Anybody here got visibly drunk at a company's party?

>In 13 years, I've never seen alcohol at any company party, whether it was a birthday, retirement, or Christmas party.

In Europe it is common, maybe not as common in the USA, since most of the business are kosher ;-)

I used to work for a specialty food/beverage distributor and retailer. We had a summer party and a holiday party. Always plenty of booze, big dispensers of homemade cocktails, kegs of beer, cases of wine. Some people got way too shitfaced. I once took home an 18 y/o I met at one (she told me she was 22) and fucked her senseless. She was a crazy bitch though and got fired eventually.

What are you talking about? The more hip millenials work places even have weekly company happy hours.

Who the fuck wants to get drunk with the people they work with? That sounds god awful. If i want to drink, ill do it with the people I actually want to hang out with and not those im forced to.

Alpha as fuck.
mirin
no homo

This.

Where is your office, Saudi Arabia?

Can someone tell me the benefit of office Christmas parties?

I've always hated them. They just feel like more work without getting anything done.

I'd prefer a simple end-of-year review and lunch.

I'm getting visibly drunk at a Christmas party at my gf's sister's house right now.

AMA

>adults can't drink

Lol wtf are you talking about? All parties at places I've worked serve alcohol. You in Mormon country or something boy?

I went to a work xmas party once that was in the conference room at a hotel. There was no alcohol. So i went to the hotel bar and got drinks and carried them back into the party, and proceeded to get drunk. The owners of the company were so pissed. I didn't care. Not a single fuck was given. I got hammered in front of everyone while they all drank soda. Didn't get fired or even reprimanded. Highly recommended.

If you guys actually work at places where where the holiday party does not have an open bar, I truly pity you.

What kinds of businesses are these?

Greentext details pls

i couldn't pretend my colleagues or what they are saying interest me any more and almost fell asleep.

I showed up to work this morning high as fuck. No one said anything to me about it, so hopefully all was well in the jungle.

As long as you're not in a governmental position, who gives a fuck if you get too rowdy?

Government used to be cool about drinking but the public gets so assblasted any time a public sector worker isn't as miserable as they are that No Fun Allowed is policy now.

communicating and networking with colleagues is at least 20% of the job. just go in, say hi to a few ppl, ask what they do and so on until they are drunk enough to gain info from.

got completely fucked at and ended up like 5 miles from a bar a few of us ended up at... still to this day idk how it happened..

There's only 8 of us at my company so my boss usually takes us to dinner somewhere. He buys drinks for everyone and is always first to get hammered. Last year, his wife had to come pick him up because everyone refused to drive him home.

>everyone refused to drive him home.

So not only did he provide your livelihoods, he also bought you fags drinks and you wouldn't even give the man a ride? I'd fire you all.

Occasionally they are fun. But yeah 90% of the time you're right.

Gotta separate work and play.

Does it count for the thread if I wasn't the drunk?

2 years ago I was a contractor with this company. I crashed their company party because fuck it, I'm in IT, and I know the door code to the back. They had an HR hambeast that literally everyone hated. She was in charge of insurance, which was hilarious because this bitch weighed over 400 pounds, and had so many medical conditions it wasn't even funny. She had some 5000 dollar office chair because of ADA bullshit (read: she was so fat she had to get a triple wide motorized reinforced chair to prevent loss of circulation in her legs)

She got drunk within an hour and absolutely shitfaced within 2. Stood up on a chair, took her shirt off while singing jingle bell rock, and then shit herself. The smell was so bad they shut the party down.

It wasn't worth seeing or smelling that. I don't even drink. I just wanted to gorge myself on pizza rolls.

My first Christmas party we had a private room at an upscale restaurant booked. Open bar, steak, etc. HR brought cigars for everyone and we were all drunk and smoking. Somebody brought weed as well lol

This year HR booked us a private room at a steakhouse, but the bar only served beer and wine. We all got smashed anyways and smoked Cubans in the room. Ubered home. It was a lot more tame this year.

>this bitch weighed over 400 pounds, and had so many medical conditions it wasn't even funny

Why would anyone go to these things? It just sounds like unpaid overtime, except you actually aren't producing any value and just wasting money.

Because you're not working you're getting free food and booze and hanging out with people. If you don't like your co-workers then don't go

Maybe if it was during work hours but fuck wasting my own time.

I get tanked on the regular with my coworkers at happy hour. We are just a self selecting group of alcoholics though, so there's no judgement.

I got black out drunk at our last company 'winter' party (owner is Indian and too cheap to have a party at Christmas time). I remember fading in and out of consciousness and getting into an aggressively animated conversation with my projects (very drunk) PM. I don't remember the topic, I just remember him yelling at me and putting his finger in my face. It didn't escalate beyond that. It was slightly weird for me the next Monday, but I realized everyone was smashed, and no one really knew what was going on. Me and my PM never spoke of it, and acted like it never happened. It helps that I'm one of the most popular people in my office.

>Why would anyone go to these things?
Because it's fun to get trashed with your coworkers outside of work?

Or is that too normie for you?

>unpaid overtime except you aren't working

Why do you give a shit about being productive if you aren't being paid?

Disregard the whole show up and eat 70 dollars in food that you didn't pay for part. Why the fuck would you work without pay?

Don't you like to have fun?

Personally, I don't find being drunk enjoyable at all. I don't get hangovers, or anything like that, but the actual experience of being drunk isn't entertaining to me.

That said, I'm not turning down tons of good food that I don't have to pay for if I happen to be in the area.

They were probably all drunk, ya' irritable dope.

Nice try. You wouldn't be in a company if you were only 13 years old.

No you fucking retard he said over the course of 13 years attending company parties hes never seen booze. Use your fucking brain.

Ayy,

>got a job in sales management
>been here for only 2 months, still on trial
>we have a regional partner event in north europe
>am told it's just boring conferences and info about market
>notice free beer
>manage to resist the till 5pm
>everybody grabs a beer
>i grab one
>two
>three
>four, i grab a literal fourpack and chug it in
>get my groove on
>never leave the beer table
>become fucking wasted
>go to the hotel
>wrong hotel
>drink till morning at lobby
>go to the 2nd day of conference
>fucking hungover, start drinking beer right away
>fucking black out
>7pm i open my eyes and am at a lake house with some foreign old people
>fuck it just keep drinking

I didn't even get fired but I did get a lot of weird looks from my co-workers after that.

you got trolled. use your brain

This one's got the tism, George. Call the retard wranglers.

wew lad this is me every time I drink.
I realize how retarded I was being and how much I looked like an ass. Then I realize just about everyone else I was with was also shithoused/blackout.

Good times.

You guys have shitty coworkers.

We used to have a competition: He who comes in last the morning after has to keep a hard bagel on their desk until next year's party. Called it the bagel award. It would be rock solid and stale.
Of course everyone would be hungover as hell, still drunk getting into work to avoid the bagel. They'd be running to the door.
One new girl left early and came back that night, slept under her desk, and screwed everyone who thought she'd lose.

I wasn't invited. Nobody likes me. It's entirely my fault.

*tips fedora*

You know, there are people who might actually like their job and can get along well with their co-workers.
Most people work the larger part of their life, better enjoy your job or fucking quit and search for something else

>be at Christmas party two years ago
>limited alcohol was being provided that you had to pay for
>everyone just goes outside to their cars to drink out of their personal stash
>by the time we're all curling (canadian ice sport), it's becoming noticeable that people are drunk
>eventually a black dude and another guy starting fighting in the parking lot
>they are rolling around in the snow, meanwhile they are blocking the production manager who is trying to leave in his car, he has to honk to get them out of his way
>later on we're all chilling, suddenly the same nigger comes in and throat slams this kid sitting next to me over some gossip
>chairs fly everywhere
>we try to pull him off, I was admittedly hesistant to put my hands on this nigger
>the nigger turns around and grabs another person trying to break it up and throat slams him too
>nigger calls us all punk ass bitches and leaves
>next Monday we all watch him walk out of the building after he got fired.

This nigger was an overall menace to the town, purportedly did time in prison in Nova Scotia. He was in his 30s doing drugs with teenagers.

Hopefully he's back in prison.

bump for more stories

Depends on the type of business.

I know an engineering consulting company that always serves alcohol to its associates, usually in the form of wine.

...

>dad owns company with about 50 employees
>annual Christmas party
>dad's a generous guy so open bar, expensive catering, etc
>recently started as "VP of Operations"
>really just means i tell people what to do and get paid a lot
>at Christmas party
>tell intentionally shitty jokes
>scowl at employees until they start forcing a laugh
>hit on married secretary
>obviously not interested but has to humor me anyway
>dare account manager copy his butt
>obviously doesn't want to, but i stare at him until he moves
>hang up printed copies of his behind around the office the next day

Life is good

Haven't been to a company party in decades.

Started to work at a chiropractor clinic on Friday, helping Physical therapy room, 4pm comes around and im handed a cup of wine, take it and drink it later.

The other workers drink it in front of their clients. No one gives a shit.

This job might get interesting.

I'M MAD

Got drunk at a company golf outing once. Some highlights.

>kept going around telling people I was from the future
>jumped out of my golf cart going full speed and did a barrel roll into the drink cart lady and proceeded to tell her I was from the future as I tipped her 20$
>jumped out of a golf cart while my friend was driving and landed next to my supervisor who was trying to put (he was pissed)
>told a senior manager that I was from the future and hugged him

Funny enough, my leadership team found it endearing. We bonded and they joked about it for weeks to come with me. Despite acting like a jack ass, it came out to my advantage. Depends on the people too I suppose.

Probably also helped that one of my coworkers outshined me by approaching our HR manager and telling him he didn't like him. He also laid down on the ground during a raffle event and started balling hysterically about how he was suicidal.

Good times.