them for me was too tough.

>having a stun baton as a science guy
the shitter in this situation isnt the clown senpai

>RD
>doesn't stop his underlings from bombing
>compares dudeTTVlmao to an actual gimmick
What the fuck is WRONG with you

Thanks. Let me know if you can next round.

The RD was Ricky

Heya, if anyone's interesting we're running a 24/7 instance of FTL13 over at byond://jinteki.industries:5513

It's a more cooperative sort've game where it's less about surviving your fellow crew members and more surviving environmental hazards and enemy ships to complete missions.

It's been fun so far.

sounds interesting

Any major divergences from standard SS13 I should be aware of?

Take some video and post it on Youtube.
The concept sounds interesting, but I can't be arsed to bother connecting.

The gameplay is mostly similar. There are new, specialized roles on the bridge involved ship command, weapons systems, and munitions handling. There's also new stuff in engineering like the FTL drive and Shield Generator. Otherwise it's Veeky Forumsstation.

You may want to read this:

ftl13.com/wiki/index.php?title=Guide_to_FTL13

Link to your Github? There might be some features people would like ported to our server.

github.com/FTL13/FTL13