Tesla

What does Veeky Forums think about this?

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=bRHcq_y0q-U
twitter.com/NSFWRedditImage

The logo is great. The OP is a massive faggot.

Tesla's are fine if you like all the fancy bells and whistles and are willing to pay for them.

I don't really want one at all for a few main reasons:
>I have no garage to plug the thing in.
>I want to drive my car, rather than let it drive me.
>I just don't want to spend that much.

sounds like you couldn't afford one even if you wanted to and you're just convincing yourself they're shit.
>literally the most advanced consumer vehicles ever created

>fast as fuck

>crazy ai safety features

>biohazard defense mode

>luxury interior

>dual trunks

>internet browser built in

>above average towing capacity

>not having to deal with stealerships

>adaptive front swivel bidirectional led drl

T. Elon Musk

This.

OP, this entire board iis full of poorfags who can't deal with the fact their autistic "hobby" will become completely obsolete and irrelevant in the next 10-20 years. Tesla is literally the most innovative and important car company active today and anyone who can't see this is either a luddite or has a massive case of sour grapes.

...

>biohazard defense mode
Cool, will this prevent the car interior from getting ruined when my wife gives birth to Chad's child?

>yfw ze germans beat tesla to a great affordable e-car while you keep paying premium to ride an ipad on 4 wheels an finance musk's wet dreams

Except literally everyone is currently playing catch-up to Tesla.

>luxury interior

Nicer than your shitbox. Not like you'd know what luxury is.

I just don't know or understand why their interiors are such absolute shit. It always feels like getting into an unfurnished room with an iPad sitting in the middle of it. For the money they should really hire someone to design a good looking and comfortable interior instead of letting the tech guys do it.

2/10. Try better.

german car industry is FAR behind when its about electric or self driving.

We may build good engine but its not very innovative anymore.

>germany
>build good engines
Yeah, no.

Except Mercedez cars have the same level of autonomous driving as any Tesla and have a non-shit interior and build quality.

Everytime I wear a Tesla jacket out at town, I get a lot of attention. My VW and Skoda jackets barely get any.

mexican ones don't count

They all have the same bosch sensors...

But VAG can't even make a simple timing chain right. Only God knows how many 1,2 liter gasoline timing chains I've changed.

Nice meme

Not even a meme, it's an actual problem for VAG. There's a reason they've got a ton of warranty claims on those engines.

>literally the most advanced consumer vehicles ever created
Powered by Panasonic laptop batteries lol
>fast as fuck
*On full charge *Only to 60mph
>crazy ai safety features
Like the "just shove me under a tractor trailer please" feature
>biohazard defense mode
Alex Jones tier air filter
>luxury interior
Maybe in 2008
>dual trunks
My trunk extends by folding the rear seats flat
>internet browser built in
Welcome to 2005 Tesla
>above average towing capacity
Good God I can't imagine the range hit
>not having to deal with stealerships
So paying MSRP is a positive thing now?
>adaptive front swivel bidirectional led drl
This has been a thing since the 50's

(you)
>What does Veeky Forums think about this?

Sorry, our gas station has no charger for your Tesla.

Sorry, the gas station can't charge your Tesla.


Sorry, our gas station can't refuel your Tesla.

Sorry, we don't have a charging station for your Tesla.

Sorry, our gas station has no charger for your Tesla.


Sorry, the gas station can't charge your Tesla.


Sorry, our gas station can't refuel your Tesla.

Sorry, we don't have a charging station for your Tesla.


Sorry, our Chevy Dealership only works for Volty Bolty cars. And no, you may not plug into our 220VAC outlet.

"Yes, AAA does tow Teslas on JerryDans."

Yes, allowing the manufacturer to always know where your car is and what it's doing as well as them having the possibility to brick your car remotely is so 21st century. Tesla is really the most advanced brand.

DRINK A VERIFICATION CAN

>1000 mini bombs under your ass

some dudes came to my town with 5 teslas,drove around all day for free,it has a mindfuck acceleration its ubelievable.I had a button on my pants on my ass,when he pushed the throttle i think i ripped thru his seat,hell i am so sorry for that but i wasnt able to predict anything like that

Teslas access to their cars is no different than any other manufacturers.

shit company
shit man leading it
shit cars

fuck that con artist for stealing tesla's name. Elon Musk is a massive fraudulent tool.

I drive and Edison.

It's much better than a Tesla, in fact. The Edison is quite similar in concept except it's not an autistic, destitute, recluse.

Why? I thought Elon was saving the world or something with Le electric cars and Le space travel and Le solar panels providing electricity. Also how are Le cars shit and how is Le company shit

Reddit Mobiles.
Literally all the hype about these cars, which are no better than a carrola and cost $100,000 is because of their viral marketing campaign tricking liberal pussies into thinking Tesla's are actually good.

All marketing just like Apple.
youtube.com/watch?v=bRHcq_y0q-U

>rich successful man does fun things and moves technology forward
>bitter autistic failure calls him shit on the internet
truly a mystery sherlock

>fast as fuck
in a straight line

>crazy ai safety features
ok cool, never been in an accident that i could have avoided but i'll admit it's useful

>biohazard defense mode
completely meme bullshit

>luxury interior
it's not really

>dual trunks
a $7000 porsche boxster has dual trunks

>internet browser built in
so does my phone which i have a mount for
needless to say, i'm not browing when im in my car anyway
pointless

>above average towing capacity
ok

>not having to deal with stealerships
does it have a warranty? dealerships are generally a good thing because you have more options than just sending it back to the manufacturer

>adaptive front swivel bidirectional led drl
whatever the fuck that is

shut up user
this will be our future you know
let me not think about it for as long as i can

ignorant stooge

>does it have a warranty?
Was that a real question you really have to ask?
>dealerships are generally a good thing because you have more options than just sending it back to the manufacturer
You think sending a car back to a manufacturer is an option for any car? Have you not owned a car before? Franchised dealerships are shit for honoring warranty. They have to fight the manufacturer to get anything approved, and if the manufacturer won't do it they just tell you "welp, not our fault, it's the manufacturer." Tesla doesn't have this luxury, they are the manufacturer and service the car as well. It's not an accident that there customer satisfaction is miles ahead of anyone else.

Why do people make posts like this? You actually have to asks questions like "does it have a warranty?" and mention "sending it back to the manufacturer" demonstrating you know absolutely nothing about any car, much less an expensive luxury car, but at the same time you offer up opinions on the interior comfort and storage space. Stupid!

Teslas are not profitable to build without government assistance. So, for that reason, I'm out.

Great engine tech, shitty batteries, horrible numale manufacturer hellbent on being the apple of cars

>whats wrong with us having remote access to your car? Do your have something to hide? Unnecessary "fun" perhaps?

have you not heard the horror stories of people who had to leave their car in the shop because it took Tesla months to fix them? Tesla is still a new brand and I guess while the Bay Area IT managers buy them out I'll sit back and wait. Eventually there will come a time when they'll be big enough to actually provide services to their customers and have range enough to get to work, at which point I will consider buying one as my daily driver.

>have you not heard the horror stories of people who had to leave their car in the shop because it took Tesla months to fix them?
Haven't, how about you provide a link?

Model S is a great $30,000 vehicle. It competes well with a base Cadi CTS or 325i. The meme acceleration isn't good for anything other than one drag race before it memes out and has to be recharged.

As a $100,000 car it is a failure.

We will see how the Model 3 does. Until then, its best just to let the apple fan boys who buy these things feel like they are cool.

>As a $100,000 car it is a failure.
>best selling luxury sedan by a massive margin
Wow, smart post, you come across as very intelligent

I so want to do an LT swap (MR) to a fuckin Tesla. Some richfag needs to back me, I should only need about $200k.

Better link a chart before another retarded post suggests an Avalon is a luxury sedan

Nice, once you get the money all you'll need to do is to learn the first thing about working on cars, shouldn't be hard to convince an investor

Dealerships are crappy and almost impossible to get rid of despite them selling sub-par vehicles, also they set the prices and finance.

kek
telling you that a 7k sports car has two trunks isn't an opinion you moron

its a fucking fact

manufacturers set the prices also dipshit
at least with dealerships you have multiple choices as well as discounts

Commercially Tesla is doing OK. They failed in china and overseas last I checked. I was referring to value.

It drives like a $30,000 vehicle. The 7 series is also only $70k.

Yeah man, the appeal of the S is that it has two trunks! Who cares how big they are, there's two! The Boxster is exactly the same!

So it drives like a 30k vehicle, is priced at 100k, and outsells a vehicle by 3x in it's segment that costs 70k. Yep sure sounds like a failure! Why are you commenting on how it drives when you've never driven one?

I love them but can't imagine owning them as an adult in his twenties. These things seen so unreliable

>using cuckdriod
Sad

K well it drives like a $30k car and they sell it for $100k.

Thats the answer to OPs question. Not sure where you are giong with this

>drives like a 30k car
Why does it outsell a 7 series by 300%, which presumably drives like a 70k car? Could it be that... and I know this sounds crazy... people that actually drive both cars are able to decide the Tesla drives better, while people who have never driven either (you), have no idea what they are talking about?

>luxury interior
this is hardly nicer than a miata

>Why does it outsell a 7 series by 300%

Because it's hip

That interior look like fucking plastic. Also, Satan confirmed

Nobody on Veeky Forums is allowed to have an opinion on Tesla cars because not a single person on here owns one.

>even though the company does not advertise, it's so "hip" that is sells 2x as much as an S Class and 3x as much as a 7 series, cars with decades of presence and mass amounts of advertising
Sure, that must be it! You figured it out!

Tesla doesn't follow usual car development cycles. So this leads to them putting out cars with constantly changing parts and some examples are less reliable than others.

Your Tesla is also constantly sending data back. So that they can use it all to develop better software and hardware. the software can be updated over the air. Which is putting Tesla way ahead of other car makers in autonomous driving. Since they have billions of real world miles to crunch.

The current Autopilot 2.0 system has 8 cameras. Though currently it only uses one of the forward facing cameras. The rest are still watching though, and sending data back to the hivemind.

oh but we do.

not me though. I have a LEAF.

i am a member of a EV club. So I have driven teslas a bit.

So essentially spying on the owners for the cost of some technological advancements

>spying
On what? Your cell phone provider and web browser are WAY more invasive than any car company will ever be able to be (they don't give a single fuck where you go or what you do, only fleet data relating to hardware/firmware at large, and don't be so naive that you think Tesla is the only brand that looks at data collected from their cars to improve their cars, EVERY brand does this)

Number of sales doesn't mean it's better. Luxury is about exclusivity.

>Le no marketing meme
Yeah because Elen Degenerate bought Justin Bieber a Telsa and broadcasted it on TV just because she woke up one day and said, "I'm gonna buy Justin Bieber a Tesla and give it to him on my show!" Right?

>Number of sales doesn't mean it's better. Luxury is about exclusivity.
Yes, the worse a brand sells, the better it is. Man you're so smart and enlightened! Every post is a gem, you definitely aren't making a complete fool of yourself.

>rest of your post
Don't know what you are talking about, I'm about as interested in celeb worship as I am having opinions on cars I've never driven.

By your logic Rolls Royce is a shittier car than a Tesla and a Miata is better than a Tesla

You're retarded

>By your logic Rolls Royce is a shittier car than a Tesla
By everyones logic a Rolls Royce is shittier than a Tesla

>a Miata is better than a Tesla
A Miata isn't in the same segment as any Tesla

You can only compare cars vs their competitors, especially when it comes to luxury cars which fulfill smaller niches. Let me refer to you to this graph, which compares cars in the same price range and target demo-

Is it still illegal to sell Teslas in Texas?

>Texas
>ever

> moving the goalposts

>literally the most advanced consumer vehicles ever created

Daimler S-Class or Rolls Royce Phantom would like to have a word with you.

>fast as fuck

In a straight line, decreasing with every launch.

>crazy ai safety features

Just like any other high class car in that price range. But unlike the Tesla, the Daimler or BMW safety features haven't killed anybody yet.

>luxury interior

Compared to other American cars or low-tier Japanese cars maybe, but not in the price range.

>dual trunks

That's actually cool though, I have to admit.


>internet browser built in

Even the newest line of Toyotas have it at a quarter of the price.


>above average towing capacity

>Implying city people ever need to tow something else than their mothers.

>not having to deal with stealerships

American problems don't apply world wide.

>adaptive front swivel bidirectional led drl

You serious?

It is plastic, even in the P100D. The wood options are plastic covered with vinyl.

I like EVs in general but I don't like Tesla's cars.

>I want to drive my car, rather than let it drive me.
this

Tesla is THE fastest car. End of discussion.

If You can't accept the fact that IT IS the future, you're just some trump-voting dumb bastard.

it's well advertised bait. they also prove that the educational system is horrible, apparently there are thousands of people without the most basic physics and chemistry knowledge.

>reaching this hard

I want a Model X P100D and Model S P100D. Literal dream cars. I don't care about anything else.

How does it make you feel knowing that Elon's penis is larger than yours?

>fastest
You mean quickest. My 99 Maxima is faster with a top speed over 140mph. And even then, pic related is just as quick.
There are non-production vehicles (both ICE and Electric) that are even quicker, not even getting into purpose-built drag cars that hit in the mid 1s on 0-60 acceleration.

>AI safety features

Into the trash

Teslas are notorious for their non-luxury interior.

If you have ever sat in a premium german car, you'll quickly realize they put a higher focus on how comfortable the interior is.

The Tesla has it's benefits, but weight is a huge factor in range so they can't put giant leather chairs like a combustion vehicle.

>The meme acceleration isn't good for anything other than one drag race before it memes out and has to be recharged.
>Meme
>Meme
>Meme
Could you sound more like a faggot if you tried?

After winning everything that could be won with ICE's they moved over to Formula-E, already having working prototypes of "teslas" in 1993 they are waiting for the right moment to monopolize the market.

>We may build good engine but its not very innovative anymore.
makes me facepalm, don't give in to meme's like these
faggots.

Have some fucking pride son, im not even german but i know sure as fuck they are the most innovative car industry, always have and always will be.

>You can only compare cars vs their competitors, especially when it comes to luxury cars which fulfill smaller niches.
>proceeds to compare an electric vehicle to conventional ICEs
Stop being a retarded fanboy. Tesla is unique in that it uses a completely different technology which is it's main selling point. Aside from price it is no way a competitor to conventional luxury saloons - they appeal to completely different customer desires. Someone who wants to enjoy themselves in a cushy leather backseat while chauffeur is dealing with the road is not going to settle for a spartan electric toy with range limitations, likewise someone who is passionate about the latest greatest tech wouldn't trade it for the excessive status luxobarge - if it weren't for Tesla's technology most IT yuppies wouldn't be shopping in this price segment at all. This has nothing to do with what 'drives better' because both cars fulfill the basic function of transport equally well. If you're trying to use statistic as an argument, then at least learn to fucking reason. Otherwise you sound just as retarded as Apple when it starts to compare their Watch sales numbers with luxury Swiss mechanicals, even though the products have completely different target clientele and different purpose to such an extent that they virtually don't share a market.

>Daimler S-Class or Rolls Royce Phantom would like to have a word with you.

This. What normies don't realize is what Tesla does isn't really groundbreaking, they're just really good at advertising it, sort of the Apple of carmakers.

Take the self driving features they'll have for instance. People are already assuming a fully automated "I don't have to do shit anymore" system. In reality, I bet it will be little more than the highway control system makers like Mercedes have had on their S-class for a couple years now.

Elon Musk, the greatest genius of all time, will invent and produce the super battery and we will all drive Tesla in 2̶̶0̶̶2̶̶0̶ 2030.

Can we see some of these Tesla advertisements you are speaking of? Where was it, TV? Magazine? Billboard?

> weight is a huge factor in range
> car weighs nearly 5000lbs

I didn't mean ad space itself, rather what they keep announcing to the public.

Viral internet campaigns you twat. Half of reddit's front page is filled with Tesla this, Tesla that.

>Thinks he can react quicker than a computer

The computer only reacts as fast as it's programmed to.

Which is a lot faster than you're dumb ass

Nope

>My reflexes are faster than electricity

>TFW never driven a Tesla

A-at least I h-have a Volt...