Helping girls with their Veeky Forums stories?

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autistic fag. Would you have offered to help if it was a man that asked you? Hah, I bet you'd inflate all his tires then offer to suck his dick before you drive off into the sunset in your miata.

I wouldn't fill them for him, I'd offer to teach him how to do it though.

Watamote sure is flat

>yes fill my ass with your dick I'm teaching you

lessons in lovin'

is that supposed to be a bad thing?

>looking for parking spot
>see some qt dumb bitch in a C Klass trying to park
>wait 1-2 minutes, 5 minutes later she's still trying
>see her pretty face through the windshield being cluless and shit, smiling like a dumbass
>get out and ask her if she'd like me to park her car, turns out she had a baby seat in the back including a kid, she starts yelling and shit and eventually says she's in a hurry and if i'm in a hurry to park it for her
>get in her car and stop in the middle of the of the fucking road get out and through the key in the bushes
>leave

this is the 2nd time i did this shit and it always feel gratifying as hell

D E V I L I S H
E
V
I
L
I
S
H

Please tell me you really did this

You're such a cunt but goddamn that's pretty funny.

MAD MAN

> 01:00 AM driving home after a concert with GF and another friend
> Take break at highway station for some coffee
> 2 girls standing at the shelf with oils
> puzzled faces they ask the clerk if a certain oil will suit their car but he has no idea
> I walk up to the girls and ask if they need any help
> "yeah our car suddenly made alot of noise and a light came on in the dash, my boyfriend said on the phone maybe it needs oil"
> "what car do you have"
> it's some shitty Kia Econobox
> they have 2 more hours to drive till they are home
> advise them to get some cheap 10W40 (just to get home) and ask if they need help filling it up
> they gratefully accept cause they had no idea how to open the bonnet or what the oil cap was
> fill her up, start car, no noise, no warning lights
> "tell your boyfriend to look at it some time soon"
> "we will!"
> we leave them and head home

Fuck that face still triggers me
I remember that part and i knew from the second i saw that face and heard the music, that something very bad was about to happen

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I only ever played for emi
It felt like cheating to try the other girls

Lilly master race

>arrive at school
>"user!"
>its a girl i barely know
>"i cant put in reverse gear, i cant park the car"
>I go over
>get in
>reverse is somehow hard to put in
>put in first gear
>drive 10cm forward
>put in reverse without problem and park like a pro

I think this was the last time she talked to me

I was drawn toward lily the most when i first played
Only until i met emi though
Wanted to do a playthrough with her but again it didnt feel right

Saw a poofter tip 2 of these into his Saab 9-3.
Pulled up in front of him and said "Hey m8, you've put too much oil in"
>"It'll be fine"
lolk. Ended up down the road with his hazards on. Presumably waiting for a towie or a blowie.

Is your sister a QT? She sounds like a real catch. I also agree with user as there are a lot of people who shouldn't have kids, but you'd make a great parent. Please reproduce.

People just don't realize that helping someone figure it out themselves is 100X more effective than just showing them.

Oh man I got one

>college in MA
>winter time
>getting fucked by snow, its snowing a foot every fucking Wednesday like clockwork
>I routinely go down to my car to shovel it out. Not cause I need to go anywhere just now, but when I do I want to be able to leave
>Not much to do midday anyways
>snow is about 4 feet high just in the areas between cars
>finish clearing my car, see two chicks about 5 spaces up fucking around in a newish black Maxima
>they just keep going backwards and forwards, and stop once and a while to squabble at each other
>go over and ask if they need help
>'yeah, I dont know how to back in my car'
Fukken what
>offer to do it for them, its only 3 feet from in the spot anyways
>put it into Reverse
>moving my head to look over shoulder, but something on the dash catches my eye

LCD screen with a perfectly working back up camera

>Is your sister a QT?
Dude she's my sister, I'm not some Oreimo sis-con faggot. Plus I'm like 80% sure shes [spoiler]gay, or at least 2d-sexual like me our parents divorce really fucked us up[/spoiler]

>tfw Emi's route inadvertently helped me lose 80 lbs

that'.s how I discovered the magic of 2d

>Slutty buddy has once again been trying to live in the big city
>Gets shitbox Neon from buy-here-pay-here on some idiot friend's advice
>Have ridden in it in the past, rattly bushings everywhere but w/e
>The second time I pop the door (while her boyfriend is sleeping in her mom's appartment) because she left her key in it Ijust take it and make myself a copy
>Says it overheats sometimes and sprayed everywhere when one of her big city friends who's "into cars" opened the radiator in the red
>lolookay
>Lets this guy make her payment for her and use it for a month because she's broke
>Gets it back "It's clunking and grinding"
>Huge dent in the front wheel, overfilled transmission, brown coolant
>"Just three more $200 payments and it's mine!"
>Syphon out excess transmission fluid
>Consider going into buy-here-pay-here business
She ultimately got it repossessed I'm sure some other dummy has spent $1000+ by now just for the privilege of driving that shitbox until they can't make their payment either

>I couldn't get air into some girl's "tyre" and I felt embarrassed about it

Correctly done. Only ever perform simple diagnostics for girls you haven't banged. Ask her how it went the next time you see her and be prepared to agree it wasn't entirely her fault.

Probably also okay because other benefits

Remember, Anons girls ask two different kind of guys they don't know for help with their cars: Guys they either want to "pay" with their pussy or guys they think are too pathetic to even expect that. Find out which one you are to her ASAP.

What did he mean by this?

I understand the story, so you must be mentally deficient

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Absolute bullshit you beta nerd.

Would be awesome if you had though

>she was helping her friend (male) do the valve cover gaskets

guess what he probably did her gaskets later if you know what i mean

see
l2read

You got played, you limey fuck.

Get outta here freak, Shizune best girl.

>Don't ever help anyone for free.
FTFY

women that drive a Subarus are sluts.
Its the slut car m8

This

His sister is probably fucking everyone she meets

except this guy

>75% of the reason I started browsing Veeky Forums and working on my car was to impress girls with my powerlevel
>Too beta to approach girls under any circumstances, the one time I had a chance (simple jumpstart) I pretended that I didn't see her and drove away
Please lads I need help

>Anons girls ask two different kind of guys they don't know for help with their cars: Guys they either want to "pay" with their pussy or guys they think are too pathetic to even expect that. Find out which one you are to her ASAP.

There's the third type that is prevalent here. It's the girl that collects "resources" in case she ever needs free help from them. They'll be somewhat flirtatious but that is the most you'll ever get out of them. They only want to have as many contacts as possible in case they have problems needing a free fix.

I got trapped by one of these girls expert at doing that kind of social networking. UGH. I had to finish doing it properly or else I knew she would tell everyone else how I screwed her car up for her. Heck, she's probably going to do that anyways. One of those ladder climbing types. I've learned my lesson and am not so naive that I just help everyone.

There's people one can help that will just turn and stab in the back by saying their help was no good. Of course they don't say it to the person's face. And it's most likely the car or driver's fault that 6 months later something else goes wrong.

I just pretend to know nothing now. Hiding power level is best.

>You got played, you limey fuck.
Yup. You help her. She gives you disdainful look after you are done. She then leaves.

>75% of the reason I started browsing Veeky Forums and working on my car was to impress girls with my powerlevel

That's stupid. They will force you to help them. If you say no, they will character assassinate your reputation with all their friends.

>/osg/ license plate frame
that's your car you autist, keep dreaming.

>have FWB and she's friends with another girl I wanted to fuck
>FWB hits me up says her and her friends car wont start, stuck in a parking lot
>late 90's oldsmobile alero
>seemed like it wasn't getting fuel
>pop hood, open up relays
>change fuel relay with some other more useless relay that was in the bunch that matched
>fired right up
>fucked FWB that night, and her friend not that long after.

Now try for a threesome

barked up that tree, was years ago and never happened. :/ the friend was a one night stand, and the FWB is married and in another state

I pumped gas for an older(wouldn't say old) asian woman who could barely speak english.

Last month a moderately attractive woman came up to me in a very form fitting dress and asked me if she could have some money for gas to get her and her kids across Dumbarton bridge. I didn't believe here so I told her I didn't have any money. She didn't even bring up that it's $5 to cross the bridge from the side we were on.

Other than that, it's mostly just guys trying to sell a headlight defogging and general degreasing spray called formula T1 or something like that. First guy who tried to sell it to me defogged my left headlight but I didn't have any money so I didn't buy it. Second guy gave me the same speech a few years later saying it was a brand new product that hasn't hit shelves yet and he was getting upset when I told him someone already gave me the demo a few years ago and I believe it works because it directly contradicts his statement that the product is brand new. It was at the same gas station too. I don't know why it being brand new was supposed to be such a huge selling point.

Lucky bastard, my sister has never washed her car and it's full of garbage, san jose sharks merchandise, and empty jack in the box cups and coffee cups from our local basic bitch coffee shop

We have those people at the gas station on base all the time. They always come up to me after I've been out in the field or the cargo yard for 12+ hours, without fail. The worst ones are the waterless car soap guys, they'll just start spraying whatever voodoo shit all over without even asking.

From one autist to another

Plus I don't drive a Subie because I don't vape :^)

heh, my neighbor always used to do shit like this with her jeep... I think that was the context she used to get my number

there were a lot of "issues" with her car but here is the one that comes to my mind first
> texts me one day that her jeep wont start
> asking for rides, can I borrow a car, etc
my cars are both stick, fuckno.jpg, go to look at her car asap
I diagnose bad starter
> oh can you help me fix it pleaseeee?
we go to the junkyard and pull one for $25, connectors are different but as long as it's from a jeep 4.0 I'm fine with it
I bolt it in while she is using any excuse she can to make physical contact
>I cut my hand and she cleans it up and puts a band aid on
semiboner.jpg but don't want to get involved
I finish it, works, everyone's happy
>user do you want to come inside so I can show you something?
"ah sorry I gotta run"
go home and smoke weed

>3 waifus in one
source pls

I wish I could tell you lad, I've been hunting myself. If I find it I'll post it in /c/ on the latest tomoko thread

>heres 3 more

>filename
wew

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>doing labor of any kind for a woman for free

Literally what are you guys doing?

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>well yea I filled it up with fresh oil last night
DUDE

no synchros on reverse gear, happens to mine sometimes along with the other gears because bad synchros. Usually I can just shift into other gears a few times then it'll pop in.

>Saw a poofter tip 2 of these into his Saab 9-3.
Aside from way too goddamn much, that car has some serious issues with sludge and it shouldn't have anything besides good synthetic.

Very fun cars though.

I can rev my Honda to 7500 rpm all day while people like this tell me I'm wearing it out. People, dude.

attaboy

>getting fucked by Snow

Serah?

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>be me, 19 and on my way home from work, driving my 95 4x4 ram 3500
>spic loses his ladder on freeway across 3 lanes, freeway comes to a dead stop from 65 to 0 in a hurry
>that saturns not stopping, fuckfuckfuckfuck
>stand on brakes
>KRAPLUNKRUSH
>get out really quick to check on other driver, her airbag didnt go off,
>bloody ass nose, shes crying but gawd dayum those legs
>grab paper towels out of my truck for her nose ask if shes ok, shes shaken up and her nose hurt but ok
>little saturn is fucked, not sure why airbags didnt go off. Shes apologizing over and over.
>"its really ok, it looks like just my bumper, but your cars stuck on my hitch." Lemme get it off....
>drive forward a few feet dragging her car with me then CRRRRAAAACK
>pull off entire front bumper / grill assembly. "S-s-sorry...." spaghetti warning
>she says it's ok its her fault, she tries to start and move it, nothing.
>grab tow strap and drag her saturn from the middle lane to the breakdown lane, chat until cops come, spaghetti remains calm, we seem to hit it off, shes flirty almost.
>cop arrives gets report and the tow truck driver arrives later. Ho-ly shit tow driver is a massive mountain of a scary biker, eye patch and everything shityounot.
>tow driver gets her car on the flatbed and says "ill give you a ride, baby" to her
>she looks at me damn near begging silently, hnnnnng. "Im going to give her one"
>good engaging conversation on the way to her apartment, pull into the parking lot, "heres fine I'm weird about strangers knowing where I live"
>1million better things could've been said to get this girls number or flirt or ANYTHING. Instead "I've already got it on the police report, -creeper pause- and your number."
>WTF did I say that for?
>doorslam and hustle away

Fml.

> Filling up car
> Old lady on the next pump asks for help getting the locking fuel cap back into her car
> It's an older Ford, so I know the problem
> Fix problem
> Go back to filling up my car

Kek

This
Do as says and hide your powerlevel. Honestly best thing to do. Recently learned thr hard way

god this is such autism, you have to be below average IQ to think that way

Never really had an issue helping women, but then again I don't go around offering trying to get poosey.

>In college
>woman's car alarm is going apeshit
>campus security is there
>everyone is just standing there looking at it dumbfounded
>"Do you know about cars?!"
>I just go with "a little bit.."
>Turns out it's the same aftermarket alarm as the one on my car
>oh hey, let's switch batteries on key fobs real quick
>Turns alarm off
>switch batteries back, tell her where she can buy said batteries
>Woman is thanking me profusely
>"Can I give you a ride home?!"
>Politely refuse, I live 1 block away
>"Here have some money!"
>Politely refuse again, it really wasn't a big deal...
>She insists, hands me a $20
>Pizza money, woo

Shit, even now I feel bad, like $20 for switching a fob battery was excessive.