Truckerfag Thread - /TFG/

Lube, lots of lube.

When an oncoming driver waves at you

You become a disgusting subhuman member of the weaker sex?

All right calm down storm weenie

I too become a proud woman of color when that happens, user.

Also, use this >

Kek.
>"That you Gundam? This thing ain't going to suck itself."

>TFW doing 60 km/h feels like lightspeed while in the bush

Since when did posting a reaction face mean you literally transform into the picture? Y'all've been on this website long enough to know how reaction faces work, the concept is only like 15 years old.

last night I accidentally the whole roller grill...
6 hotdogs. No buns or topping, just meat. I'm going to die

I have fun not following established guidelines when it comes to writing and language at times.

RIP colon.

*pushes glasses up*
*inhales sharply through nose*
You didn't format your meme correctly
*resumes raising other men's children*

...

Alright, whip out your sausages and marshmallows!

No time dude I legit had to pull that family out of that minivan. It was some thing else

That truck eventually totally exploded too. 2015 western star

But enough time to take a photo?
Before or after you heroically freed them?

Paramedic got there and actually knew what to do

>Implying I don't wear a pair of nez-pince glasses on a chain like an old librarian

>And everyone started clapping
How badly were they injured?

>Craft beer 6 packs
>Not your father's
>Craft beer

Muh autism is triggered

Ooohhh trucker of the year award is coming your way

They were pretty messed up but they all lived somehow. I was pretty sure they would be all dead I really didn't want to look in there.

I already was going to be idiot

Do any of you have any experience with turbo compound?

All around me are familiar faces
Worn out faces
Worn out faces

I find it kinda funny
I find it kinda sad
The dreams in which I'm dying
Are the best I've ever had

>inb4 stupid opinions from one of the primeshills, condescension from truckerfag, or arrogance from ef

What even is that thing? It looks stupid. I bet it sucks. Loser.

Let me know when you're ready to join the best™

Jej. Mission accomplished.

Sup /tfg/
I went to a job fair and this place is offering free training and placement. Should I go for it? anyone have experience with kllm? they're having an openhouse tonight...

Always enough time to take a selfie first. Its what we do these days.

Can prime trailers not hold together for 10 minutes

See ya

Maybe if stupid rookies would stop running them into poles and shit.

>mfw that's real

I thought that was a shoop satirizing me kek

I hate corporate baby-talk. Just tell it like it is; 'STOP HITTING THINGS WITH THE TRAILERS YOU FUCKWADS'.

My job sucks, but at least I don't get shat on by HR for speaking my mind.
I may have to put up with juvenile 'banter' from people who don't know when to stop and shut up, but I can get away with telling people to shut the fuck up, or complaining about the drivers suffering an acute case of 'lazyprickitis'.
And nobody threatens to discipline me over cracking terrible puns.

You talk like a fag and your shits all retarded.

you are a literal fag. literally

Alright boys
This is what it's all about
800$ partial going 5 miles out of route and 3 at drop off

100$/mile

Like a fox. You are no Bepis.

>tfw Elon Musk puts us all out of work tonight

>200mi range

It was just a whisper in the wind,

"Meat"

>not driving with your sausage out
Look at Mr. Company Man!

Good job if true man. Too many people forget drivers are first on scene to almost every accident. Just another way bots will kill people.

>hauling reefer for .88cpm as L/O
I can't imagine how badly they pay company drivers Desu.

This is one of the things I came to love most about a small company. The culture is real, rather than this fake PC bullshit.

>"and the wind cried,.....shower"

>Daily reminder of who EF really is

>look for b.s. in chemistry jobs
>some bullshit about truck driving hazmat w/ my degree required from BASF
are there seriously truckerfags out there with STEM degrees?

>that blood

Poor kid.

>accidently

You wut m8?

Trucker pupper is a go boys

Australian Shepherd??

yeah crossed with border collie

looks kind of like a guinea pig in that picture

Oh I thought that was doubles who had that

It's nothing special. Every big company offers free training, there's better but there's worse.

You know why truckers have dogs?
A sheep is too obvious.

Nah, not me.

It could be worse user
i.4cdn.org/mlp/1510861541980.jpg

is it JRHNBR?

>tfw I usually drive 350 miles a day
I could throw on a sleeper and a generator and shitpost all day.

>tfw drove 9.5 hrs today and got 302.3 mi

Washington and Baltimore are the most cancerous cities at rush hour. With the most cancerous motoring public. I have to get to the very back of Long Island tomorrow too. You cannot make money running per mile out here.

>Washington and Baltimore are the most cancerous cities at rush hour. With the most cancerous motoring public
Fucking agreed. I live about 30 minutes south of baltimore. Moving back to my hometown and pa next week. Fucking this fucking state and everyone who lives here

I said this to my THICC boss the other day, she had no idea what I was talking about.

She's like perfect height for an assfucking.

There are retards in suits and ties pulling into the rest area with their 4 wheelers and flooring it through the truck parking area to merge back onto the highway and get ahead of maybe 4 cars. If that is not cancer I don't know what is

And of course my account is banned on League of Legends again so I don't even know how I'm going to get out my anger

>bus riders

How can't they not know about satellite pumps?

Is it possible to get a job with a DUI on record? It happened six years ago so it isn't on my driver's record anymore/ie doesn't affect my insurance rates, but it will show up on a criminal background check

I can have short days too.
Really hoping for the split sleeper study to prove effective. In the coming year

>Swift: Best Driving At Night With One Working Headlight

There was a time when I had no headlights for a couple nights and drove my 18 yard dump on an indicator alone.

>No tail lights for 8 years running and only one front indicator works

The second night I taped a flashlight to the bumper because light by indicator had me driving too slow.

>pull into that shitty Love's between Seattle and Portland for fuel
>literally 30 fucking charter busses in the fuel aisles
>trucks backed up onto the interstate
>guess it's time for a double western cheeseburger and a fap
>swing a blindside back into an empty spot
>emerge from the sleeper balls drained and arteries cholesterol laden
>still 5 fucking busses at the pay line
>can't pull out of my parking spot for another half hour because the fuel line is 3 wide through the parking lot
>another hour later I'm fueled up and ready to head to the rest area north of there because the cell service is good enough to watch my Chinese cartoons
Fucking bus drivers.

It's possible as soon as you buy a new SSN and driver's license.

The guy who trained me at Prime tried to kill someone with a shotgun

>All that illumination
What the fug. Its like a wall of lights from a music video.

>Not getting master race california double cheeseburgers
Its like you don't even like Carl's Jr./Hardees.

Do tell.

I'll get one lo-carb from time to time, but they didn't exist when I was a kid, so they don't hold nostalgiac value.

Tried to shoot someone with a shotgun when he was younger in missed. Went to jail on some lesser charge then got out. Somehow got into trucking with some shady company without even having a CDL. Turn his life around from there. Now works for Prime in his their top trainer.

He's pretty cool guy. Doesn't seem like the murderer type it all. I go to church with his mom sometimes when I'm in the area.

Yes. Most will take you if you haven't had anything in 5 years.

That DUI is the only thing I have on my driving or criminal record both before or after the said incident 6 years ago, and it's now off my driving record. I had a party at my place one night and decided to go on a beer run. Oops.

Why would you lie to a fellow user?

>B-but muh thousand island dressing!
I tried one of the Canadian Carl's Jr. equivalents to the 'Six Dollar Thickburgers' done lo-carb, and it was super sloppily put together with small pieces of lettuce for the shell. It was a messy shit show to eat. 2/10 would not recommend.

>Church goer
>Friends with an attempted murderer and his family
You become a richer and richer blend with each new fact we learn, Primely.

>Beer run
>Not stocking Costco volumes of liquor at all times
Rookie move.

What happened to all the sweet blog posts that used to be on here? All this stupid trucking. This thread sucks now.

Is that what you tell her when you let one rip?

JACKPOT

>not going to church every week

It's like you think you don't even need God's grace

>tfw the 2 tubes of meat that comes out of your asshole 4 hours later looks more appetizing than the 6 tubes of meat-type pâté thay went in your mouth

Gay!!!!

Yeah we all have those great dreams where you die. Then we wake up and see that you evaded another ban.

Yesterday morning it was raining and they’re resurfacing I-95 so it’s all rough and slick and really sketchy. I was driving to work and there was a car in the ditch with the airbags deployed n shit, like it might have happend 30 seconds before I got there.

I was going to pull over and make sure they were OK, but then I saw it was some newer BMW 5-Series so there’s a 99% chance the world will be a better place if the person bled out. The cunt probably cut off a semi truck while crossing 4 lanes with no turn signal to make their exit at the last second.

Decent.

Home time pupper is keepin me comfy right now.

Hopefully come Tuesday, I'll be a /TFG/er. Any first time purchase advice? Planning on buying a Garmin GPS, microwave, kettle, and maybe a laptop down the road.

I was on 95 today and all the Audis and BMWs are so entitled and reckless. You did the right thing not checking on him.

Don't buy a microwave or kettle unless your truck already comes with a high wattage power inverter, or you are allowed to buy and install a big inverter in said truck.

12v lunch box heaters are pretty handy for heating up canned goods like soup or stew, sandwiches, hotdogs, pizza, etc.
You can buy baking tins that slide right into them for cheap at dollar stores or Wal-Mart that make for easy cleanup.

>MFW blasphemers
Baptised Roman Catholic, son.

Along with the Garmin GPS, a good road atlas for double checking GPS routes and a dashcam would be wise choices.

That's actually one of the things I was recommended to buy, an inverter. Any particular one I should get?

To power a microwave you're going to need one that is around 1000 watts or more, which will need to be hooked to the batteries with heavier gauge wire to work properly. Not cheap. As for specific brands I couldn't say. Pure sine wave inverters are better for powering sensative electronics like game systems, but cost more.

Wait for the Intel chips with AMD GPU’s next year if you plan on casually gaming on that laptop.
1500w* - a 1000w microwave actually draws about 1500w from the outlet if you run it at max power. We have 1800’s at Skyline and I actually tripped it the other day. Need to ditch this old microwave and get a new one.

It's been roughly 24 hours and I still haven't shit. My farts tho, dear lord. This truck will be tainted for months, I hope I don't get pulled in for inspection. I was gonna skip eating today but I just bought 2 whoppers

Yeah, its all about that peak wattage. We have a 750 watt microwave (I believe) in the pump cab of the oiler that runs off of a 3000 watt inverter. The inverter powers the printer and rv style a.c. unit for the pump cab as well so it has to be huge though.

Pray you don't get pulled in for an inspection. You don't have a bol, msds or placcards for those toxic fumes.

>not ordering a Wendy's triple without the bun

Do you even keto?

I think this on a daily basis friendo.. :^)

>That build
Kek. Its like a real life Gru from Despicable Me.