Your shotgun girl

>tell bitch to stop
>she doesn't
>crash car
Now she has no legs to disrespect you with

The only female who's ever been in my car is my mom while taking her shopping.
A few girls have asked if they could go on a ride with me sometime. My oneitis also asked if I've bought it to pick up girls with.

>Who is she to you?
My best fren.

>Who would you like her to be?
Well she's almost perfect. Maybe a little too tall for my tastes but I love her no matter what.

>Will the airbag kill her or just put her in a wheelchair?
What's an airbag?

Saw her off

Saw off your penis user.

It'd still be bigger than yours faggot

she's eating the bugs off?

Should I post a "Drivers don't need girlfriends" meme now or wait for someone else to come along and do it?

Not with that shit taste it is.

>Implying anyone on Veeky Forums has even talked to a female.

You're asking too much, OP.

Dem feels man
>Girl likes me
>Take her out a few times, have shotgun girl
>No chemistry
>She stopped texting four days ago
I'm not some obese neckbeard iether. I gym, have a decent railroad job and drive a nice old bimmer. She liked my car and said I was funny. But always ended up saying she didn't know what to talk about. Feels bad :(

>Will the airbag kill her or just put her in a wheelchair?
>implying there are airbags

rrreeeeeeee I want a railroad job too rrreeeeeeee

she alright for being really a cheap amputee with a removable prosthetic easy way to get something I always wanted

a fast Russian with a higher capacity for fun

no wheelchair needed and an airbag wouldnt hurt
my car doesnt have airbags anyway

>Who is she to you?
she's my navigator. She's pretty good too, really helps me keep my competitive edge in a race.

>Who would you like her to be?
she can be a bit too bombastic at times. I also hope she loses some weight, I'm worried about her health plus it kinda messes with our car's weight balance.

>Will the airbag kill her or just put her in a wheelchair?
she'd live but it would be extremely painful.

For you.

My girlfriend is the same as yours but not the navigator part she sucks at that and I need to lose weight too I'm getting fat

>tfw no fat gf

>Who is she to you?
Fiancee.
>Who would you like her to be?
Wife.
>Will the airbag kill her or just put her in a wheelchair?
4' 10", 90 lbs - I honestly don't know.

Why do women insist on putting their feet on the dash? Have fun breaking your face with your kneecaps when the airbag blows.

>having airbags

Don't go for maintinance. Replacing ties in hot weather is a bitch. I get sick every few months from all the metal dust when we tighten bolts. Old school work with shit school pay.

Nice footpussy.

Nice footpussy.

What's an airbag? Is that one of them new fangled genders everyone's callin themselves these days?

>Back in my day, women stayed in the kitchen. Not the car.

>my dog
>my dog
>fucking launch her into orbit

>feet on the dash

There's a QT who's really fun to drive with, but they are off-limits for a whole host of reasons.

I wish we could have something together, honestly, but it's never going to happen.

It would probably kill her. She's thin.

>Haven't had a female in my car since I was 17
>Not even my mom
>No idea why I own a full-size sedan
It'd make my life if I had a shotgun girl to desecrate my dashboard with her feet. It doesn't matter if we crash because the car was made in 1978 so we'll both die horribly.

>off-limits for a whole host of reasons
She's your little sister?

>Who is she to you?
Gf.
>Who would you like her to be?
Wife.
>Will the airbag kill her or just put her in a wheelchair?
Well, there's 6 of them so I'd assume she'd be ok.

No, just a close family friend. She's got a lot of personal issues that make her off limits.

>Will the airbag kill her or just put her in a wheelchair?
that car is clearly parked

My Dakimakura
My Dakimakura
I think she will be fine either way

Dude I love your posts

Your mom is clearly parked
>implying parked cars can't be hit

>gf
>wife
>no airbags in one car, probably won't hurt her in the one that does. She's got quite a bit of thicc going on.

Gah what a great woman.

I do it all for you user

>never fails to cause me to feel teeth and remind me that in even a minor accident is probably get my cock bit off.

The worst part is police reports are public, and the hospital will report all road accident injuries to the police. The newspapers rarely mention road accidents unless there is some interesting "twist" in the story. So your name would probably make the newspaper as having the penis bitten off in a public road accident.

did it hertz

>tfw fat gf

and I just gave myself away

>Who is she to you?
2DQT
>Who would you like her to be?
...real
>Will the airbag kill her or just put her in a wheelchair?
>poorfag ride, no airbag

>Who is she to you?
McDonalds bag
>Who would you like her to be?
Double cheeseburger with no pickle
>Will the airbag kill her or just put her in a wheelchair?
Ketchup and cheese all over my windshield

RACERS DONT NEED GIRLFRIENDS

>She's your little sister?
I hoon around with my little sister and she likes it

Are you anime

>tfw no navigator gf
My girlfriend never fails to fuck up directions and put her feet on dash

Whylive

I'd get her feet OFF my car and ON my face RIGHT NOW

I mean, that's not great but I don't think it'd the worst part of getting my dick bit off.

I know that feel fampai

>and I just gave myself away
are you that user that I happened to run into on another board?

while this image was loading i legitimately thought this was going to be some teenage gay boy based on the face, hands, shoulders, and jeans

She does got some knuckly mitts. Most fagg/o/ts wouldn't like getting punched by her - or maybe they would? I dunno.

>implying I need a girlfriend

>talk to a girl at work I never had any interest in
>she is actually really interesting and intelligent
>cute as fuck
>end up having 5hr long conversations with her after getting off work myself
>for the first time ever in my life I have found a person that understands my stupid shit on the same level as me
>take her on a ride in my retro as fuck Honda Prelude mk3
>listen to chill music, she recognizes a few skyrim tavern song covers, really likes it
>talking about relationships and stuff
>I kinda talk myself into a corner and admit I like her
>It's been really obvious we like each other all this time but there is still that tension before it's admitted
>she looks at me, smiling, doesn't say anything
>"user, I like you too."
>I'm in fucking heaven
>kinda scared of how much I like her already after such a short time
>we don't do anything except hug for a long time when dropping her off
>meet up later at her place to watch Sherlock
>talk about stuff after watching a bit
>she admits that she doesn't feel ready to start a relationship yet because of a rough breakup with a guy she's known for over 10 years
>why does this hurt so much, god fuck
>she still says she likes me but not to expect anything
>talking to her after work a few days later
>another guy comes to visit her as well (I know him, a really chill dude)
>he's obviously into her
>after he leaves I (stupidly) make a comment to her about the guy being interested in her
>she gets upset
>she says I'm not in a position to be jealous
>I explain that of course I'm jealous because I'm fond of her
>she says "I told you to not expect anything"
>haven't spoken to her after that, it's been a week

The greatest tragedy of a man's life has fallen upon me, brothers.

I am in love.

What car user?

Apologize, then play it by ear to see if she hangs around other dudes or a relationship starts to form, if not she isn't ready really and you have your foot in the door, if she does start chasing other dudes but only is a friend with you either just keep her as a friend and only hang out once in awhile, or just ditch the thot.

Ex conductor now manager, go for transportation. Schedule sure sucks but pays the best.

I apologised to her pretty heavily on the spot but I think I should talk to her about it more.

I'm just staying put for now. I don't want to do anything without thinking it over first.

>tfw been driving for over 10 years now and never had a girl in the front seat

Don't talk about it anymore, just play cool and chill. And I hate to tell you user it probably won't go anywhere so don't keep your hopes up. Sounds like a typical dumb roastie.

t. user who had same thing happen 3 months ago.

She didn't really want to watch Sherlock, dumbfuck.

I can't fucking believe the level of gender role reversal we've come to in 2017 but girls still want the dudes to make the first move even if they basically put up huge flashing signs pointing to their pussies.

>Who is she to you?
My mom
>Who would you like her to be?
More steady when she holds the camera for my fast food reviews
>Will the airbag kill her or just put her in a wheelchair?
Either one would kill my allowance for monsters and nuggers

>monsters and nuggers
Say hi to your new daddies for me

She shouldn't be harmed at all in an accident, she has so much fat to cushion any wreck. I hate driving with her. My car leans to the right when she's in it. I taught her some stuff about cars and the noises it's making so she always says dumb shit too now
>user, why is the car not going fast but the turbo is spooled?
The car is only slow because you added 600 pounds to it ms. Piggy
>don't take this corner too fast, you're fwd!
Don't worry, it's a right hand turn all I gotta do is let go of the wheel and we'll make a 90 degree turn instantly. Good news is I never get pulled over because the cops don't want to get eaten. I'm now known as the hoghauler to them and need to get a sticker made for my car with it.

They think you're already punished enough

>Who is she to you?
Friend
>Who would you like her to be?
Girlfriend
>Will the airbag kill her or just put her in a wheelchair?
She is tiny asian qt so probably kill her

Pretty much this.
I'd just keep chill with her. See how she behaves. Watch her. Do not express jealousy though. If she comes around great, but if it's too much to bear, just move on and start talking to other girls, if she notices and doesn't just give up, and she hasn't been talking to other guys, I'd just play it by ear. If shes still talking to other guys, just give up and go on. If you ever got with her, I would, as soon as you're on a solid enough ground with her, admit your test you played. If she can't understand or doesn't be cool about it, you don't need her.

Gotta put those girls through the ringer.
These are the games we play sometimes.

>date girl
>they always want to use their dirty ass fingers to draw on the window condensation

bitch, now I gotta look at that dumb ass heart with initials until I clean my windows in and out again.

She's not hurting anything just let her love you. Don't take a woman's love for granted. There's nothing better than a girl who loves you

>she loves everyone else too

O.
Kill that cunt then stop willfully being a cuck

>Who is she to you?
Maybe I can get a Daki made of her eventually so I can drive her around.

>Who would you like her to be?
I want her to be real.

>Will the airbag kill her or just put her in a wheelchair?
I might have to stitch her up.

Just another girl that doesn't want much to do with me anymore

my actual shotgun grill
>who is she?
wife
>who you want her to be
my wife
>will she into cripple?
no she's smart enough to not do this

OP pic
>who is she to you?
some cunty hipster with her feet on my dash
>who would you like her to be?
a pedestrian
>will airbag kill or cripple?
hopefully kill

a grill who doesn't fucking care about my shitbox or my equally-as-barely-working personality, that's fucking all

>now you're just somebody that I used to know

She's a total slut and that's just perfect

>no one
>cute, short girl with cute feet
>no airbags bitch

>shotgun girl is literally any passenger in my vehicle
>tfw 2 seater vehicle
>most of the time it's my gf
>airbag probably won't deploy in the first place

Thanks Anons. I really appreciate the advice. I'm trying to play this smart but it's not easy with these feels.

...

You've already fucked it up before you even got anywhere but a hug. When she said she wasn't ready for a relationship after her ex what she meant was "please fuck me better than he did so I can move on". Of course what her girl brain thinks is that she's not going to get into another relationship until she has "feelings" and guess why girls get "feelings".

My advice is to get her fired before you have to watch other dudes correctly do the dance with her you had the opportunity to and failed then end up doing something that gets your dumb ass fired. This is why you don't date coworkers. If she'd been some random slut from the grocery store you could have forgotten about her already.

I can tell you with 100% certainty that "please fuck me better" was not what she meant.
I don't know if that's how it works with that girl you keep posting all the time but that's not the type I go for at all.

it's his cousin.

She had a deep probably emo conversation with her, told you she liked you, gave you a lingering hug and invited you over to her house to watch a show then when nothing happened her attitude changed and she moved on to other dudes. Please tell me what you could possibly believe she wanted that you failed to deliver other than some deep dicking. Jesus Christ.

Dude is a white trash degenerate. He went on for ages in another thread.

Gotta keep those genes pure.

Dropping her off and watching Sherlock together were two different occasions.

That part of the greentext was pretty easy to get mixed up, sorry.

Hmmm... How long, what happened in between and how exactly did you get invited over? The whole "you have no right to be jealous" flip is a tough one to flip back especially when there's been no fuckin'.

Best flip is the straightforward one where you let her see some girl who obviously is into you but it can't seem on purpose. Still usually only like a 1:5 shot.

Oh shit, I just thought of an even better one that could be combined with her seeing a girl who likes you (or not). It might be best if you just sort of drop it nonchalantly on a day where she seems more friendly toward you than usual. "Was your ex real jealous or something?"

It's a pretty safe bet that jealousy was a big part of any breakup even more so where they try to "stay friends" like it sounds like she was doing. Also, when dropped at just the right time in the right way it can lead to her thinking maybe you didn't really act inappropriately, maybe she just overreacted because of her emotional baggage.

Girls really do do that all the fucking time and unless they're completely retarded they're aware of it and worry that they let it screw things up for them. Of course the chances of that working depend a lot on the tone of your apology and justification.

Start giving her the subtle "aren't your panties unbunched by now?" look and if she gives you the cold shoulder be sure to not look sad, more like "ooookay"

I wasn't really looking for advice but I'm grateful that you care about me.

I'm just going to take it easy for a while. She will want to talk if she is interested in me. If not, too bad.