Your car is your human gf now

Condition and looks = her look
Trim+equipment = her wealth
Age = Mileage in miles divided by 4 digit manufacture year

How fucked are you?

Brand new 2016 Golf, fully loaded... I guess I'm dating a hot, middle class, 7 year old.

>ready to die
>has a bit of money
>113 years old

sounds like I did good for myself

Pretty good looks, middle class and 95 years old. Hot old broad runnin strong.

>looks fine as fuck
>lower class, probably white trash
>21 years old

Could have been worse i suppose

2013 polo with 48k miles and is as loaded as a polo can get
spotless inside out
idk i might like this

Looks like I'm married to a gorgeous, wealthy 7 year old. Call me Muhammed.

Pretty, aside from the minor scarring, but that can be fixed with a little reconstructive surgery at a bodyshop.
Middle-class-ish due to medium trim level.
61k miles/2011=30.3, so about my age.

Hot,
top shape(passed the annual check with compliments from the inspecting engineer)
Rich,
has more or less every option, that can be had from the factory
70, ouch(2004 with 140K)

Mercedes-Benz C220CDI 2004

>tfw no gf

At least you have a license to have a gf.

At least that, right? RIGHT?

2006 miata in good condition.

GT trim with keyless options

23.1 years old

we livin the dream bois

...

American, 43 years old, small in a cute way, no ass

Well, I have more than one mistress. Let's see.

Mercedes
-as she left factory. So, perfect.
-very poor
-93 years.
so eighter proper and prim old lady or elegant elf girl. Has a younger sister.

NC a fatty, NB smug minisnek
Miata-kouhai
- pretty much perfect, except for rubbish wheels.
-middle class.
-30
I think I'm good.

>9/10 as she has some rock chips, dat ass though
>? Was 38k new but top of the line sans vert so upper middle class hoon toy
>40
I win.

What's it run? 11s?

Pic related is not mine. Mine is a pulley/bolt on car and runs 11.80s. Pic is probably a low 10 high 9 second car minimum based on the rear end setup.

Car 1
12 years old and Japanese
likes to go in the woods
can sleep inside
modest income

Car 2
33 years old and German
Good lines but needs some work
Hard to keep happy
Was filthy rich when born but spent 95% of it

Car 3
62 years old and American
Body recently redone
Extremely loud
Comfortable living and makes more and more each year

Guess I'd have to pick the German if my cars all turned into women

>Showroom quality looks. Most think its brand new.
>````Premium'''' trim which is base model in GT-R world but comes with mostly the same equipment in the higher trims
>8 years old
So a pure loli....

>no car
>no gf
Sounds about right

>62 years old hag
>Extremely loud
don't know why but for some reason this amused me greatly

>poor as fuck, 30 year old that is ready to die tomorrow

Great I got a heroine addict gf

>implying

>""New""
>$50k
>2.8 years

why.

>13 years old
>a little bit beaten up in a few places
>undercarriage has a small bit of rust
>left outside at night
>can fit 20 arabs and their kalashnikovs in the rear

Used to be beautiful but has let herself go
Good income, top trim level that wasn't M3
189 years old
Wew

Ignore this, I'm a dumb nigger who didn't read the OP all the way

She's a little bit beaten 57 year old, dirt poor but with a good heart

>looks
I guess she's a solid 7

>finances
she's above the poverty line

>age
fucking 70?!?!?!

Huh. I got a qt 7.5/10 17 y/o with daddy's money but no job.

Not bad, but guess. Young for my taste though.

what are you,gay or something?

Car by car:

1966 Imperial
>Rock solid body; nearly as good as when she left the factory, but the vinyl top has been redone by brush-on Rustoleum
>Luxury car with a healthy array of options; financially set
>47 years old.

1978 Excalibur
>Light wear, but still a knockout
>Crazy-expensive when new; billionaire heiress
>35 years old

1979 Lincoln Mark V
>Looks rough and worn, but not bad by any means; a knockout that has been using heavy drugs for a month.
>Options on top of options on a luxury series of a luxury car; trust fund multimillionaire
>23 years old

1981 DeLorean
>Body that has no flaws, rough on the inside; looks great, but has health issues
>A toy for the rich; surplus funds
4 years old... (only has about 8,500 miles)

1984 Pontiac Fiero
>Looks decent; a 7 if I'm being generous.
>Indy Pace Car edition with dozens of options; lottery winner
>27 years old

Too bad I'm going to jail for pedophilia; sounds like I have a kickers harem.

>Pretty good looking and spotless
>Upper-middle class
>3 years old

Well even a pedo wouldn't call her a GF.

2011 (2010 production) qashqai, 2.0dci platinum (best trim you can get on the J10) awd. condition id say 7.5 on a clean sunny day, paint swirls are the only issue outside but its not the prettiest crossover either ; 84,500km (52500 miles).

26 year old, rich af, and 7.5-8?
im doing hella good lmao we guccibois

>cute but beaten to shit and spray painted black
>no equipment, so poor as fuck
>109

>perfect condition and looks
>fully equipped
>130k miles
Who's the hottest old broad in the books?

Adorkable petite asian, middle-high class, 24 year old.
Im quite ok with this.
Too bad I just dropped her at the hospital as she keeps leaking [human equivalent to coolant].

It's actually a bit scary how close that is to my human gf, except she is 25 years old and only part asian, and she doesn't leak. A bit on the dry side actually.

for my other cars:

2016 insignia 1.6cdti elite (office car). condition 10/10 looks 6.5/10 for what it is. delivered last week so 680km. 2.5 months old, that is some fucked shit lmao

2015 525d xDrive: 35,000km, almost polar opposite of loaded. looks 3/10 because mineral white, beige sensatec and the stock 17" wheels, condition 10/10, avg the looks to 6.5.

This thread is autistic as all fuck. Please reconsider what you're doing.

Good from far, far from good
rare wealth
108

doing it for the will

>qashqai

She's chubby tho :3

Scirocco with the r line bodykit.
Those hips

We're the ones who're having some silly fun, you're the one who's projecting hard

A beautiful Italian 39 year old with no money.

I'm ok with this.

So i'm dating a very healthy, homely looking, lower middle class 4.5 year old...

She's drop dead gorgeous although she's lost a bit of her shine. Inside and out.

Fairly wealthy, at least well above average for those her age.

93 years old.

So a hot as fuck 93 year old wealthy Japanese woman. Well shit, hopefully she's one of those Japanese women that cheat age with black magic.

She's probably one of these manga succubus women who have a lifespan of several hundred years

I am more than okay with this.

Manga succubus women just like dick right? They aren't actually succubus outside of their looks? It'd work with my car to because I'm the only one allowed inside her.

9/10 Strong big American with a few blemishes here and there, nothing some makeup cant fix.
middle class wealth since she comes from a law enforcement family and lived the family tradition until retirement. Now she spends her time running the rural backroads.
Umm... 105 years old? But she still runs with the best of them.

>That sexy fat ass

Brand new, Black
Fully Loaded
15

I'm not sure about this game...

> looks
could be better, but fine for that age
>"sporting"
almost top level, just missing the GPS so I guess upper middle class?
>166k km
103147 miles if I'm not mistaken
103147/2004=about 51.5
well could be hot desu

How the fuck did I end up with a wealthy, beautiful, 100 year old?

7/10
Lower middle class
17 years old

Not too bad

2003 tdi golf
I guess i'm dating a middle class 70 year old

>been around the block, but pretty damn good for her age
>fully loaded
>62 years old

7/10
Upper middle class
100 years old.

>all these homeless/poor women
Why do people buy base model cars and then drive them for 400k miles? Better sound and warm seats for 10 years is certainly worth $495 or however much. Or has standard equipment gotten that good since I last bought a car in 2005?

Add this:

Number of previous sexual partners = square of number of previous owners

1966 Imperial
>9

1978 Excalibur
>4

1979 Lincoln
>No Idea; probably 16

1981 DeLorean
>9

1984 Fiero
>4

Not too bad, given the real-world age of my cars.

1 previous owner
it was probably her dad because why would a pure aryan qt want to race mix??

1999 ML 320, basic interior and format, 1999 manufacture year.

I'm fucking a supercentenarian

>22 year old
>bitch face
>6/10 qt
>is really boring person
>likes to go out places
2015 Toyota Corolla everyone

>hot af
>broke af
>14
wish me luck senpai

a bit scratched
pretty well equiped for the time gps clim etc
she 69 tough

>2007 buick lacrosse
>good condition, classy looks
>mid range luxury features
>45 years old

Nice tight body, but she has psoriasis
Firmly middle class
Age: 57
Sounds like I have a cougar. One that sheds, but a cougar nonetheless.

>wealthy
>mustang
Not unless it's a GT350

1985 gmc high Sierra. 70 years old. You do the rest. Shitty pic. Everything on it works and it's got a new paint job. In the shop right now getting it re painted on the bottom half because not enough paint though.

...

69 and full of holes

>sluts.tiff

>3/10, both front fenders have damage that also smashed headlights, which doesn't make them fight correctly. Bad rear brakes so her knees are about to fall apart. New struts so she just got a hip replacement

>lower class, probably a waitress and a single mother

>120 years old

99 Camry

>good condition, alright looks
>not very well equipped, but has a few options
>45K 2003 = 22 years old
I can dig it

>tfw totaled my car while drunk driving

D-did I murder my gf lads?

>worn out, beat up and full of holes
>base model diesel (slow and broke?)
>127 years

Welp

69 year old, well used, slightly wrinkled lower-middle class gal.

>40th Anniversary Edition Mazda RX-8
>great condition
>one of the best versions of the RX-8, limited to 1000 in the US
>92k miles

Hot, wealthy, 45 year-old Asian milf.

Not too terrible.

E93 328i
>damn near mint condition
>cabrio with comfort access, so pretty wealthy
>bout 50

Dope

48 y/o milf all optioned out. Huh, it could be worse.

Merc CLA
>hot as fuck, especially from the back
>middle-class
>14

Hate all you want but it'd be a hot fuck, maybe a bit slow, but still a hottie. I'd fuck her hard tbqh

I found mjet's gf

Fine ass 48 year old Japanese woman strong enough to kill me, upper middle class.

I'm okay with it.

>mfw 2017 fit with 1000 miles on the clock

>brother murdered her today at the age of 77.
She was a good woman. May she rest in peace. ;_;

Volvo 245GLT
> hot as fuck, from a distance
> upper-middle class
> only +200 years old

>Rough around the edges, but overall good looking
>Next step up from base, so lower middle class
>133 years old
Not bad if she hadn't been dead for years
04 Ranger with 267k miles

Attractive middle cllass 16 year old girl

not bad

Ugly, worn, poor but respectable, and 220 years old. Japs amirite?

>2001 Accord EX V6

>has a couple of stretch marks and blemishes, but isn't lumpy and still running strong
>solid middle class, not really exciting, but still stable and reasonable
>70 years old

>mostly okay looking, shows her age but not bad
>wealthy
>70 years old
>asian so she still can pass for 20yo

>2005 honda cbr600rr
>14 y/o girl next door kinda tomboy

I would totally go to jail.

In hindsight buying the car with the sunroof and fake wood trim is great

1992 Honda Integra

>fairly attractive, with only one unsightly mole on her ass
Clean, with no dents. Small rust spot on boot.
>moderately wealthy , but she boasts about it which could be dangerous
Powersteering, electric windows, back window wiper, but no airbags
>107 years old
215k divided by 1992

god FUCKING damn it

>Classic aesthetic; Showing it's age but immaculate interior.
>Babby's first luxury car.
>52.

I feel like my car is a stereotypical 'hot cartoon mom' style mild.

>6/10 Korean girl, desperate to blend in
>Middle class, lives in a tightly packed apartment block in Seoul
>50 y/o (2011, 120k mi)

>16 year old french qt3.14
>always smiling
I'd've hit the jackpot lads

you guys realize when you're driving 16 year old shitboxes, you're car can't be "upper-class" right?

Me too. Low mileage Ferrari.
Point me to Mecca, bro.

Upper middle class 100 year old bogan

>as she keeps leaking [human equivalent to coolant].
It's normal for women to leak some blood every month user. It'll stop in another 25 years or so.