ITT:

No fucking idea what this is or what it does. Had it when I bought it and haven't touched it since.

Looks custom.

Mines not mysterious since I put it in, but I've never had to use it, it's the "Emergency E&E button that launches flares, deploys smoke, drops caltrops and delivers a wet shot of nitrous

maybe a toggle for disabling abs or traction control shit

>tfw no button

sick shop job

your car can cancel the Illuminati?

Change illumi cancel to illumi notty

I have pressed all the buttons, but have yet to throw the switches under the hood. one is a hardware switch for ABS, the other traction control. Traction control has a button in the cabin and I haven't tracked it yet so I don't need ABS off.

suzuki swift?

That's a neat feature. It lets you know when Batman is about to drag your ass out of your car for a beatdown you criminal scum.

I'm scared to press it I might start a fixation for trench coats and have visions of shooting up my school.

For metal biased cassettes

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tape_bias

I don't know if I need manual farting or not

Tfw no rear seatbelts to switch off for uppity passengers

>implying you never go to bat country

Why exactly would you turn off ABS on the track? Do you seriously think you can cadence brake better than a computer thinking at a million changes per second on dry pavement?

No one who turns off ABS on the track thinks that. It's just to feel more agency as a driver. Same reason people prefer manual over dual clutch automatic with flappy paddles despite the latter being objectively faster.

Benchrace pls go

Tfw no passengers

self destruct

I think my father's E21 had something like this. I'm pretty sure it was an aftermarket alarm.

I have a "c.diff" dial, no idea what it does. it changes the colors of this thing in my dashboard

>not a BMW

One job

My 91 miata has a switch toggle under the ignition portion of the dash. No clue what it does . No owners manual either

MR2?

It's a new-ish car, so I read the owner's manual to find out what all the buttons do.

I don't use the phone controls, because the last thing I tried to connect to the car's bluetooth bricked until I could plug it into the computer at home.
There's also the 'TA' button which interrupts your music to scream traffic broadcasts at you at random intervals. I don't use that either, because any time it'd be of any use, I'm usually stuck on a single route anyway.

gives you mad diarhea

You're right, now it just has a pointless knob.

>Stealing jokes from c&d

kek'd heartily

I think it changes brake sensitivity, lock probably means braking without ABS

There pedals they make the car go

...

I may press it someday

some warning for automatic cruise control?

My PT Cruiser has an 'O/D OFF' button, which also engages the second cooling fan for the radiator.
It's for towing mode... which was an option for only one year and was installed on less than 50 cars.

It's basically a trailer hitch receiver, that button, and an extra radiator and extra oil cooler.

>04 Benz ML350
>ESP On

>Knob
>Its an auto
>confirmed for badge whore.

You are the one that is a pointless knob!

Actually you're an OK fella, I just like cracking wise. Have a nice day sir. Unless you are a lady,then have a nice day lady.

I just have this little switch that has no wires going to it on the back side at all. It's not factory. Might rig a light bar to it...

My friend's old Forester has a button like this.

Pretty sure that one activates the force field

>not having constant real time force field
base model pleb

you can push the tires SLIGHTLY farther than most ABS systems allow.

Kekd

>car has a switch some previous owner installed
>waiting for someone in the parking lot
>flip it on and off
>leave it off
>car won't start

my fj doesnt have that

or a thief deterrant, not like anyone would fucking steal an FJ. sticks out too much.

Hate when previous owners can't put something centered.

Yeah no shit...I might take a shot at remaking the switch.. It's janky as fuck right now, it's been broken in half then super glued back together on the reverse side of it.

Not to mention they cut the dash instead of using one of the 5 unused actual factory switch slots.

Center differential controls

Are you just pretending to be retarded? It adjusts your center diff lockup.

controls how much power can move front to rear
locked will be 50/50, not sure how much unlocked shifts power. it's basically for rallying and other driving where you want a consistent driving profile from the car, rather than some variable thing that changes based on a computer.

The two buttons to the right, I don't know what they do. It isn't cruise control (it's on a stock-paddle thing on the steering) neither the brightness for the displays and gauges

Not to mention most ABS systems pulse to regain traction, a human can react more linearly to locking which can be better for cornering.

Fellow s60r owner reporting in

...

dash dimmer or brighter

>my car doesn't have any pointless buttons thanks to the idrive knob
>thanks to the idrive knob

You mean "thanks by Magneti Marelli" (Fiat)

>Thanks to

fix'd

Those do control the brightness of the dash lighting.
If they don't seem to work then consider checking fuses? idk user

On a similarly related note I always turn the dash lighting down, almost to the minimum every time. Why are cars lighting up like spaceships to distract me from actually driving at night?

"Phone mute."

This car has no phone connectivity whatsoever, it's just a mute button that they put a picture of a phone on because, according to the manual, it's so you can quickly mute your radio when your phone rings. There is literally no reason to ever use it when the volume knob is directly above it and you can just push that to turn the whole thing off, given you're only doing one of four things:

>listening to the radio, meaning mute and power-off are the same thing in that you'll miss whatever is happening
>listening to a CD, where muting will make you miss part of the song while powering off will remember the disc, track and time it was at before you powered off
>listening to a tape, where again muting will make you miss the song while powering off won't due to how tapes work
>listening to your phone/media player through a tape deck to 3.5mm cable converter, where not only will you miss the music if you mute it, it won't hold position anyway unless you pause the phone instead (and if you're doing that why not just unplug the cable or turn the volume down or etc)

Why does this even exist.

...

You can actually beat the ABS if you git gud.

Also save your Hoosiers from getting flat spots.

farnorthracing.com/autocross_secrets9.html

>On a similarly related note I always turn the dash lighting down, almost to the minimum every time. Why are cars lighting up like spaceships to distract me from actually driving at night?

What I hate is that warning lights don't scale with the brightness setting. I have aftermarket wheels with no TPMS sensors because fuck spending $2-300 on them when I have a Longacre racing tire gauge in the glovebox, and the TMPS warning light is annoying as fuck when driving on a dark road. I leave my gauges brighter than I'd like because somehow having the whole cluster lit up is less irritating than just having one bright icon.

Do you live in California? And I think that's a kia, Right?

>tfw no friends

...

Most of these

Covering up those pesky warning lights you don't want to deal with is literally why electrical tape was invented in 1886.

>ESP OFF
Do you keep that pushed in at all times or do you sometimes drive in Spanish?

89 E30 and under my dash theres a black button that twists and pushes in iirc. I pushed it once and the alarm went off. pushed it again and nothing. tried it several times after that and still nothing. Car always unlocks, starts, and nothing weird.

I'm assuming it's just the aftermarket alarm system and maybe immobilizer that doesn't function as originally intended

Never seen placeholder buttons?

ESP OFF disables the car's psychic projection function, normally the car automatically allows you to see 30 seconds into the future. It's nice to use when you want a more adventurous driving experience.

One time I sat in an Alfa 164. I was looking for a fun shitbox at the time. The dash made my head hurt so I moved on

Touareg? I like that wood but you're right way too many buttons

>tilt the headrest forward so you can't lean back and fall asleep
>super traction control
>open trunk
>fold mirrors in because you're car is too fat

There is nothing confusing about any of this.

jesus fuck at least do it correctly

There's a button in the passenger footwell of my car that makes it beep and tell me the tires need air. I understand it's for towing but nobody should tow anything with an anemic 4dr and it gets pushed EVERY TIME I have a passenger

But he did do it correctly since he did the bare minimum amount of work.

How many miles on the 9-3? My girlfriend and I both had 9-3s and they both threw rods at ~150K.

ford engineering at its finest

I pressed this button once. My 4Runner started blasting Golden Age and this happened.

youtube.com/watch?v=3fR7XKdhTZE

it's called a clutch you autist

Not an imitation crab meat coupon.

It's for when your car tips onto its right side. You push it and it flips back up.

When there is still sticker residue over CEL from PO but no sticker and the lights out.

>How long was it broken
>what did they blow off doing for so long
>what else is nigged on my ride?

I honestly never entirely figured out the heater controls on my car
never drive it in the cold, so fuck it I guess

My old Toyota Cressida had these emergency seatbelt release handles to release the automatic electronic seatbelts in case of an accident. I never pulled them because I feared it would trigger explosive bolts to blow them off like some cars in the era had for the doors.