Howdie partner, my name is Richard Hammond

Howdie partner, my name is Richard Hammond

I'm a 47 year old British Cowboy (that's a fan of Americana for you foreigners). I drive Camaros and Mustangs (SS and Shelby) on my authentic Route 66 drag strip

Each day I train with my airsoft Winchester repeating rifle. This superior weapon has been protected by the US Supreme Court over 1000 times and is a guaranteed freedom in America. I have applied for my British air rifle license, which I should be getting anytime now.

I speak American fluently, both Southern and New York dialects, and can write fluently as well. I know everything about American muscle cars, which I always use as my daily driver.

When I get my American visa, I plan on moving to Detroit to attend the prestigious Ford Clinic where I can learn about their magnificent car culture. I hope to become a test driver, or even help assemble a V8!

I own multiple NASCAR jackets, which I wear around town. I want to get used to wearing them before I move to America, so I can fit in easier. I high five my elders and seniors, and speak Nashville dialect as often as I can but rarely does anyone manage to respond.

Wish me luck in America!

it's like those reverse weeaboos from japan

*Ameriboos.

Hammond is based desu

Euros that like America are the best

Would shoot guns with and teach him about baseball

>teach him about baseball

Of all the sports in America, you want to show him the one sport thats actually more boring than soccer?

Gas yourself if you're American, and neck yourself if you're not.

*westaboos

What other country in the western hemisphere are they going to emulate the redneck culture of?

>Poverty ball
>Watching players falling to the ground and crying in hopes of getting opponent red carded vs only way to take opponent out is by fast ball to the face

>showing europoors a sport even more boring than cricket

My friend described baseball perfectly for me once

It's a sport that's designed so that you can mostly get up and get a hot dog in the middle of and most likely miss nothing. It's really casual and you can spend a lot of time halfassedly watching it.

But boring?
Someone didn't see the last World Series game

>get up to get a hotdog and miss nothing

I once got up to go to the bathroom. Left my nachos by my seat. Come back to find the nachos trashed.

Turns out Ken Griffey Jr hit a home run ino my nachos.

Ausfag here

It's alright to watch a few plays or listen to, as long as the fucking pitcher doesn't take a fucking minute between each pitch

What Hammond would say about your car?

But our culture is a perverted piss take of Britain's culture, Australians are just the ancestors of Britain's scummiest criminals and best shitposters.

so what you're saying is, we're the real deal? neato

>Shows a gif of the one interesting thing to happen in the sport in like 60 years which isnt even a part of the sport itself

>Euros that like America are the best
no they are disgusting quislings that need to hang for their treachery

How does this manet not have a fucking ounce of masculinity? I really feel like hammond tries to compensate for his lack of masculinity by liking American things and I can see right through it.

More then that, it's designed so it can be on the radio in background where people can only pay attention to the good parts and work during the rest. TV is what made football replace baseball as there is more to see and is shorter to accomdate actual full veiwings.

>Drive a Honda
Get that Jap sheeit outta my sight right now before I pull out my Remington 870 Shotgun with Authentic Mossy Oak Camo Pattern and kill you deader than a Syrian Immigrant without the Coast Guard.

Ty based Hammond

Baseball is the only sport where everyone gets their shot, nothing is more American than that.

It's boring to play and boring to watch. Deal with it.

Nobody is implying Soccer is entertaining or fun

Okay coach.

>and I can see right through it.

yeah fuck off