Some/o/ne redpill me on Tesla

that logo is left heavy. terrible design

Trying to track or autocross a heavy car is fucking horrendous. Hell, just trying to enjoy yourself in the twisties is horrendous. If I just wanted to drag race ICE is still considerably better past 60.

Last night I dreamt I owned a Tesla.

>I was rich, decided to buy a Model S as my DD, much to my family's surprise
>It was alright, I felt a little let down over how normal it was versus the price I paid, but I was looking forward to the Tesla hype
>Did a few acceleration runs which were fun until the novelty wore off
>It was just another boring sedan car once the INSTANT TORQUE meme magic had settled
>Realized I hadn't plugged it in after doing a load of acceleration runs and panicked

4/10 would not buy IRL

It's literally botnet.
>DLC battery capacity
>mandatory over-the-air updates
>phones home everything about where/how you drive
>impossible to repair/upgrade
Basically iPhone: The Car

this.

also it's a fucking scam. tesla wouldnt have survived if the government hadn't basically kept it afloat with green subsidies

Shhh, logic and reason confuse the Tesla fag.

Low quality, overly priced meme cars that are only practical for faggots who live in cities or countries so small they should not even be allowed to have a flag.

N E V E R F O R G E T E V 1

wew fucking lad that pic

just wew

They originally wanted to call it the "Impact".

i could be ok with it being plastic if it was a solid block of the shit but they couldn't even do that

Tesla is sort of a waste seeing how you still have to pay for the electricity to charge it.

> brake pedal snaps
> one less EV shill to ruin my enthusiast board

their model s is faster than a 918

You mean quicker, and only to 60, past which the 918 is tremendously quicker.

I hear their employees are treated like shit. It's all hype.

Planned obsolescence

I want to get one but I bet this still won't be driving in 20-30 years. Also like your phone, batteries have a number of recharging cycles they do and would expansive to get new batteries for the car.

dlc battery
>simplifies and makes it less expensive to build cars. since they only have to make one battery pack. it actually makes the battery pack last longer. since you can't use all the battery. then battery degradation is slower.

over air updates.
>you don't like waking up with new features for free in your car?

phones home
>giving tesla real world use data. so they can make the cars better and produce fully autonomous car software sooner and cheaper than others.

repair/upgrade
>not true. an owner upgraded his early model s to have autopilot 1.0, by his own hands. if you can get panasonic 18650 cells. you could change out bad cells your self. the car know which cells are bad. the car runs on linux.

your phone is probably a bigger worry. google and facebook listen to you through your phone. your phone sends location data constantly.

no.

government was offering the money. tesla took it.

elon musk pls go

Elon Musk’s empire is fueled by $4.9 billion in government subsidies.
latimes.com/business/la-fi-hy-musk-subsidies-20150531-story.html

At least learn how/when to green text you dumb faggot shill.

The cars are fine, but I would never feel comfortable supporting people who think that they will replace 100% of all transportation and energy production within absurdly short timeframes while belligerently insulting any legacy companies and technologies.

It's fucking disgusting, and they should chill the hell out before they fall victim to their own hubris

>Testla

Hey, that's pretty good.

Left heavy?

>BUY CHINESE BATTERIES

Sounds like Bently's motto

If you stop and go a lot youre in the city and not touring for distance

>See that mountain? You can climb it!

yes sir

Elon Howard plz go

over budget and fuckup and through not holding experienced employees and continuing high contract work from other firms. still manages to make worse battery than chebby, Honda, and Toyota when Tesla literally only makes ev.

would still lose to a tuned gen 1 insight in miles and marginal cost return.

no you cant, that mountain is the size of France.
Its also on mars, quite hard to get to.

Why the fuck would you make an electric car and not have 4 engines and 4 wheel steering with ecu controlled power to each wheel. You could lane switch and turn at incredibly high speeds and do 180s at a stop with such a setup.

which in turn would lose to a stock civic in terms of miles and marginal cost return.

the fuck is there an extra T in the picture??

The fact the thread got this far before anyone noticed is hilarious.

It stands for testosterone, girls.

I noticed.

And yet Veeky Forumstists get mad because when they notice plastic trim pieces compared to heavier alternatives.

>Electric car brand using the most domestic materials and us factories compared to almost any almost any other brand in the country

"Gee I wonder why the US Govt. is giving them all this money?"

>That ramp
What happened there, a landslide?

There is probably a good reason, likely cost and energy or something. Shit's already a bit too expensive for what you are getting just for all the engineering and batteries.

...

...

Will do sir.

Unreliable

...

...

>Jeff Bezos in the tesla thread again

Don't teslas have the best crash safety rating of any car?

got a problem with me?

He's such a cuck.

below 60mph

yes, people that post stuff like this cherry pick the worst and try to paint it like this is what generally happens. My older cousin bought a tesla and he says its the best car he has ever owned. sure its not perfect the interior isnt on par with something like a high end class but for a car company that is extremely new it is very expressive.

No, do you jeff. kek

>pay $80k for cheapest tesla
>interior isn't any better than a $30k shitbox

tesla is a shitty meme and I hope electric cars die

A very trendy car manufacture adored by a bunch of braindead libs.

Plethora of electrical problems (surprise surprise), cheaply built materials, most noticeably the pedals (like pic related: ) but it's not like the typical Tesla driver would use those anyway. Just pray this shit doesn't keep you locked in the cabin when it malfunctions and powers down.

Tesla's are just as bad, probably worse than FCA's cars and that's saying a lot.

But they can make quick cars which is impressive, but that's the only upside.

If you paid $60-120k on a shitty car would you admit it?

so you admit its a piece of shit?

This, they are so ashamed of paying so much for the car that they buy another one. Classic Stockholm syndrome.

tesla batteries come from japan or nevada.

It's got nothing to do with being the only mass marketed EV-only car company

two urban americans stole it. drove around in a 100 mph police chase. crashed it into several cars, several lamp posts. before jumping a curb and crashing into a jewish temple. the rear end got suck between two walls several feet above the ground. while the front end continue forward. the future two gentlement getting their lives' on track and going to church, were then ejected through the windshield. they managed to live long enough to die in the hospital.

So they are complete shit (according to people in this thread who have never touched one), yet their owners are compelled to buy one again because they have to buy an EV, and only from the manufacturer who produces the highest volume of EVs? Oh, that makes total sense!

EVs aren't bad but Teslas have a very restrictive "walled garden" user experience like Apple products.

Imagine what would happen to thr PC hardware enthusiast community if all computers were built like Apple products.

This is why auto enthusiasts don't like Tesla.

>This is why auto enthusiasts don't like Tesla.
"auto enthusiasts" are mostly retards that can barely handle a cold air intake install. You can modify a Tesla just as easily as any other car. There are endless possibilities, but since there aren't aftermarket companies pushing $200 5 minute bolt ons it hasn't appealed to the lowest common denominator "car guys" yet.

Mediocre car that would cost 250k if you stopped paying taxes

>"auto enthusiasts" are mostly retards that can barely handle a cold air intake install.
"Auto enthusiast" means different things to different people, but IMO you're not an auto enthusiast if you don't have at least the mechanical skill to change oil.

>two urban americans
Stop being a wussy. Just say NIGGERS

You mean that tree-hugging hipsters and pretentious rich people looking to lease some good karma back aren't very smart?
Who could have guessed! I mean Kia and Hyundai selling like hotcakes, must be incredible machines!

>people with more money than me are all dumb
>the literal cheapest cars on the market are selling a decent amount, that's the same as a new manufacturer outselling the top luxury brands in their own segment

Great post, you really are coming across as intelligent!

...

There are other cleaner sources that electricity can come from, like solar.

>solar
>clean
lmao

I can see it now, GM IMPACT.

That might of worked had they not pursued the project solely to have a sacrificial lamb to gut as soon as the oil companies got the Cali ZEV mandate overturned.

GM may have given the EV1 wings, but Daedalus did't rip the wings off of Icarus when he was barely off the ground. The smartest thing any of the former EV1 owners could of done was hide all the cars in an unmarked warehouse on the outskirts of town surrounded by a Faraday cage and reported them all stolen.

Never been able to confirm but I think Francis Ford Coppola has an intact EV1 that he hid away when the crusher came knocking. Best thing about being rich is being able to tell almost anyone to fuck off I suppose.

Not to mention it's a lot cleaner in general to run a handful of big power plants than thousands of ICEs. I think that comic was directed at people who are so full of themselves with the save the planet bullshit. There's 8 gallons of oil in every tire, not to mention the paints, plastics, resins, the manufacturing process, etc.

solar isn't all that common through most of the first world.
also image doesn't make sense as the g1 insight holds a very small charge.

...

panels are expensive. also home owners association won't allow more than a full panel where I live.

>panels are expensive
So is fuel and electricity.
>also home owners association won't allow more than a full panel where I live
Not my fault you're fucking dumb enough to live in a communist shithole.

...

And the manufacturing process for the panels, the batteries, the car, ect?
The mining of lithium alone to produce one car puts out a ton of pollution and environmental issues.
I can't find numbers on it, but I am willing to bet on it that a diesel car is more environmentally friendly for at least 100k miles

I don't know user, 45 grand into a solar panel installation can buy me a Nissan versa and the fuel to daily it for 20 years

But it doesn't, 95% of the world still heavily relies on coal fire power stations for electricity and most countries are already nearly at capacity for energy production meaning if all cars went electric those countries would need to build new coal fire power stations because the alternative to a coal fire power station is something that cost 50 times as much and produces far less power which means a lot when we are talking thousands of megawatt hours and billions of dollars.

Such great electric production in winter/rainy/cloudy days, boi!

Also, how angry are the pixies that the kar uses? Because a solar panel just won't produce much voltage, and you'll likely need a step-up transformer, which means some efficiency is lost there

Also, I remember reading about how there's just not nearly enough of those rare materials to produce solar panels to satisfy most of the world's requirement (which only increases constantly, to make things worse). Of course, there was also that group of smort chinks who found some lead-based material to double the efficiency of solar panels, but it's still under research

These people don't understand what the mining requires

SHITTONS of heavy vehicles to move SHITTONS of rock to get the very rare, sometimes very toxic materials for batteries and everything else

And the processing of such materials isn't nice, either. Doesn't help that it's also difficult and expensive to recycle the material already put into batteries and whatnot

It truly is a fucky system. Too expensive to recycle, too nasty to just keep on truckin' from the part of clay that holds the materials

Oh boy I can't wait to LS swap my Tesla so it actually makes the fucking power that they claim it makes

>Doesn’t understand the purpose of an hoa

literally a PR gag and bait for people that can't into math

Then once the batteries go bad you need to do the process again. It's 12,000 to replace the batteries, but it is covered in their 8 year, 120k mile warranty but I guarantee they will find a way to shaft you. Tesla says the battery will be 30% degraded by 8 years. Elon Cuck is out to make money, not save the Earth.