>Be me
>Buy a used, garage kept 2000 Lincoln LS V8
>>Non-sport
>>All the bells and whistles
>32 valve DOHC 3.9L V8 is surprisingly powerful
>Impressively efficient independent suspension and limited-slip differential with traction control has handled EVERY back road I've had the nerve to take it down with ease
>Averaging 24mpg daily (I'm a mild driver)
>Very satisfied with purchase
cont...
Other urls found in this thread:
hotrod.com
twitter.com
what the fuck am I waiting for OP
he wants to turbo it
calling it
The op pic does have an fmic. But what does jaguar have to do with it?
Probably, he's just proving he's s fag
...
The "4.0" in the Jaguar S-Type is the same as the Lincoln LS/Ford Thunderbird 3.9
Does the jag have turbos? Maybe he tried to do a retrofit.
>i am a huge homo
t: op on iphone
Nope, he's just being retarded, LS auto trans break if you look at them funny and the only manual was offered with the V6 only
>luxury sedan with fully BLACKED grill, headlights, and windows
I bet I can guess what color the taillights and wheels are too
Fuck you OP.
That story could easily fit the first fucking post.
Fuckin rain man over here making crazy ass deductions.
Enter Phase Two
>Notice a casual misfire under load going up a hill
>Time for a tuneup
>A few day pass
>Cam Position Sensor failure on pump number two
>Fuck
No space under the hood, CPS is under the dash on the driver's valve cover
>Thorn in my fucking balls
>ID parts #
>Replace CPS
>Starts flawlessly
>What the Fuck is knocking under my valve cover
>Remove piece of shit Jaguar inspired coil covers
>Spark plug ejection on rear passenger cylinder
>Oil in my plug wells
>In the process of doing a complete tune-up and valve cover gasket kit
>Bullshit Jaguar inspired direct coil ignition common fuck up
>Previous owner was old, car didn't get drove enough, spark plug well gaskets dry rotted and inevitably failed
What the fuck Veeky Forums?
Why does Jaguar hate the people who use their things?
There's plenty of space under the hood for a traditional coil-on-plug set up, why would they intentionally design it to fuck up?
I love the car, but damn.
Fuck you, Jaguar.
Fuck you.
I waited like 20 minutes for that? Wow what a letdown.
These were cool cars. Like a alt-5 series. Lincoln should had continued the line. Instead they went geriatric again instead.
why on earth did you need to make this two separate posts
>Get frustrated at heaping mounds of irrationally complicated preventive maintenance necessary to keeping my vehicle fictional
>Shit and cum on everything and everyone around me in a blind rage
Happy now?
>My fictional functional vehicle
Not really, just sounds like normal semi-frustrating car stuff. The car you posted is cool though, post a shot of the motor.
>the way americans pronounce "jaguar"
JAGWAR
...
Gat damn. Thank you.
>Por-SHUH
>KNEE-SAN
What's wrong with Americans?
>HUN-DAY
Looks like a M5 killer.
I'm sure your Muslim invaders Arabic dialect sounds much smoother.
>NISSINN
>HAIYUN-DIE
the hell is wrong with brittish people
nii-san is objectively the right pronunciation.
NISSIN is not an automaker, they are a brake company.
>feh-RARE-e
It's fuh rawr ree. Faggot ;-)
Americans actually pronounce it like that?
LOL
Do they say Volks-Vagon too?
Only Pajeets and Apus. Sometimes they will even call it a Wolks-Vagon
Do you pronounce every borrowed word with the correct native pronunciation?
Didn't think so, fagget
>EYERAYN
Everybody who says
>EERAHN
is a virtue-signaling faggot who works for NPR
>when an american pronounces the word coupé as "coup"
OP here.
The manual wasn't offered in the V8 because of it's nightmarish and inherently weak Jaguar inspired two-piece drive-shaft.
If you wanted to manually shift hard, or simply add more power, in a short time you'd snap the carrier bearing.
You know why?
Because European cars are absolute bullshit.
Nobody wants one for any reason other than to be smug.
They appeal to people who have more money than common sense.
Then why the fuck did you buy one?
Because I didn't know and it was $1,900 you fucking faggot.
It's not "coo"?
>Because I didn't know
Well there's you're problem dipshit, you're an idiot
Actually most americans say POORSH
no
the é has a sound
Yes, blame me for Jaguar's utterly worthless design schemes.
Blame me for their lack of concern with part longevity.
It's my fault that they made a "sport sedan" incapable of handling performance upgrades. And the sole reason for that? Jaguar-shit. All of the Ford/Lincoln component's, under different circumstance, would be fine. But no, they had to use worthless Jaguar shit.
It's all my fault.
English doesn't have fagcents on vowels though.
It's your fault for not doing the research on the car before buying it, sorry to burst your bubble there youngfag, but you paid the money without knowing what you were getting into
>previous owner let the car sit a lot
>new owner gets car
>car has a few parts in bad condition due to lack of use
>"What the shit jaguar sucks"
Being lectured by a faggot with a hard-on for foreign cars doesn't change the fact that none of these Jaguar parts were built to last and the motor company (IF Jaguar techs have ANY common sense at all) knew that when the produced the vehicle.
I'm hoping somebody can learn from this, and won't buy an LS.
Don't try to defend Jaguar's design flaws by pinning the blame on my lack of experience.
Those are bmw lights right? Or am I just going crazy?
Your parts lasted 15 years with barely any use (which can harm some engine parts) and its the first time they break.
Stop blaming jaguar. Cars break. They aren't made to last forever. Even cars made to last as much as possible cant last forever without basic maintenance.
You want to know how I know you're some young dipshit? Because people have known for years to avoid Lincln LSs and Jaguar S Types
I have an 01 jaguar Xj8 4.0 liter and doing plugs and coils on this thing was super easy compared to when I did them for my work truck (4.6 f1shitty). I love my jag and yeah the electronics are junk but overall the thing has held up great for 168k and I drive it pretty hard for a luxury barge
That lincoln is certainly a neat car you dont hear to much about, probably becuase old me still just keep them in their garages to this day.
The driver's side valve cover had permatex on it.
I think it's safe to assume it was the same issue on the previous occasion. Oil in the plug wells.
Two mandatory valve cover gasket replacements in under 120,000 miles? That's unheard of and inexcusable. Bad design.
yes it does, you are simply too dumb to write them down
>keep car for 15 years with stock parts and probably little to no maintenance
>"THIS PART GETS BROKEN! ITS BAD DESIGN!"
>$1900
Poor person buys cheap af old used luxury car and cries like a baby and blames the car manufacturer when it needs a single iota of routine maintenance.
Should have bought a camry, bozo.
If that were true they'd put them on US keyboards like they do in countries where they commonly use languages other than English where such things matter.
>COOPAY
moar liek
>HIA JUST WANTED TO LET YOU KNOW I'M COOGAY
Go beg your wife for pussy old man you've had enough of the Internet for today.
angl*s can barely spell english as it is, imagine if english had as many grammatical tenses or as many variants as romance languages
angl*s wouldn't be able to communicate with each other, the language is caveman-tier
>being this salty that you got BTFO on a Cambodian basket weaving fansite
It's not your fault your parents decided to buy a house under powerlines
The one nice thing about Romance languages is that everything has an accepted gender. Imagine how much triggering there would be if it were ingrained in the very language that all potatoes are female?
...
Why would you design a vehicle that ALLOWS OIL INTO THE PLUG WELL? PERIOD.
I've driven my fair share of shitty things.
This is the NICEST car I've ever had.
But even my old, piece of shit, rust bucket, salvage title, Frankenstein, fire-hazard, 1987 Mustang LX 2.3L never gave me this much trouble.
And it would literally melt the cylinoid the firewall when the starter would stick. The ignition broke and I started it with a screw driver for seven years.
It always had a valve cover leak, it never fouled my plugs. I never had to change my oil because it always had fresh in it.
It always started an ran. It was designed to be run into the dirt and still go.
You know, the American way.
You can't escape it, just wait until this liberal shitstorm hits your country. There will be breaking 10 o'clock news segments about violent protests crying for gender fluid vegetables.
We could inject hormones into them to have FtM potatoes (they cost even more than organic) and really cheap GMO bisexual potatoes that the goyim are forced to grow and eat for equality.
LOL, you're comparing a rock to a torque wrench. Sure, the rock will last longer, but because it's a fucking rock.
The engine isn't designed to do that you stupid fuck. That's the effect of leaving a car to rot for a while and lack of proper maintenance.
It has a DOHC V8, its sporty, it looks nice, does great MPG for what it is and from what i gather from you it did its fair share of work load with you.
Dont expect a good engine to never break for fucks sake. You have to service every car you own.
Of course it was designed to do that you fucking twat.
Say you set dinner on the table.
Then, you take a shit on the same table.
You can separate the two with a cardboard box, and tell yourself: "I've designed an optimal system, where as soon as I'm done eating, I can can save time by just shitting on the other side of the table. As long as it doesn't soak through the cardboard."
Does that make sense?
No, it doesn't.
>>>
Jagwar sounds better than shhaagueeuughgghgh
Go suck a dick euro trash
Damn
fucking christ i cant seem to escape you off topic /pol/tards at all today can I
>pronouncing how it's spelt
I see no problem with "English" English.
This.
You are objectively a dunce.
CONFIRMED shitpost
hotrod.com
unless OP can prove they're David Norton or post bread on hood, that Lincoln isn't even their car.
where did he say pic related was his car
The car's an E38 ripoff, er, sorry...homage, so you're not wrong.
These are such beautiful cars
Jesus I thought they were ugly stock but riced out theyre even more awful
Which such shit engines and transmissions
Not jaguar's fault OP is a retard. The cars are a BMW ripoff with a DOHC V8 engine that doesn't suck. Its by all purpose amazing.
Besides nobody overprices a sporty lincoln.
>mfw jag-you-are
Who the fuck is this guy? I see him posted everyone in a while and he is the poster child for dental hygiene
If had read the thread you would have seen I posted the article My car is a '00 Lincoln LS, non-sport, luxury package, metallic olive drab
Defend it all you want eurofag you're not the one working on it
I am not even european you fuck. You are just butthurt that you dont know how to maintain a fucking car.
I just fucking bought it you sub-human worthless piece of shit I've literally put 6,000 miles on the car.
Jaguar is for faggot's, and only faggot's. Only a faggot would ever knowingly build a motor that routinely has valve cover gasket failure.
As I've spent the last week making sure I researched as much as I could, I've found that every piece of shit Jaguar motor in their 4.0L V8 family does this.
They all have failing valve cover gaskets, every time it fails you get oil in your plug wells.
It's not uncommon for them to fail every 40,000 miles.
Do you know why?
Because Jaguar built a shitty, self destructive engine format, that constantly reaches into your wallet. And they said "Fuck every single customer who buys our shit, sell it anyways."
