Be 20

>be 20
>don't live the US, education is relatively cheap
>family is very well off, parents are both business owners in the tech market. they make very good money and have great entrepenerual skills.
>they never went to college so expect me to achieve greatness once i obtain my degree
>have been trying uni for the last two years, have switched unis and mayors once
>can do well from the start of the semester but never find the motivation to keep going and always quit mid
>have tried BA and an art major because I'm too dumb for STEM
>the past few months i've been pretending to go to school but in reality i've just been walking around the city and already failed
>i have no idea what to do with my life, thinking about killing myself because i have never given a shit about getting educated at a university
>don't value things as much as i do
>go to a psychologist and psychiatrist for help because i'm an absolute disgrace
>all i do is study and play poker, don't have any real valuable skills

>life has lost all meaning
>i know if i try next semester to go to school i'll quit again because i'm a piece of shit
>want to make bank
>want to do something
>don't know where to start

i guess i just came to Veeky Forums to blog

i also don't proof read shit

>don't live *IN the US

>...and always quit mid *way

>... and already failed *all my classes

>don't value things as much as i *should

kill yourself. cut to the chase. no reason to keep procrastinating.

I think about it every day, man. Maybe I'm just not fit to live.

start bartending/waiting tables

human interaction >>>
making someone's day better by giving em good food >>>

good feelings dude

Whats shitty is telling my parents "hey, remember how you guys wanted me to be successful in life and one day take over your company? well i'm gonna wait tables instead of getting an education"

they'd actually kick me out.

i wish i could just say that it's my life and i am the one who controls it, but they literally give me everything.

>spoilt cunt gon blow his parents' life work
Don't worry OP it's your parents fault not yours, for failing to raise you properly.

got em

> wahh i don't want an education its too hard
The white "master race" ladies and gentlemen!
This is exactly why asians are gonna take over the world.

I don't think it's hard, per se. I'm great at test taking, proyects, assignments, etc. I'm just not a motivated person in any sense of the word and I've never studied anything that gives me any passion.

As a whole, I'm a stupidly depressed person which also doesn't help. I've never failed a class/course out of sheer ignorance, the only times I've failed is because one day I was suicidal and decided that it wasn't worth going if I was eventually going to kill myself.

I'm not making excuses, though. I know how much of a piece of shit I am and every day I become more and more desperate for some form of motivation to live. I've convinced myself that it all comes down to finding what it is I want to do for a living, and then everything will be ok. But how do you even find that out without wasting years of your fucking life?

I agree with the user's sentiment. Kill yourself.

Your mom should have aborted you imo

I wish she would have.

You're fucking pathetic.

You're really so goddamn unmotivated?

>wahh wahh biz wat do i do, am just a lazy piece of shit who wants to be a millionaire

Piss off. The way you're going you won't amount to anything.

I know. I'm not claiming to be on the path of greatness and becoming filthy rich.

You dont deserve your life, so yes, kill yourself, faggot.

I just realized my dynamic IP is changing my ID

I most likely don't. I haven't worked for anything I have.

You're right user. I might kill myself, actually.

Yeah, don't kill yourself. Just do shit you enjoy and live life for yourself rather than for parents
Is on the right idea, get yourself a job and become financially independent rather than mooch off your parents. So what if they don't approve ? Fuck 'em, your life, not theirs.

The world is your oyster nigga, where the fuck does it say that you need a university degree to be successful? Stop your bitch ass self-loathing trip and go achieve greatness.

Make money, fuck beautiful women, go on road trips with friends. Life is a gift, don't waste it.

>I might kill myself, actually.

Don't.

>As a whole, I'm a stupidly depressed person

This is the only problem you need to worry about right now.

I was depressed as fuck a few years ago and hated myself and found nothing interesting. You just need to give yourself a break. Find ways to relax and relive stress. Try yoga or something. Read about Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. Don't punish yourself for being a failure as it will only make things worse.

Once you start to get out of the depression you will find that your interests and motivation will gradually come back. Then you can start to find something you can work at.

It has taken me a like three years to get to where I am now and I'm still not great but I'm at a stage where I can enjoy sport and music and just chill with friends. I found an interest in Trading CryptoCurrencies and indoor climbing. At the moment just having an interest in something is magical for me but I am slowly starting to find some motivation again.

You're 20. You have fucking years and years to sort this out. Talk to your parents about it. If a degree doesn't feel right maybe find an alternate? Ask them for an internship in one of their businesses? If worst comes to worst waiting tables isn't all that bad. Even if you do that for a few years that's still normal for people in their early 20's while they try to get a goal in life.

just give yourself a break. Your parents don't expect as much as you think they do ultimately they probably just want you to be happy.

You made me feel better, user. I'm currently going to a psychiatrist and a seperate psychologist, as I mentioned, and I'm trying to work on my mental problems. I'm just so swingy and it's hard to communicate this with my parents since they've worked all their lives and have had tremendous success in their area. My mom is pushing for me to get a degree in business administration so I take over her place but as much as I care about business, it doesn't motivate me in the slightest to go into that career and that particular job.

I just want to give a shit about something.

>the past few months i've been pretending to go to school but in reality i've just been walking around the city and already failed
I've done this four times, four semesters where I failed most classes, but not always all. Always the fall semester, the feeling of complete failure set in at around early to late November. 6 years no diploma. I only started making sense of what I want to do in life at 25.

>I only started making sense of what I want to do in life at 25.

What is it?

There is one thing you can do OP. And that is, reproduce. Be a miserable shit all you want, but have a few kids and be sure to pass t othem your parents' gains. Have at least 4 of them rascals. Sacrifice yourself for the dynasty.

Until 25 I was ok with mediocrity, I didn't really care about my future and I was being lazy. I just want to have enough to live and play video games in my free time so getting a good paying job did not seem that important.

At 25 I realized the hard way that mediocrity is just not efficient in terms of effort to reward ratio.
So what I want to do now is study hard and get a good paying job :^) This generic adult advice is true, who would've thought.

Hopefully you came to the right place OP.

First off.

Please.

>PLEASE
>DON'T KYS!

>PIC VERY FUCKING RELATED AS I SPENT 25 YEARS OF MY LIFE BRAGGING ABOUT THE LAST TIME I CRIED I WAS 5 AND IF SOME FAGGOT WANTS TO KILL THEM SELF GIVE THEM A LOADED GUN AND THEY WILL OR THEY WON'T.

boy was I fucking wrong...

>Pic is desecrated to fuck with shitty mobile because I don't want good people doxed.

Chick is 100/10 in every way and that hat she is wearing is a memorial hat for my/our best friend who killed himself...

Can hardly even fat thumb through the tears. I have cried every day since March. Almost drank myself to death. Almost ate a shotgun. Been to a shrink. Nothing works but meme tier antidepressant shit like eat right and get /fit. Force yourself to socialize... etc.

>be me
>drinking buddy/10
>happiest bro in my life
>spend 10 hours putting ball joints on his truck
>spend days laughing and having a good time
>bro gets into grilling
>bust our ass fixing up his smoker
>get my own
>drink till 12:30am Monday night
>says will get up an hour early
>"set meat out user.
>"I will teach you to grill"
>tomorrownevercame.wtfever

My best friend in the world took a bullet to the chest so we could have an open casket funeral. Even on his deathbed he was thinking of EVERYONE else besides him...

Few days latter the 3rd musketeer who I'd still gladly eat a bullet for gets a concussion so bad that I have to help him outside or to the bathroom to puke hourly. Fuck near a stroke victim. Had the pleasure of lying to him or telling him our bro "K" died over and over and fucking over. Watched our town fall apart. Discovered ironically as one final fucking LOL DICK MOVE ASSHOLE!

I have told him a story several times over 10 years about a shitty roomate and his dad who was our boss fuck me over. To the point we went trying to find them for a beat down once.

>Mfw it was his dad and brother.
>ARE U FUCKING KIDDING ME U FUCKER!!! HAHA!!

Oh. And blog post and timestamp aside this is the type of shit I get to read daily from several hundred of my closest friends and family. Original screen shot was after 3 minutes.

I spend every second of my life wondering how I can be happy without facing it or trying until I am exhausted and asleep.

The few seconds a day I spend not wondering if I can make it are spent wondering how will my wife will make it if I die. How are the 10 friends I have that are admitted rape and near murder escape victims going to make it. I mean fuck, one of my friends is easily 10/10 rape victim and somehow escaped naked to a house nearby and the fuckers that raped her had written down plans... cucks... one thank God got mop stick raped to death and while the other got beat a few times he is alive and out soon... his parents live a mile from me. How do I allow scum like this to live? "Thow shalt not kill" but I should watch it happen again? If he is a changed man can he ever do enough good to make up for this evil? Is it my place to bury the guy or threaten him or just leave him alone??

Life is shit.

Just take the good when u can and ration it like a goddammed steak in Ethiopia. I don't fucking know...

Good luck. And while 29 days a month I want to die day 30 seems to make it worth it. I hope.

>Mfw I gother diagnosed anxiety and depression and fought "tiks" daily so I got my balls cut without kids. Now what...

Fuck you! You fucking egregious fucking cunt! I would wish bad shit on you but karma will handle that. I just truly hope that you get a better attitude and don't die a hateful miserable fuck. Stop being a fucking cocksuckers. Better your fellow man and in return her bettered by your fellow man u fucking cuck.

You pussy. Do you have any idea the life God has bestowed upon you? You have it so easy but the worst thing you ever experienced is lack of self-esteem? Pathetic.

Life is literally yours to mold and shape. You can either use it to help better other people's lives and feel good doing it or moping like a faggot. Your choice. So many people died so you could live this pathetic life. Think about it for a quick second.

...don't.

I have cheated on my now wife.

I have drank too much almost daily for 15 years.

I have lost great friends and gained lost friends do at a great cost.

Not super religious and is a long story but if u believe in God for me it's all about trials.

For example. I see myself as a useless cuck of bastards retard perportations.

Best friend an hero.


Decide to die but so does bro. He has kids and shit. I have a wife that for some reason likes me. Decide to trade fb and all social media for a week. Of the 3 musketeers one kills himself. The other 2 agree to swap info for quality week and only divulge wtf we want for 1 entire week. I bring on the guilt trip of bringing my wife on board. Bro do wtf he wants. I am restricted to no nudity and playful adult shit. Wtf ever.

>mayors

beaner detected

This.
Same here.
After 3 shitty years doing nothing, I'm slowly coming back to life.
Save that text and read every day after you wake up.

Sounds like school is not for you. Which is fine because it isn't for most entrepreneurs.

Start a business and see how that goes.

Non-degree parents always think their kid should get a degree for some reason. It's stupid.

You dumb motherfucker. Why didn't you study business? Fucking art? Are you for real? My parents would have kicked me out of the house if I wasted my time on that shit.

Change your major, talk to people, go out and drink, get a salarycuck job, then quit and run your parents business when they croak.

Damn. I have done both. Think about the people you know. Do you like the up beat people that are always in a good mood or the whiners.

Turns out they are happy because they bust their ass at instead and help others.

Just invest in Bitcoin