/TFG/

Keep dancing my puppet and claim you're not baited.

>samefags
>gets called out for samefagging
>samefags more

>BTFO
>Claims samefag
>Gets BTFO some more

And you look just as retarded when you refuse to supply your proof of claim.

u/Bearborg pls go

Zoz.

The difference is you are actually retarded, even if you think I look retarded.

>implying implications

Nice proof, again.

k

kek, that totally would make sense with the shitty troll

Go away

youtube.com/watch?v=KBI8Jliw6w4

EF's brother?

that'd be 4$ here. fuckin canada

most things here are crazy expensive but you can usually get a breakfast like that for 12-13 bucks

Why you be hating on Tori?

Fucking Canada. I was amazed at how little booze and tobacco was when I was working in North Dakota a couple of years ago.

I bought my boss a couple of big tins of Copenhagen Long Cut since he is a big time dipper, and what cost me about four or five bucks a tin at the Wal-Mart liquor store I stopped at would have cost over 28.00 a tin at a convenience store up here.

Who else /showerbeer/ here, since other butthurt truckers call your company.

i quit smokin when Export A hit 10 bucks for a 20 pack, that was about 12 years ago.. they must be about 15 bucks by now. beer here is 26 and change for a 12 pack, its fuckin brutal man

>26 and change for a 12 pack
That's what I paid for the shitty Coors lite in Australia, I usually have my own homebrew to take but my filter broke and I really need sediment free bottles as they get shook up heaps in a truck and I am not too keen on yeasty flavoured beer.

homebrew rules
~30 cents / bottle

>not putting it in your backpack in the empty game room before you walk into Denny's

Noob

>inb4 you can't hear anything

It works perfect I already tested it.

>inb4 Platronics Voyager

I got pic related 50% off 64.99

Well, I finally did it. I shit in a bag today while pissing into a milk jug. What has happened to my life.

You need a bucket so you can just get it all done in the one vessel.

welcome newfriend

>ear dick

Welcome to trucking! The real trucking. Not the romanticized trucking that gets overhyped on TV.

Signed on with CR England today, bought my own new truck and got to pick the color I wanted, now when I pass the road test I will be fully licensed. Not sure why everyone says its hard to be an owner op, my first payment isn't due for 3 weeks and I'll be rich by then.

I remember the first time too

>shitting diarhea in a garbage bag behind a Lowe's in Arkansas at 3 in the morning and wiping my ass with a pillow case

>shoving the whole mess down the storm drain praying the cameras can't see me

Or even better

>have to shit behind another Lowe's in the middle of the night
>just do it in a cardboard box and shove it under the bed so I can get some much needed sleep
>Lowe's employee bangs on my door in the morning
>open window to talk
>poor guy gets a whiff and literally yells WEW SON and backs up about ten feet
>tells me which dumpster I can use to dispose of it

>Signed on with CR England today, bought my own new truck and got to pick the color I wanted
Too far. Should've just left it at the above

Even I knew

>Signed on with (anything)

Should have just left it there. You'd get higher quality shitposts

Bearborg pls

>wiping my ass with a pillow case
At least you had a pillow case. I suffered a bad bout one time and was left with no shirts.

I always "borrow" rolls of toilet paper when they are easily accessible.

fuck that public washroom tp, that shit is horrible, not worth stealing
i just keep a couple ass friendly rolls on hand

$17.50 for a steak sanga and can of coke at the Puma Marlborough truck stop. I'm glad Halliburton paid for that.

>not keeping babby wipes in your truck

Wtf guys, come on.

I shower everyday. It's not hard.

>refreshing cucumber

That's what she said.

...

>every fucking trailer I've picked up over the last week has had something wrong with it requiring shop time
Fuck lazy fucking drivers

You must not like making money.

Go away

>"Excuse me, I have an incoming call from deep space that I must take."

Doggo's mouth looks to me like he is holding in a fart with all of his might.

>One of us, one of us

Absolutely essential for sleeper living.

Even that went too far. Everyone knows C.R.E will only lease you a red truck

Reposting because my filters didn't pick up this thread.
>Fucking hell, which one of your beta orbiters is this?
TFW I'll never be cute and girly enough to have beta orbiters...

Well, I don't know anything about trucking, but when a car of mine had that issue, it was a fucked wheel bearing.

What headset is /tfg/ approved? Inb4 none

We don't use headsets because we aren't niggers (most of us, anyway)

How do you talk while driving??

We don't. We are professionals and have our attention on driving the truck in a safe, courteous, manner.

Or maybe no one wants to talk to us. Whichever.

Sorry you don't know how to truck effectively.

My truck has a company supplied phone with handsfree installed.

you seem to be confused

Do you at least have a feminine dick?

LG Tone Active. Mic kind of sucks, but as long as you're not in a 10 year old columbia it'll do fine. Expect it to work for around 6 months.

One of my previous employers issued all their drivers these BlueParrott B250 XT+ headsets, which we got to keep.

They aren't cheap to buy, but they are well worth the money for sound quality and battery charge. Pretty comfortable too, although I personally don't wear mine unless I am actively using it.

>hit this piece of shit metal object pulling into a space because this truck stop only has blindside backs
>break off piece of plastic bumper
>call company
>company starts flipping shit
>says its an accident
>says call police
>pic
>call police
>4 officers show up to look at damage
>only your truck is damaged, PTL, we don't really give a shit, good luck with that
>fill out accident report for company

What the actual fuck happens when you really do damage or kill somebody?

Same thing, but they send someone out to take your truck.

Yeah, if nobody is hurt or dead the most you need is a police report to be filed for your insurance, then accident report for company.
>get sent to drop off trailer at repair place
>pick up rental from other place a few blocks away
>continue on my way

Shit happens, as long as you weren't completely stupid about it, the company probably won't hold it against you long-term.

>Do you at least have a feminine dick?
Sadly, no.

>What the actual fuck happens when you really do damage or kill somebody?
Look at what happened to Eminem. He got axed from the truck instantly, then fired, then blacklisted in the industry.
And that wasn't even injuring anyone, just knocking down a pole.

Eminem was a truck driver?

How else u think he made his money?!

Pic related

Can't make money with the brake on, pal. Time spent showering is time you could be rolling.

>sleep for all 10 hours of sleeper/off-duty time
>sit in truck while waiting 2 hours for dispatch to get next load
>sit in truck at shipper waiting for appointment time
He's right, lrn2truck. There's tons of opportunities to shower almost every day.
Also,
>being paid by mile instead of driving-hours
Must suck when you're stuck in traffic making no money. 100km/h or 1km/h, still making the same $22/hr rate while behind the wheel.

>he has to wait on dispatch to get loads for him instead of being stacked up
>he ACTUALLY shuts down for ten hours every day
Yeah, you don't know how to truck at all.

Careful now, you'll invoke the wrath of all the anonymous cpm drivers on here that are so insanely jealous of people that are paid per hour or are salaried, that they lash out when it's brought up.

>TFW I just deadheaded for seven hours and got paid $20 an hour on top of my day rate

Fug, twice now during this two day trip I have grabbed what is supposed to be coffee from two different gas stations, and both times I am pretty sure I got the leftover water from the Filipina workers flushing the coffee maker out earlier in the day.

I bet you can't even legally drive for 14hrs in a 24hr period.

>only 14 hours
Oh, you sweet little honey child.

>Legally
Oh you.

Don't you have to be union to get hourly

Okay, sure thing little government cuck. Have fun doing your daily pre trip inspection, weighing your loads, etc, just wasting your time while the rest of us are actually working and making money.

In sitting at a TA watching the game and every black man has his ear dick/galactic transmission device in. I never notifed...

Oh well I still like mine. But I do take it out.

Nope. Lots of non union, speciality cdl work pays by the hour.

Now to move on to the next level. Buy some baby wipes, small heavy duty bucket, kitty litter (which can also be used for traction in winter), and some scented garbage bags. Now you can take a shit like a king.

>tfw you'll never snuggle up in the back of allie knight's Peter Bilt with her QT dog and QT cat and get truccccccccccccced around the country enjoying the sweet montana mountain scenery

why even live

Allie you've been posting for days now, please go

Is chaining up really as easy as this goofy lookin dude makes it look?

youtu.be/TWmm2I5XypA

Yes. Although it's usually really fucking cold and dirty.

Hmm. I'm in Corning and going to Washington tomorrow. I'm guessing i5 is going to be fucked up after tonight. I've driven in snow but never ice, and certainly never in mountains in chain conditions. I'm worried about not knowing what I don't know, and trying to drive when I shouldn't be. How bad is too bad for my noob ass?

It's not impossible. Basically just a heightened sense of cautiousness. Take everything slow, be aware of upcoming turns, pay attention to the signs. If you think you should chain up, chain up. That's the easy part, at least much easier than doing it after you start slipping out.

Just don't be a fucking dumbass. It's not impossible. It's actually really comfy and fun once you get used to it.

HEY GUYS

Going to Montana today ^_^

Wish I had a qtbf laying in the back to keep me company....

>inb4 132 more stills captured from Ally Knight videos are mass posted

2 miles following distance. 15mph max speed. Do NOT use jake break. When you do brake do it lightly and watch that the trailer isn't swinging. Also keep a gun with you in case the pressure gets too much. Its very comforting to know you have an exit.

Thanks rook

>No engine brake at all

Lel. If you are bobtailing maybe.

That's what I was told. Is that wrong?

le sigh

I will, as I get paid cpm and hourly once at load unload point.

Thats a good idea. Thanks, will keep it for ron.

t. Truck spammer

I am not asking for much here. I just want you guys to admit it. Drunk, 2am, you really gonna say no?

...

That's good advice for a newer driver.

The more weight on the drives, the less of a concern it is for the jake to pull the rug out from under you, but until you have a lot more experience under your belt with how a truck is going to react with the weight of a load and the conditions of the road, its probably a better idea to not use it.