How would you make money from an army of hobos?

Inmate
Inmate

I can send 20-50 bums anywhere in town, just for the day.

Is there anyway to convert my army of hobos, into making money for me?

All urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=qIYmC8MrhyI
youtu.be/-Q3B-bEKyhM
buttecounty.net/treasurertaxcollector/PropertyTaxes/TaxAuctions/TaxAuctions-FrequentlyAskedQuestions.aspx

TreeEater
TreeEater

Dress them up and charge to make lines outside clubs/bars/stores

TalkBomber
TalkBomber

they would require bathing...

LuckyDusty
LuckyDusty

Hire bums to protest establishments
extort establishments for "protection money" from bum protests

ZeroReborn
ZeroReborn

I can't see much besides having them beg for change, and you taking a cut, and if they don't obey, you and the rest of the hobo army cutoff a limb like that Slumdog Millionaire type shit.

Really, for them to be any use, you would definitely have to bathe, feed and clothe them, and that definitely cuts into profits.

Nude_Bikergirl
Nude_Bikergirl

If they are female you could pimp them out, or sell there companionship.

Garbage Can Lid
Garbage Can Lid

thrown them into a river, shave them yourself, tell them never to speak nor open their mouth.

fuck man, with 50 hobos I would rule the world.

Lord_Tryzalot
Lord_Tryzalot

send them to this place

Carnalpleasure
Carnalpleasure

This is literally how some organized crime groups arose
Beggar guilds were notorious in East Asia

TalkBomber
TalkBomber

there were 10 out of about 2500 that I would have considered playing with, but I would use like 4 condoms

Garbage Can Lid
Garbage Can Lid

take the ten girls
clean them up
get them some sexy and ladylike clothing
get on the street and set up a sign
need money for breast implants

youtube.com/watch?v=qIYmC8MrhyI

Poker_Star
Poker_Star

Sell cigarettes at bus stops, train stations, corner stores and near college campuses

SniperGod
SniperGod

backstory? where do you live? why are they loyal to you?

FastChef
FastChef

bay area, they're not loyal to me

i can kick them out from our center

I control who gets the free trader joe's food (I have received 5 frenched rack of lambs, some of the hobos gave the $25 meat to their dogs...

If they want to use a computer, I can kick them out.

basically I have the power to give them free food/coffee, let them sit down and go to sleep on a dirty couch with their buddies.

haveahappyday
haveahappyday

Gross dude. Makes me want to shower just reading about it

Firespawn
Firespawn

Gay hobo pimpin ain't easy
Imagine how loyal they could be with free meth now and then

BlogWobbles
BlogWobbles

google "tax auction [your county]"
buy a small useless parcel of land for $300
get a food cart and give away food and shit for the homeless
get neighbors to "think of the children (home values)" due to the swarm of hobos
sell the parcel to them for 15 times it's value

eGremlin
eGremlin

also this

youtu.be/-Q3B-bEKyhM

VisualMaster
VisualMaster

It's really simple. Hire only the autists with no friends who are smaller than you.

Get them to line up for Yeezy releases at sneaker stores. Make sure they don't leave the line or threaten to call the cops on them (hopefully build relatiosnship so you dont have to do this).

Give them cash once store opens and take shoes from them as agreed. Once you resell on GOAT or Grailed, give the hobo $50.

You will make thousands.

eGremlin
eGremlin

make them fight
film it
put it online
goes viral

Burnblaze
Burnblaze

/fa/ wants to chime in

CouchChiller
CouchChiller

a small parcel of land here costs 250,000 minimum

BunnyJinx
BunnyJinx

Yeezy shoes?
GOAT?

TurtleCat
TurtleCat

Put them in strategic positions, have them beg for money in rich or suburban areas. Start demanding beg-fees from other hobos and build an hierarchy, you being the supreme leader (starting a cult may be a smart way to avoid power struggles within the hierarchy). Soon you'll have more people joining. Then you can move on to robbery or even take killing contracts.

GoogleCat
GoogleCat

pimp them out to George Soros, bro.

make hay while the sun shines.

happy_sad
happy_sad

well if you're a construction worker you could get them to paint walls and shit for a much lower wage than ny standards. those people are willing to take anything so if youre broke you should take advantage.

Carnalpleasure
Carnalpleasure

What is NY standard.
They arnt very good at doing tasks, but they don't care about getting arrested.

GoogleCat
GoogleCat

this could work

Supergrass
Supergrass

Organize a hobo fight club
Charge admission to public
Fight to the death
Winner gets 10 percent cut

Harmless_Venom
Harmless_Venom

There was a gay old hobo meth head prostitute once.
He was nice, he helped clean up occasionally.
Eventually he was banned for 6 months or so.

MPmaster
MPmaster

That sounds like felony murder

Emberfire
Emberfire

They just need a bit of direction. If they move into packs, just send them to one specific high end restaurant/bar with an outside terasse. Have them beg for food/coins/cigs to customers the whole day for a week (they don't have to be together if that's a problem, they can just agree to hit the same place the whole day).

After a week, just ask for weekly allowance to avoid the place/defend it against other hobos. If price is reasonable (let's say 100/w) and calling the cops can't help, they have no choice

WebTool
WebTool

You can also put them to work selling some crap on the streets and act as a wholesaler/storage facility or even become their private bank for security.

StrangeWizard
StrangeWizard

what state do you live in?

Nojokur
Nojokur

You do know you're a giant piece of shit right? How do you wake up in the morning and not hang yourself from shame?

Fried_Sushi
Fried_Sushi

RIP Bum Fights

Emberfire
Emberfire

california

TalkBomber
TalkBomber

very easily, frankly I think I help people.
someone has to fix the computers, and deal with bums.

CouchChiller
CouchChiller

get hobos
pay them to act like hobos to collect money for them and you
about 15% of the money they make goes to you
this business expands
tons of homeless people start working for you
make tons of money off of homeless people and orphans
profit

it seems like this is illegal

TechHater
TechHater

but it seems like a kek-worthy story
"user MAKES ARMY OF HOBOS THAT COLLECT MONEY FOR HIM"

Booteefool
Booteefool

their not exactly an organized army that collects money for me, I just work in a hobo environment and have a moderate amount of power over them

viagrandad
viagrandad

get each of them to give you $10 a day
Buy research chems and give it to them

CodeBuns
CodeBuns

according to this website
buttecounty.net/treasurertaxcollector/PropertyTaxes/TaxAuctions/TaxAuctions-FrequentlyAskedQuestions.aspx
No California county sells tax lien certificates at this time.
So in California they actually sell the property (as opposed to a tax lien). So yeah, you can get a small parcel for hundreds of dollars as opposed to thousands

Illusionz
Illusionz

butte county is a long ways away, and a huge shithole

I'm in a wealthy suburb in the bay area.

If you could buy a parcel for hundreds or just 10,000 I would buy it in a heart beat.

Fried_Sushi
Fried_Sushi

Why not help them by giving them a job instead of being disgusting.

Ignoramus
Ignoramus

their junkies... hard core junkies...

happy_sad
happy_sad

Local philanthropist found stabbed and raped to death; police suspect angry hobo mob

DeathDog
DeathDog

This is why i love Veeky Forums.

Dear diary, today i met the man who would be king of the hobos.

Deadlyinx
Deadlyinx

You're one sick asshole.

Techpill
Techpill

I believe you. I have my own little squad of hobos too. Best the shit out of one for his money then just kept coming back. Not to rob him to to ask him to do things for me.

I'd give him spice as payment then some other hobos he hung out with started asking for work.

Playboyize
Playboyize

blackmail specific individuals or businesses by having the hobos not leave before they pay up

RavySnake
RavySnake

Where in the bay? which trader joes?

Sharpcharm
Sharpcharm

Lil Tunez Boaty is in town at the Nigger Center
Tickets $20 at the gate
Get your hobs to fill up the line so everyone has to wait
go to the back of the line with prepurchased tickets
"TICKETS, NO WAIT, $40, SKIP THE LINE"

Surely they'll agree to give you 15% of something they could do solo...
Prostitution only works like that because the pimp provides something else worth more than his cut (a place to stay, protection, drugs)

Snarelure
Snarelure

Buy a large apartment complex near a highway

Have them all panhandle

Wait til govt thinks they're a nuisance so they buy me out

Flip 20x profit on apartments

GoogleCat
GoogleCat

People like you are why businesses are sometimes forced to throw away spare food.

TurtleCat
TurtleCat

Eminent domain rarely makes the seizee any profit.

Booteefool
Booteefool

This was so poorly written, how do any of you understand him at all

Evilember
Evilember

I live in San Pedro California, I had this mexican girl tell me about how her father (who she says is apart of a "sophisticated Mexican gang") would take a percentage of the money that the homeless people got. She talked about him with a smile and all happy because she thought I'd be afraid of him. I just kept thinking how she must've been retarded.
But I kind of can see how gangs would use homeless people to be their eyes and ears like the Grey Fox.

Garbage Can Lid
Garbage Can Lid

I'm looking for money making opportunities where I have little to 0 chance of being arrested, or any police involvement.

RavySnake
RavySnake

100 out of 2500
Are you running a homeless shelter or something?

TurtleCat
TurtleCat

So how does it feel being probably the worst person in America?

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