I was at a meeting with Ben Brode recently. It was late, all of our other colleagues went home, and we had to get some things straight for the Un'Goro release just between us. I was behind in a lot of things so now I had to work later than I'd like to stay. After a lot of progress, we started to become lax and started chatting casually.
"You pre-ordered the Un'Goro expansion yourself, right?"
"Y-Yes, Mr. Brode." I anxiously wimpered.
"There is actually another addition to the preorder that only I reserve to people I've met." He starts caressing something under the table.
"Are you interested into what I have to offer?" Ben Brode said as he leered at me.
I notice after he asked if I pre-ordered Un'Goro, the table slowly lifted from the floor with my work laptop...and he obviously wasn't lifting it with his arms...
At this point, I felt intimidation, and sweat is dripping from my forehead...there was a force beyond me that I was unwilling to face.
He stood up, and immediately, the table and everything on it was thrown to the end of the room. I fell off my chair and on my ass to the floor. As I was crawling, collecting my glasses and work laptop, I noticed I was slowly being overshadowed by something.
"What...What is that?" I gasped and looked up.
There was something obstructing 90% of my view of Ben Brode's person, stemming from what seems to be his crotch, and it's dripping a clear gooey substance through his over-stretched black dress pants.
"It's the...Un'Goro...expansion...ha, ha, ha." He continued, "And, you, Hearthcuck, are going to taste the Un'goro pre-release."
I ran to the end of the room toward the door, but I realized I could not pry the table that was thrown there earlier quick enough.
He looked at me with a stern face walking slowly to me, and he whispered, "Open your Un'Goro crater."