Honda 2014 Civic LX Wont Start

So it seems its a computer issue.

>key cant unlock/lock car remotely
>inside lock buttons dont work
>nothing appears when turn key

It cant be the battery I replaced it in January.

>2014
>Civic
kys

Thats the plan friend, but i cant injest my exhaust fumes without the car starting!

I dont know, is there anything i could do or do i have to take it to mechanic?

Test the battery again

Test the alternator

Come post again when you have completed those tasks.

Get someone to help you jump it. Then go get it tested at a parts place

>It cant be the battery I replaced it in January.
News flash: It can still be the battery


Also, what you described doesn't indicate a computer problem.

I only thought that because last time it was the battery it made a very loud noise when trying to start.

It could be your alternator failing, which is what caused the original battery to fail.

It's a dead battery, as in completely fucking dead and not just too low of a charge to turn over the engine

This. Probably caused by a bad voltage regulator in the alternator.

The electronics in these years are garbage.

Wasnt my battery or alternator, took to mechanic they said its an electrical issue.

>implying batteries and alternators aren't electrical issues
Did he say what it was? Just grab a voltmetre and see where the battery is at

Said he didnt know, that he tested the battery and alternator wasnt those and hes gonna keep it for a couple more hours driving it around to see if he can find an issue.

>driving it around
So obviously he started it, so obviously it isn't the computer

Sounds like it was a dirty ground and he just fucked you out of hundreds of dollars worth of shop time because you're too fucking stupid to test the shit yourself.

The positive terminal was loose. And i was only charged 100$.

Why are you such a numale cuck that you didn't check this?

>getting rused this hard
confront him,
say 4chin thinks he's full of shit.
report back.

Man, you have an asshole for a mechanic.

>owns a 2014 civic
>Is male (maybe?)


/Thread

Family has been using him for awhile. hes a good mechanic, that was a diagnosis fee, cheaper then the others in the area.

because my father left me at a young age and i was never taught anything about cars by my whore of a mother.

tranny :^)

>Having a Honda Civic and asking Veeky Forums if they can figure out your problem
>0/10

This is why the first chance I got I convince my wife to sell her piece of shit Civic and get a Grand Cherokee. It doesn't take a team of auto technicians with computers to figure out one stupid fucking lock.

>And i was only charged 100$.
For something that had you taken our advice you could have taken care of for FREE.

This is bait though. Nobody is that fucking stupid.

>Family has been getting fucked by him for a while. He's a jew, that was an un-needed diagnosis fee, fucked us more than any other in the area.

It didn't take one in this case either. Literally every single one of us that gave real advice said either his battery wasn't functioning right or his alternator wasn't charging his battery.

...

I would of followed the advice but I had to go to work. Its not bait I just have no tools.

So you had time to bring it to a shop but not time to pop the hood?

Here you asked if you should bring it to a mechanic and didn't heed the advice given. Why bother even asking?

In these posts you claim you took it to a mechanic and that he tested both the battery and the alternator (yet you were at work), but here claim it was just a loose terminal, which the mechanic would have IMMEDIATELY noticed, and you would have IMMEDIATELY noticed had you taken 2 seconds to pop the fucking hood. This is 200% bait.

Honda Civic forums, what are they and why go here instead of there?

BRAND AND MODEL SPECIFIC FORUMS, mothafuckas! Use them. Learn them. Love them.

>keyless fobcucks

He clearly said TURN key, you stupid mother fucker.

This, ladies and gentlemen, is the intelligence level of a key user.

I did pop the hood you nigger. Had to jump-start the battery.

I work split shifts so i brought the car to the shop inbetween shifts, I was asking if i should bring it to mechanic during my first shift, after reading the the solutions people were posting here I decided I couldn't do the tests because I didnt have the tools.

I know you might be a bit dumb from huffing those exhaust fumes, but we have this thing called cell phones which you can use to exchange info with another.

Im blind in one eye so even when i jump started the car i didnt notice. I dont know why the mechanic didnt see it.

>Had to jump-start the battery
Which is when you should have noticed the loose terminal. Blind or not you should have physically been able to feel the terminal being loose.