ITT: Things that immediately make you not interested in a car

>rod
>knock

Kek

>Engine runs strong.
>Needs fuel pump, have the parts just haven't installed it.
>Shifts great! Grinds in 2nd sometimes.

I like older civics, especially stock, they seem like fun and fine dailies that are good on gas, but like,
most civics that aren't sedans;
>covered in dents
>more exterior paint colors than there are genders
>using a worn donut
>stripped interior/in shambles
>spacered wheels
>cut exhaust
>chrome intake and engine trim on corroded engine
>quick release steering wheel
>no working gauges
>covered in stickers
>200k+ miles
>says nothing about it running or driving
>$4500
NO LOW BALLERS I KNOW WHAT I GOT

>Future collectible

e.i. some boomer's gonna charge you two thousand more than it's worth because he thinks he's currently entitled to the appreciation it may or may not incur after he dies.

Shopping for 951's right now and this is my life.

>go to look at car in person (different car), VIN has been covered by a piece of paper

nani?

For what fucking purpose?

There's this dealer that is near me, does not give her vin because she could get "scammed". I'm starting to hate people last few years

Because there are people that literally think you can steal a car by forcing a title in your name by taking the VIN. You can't explain to these people how stupid this sounds.

>It happened to a buddy of mine I know what I'm talking about

Cool story bro. The cars in question were a rusted to shit Tacoma and an 05 Grand Marquis with a wheelchair lift on the tow hitch. Take from that what you will.

She's lying because the car is a pile of shit and she's trying to pull a fast one. Confirm this by asking if you can jack the car up or take it to your mechanic.

People who list 190Es as "E class"
Any kind of mods, even if they're "upgrades" (unless they came stock on higher trims)

Any sick mods
Pictures are all at night upside down or shot with a potato
Ad is in spanish
Black finger blocking license plate
Trash visible in interior pics
Lost title bill of sell only
Female owned
Inspection out of date
Any 4x4 owned by a less than 30 year old white dude

>Broken english
>Great project car
>$14,000+ S-Chassis
>Excessive rust
>Salvage / lost title

I was gonna buy an S13 one time and the guy tried to sell me a title for a completely different year....

>putting the same ad in 12 different cities
>dealer ad for 0% down on a tacoma blah blah whatever showing up 40 times when i search for the word "celica"
>the ad text is literally just "nice car any questions jus ask"
>every picture is taken by an 83 year old man with parkinsons
>rally tape on the headlights
>seats are ripped to shit (HOW does this happen? I have never ripped a seat)
>missing service manual or spare keys
>"test drives for SERIOUS BUYERS ONLY" bitch my seriousness depends on the test drive
>putting 223 in the mileage spot when your car has 223,000 miles
>entering $1 for a price for literally any reason
>putting no price anywhere in the ad
>putting no price in the title but putting the price in 1 obscure spot in the body
>using photos from old shows the car was in but saying "car no longer has x wheels, no longer lowered, car now has bump in right rear fender" instead of just using normal current photos
>check engine light on, even if they say why

>single lady owner

I don't know why this always spun as a positive in car sale ads. I've never known a female who has taken proper care of a vehicle.

>no interior photos
>cheap shit alloy wheels
>one female owner
>cash price xxxx, as if I am going to pay in shiny beads instead
>needs xxx but i have the part / easy fix haven't had time
>council estate
>will swap for jetski
>broken english
>future classic
>car is in showroom condition, but looking at the photos it is fucked
>cheap ditchfinder tyres

>Only single picture is from google earth

>NOT
>SKYLINE, SILVIA, SUPRA, EVO, STI, M3,

It's for some shitty base model merc

Fuck I hate that.

>not for the faint hearted

>certain cities that strongly indicate a turkroach owner
>"tastefully modded"
>aftermarket shifter, pedals, steering wheel etc
>any scratches that indicate a female driver, curb rash
>stickers of any kind, especially christian fish stickers
>certain part of the car is always left out in the pictures
>contradictory description: "owned by enthusiast" + "fixable rust there, there and there"
>suspiciously low mileage on an old car that is not stock with perfect paint
>no pictures of the engine bay
>no interior pictures
>car is parked on grass
>car is parked behind around bushes behind some shed

>Gingers that like cars

They watched the history channel and think some restomodder is going to pick it up just as it is and turn it into a drag car.

>no pictures of the engine bay
>car is parked on grass
You are weird.

>30+yo car
>"minor rust"
>no shot of engine bay
>no shots of undercarriage

Do they really think they're fooling anyone?

>Mechanic's Special

>registration was up last July but I'm such a pathetic lazy worthless faggot that I couldn't be bothered to pay $20 for a non-op so there's like $600 in DMV back fees lol

>use photos of the model found online

>living in a place with registration backfees

fucking commies

German here

>fucked orthography
(I seriously would never buy a from someone who's too fucking dumb to spell the most simple words
>Einmannfrei
>999.999 kilometers
>x don't work but should be an easy repair (fucker has no clue but assumes that it should be easy)
>y don't work but I'll give you the parts with it
> super rare edition (that only the seller thinks is rare)
>sites that show you brand new cars first no matter if you selected used only and even typed in a maximum price

>2 lady owners from new

>melanin enriched thumb covering license plate

>ad in spanish
>comma ellipses
>can't spell worth shit
>ALL CAPS
>1two3fourfive6
>"easy fix"
>covering the license plate with a finger
>axing
>no low ballers
>I know what I have
>show room condition
>no registration or title
>dealer ads
>$1 or no price
>shitty photos of unimportant areas
>instagram sticker

sideways photos

>we speak Türkçesi
>only highway miles
>FÄRT GUT

>owner is posing nude on top of the car

where are all those furries with their cars

Well you should expect to pay a premium for any turbocharged Porsche.

FIRST TO SEE WILL BUY!!!!!!!!!!!!

houston.craigslist.org/cto/6060205640.html
>speedometer doesn't work
Kek. I kind of want it.

>2 god damn paragraphs of this shit
>Lists radio, upholstery as features
>Doesn't list what packages it comes with

>"simple fixes, just haven't had the time"
>"great project vehicle"
>"small wiring problems"
>anything over 3000 for a pre-99 truck

Fucking this. I'm looking for a 94-96 buick roadmaster wagon or fleetwood and I want one with the tow package. Of course if I call and ask in person they have no fucking clue what to look for. All I need is one engine bay shot to see the big mechanical fan shroud or not to see if it has the tow package or not. No fan shroud, no tow package. It's that easy. I had one old boomer ask what a fan shroud was. Instant hangup and never call back.

>Pic related, see the big ass shroud in front of the engine with the yellow sticker on that that says caution - fan? That means it has the tow package.

>no pictures, only text
>no text, only pictures

>trash in the footwells visible on the photos

>mismatched tires

>"small noise when car is warm, probably nothing"

He doesn't like dealing with trashy people. Trashy people park cars on the grass.

>buying a car from human garbage.

Hasn't it occurred to you that people might park their cars in nicer spots for the ad's photo shoot? I also wash my car in my garden. Yes, what a trashy thing to do.

Some shadier dealers will cut you a key from a vin without proof of ownership.

You're a very frustrated, sad individual aren't you?. I bet you have one friend and even he secretly hates you. Try being a little more forgiving and understanding in life, it might head off the early heart attack you're lining up.

>thumb in front of license plate

The Ads That Capitalise Every Word In Every Sentence Get Me

if people could steal cars through vin numbers, wouldnt the thieves do it that way as opposed to physically breaking into your car and drivng it away?

>houston.craigslist.org/cto/6060205640.html

I looked at this car a week or so ago when I was browsing >manual >under $3000 cars recently.

We should go look at it together like we're a gay couple. The dude might let it go for practically nothing.

>selling shit shitbox piece of shit for 300 bucks
>flat out claim in ad its a piece of crap but it starts and drives so 300 bucks
>people keep texting me with retard shit like
>giv u 50 dolla 4 it
>then an hour later from the same retard
>giv u 80 dolla bru
>cool guy shows up and pays 300 cash, give him the keys and he comes back a few days later to take the car
dunno why there's so many fuckwits trying to buy cars, how do those morons get licenses?

Truck tax and idiots that perpetuate it piss me off to no end. Some dealership tried to sell me a ten year old base model Chevy, with an accident on the report, for around $10,000. Best part was that also had a repo, was owned by a construction company, and was right over 200k miles.

Was selling my old car for $900
>ey bro would you sell it for 200
>text back "no"
>ok bro hey I had to ask
No you didn't. It was a shit offer on a halfway decent car and you didn't even SEE the car in person.

Because they aren't driven hard.

Salvage title

less stress on engine/transmission vs. almost certain lack of proper maintenance

But they don't get maintained usually.

>car hasn't been washed before photos taken
>interior hasn't been cleaned up and vacuumed before photos
>babyseat in the back
>ring [ethnic sounding name] to come have a look
>female owner with vanity plates and fluffy dice hanging from the mirror
>will trade for x

I don't mind if a car has been driven hard, especially if its relatively new and low kilometres. As long as its been maintained and hasn't been flogged during track days, then it's okay for me. I'd much rather buy from a white guy who is older than 30 than from ANY woman, because I know the woman wouldn't have maintained the car properly.

>selling my Polo GTI for $20k
>get text messages and calls from greeks/italians/lebs/other wog cunts offering me less than $15k

Yeah, I'm going to sell you my car for $12k because you think I'm desperate for a quick sale and you because you called me "bro", you dumb cunt.

Kill you'reself nigger. If any man, especially an older one, doesn't know what the fuck a fan shroud is then they certainly don't know other toddler-level basic shit and the car has been neglected and they most certainly need to be gassed.

As long as they get regular *dealer* maintenance. It should be fine.

>I don't mind if a car has been driven hard
You most definitely should. Though it mostly depends on the car. I wouldn't be really bothered if I was buying a say a Mustang that had been driven hard, but I would probably run if it was a Civic/Corolla/etc.

You expect the Mustang to be treated like crap. You don't expect the Civic to be treated the same.

But I do agree with you, 30+ white guy cause his life is already over and he just lazily commutes to work.

>find a car owned by an old couple that had regular services its entire life and never got driven hard
best of both worlds my good man

is it anything like a barrel shroud?

State in ad i wont take less then a certain amount.Hey bro would you take less then you said you would?I can toss in some adjustable screwdrivers and ratchets.Mother fuck i have a full building worth of tools i don't want your shitty harbor freight toys.I cant fucking stand selling cars.
On the other end of the spectrum i cant stand when people price there car 1000$ above kbb value and thats in perfect shape with all the options.Managed to talk an older couple down from 3 grand to 2 for my sc400.Kinda feel like a cunt tho.Really nice people and they gave me all the paper work sense 1992.New ecu tires radiator suspension ac unit and whole bunch of stuff.Even got the original receipt for the car.It sold for 42 grand$
Depreciation is the reason i will never buy a new car.Cause some some jerk off can buy your baby 20 years later for 2000$

Arnt you worried about chemical run off hurting the vegetation?

Nice Saab.

>You most definitely should. Though it mostly depends on the car. I wouldn't be really bothered if I was buying a say a Mustang that had been driven hard, but I would probably run if it was a Civic/Corolla/etc.
If hard driving hurts a car it was shit to begin with. Abusive driving is different though. Driving a car when hot, clutch dumps etc.

I assume hard driving means abusive driving. i.e i would consider taking a Civic to redline hard driving

Are you saying red lining is abusive or hard. I don't think it's abusive, I think doing it occasionally, at least once a tank, is healthy.

I sold my sister's golf, man it was gypse city, every other guy was buying it for his son, but when you ask, hey should your son see the car first? Then they all work at golf dealerships and had this module before. I countered later on saying so your gonna flip this right? You own a used car dealership and are looking for more golfs right? Maybe I can go down a bit. Not one was honest and even talked about how it's there day job fliping cars. I was Bellow blue book and it wasn't even my car to sell, so knocking a few hundred for him could have been doable.

Or they go through the script, I see you have it slightly Bellow blue book, but what about the timing belt? That costs six grand you know And I remind them, this car has 29k miles on it, the timing belt is fine.

I almost conned a dumby bounce check scammer into doing it through a eBay listing, him not understanding that he'd couldn't take back the money from PayPal. I chewed the fuck outta him explaining the scam out for him and how he messed up.

Ended up selling it to a middle age white couple who said they apreacated my slightly lower price and listed problems and liked the crazy low miles. Cash in hand, done in half an hour.

I ended up making a bit of money myself in that deal, and I could deffinetly see how gypsies can make a living just dumping out lowballs and then lieing like crazy in ads and faking transfer papers.

When I bought my car it the big thing was making an appointment to go see the car, with cash in hand full asking mind you, but the guy forgetting that he already sold it to someone else. That was a fucking fun 3 hour drive

>"Know what I got"
>No test drive without cash in hand.
>Engine ran strong before it was parked 3 years ago.
>My loss is your gain.
>No interior photos.
>They don't tell you the general area of where they are located.
>Anything aftermarket.
>"MUST SEE SHOWROOM CONDITION ONE OWNER"
>Tiny pictures.

>Asking $5000 but will take $4000
>Listing title includes color of car and/or the words "Selling a"
>TRADES ONLY
>Something something doesn't work, have all the parts SUPER EASY FIX. Selling instead of fixing.
>Engine has some lifter tick. All pictures are on a car trailer.
>Detailed accounting of sweet mods bro with prices. $3000 car + $8000 of Autozone mods = $11000 car amirite? NO LOW BALLERS

Once or twice? No. But consistently? Yes.

Using varying numbers/number words protects you from scammers though. If you're using CL, putting in your actual email/phone number can be picked up by bots and you'll start getting a shit ton of spam by bots and some guy who says "he can help you sell your car for a commission". If you look it up, it's actually a recurring problem in many different states. If you use the CL automated email system and put your phone # in numbers and words, you won't get those calls. It also kind of separates the jackasses from the people truly interested because they have to have common sense to get your info lol

People thinking they're smart and can make a quick buck. I'm trying to sell a Lexus right now that has a combined KBB/NADA value of about $6,200- $6,400, but I'm only asking $5,500 OBO (so I can get "lowballed" and still make what I want to, and it needs work), and I can't tell you how many emails I get asking if I'll take $2,000 cash TODAY.

>"this car is FAST"
>Base model SAAB 9-3 making 175 HP

sometimes mods can be good, ie if they did a drum to disc swap or if a year is known for having a shitty fuel pump and they replace it with a new and higher flowing one

>30yo shitbox
>completely blown rear main
>wrecked driver's side fender from collision
>1100 obo

The fuck is wrong with people? I just sold a winter beaten dodge neon to a kid who wanted a rally car, running and driving, for 350 dollars, and some fuckstick wants nearly 3x that for a 30 year old corolla that was hit, and needs the engine dropped.

I hate negotiating, too. How do I get this for less than 500 doll hairs?

They list the price as $1 or some shit to get out of max price searches. Fuck you cunt, I wanted a $5k car, not a $5001 car, not your $7.5k shitbox

>everythings all fucked, its going to cost x to fix and take y time, youre not going to get it for even close to 1100 and you know this, heres 500 bucks cash take it or leave it
just know there is probably even more wrong with it then that

if i didnt have to work and got bored i would just go around calling these $1 ads and setting up meetings and showing up wasting their entire weekend afternoon specifically avoiding negotiating until the end and then pull out a single dollar from my wallet when i go to buy it and then proceed to berate them when they get all buttmad

>modified car

tags: 240 miata drift honda 300z vtec turbo bmw datsun import cummins powerstroke duramax Mazda Honda Nissan Toyota JDM tuner civic 240sx Miata mr2 Integra Sentra Celica 350z, 370z, Nissan, Infiniti, g35, g37, lifted, powerstroke, cummins, duramax, s2000, mustang, Camaro, challenger, fast, 240sx

YEA LEMME TRADE YOU MY DRIFT/DURAMAX/240SX/CUMMIS/CHALLENGER FOR YOUR POS

>if i didnt have to work and got bored i would just go around calling these $1 ads and setting up meetings and showing up wasting their entire weekend afternoon specifically avoiding negotiating until the end and then pull out a single dollar from my wallet when i go to buy it and then proceed to berate them when they get all buttmad
Holy shit, I should do this

This is at least the 4AGE engine, correct?

I'm trying to pin down which of the 4 model corolla this could be for that year

Oh yea, engine is rusty btw. If I could get it for 500, I could tow it for 150, and fix it for about 350, and have a rally car for about 1000, but that's a pipe dream

>fucking with $1 fags
You're doing god's work user

The seller's just a dick or a condescending asshole.

>penis in front of license plate

>car has been modified
Fucking dropped. The last thing I want is to inherit some kid's pile of missing fasteners and general fuckups

I always just search minimum 1500 to max whatever to flush those (and the $100) fags out of my search.

then offer less. start at 350, and when they start with their "B-B-BUT MUH (insert trope as to why their piece of shit is 3x the price of its actual worth)" you negotiate up to 450/500. especially because it has an accident.

Not so much that I won't buy, but frustrates me to see in the ads.
>Listed as one kind of tranny
>check photos, it's another
fuck
>listed as one trim
>it's a completely different one
fuck
>listed as the sport trim
>they are just badges and kit on top of a base trim
so many "M3 F1s"
>only exterior shots
>or interior shots where you can't see shit
>no engine pics
I understand some sellers don't know why it's important but it's frustrating
>covered plates
like why negro, I'm still gonna ask for them
>aftermarket generic "cold air intake"

Things I don't buy:
>no title
>easy fix
>owes whatever
>panel gaps that say it was involved in something but seller will not mention
>no price or 1 on ad
>salvage
>Non stock 4x4 over 5k
>racing clutch
>cvt/dsg
>won't give vin/plates before meeting

No need for worries.

would be useful to know if you can go to the theater with the guy desu

No air filter, had a friend buy an engine that was run without one for two years and had scarred cylinder walls. Ran only thirty miles after he bought it.

"bill of sell"
"I have this car for sell"
God fucking damnit, reading that anywhere pisses me off more than boomers using a fuckton of ellipses or commas instead of ellipses.