/ss13g/ - spessmen on a spess station

>giving the acks the "Vox" treatment and deporting them to some fetid shithole
Yes.

>fetid shithole
I like the Vox outpost
>fetid shithole
The acks will get a GRAND WIZAHDREE library and a magnificent holodeck with team gamemodes. There is no argument on this front.

antagonists aren't dungeon masters, they don't have that kind of power. that's the admin's job

side note: all our admins are shit dungeon masters. we need a special DM role that can spawn stuff and create fun events, but can't ban people

youtube.com/watch?v=0axs_A20MN8
rev marathon
help

Did you see the suggestions from last thread? I'd actually play skeleton sometimes if they were made. It's a win-win. A horribly out of place race is exiled completely from all interaction with other races, but in return the race gets a sweet fucking wizard mini-station.

>HoS left the turret console unlocked in the AI upload
>keep on turning it on to stun from disabled
>walk out
>get rev'd instantly
>go back in and turn it to lethald.

slate has always been shit

DEVILISH

never doing job changes ever again, you can be happy with your roll if you are gonna slip and metagame like that

ACFHJLNOQS
make spess great again

MoMMIs are not doorsluts.

>refusing to do job changes because someone made a fool out of you
>metagame accusation
BRAVO

A
D, but not ever bannable
E
G and H both are important
J
L for learning
dont care
I play most jobs
Q for all departments but science. Science gets R
T

You got a note bruh. Just don't do it again and you'll be fine.

How'd that work out? Did they manage to set aside the rhetoric to gather around the negotiation table?

>If only 2/3rds of the station weren't immune to zas tricks, 2/3rds are immune to slips, 1/2 immune to fire, 80% immune to shocks even if there was power for lethal (there isn't), 99.9989898999% immune to flashes, 1/4 having easy access to flashes to murder rape retard borgs that don't stick together from a locker, 1/3 of the station providing the means to blow up the borgs from anywhere aboard
>On top of being able to recall and purge subvert indefinitely until security snaps and laser acids the AI from existence so there'd be peace
Still sad ions don't fit in holsters anymore so you have to choose between the ion for fucking borgs or a shotgun for npc hostiles

Whenever you get antag

I love when someone says law 2 do this, as a MoMMi, I just *buzz and scurry away.

well meta game isnt the right word, if you need to kill me just do it, dont take me off station for the technical victory. How is getting slipped and auto injectored getting made a fool of exactly, you might as well getting stung by a ling being made a fool of

Can we talk about Research?

It's probably one of the most hated aspects of the game. Basically a player has to ignore everything around them for however long it takes them to jam all the items into the machine. Its not enjoyable at all. Usually the only reason it gets done is a scientist begrudgingly takes up the task after every one else in the department just says fuck it.

Even then the majority of the time, after the research is done, maybe a diamond drill, and some random item is made. And then thats it.

Its a bit better in high pop, but it still fucking blows trying to get the department even somewhat functional.

I mean, why not just lock research behind a timer? Or something if its going to be so dull.

>Not sticking around and responding with *comment every time they ask
Shits always funny.

We do it cause you're cute.

Anything you can do to make it enjoyable causes conflicts when there's nobody there to play it specifically due to how interconnected it is with other jobs in the round. My only argument against a time lock is that it'd inevitably be scaled to be slower than I could do it on my worst day while doing robotics prints and borging at the same time

I was going to space you on the roid but I guess the CMO got got earlier.

My survival rate went up 60% when i'd regularly take medbay stuff so they feel more obligated to give 3 chunks of synthmeat about me.

...

what about it

ah okay, well ignore that post

DEAR/DEAD SCIENCE:
Oh look, some sordid daft fucking idiot blew up toxins and you got ZAS'd for 15 seconds straight and popped your lungs, and so did the 3 other scientists. That's okay, it just takes a little surgery right?
HERE IS WHAT EVERY SINGLE LUNG SURGERY ENTAILS IF YOU WERE A SORDID CUNT AND DIDN'T GIVE MEDBAY SHIT ALL ROUND
>scalpel (SLOW, 75% chance to fail unless you go to sleep)
>hemostat
>retractor
>bonesaw
>retractor
>mother fucking BANDAID (50% chance to fail, no way around it, deals toxin damage on fail which doesn't go away unless I pill your worthless ass, likes to fail 3 times in a row)
>retractor
>bonegel
>bonegel
>cautery (SLOW)
>waking you up
Holy fuck, that's slow right? And I still need to do 3 more of these? You POOR FUCKING THING WHO HAD TO DO THEIR 5 MINUTE R&D TODAY, RIGHT? YOU DID DO IT TODAY, RIGHT?
HERE'S WHAT THAT SAME FUCKING SURGERY COULD BE LIKE WITH A FUCKING TRAUMA KIT (metal/glass only), LASER SCALPEL (tier 1 is metal/glass only) AND INCISION MANAGER
>incision manager (FAST, don't need to sleep)
>bonesaw
>incision manager (FAST)
>trauma kit (works 100% of the time)
>incision manager (FAST)
>bonegel bonegel
>laser scalpel (FAST)
WOW! YOU DIDN'T EVEN HAVE TO GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP. WASN'T THAT SO MUCH BETTER? MAYBE BUSTING YOUR DUMBASS LUNGS WOULDN'T BE SO BAD IF YOU DELIVERED THAT SHIT MORE OFTEN!

>tfw mining gets the uranium fast so I can get you guys the high-performance laser scalpel and incision managers
>tfw playing medbay and sci drops some bomb ass diddley
It's so great. Only shit sci's need lung surgery. Vet's just bicard, inaprov, and iron off into the sunset.

YOU KNOW WHEN ZAS LIKES TO BREAK YOUR FUCKING SKULL?
I COULD FIX THAT SHIT TWICE AS FAST WITH THE INCISION MANAGER TOO

THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR BEING COMPETENT, PLEASE COME AGAIN. SCIENCE NEEDS MORE PEOPLE LIKE YOU. I'D GIVE YOU HYPERZINE AS THANKS BUT YOU LITERALLY ALREADY HAVE EVERYTHING I DO.

Is there any reason we haven't tried to implement lava land besides the fact that we'd need to find a way to implement xenoarch into it?

I dunno what's more sad. That I hate having to stay fed and take alky to deal with the brain damage from the broken skull, or that one time I spent almost a whole shift with a broken arm thanks to a banana bunch in lowpop and it never really mattered after I passed out enough times to make it to some inaprov so I could treat myself.

Because there's 24 hours in a day and the people who put in the work to not be worthless don't care?

alky doesn't work for broken skull damage, it damages your brain organ

ADEHJKMORT

is there any reason our code is still fucking garbage

Fukken bone chips reeeeeee

A/C/F/H/J/L/M/O/R
S and T doesn't seem mutually exclusive; S just means some players know tricks to the job, T just seems like a good practice in general

Intigracy and cluster still exist.

The same reason you're not a coder yet

Our code would sooner kill itself?

Exactly.

post your SS13-based science fiction stories. i'll start:

A round lasting longer than half an hour.

An AI treated with reverence and curiosity by man and borg alike

An AI that doesn't want valids.

>A
>D
shouldn't be bannable but full blown validhunting is horseshit. Stunning a coworker, rifling through his shit and toolboxing him to death because you found a traitor/cult/whatever item with little to no suspicion ain't cool
>E
>G
I usually keep at least something small for self defence according to my job
>J
Triumph against odds is always fantastic to watch however
>L
>N
I'm still newish and don't static name, round transcending stuff doesn't make sense for my character
>O/P
I've had great rounds as chaplain (two last night) and other fantastic rounds as shaft miner. It really depends
>R
>S/T
I don't know enough about jobs like cargo, atmos or the sciences to really comment as I haven't played them yet.

Should I download this?
It looks amusing.

no and yes
one on the yes grounds: it is very amusing
two on the no side: it's rarely funny, only when the stars align
and if you ever do get into it, you can be sure you're in it forever.

>been playing since 2009
>help me.

It's a meme you dip!

>if you ever do get into it, you can be sure you're in it forever
Lets buckle up and get lynched at first 5 mins, then!

A,C (though it can make the round sucky in certain situations, it's not outright wrong), F, I,L,P,R(I feel like there should be an adequate level that can be achieved independently, but there should be interdependence to reach maximum efficiency), T.

how about we deport them to the morgue after cracking their fucking skulls

A, D, E, H, J, L, M, O, Q, T

>He wasn't around for the 7.5 hour round
It was surreal yet amazing as we continually got people who weren't worthless trash to keep shit fixed and cloned/podded/posi'd

Command purges the silicons and they keep the peace with a brutal electrified doorcrushing fist as murderboners and malicious shitters get cucked with the force of a petabyte of hate per picosecond

Absolutely not. If your friends cared about you, they'd stop you from getting hooked.
Even then, you'll burn through the magical time of when you knew nothing and be left with nothing but bitterness of the trash that infest this place until you're finally permabanned.

>Friends
Good thing I dont have any.

Then you need to be working out and volunteering, not playing autism: the diagnosistic tool

oh, and for the G/H question, I consider both to be robust.

The choice has been made.

Someone please post the comic where the innocent greyshit has to download assets because of metaclub

>A. Antagonists are meant to make a round interesting, even if without conflict.
>D. There are times where it is wrong to kill an antagonist.
>F. Whether or not I get greentext does not matter to me.
>H. I do not prepare for bad situations, and improvise well to survive. This is robustitude.
>I. My favorite moments in the game are those of triumph, whether it is mine or somebody else's.
>L. People should not be banned solely for incompetence, so long as it isn't causing massive harm.
>M. I enjoy having my ingame friendships transcend rounds, so long as it doesn’t break any rule.
>P. My favorite jobs are ones which allow me to achieve personal goals and play with the mechanics of the game, like Miner, Botanist, Xenoarchaeologist, Virologist, Xenobiologist, Cargo Technician, Engineer, MoMMI.
>R. Departments working at absolute maximum efficiency should still need some cooperation from other departments.
>T. Jobs which are made too easy or even partially invalid or useless should be reworked to keep all of the job’s existing features relevant.

...

It's a pretty damn fun game and one of the best f2p games ever made.

ADEGJLMORT

thx

A
D
E, only because I use the objectives as a general guideline to what I should do that round.
H, I prefer not being prepared even if it kills me, it's not interesting when you know what's coming and can fight it off.
J, always tell a good story whether you win or lose.
L, nobody will ever improve if they're just banned from jobs.
M, I like making characters and I like the idea of them actually knowing co-workers instead of everyone being a loner.
O
R
T, at least to keep things interesting.

Why are the mew waifus so shit desu

because mewtwo husbandos are better

>Dont know what Im doing
>Somehow get knocked out in the first minute
>People come to help me up
>Get up and try to find the Janitor place
>Fool around for a bit, not finding the place while everyone is wearing their underwear
>Go through a fancy-looking double door
>End up evicted into space and die
...That was interesting first round.

ye icked in the ock didn't ye

remember to read the guides

posting about events in the currently active round gets you banned on our server, better hit that mofuggin delete button

...

Hello, I would like to join the metaclub. Could someone please post the discord so that I may reap the rewards of my new metafriends?

How do I eat as a skeleton?

>All those posis and diona
God bless you miners, you guys were great

I believe skeletons can only eat raw meat.

What an interesting day.

You can only eat raw meat
You can inject the meat with nutriment and corn oil before hand to make it a little more filling

>die as trader
>spawn as diona
>almost immediately validhunted by yahir for being a nymph less than a minute after i spawn
>saved by hop at last minute
>spend round hiding in hachis bag to avoid yahirs attempts to murderbone me

reminder that yahir is bad

I hope people had fun with the dionae

Is the server down?

>"Trapped in a room with an autolathe? Are you for real?"

ah yes, cardboard. captured at last.

Read the rules of something before you play it dumbass

Should have RP'd as a bounty hunter caging nonhumans for sale.

Huh, connection failed.
Also for some reason everyone was in their underwear for the whole round for me.

update byond.

>IM GONNA RAM IT
>BATTER UP
>WHAT ARE MY CHARGES, ASSAULT AND BATTERY?

How do people talk before matches? What does it mean when people speak green?

Press O or click the OOC button at the bottom to write in OOC (Global chat).

Green is the color for the general radio. Each department has their own department specific radio channel with its own color.

Be careful about what you put in OOC. Nothing about the current round can be posted outside of it until the round concludes.

People use ooc and what you think is latin is probably someone speaking solely in tradeband, its another language you can use, under your ic tab you can change your current laguage if you like it.

OOC chat (Out Of Character), you can change it clicking the buttons on bottom-right or manually replacing
say "
with
ooc "
BUT you'll be banned for a while if you talk IC (In Character) on OOC, even if by mistake, so watch out.

also read these:

ss13.moe/wiki/index.php/The_Basics#Interacting_with_Other_People

ss13.moe/wiki/index.php/Rules

OOC chat with different colors are moderators.

are you seeing this shit

>bandaid
Literally who uses bandaids lmao sounds like you're just bad at surgery

I now am user, good to see.

if you see people talking in-game (not OOC) with other colors, it means it's another language. if you know that language you'll read it, if you don't know it it will be just gibberish for you; you can check your known languages from the IC tab on top-right